Lane's Law

By Denise(kdsch123)

Pairing: Lois and Oliver

Rating: PG ish for possible language and situations.

The day had been getting worse from the moment her alarm clock went off. Reaching over to stop the objectionable music, Lois knocked her alarm clock off the nightstand to a tragic and definite death. The clock was in huge chunks on the floor now, but not before the dj had a chance to cheerfully warble, "Don't break any mirrors, folks, it's Friday the 13th" Therefore it was no surprise at all when the small mirror shattered with a tiny crack as Lois set her purse down on the kitchen table.

"I should've stayed in bed." Lois thought, emptying her purse to dump the shards of glass that had collected in the depths of the handbag. "It figures." Dumping the handbag over her garbage can, Lois heard the glass shatter again at the bottom of the pail, and then cursed herself again. She hadn't replaced the liner after taking her garbage out the night before, and now millions of shining fragments of mirrored glass twinkled at the bottom of the white pail. "I don't have time for this crap today…" Lois moaned, shoving her things back into her purse. A large shard of glass that she'd managed to miss jabbed her in the thumb, and Lois ran down the stairs, bleeding thumb in her mouth, late for her planning session with Martha Kent out at the farm. Halfway down the stairs, Lois heard a snap, and looked down at the heel of her right shoe. Brand spanking new black pumps and the heel had been effectively snapped in half. Sighing, she limped back up the stairs and quickly changed her shoes, the sensible black flats that she hated. Finally, Lois sailed down the stairs and out to where her car was parked.

Or, where it used to be parked.

Her snappy little red car, the first new car she'd ever owned, the one she still had four years of payments on…was gone. "Damn! Freaking Damn!" Lois swore, as her handbag strap broke, spilling it's contents on the smooth blacktop of the Talon's parking lot. Her cell phone burbled and holding back tears, Lois bent over to pick it up. "Hello?" She answered, ignoring the fact that the little screen on the phone was cracked and dark. Replacing her cell phone would have to come AFTER she replaced her car.

"Oh good, I caught you." Martha Kent's voice was gentle and relieved through the static that hissed in the receiver. "I wanted to make sure that you didn't forget that presentation that we needed for the allocation committee meeting next week. I really want to go over it again."

"No problem, my laptop is already in the…" Lois looked up at the place where her car had been parked the night before. "Mrs. Kent? I have a problem. My car was stolen, and my laptop along with it. I have my notes in my briefcase…"

"Oh, honey." Martha was sympathetic. "That's horrible. I'll tell you what. Why don't we worry about this meeting tomorrow, and you take the time you need to get this all sorted out? Clark will even come out to get you if you want to be around friendly faces later."

"Thanks, Mrs. Kent. I don't know what I did to deserve this, but I must have really pissed someone off up there." Lois groaned. "I'll call you when I've got my life back under control."

"Of course, Lois. Just call if you want to come out to the farm to relax." Martha Kent hung up, and Lois dropped the broken phone into her bag with a small flourish. Tossing everything back in her bag (and fishing a small silver of mirror from under her fingernail with bloody results), Lois trudged through the Talon, back up to her apartment, dreaming of a hot shower and a big, big cup of tea. Everything will be better after those two things, Lois thought, I just know it.

"Lois!" Lana Lang's gentle voice carried up the stairs behind Lois. Lois turned, and saw the other girl coming up the stairs behind her. "Just wanted to let you know that there won't be any water today until the water company comes to fix that meter. I'm not even opening the Talon until it's fixed. Hey, are you okay?"

"I'm just having the world's worst day. It figures about the water – I was just thinking about taking a hot shower. " Lois backed up a step and sat down. "My car and laptop were stolen during the night. If I ever get my hands on the bastard who did this, I swear I'll kill him, but with my luck, he'd probably kill me first."

"Oh my God." Lana's eyes were wide. "I'm so sorry. Did you call the police yet?"

"NO." Lois sighed, looking down at her broken phone. "I'm not sure I can even call out with this thing."

"You ARE having a bad day." Lana replied, trying to stifle a grin. "Should I hide the ladders and take down the black cat decorations?"

"You are so cute." Lois sneered, trying to rise with dignity. Her shoe came off her foot, and both girls looked down at it. Lana reached over and picked the shoe up, dragging with it a trail of gum that made both Lana and Lois both wail "Ewwww."

"That's it. I'm calling the cops, I'm calling my insurance company and then, I'm going to bed. This day is over." Lois' voice echoed through the Talon as she walked up the stairs to her apartment. "Don't look for me until tomorrow, when it's safe."

Lana nodded, and then smiled shyly. "I guess this is the wrong time to mention that the water problem caused a flood in the basement and that some of your boxes might have been ruined, right?"

Lois stopped on the landing, dropping her ripped bag, letting everything cascade away from her down the stairs. She stared at Lana in stony silence for a moment, and then turned away, marching up the stairs to her apartment. The door was open and the key in the lock. It was the final straw, and Lois brushed away the tears that flowed down her cheeks, completely against her will. This day was definitely over.

"Finally, some good luck! At least I didn't lose my keys, too!" Lois cried sarcastically, snatching her keys out of the lock but slamming her foot in the door at the same time. Lana Lang sighed, picking up Lois' things as the apartment door above crashed shut, followed by unearthly wailing that made Lana's skin crawl. Friday the 13th had broken Lois Lane.

Over the next couple of hours, the police arrived, and were escorted upstairs to Lois, who was holding court from her sofa. The insurance adjuster had also come and gone. An almost deathly silence fell over the Talon, and Lana busied herself with small odd jobs around the Talon while she waited for the people from the water company. The chimes over the door tinkled in welcome, and Lana looked up as Oliver Queen made his way toward her. Lana made a point to school her features into a mild and neutral expression. Lex's opinion of Oliver was not good, but Lois seemed to really like him and Lana wanted to be fair.

"Lois called. Is she upstairs?" Oliver asked, and Lana nodded, pointing to the winding staircase silently. He nodded, and went up, taking the steps two at a time. Oliver walked to Lois' door, and knocked softly, listening for any sign of her at all. All he could hear through the door was the sound of Nilsson singing "I Guess The Lord Must Be In New York City". She was watching "You've Got Mail." Oliver rolled his eyes and tapped on the door again.

"Lois? Hey...I got your message and I spoke to Mrs. Kent. Can I come in?" He heard the shuffling of slippered feet. The door opened, just as much as the chain lock would allow. Lois was in her pajamas, baggy blue flannel men's style pajamas with pink bunnies, and she scowled at Oliver through the space. "Did the police come?"

"Yes. They're trying to track my car through it's GPS." She peered at him. "What are you doing here?"

"Mrs. Kent told me you were having a bad day. I came out to Smallville to take you out, distract you. But, you seem pretty content to be in your pajamas..." The door closed and Oliver smiled as the chain scratched open.

"You can come in." Lois opened the door wide enough to let him pass. "But I'm not leaving this apartment today. Chloe has already been warned to stay far away from me."

"Okay." Oliver held up his hands and looked around. "Why are you hiding?"

"It's Friday the 13th and it's shit all over me." Lois held up her bandaged hands. "These are from a broken mirror. She pointed to the heap of electronic parts and black plastic on the kitchen table. "That's my clock radio. I have a pair of very expensive black pumps that need to be taken to the shoemaker and just to make matters worse..." Lois hesitated, and then sighed, her cheeks flushed bright red. "It's my time of the month. But it's early. So, I'm crampy besides."

Oliver started to laugh, but thought better of it, simply raising his eyebrows in surprise. " It has been a bad day for you. I never believed in Friday the 13th myself. I was born on Friday the 13th."

Lois was not impressed. "Oh really?" She folded her arms over her blue flannel covered chest and smirked. "Does that make it a lucky day for the rest of us then?"

"Well, I'd like to think so. My mother always said it was a lucky day for her because of me." Oliver smiled. "I'll play along with your misery, if you want. Pause "You've Got Mail" while I'm gone. When I get back, I'll bring everything we need for a day of hiding from bad luck."