disclaimer: i don't own Bones.

but i own 7 of Kathy Riechs Books, i'm on the second and it rocks i suggest it for reading . i think Andrew Ryan in the book is Seeley Booth in the show, not positve, buti think.

Life was different without him. It was cold and lonely and everyday there she realized it was wrong and stupid to say she didn't love him. With Booth at her side she realized her life was better, not by much, but better. He was always there for her and willing to make her smile, but she pushed him away.

Sighing she looked down at her desk, the photo of them sat there, they both smiled at the camera. They were so happy together, now he had a family of his own, she was in it as little as possible. He had a wife and, though no children, one could tell he was extremely happy with it.

Life without him hurt, one man after another, no meaningful relationships, mostly one night stands or small relationships that ended only a month or so. But nothing worth committing to. With him life was worth committing to; sometimes she would wake up just to see him and spend time with him.

Life with him was great, until he proposed, then everything changed. She knew she loved him, but didn't want marriage; she was independent and could take care of herself. She didn't need a man to control her. So she had turned him down and tried to push him out of her life, but that didn't work out as well as planned.

She felt he had only proposed because she was pregnant and it was his kid. She didn't know why she expected that, but it seemed like something he would do. After her child was born she tried all she could to keep them apart, otherwise he would want to bring the marriage proposal up again and she didn't want that.

"Mom?" a small boy came to her office door, rubbing his eyes where tears rested.

"What's wrong?" she asked getting up from her desk.

"I can't sleep. I had a nightmare" He whispered walking over to his mother to sit on her lap.

She pulled out her chair and allowed her son to sit on her lap as she held him and rocked him back and forth to calm his nerves. He was hot and shaking; she knew her son had a rough night.

He had been sick with the flu and had been getting little sleep. Spending the weekend with his father and step mother had been some form of a break for her, but rough on his dad. His step mom, however had tried the best she could to make him feel better, getting him all sorts of medicines and missing out on work to spend her time trying to make him feel better.

Though she knew Booth's life was happy and a lot of good had come out of her turning him down, but sometimes she would wonder if life would be better if she had told yes. If she had agreed and married him, would life be better? Or would it be miserable? But then again, what could be worse than her life now?

Slowly she looked down to her sleeping son and got up, carrying him to his room so he could sleep. As she tucked him in she reached over to turn the light off at the nightstand only to stop and look at the picture.

In the picture Booth stood happily next to his wife, her son right in between of them smiling at the camera. Sometimes she wondered what he ever saw in her, but then again she had spoken to the woman and though they were different, they belonged.

"Good night mommy." Her son whispered through the blankets.

"Good night, Parker." Rebecca whispered kissing Parker on the forehead, turned out the light and left the room.

As she entered her office again, her cell phone went off, picking it up the voice of a woman she didn't expect spoke.

"Rebecca?" the female spoke.

"Temperance?" Rebecca asked confused.

"Yeah. How are you?" she asked curiously.

"Fine, yourself?"

"I've been great, but I was wondering how Parker was? After this weekend I was hoping he was doing a little better."

"After this weekend? Did something happen?"

"Well he threw up on Booth's and my bed and I was curious as to how he was doing. He has been especially tired and fell asleep on my lap a few times."

"Well he just woke up from a nightmare and was burning up, but he's fine now." She said.

"Well that's good." there was a faint voice from the background then Tempe spoke up. "He's fine Seeley. He woke up earlier, but he's fine now." There was some more talking before Booth was on the line.

"Hi Rebecca, you're sure he's fine right?" he asked a little flustered.

"He's fine, trust me. I know how to heal my own son." She snapped back.

"Ok, I'm sorry, you're right. Well I better go; Tempe's having problems getting the comforter out of the dryer."

"Alright. I'll have Parker call you guys tomorrow when he wakes up."


Before the phone was hung up Booth could be hear yelling at Temperance as a loud noise of something hitting the floor could be heard.

"Tempe are you ok? I told you not to pull that out without me!" he could be heard yelling a slight laugh in his voice. "Get off of the floor."

Rebecca listened closer and listened until the phone was hung up and the dial tone was all she could hear.

Yup. Life was different and possibly lonely without him and she had realized it too late. Though he was happy, her life was miserable and every time she talked to temperance it was always a reminder that she had what she wanted. Temperance Brennan Booth had the life Rebecca wanted and though she would always regret saying no, she knew deep down it was for the best.

But she would always think would life would have been had she would have said yes.


Well? how was it? did it reak bad?