Just a small pointless fic without meaning. I got inspired from an X-Men Evolution fic, where Magneto spent some 'quality time' with Quicksilver. It gave me a plot bunny. What can I say? I can't resist making fun of the Bad Guys… Beware of OOC-ness!
Disclaimer: The TMNT, Shredder, Karai and Hun belong to Mirage Studios, and I'm the first one to admit it, so don't sue.
Getting the License
"You want what?" Saki stared at his adoptive daughter with eyes wide as sausage pans.
"You heard me, dad. I want to get a driver's license," Karai said. She had come and asked for audience, and since Shredder didn't have anything better to do for the moment, he'd let her in. What she wanted, however, took him completely by surprise.
"But why? We've got thirteen private drivers, why would you want your own license?"
"Why not? Everyone else my age's got one!"
"I don't think everyone that is… um… how old are you, again?"
Karai sighed. "Twenty-one, dad."
"Oh yes, of course. Twenty-one. I don't think all twenty-one year olds have their own license."
"Oh yeah? Say one that hasn't!"
Shredder thought. And thought. And thought. At least, he turned sour. "Well, how should I know? My memory is not what it used to be. You have a right to memory gaps at my age… whatever my age is. I can't remember it."
'Geez,' Karai thought. 'He doesn't even remember his own age, let alone mine.'
She decided on a different approach and brought up her secret weapon – the Puppy Dog Eyes. "Pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaase?"
Saki grimaced. "Karai…"
"Please, daddy? Please pretty please with sugar on top? Pleeeeeeeeaaaaaaase?"
"Oh, all right then!" he groaned.
"Thanks dad! You're the best!"
"So, what car would you like to use?" The evil alien and the ninja girl were standing in the garage. There were limousines, convertibles and vans stuffed with weapons everywhere.
Karai couldn't decide, there was so much to choose from. "I don't know, dad. Which one's your favourite?"
"My favourite? I don't think that matters, after all, you'll be the one, um, driving."
"But you're coming with me, aren't you?"
Shredder made a little jump. "C… Coming with you?"
"Yes, I need someone to teach me, right?"
"I was kind of going to pay a professional for that."
"It wouldn't be as fun. C'mon dad? Pleeee–"
"Okay okay I'll join you! Geez!"
A couple of minutes later, Shredder found himself in a red convertible together with Karai. "Okay. So what is the first thing you do before you start driving?"
Karai studied the instrument board in front of her. "Oh, yes of course!" She pushed a button, which activated the windshield wiper. "Um… or maybe not."
"Uh huh. Turn that off and then check the – GET OFF THE ACCELERATOR!"
Karai scratched her head. "Sorry."
"Don't think about it, the paint on that garage door was starting to flake off anyways, I needed a new one. Hun, open the door."
The giant man with the silly pony tail opened the newly dented garage door by simply ripping it off and throwing it to the side. "There, master."
"Thank you." Saki was now regretting with a passion his decision to 'help' his daughter. "Now, Karai, check the rear view mirror before we enter the traffic. Pull out carefully and LOOK BOTH WAYS! MIND THAT BUS!"
"Whoa, people in this town drive like crazy! Can't you sue, dad?"
"Eh, tomorrow perhaps. Now take it easy, okay? In the traffic, you have to – RED LIGHT! WATCH OUT FOR THOSE PEDESTRIANS!"
"Same goes for you, guys!" Karai shouted. "Walk straight, you could've gotten run over! By the way, dad, how fast can this thing go?"
"I'd prefer it if you decided not to find out. Listen, Karai – no, don't! Slow down! Slow down! Stay on the street! AAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!"
A shocked, terrified but furious shop assistant exited her shop – or rather what was left of it, since half of the convertible now was in it. "You. YOU. Do you have ANY IDEA of how much such a window COSTS? You've completely DESTROYED my shop! I'm gonna sue! I'm gonna –"
Saki managed to drown her words (although it wasn't easy). "Ma'am, I am really sorry about this. We certainly didn't mean to cause any damage to your property. Here's my calling card. Phone me." He handed the upset woman a small piece of carton.
"Now look what you did, Karai!" he hissed.
"I didn't do it on purpose!"
"I think it is time for us to go home now. Just be calm and – NO DON'T DRIVE ON THE SIDEWALK! Look out for the fire hydrant! Slow down! 85 MILES PER HOUR IS TOO FAST! There is no room for the car in that alley! NO! Oh. I take that back, after you hit those trash cans out of the way, there was room after all."
"Sorry. I hope the dents aren't too big."
Shredder closed his eyes. "No worries, I've got fifty-two more cars anyway, why should this one matter?" The last thing he wanted to do right now was to continue the 'driving lesson', but he couldn't stay in the alley forever. "Maybe I should take the wheel now."
"Oh please, we're as good as home. Can't I drive the last bit?"
"That's great, dad!" Before Shredder could make a move, Karai had pulled out again.
"Karai! Karai be careful! Get control of the caaaaarrrrrrr! If you want to race, DO IT A RACETRACK!"
"Sorry. By the way, that flashing red light on the car behind us, what is that?"
A few minutes later, four mutated ninja turtles came running over the rooftops. Suddenly, one of them stopped. "Hey, dudes!"
"What is it, Mikey?"
"Come and have a look at this."
His three brothers came up to him and they looked down at the street.
"Wait," Leonardo frowned, "isn't that the Shredder?"
"And Karai," Don confirmed.
"And two cops," Raph added. "What're they doin' there?"
"Maybe they have found out that he is a mass-murderer with the purpose of taking over the world, and decided to talk him out of it," Michelangelo suggested.
Donnie hauled up a pair of binoculars and watched the scene below them with interest. "Hm… it seems like Saki's being heavily fined for speeding."
"Well, that's what it says on that note he got from the policeman. No less than 900 dollars."
"Shredder? Speeding?" Leo found it hard to believe.
"Whatever," Raph said. "He's always been a weirdo to me."
And with that, the four turtles took off against the sunset.
Sorry for that sunset-thing at the end. I couldn't resist.
Feel free to review!