-----Author's note: Hey, you guys. This is going to be an epic story of love, honor, friendship, and confused teenage hormones. The last part entails comedy, so there will be that, too. This is my second fic, and the first one in the Naruto setting. In case anyone's wondering, this will be more harem, than anything else, but I do love reader participation...
I do not own Naruto, but any other characters and ideas are my own. Enjoy...-----
Bright blue eyes danced over one of the most beautiful things to have ever graced our young hero's sight. His mind swam through the warmth he got simply by being in her presence, his chest swelling with the anticipation of what he knew was coming. He snickered to himself, knowing she was taking things so slow because she knew it drove him crazy. It was like a game. He hated the wait, but the tension boiling up from below was so fantastically good that he wanted her to move a little slower.
"Slow down for me, baby..." Naruto Uzumaki whispered, his mouth hanging open a little as the time was finally coming.
"Naruto-kun..." Her soft voice passed over her silky lips as she bent over in front of him, her face near his own. The blonde shinobi could literally see the steam between the two of them, "Naruto-kun...you're so silly with that face," Ayame giggled, setting the bowl of ramen down before the teen, who laughed in turn.
"Ha, ha, I can't help how hungry I am, you know that," The teen admitted as he prepared to dig into the bowl before him.
"I know, I know. But the way you were looking at me before I got here...I was starting to think you were going to...you know, do something...un-Naruto-like," Ayame surprised the ninja by sitting across from him, setting her elbows onto the surface so she could rest her chin in her hands.
It was a little after eight at night, and the Ichiraku ramen stand was barren save for their number one customer. His stomach growled, but he couldn't bring himself to let loose his savage hunger on the food. Not with her looking at him...like that. He'd read about it before in mangas and even once in one of ero-sennin's perverted books, but he hadn't ever seen it on a real person's face. But he could see it in her eyes...the infamous schoolgirl love sparkle.
"You're not even in school!" Naruto pointed at her, nearly knocking his bowl over, "Are you?"
"Wh-What are you talking about, now?" The daughter of the stand's owner asked, a look of confusion spreading across her face.
"Uh, nothing. But what did you mean 'un-Naruto-like'? What's not like me?"
After laughing a little, she replied, "I meant...ha, ha, uh...nothing, never mind. So how's your training been going?"
'Oh, man...is she trying to make small talk with me? Ok, ok, there's a few different things this could mean. 1. She wants to torture me and keep me from eating. 2. She wants me to do something for her. It's probably that. 3. She...ah, no, not that...' "It's been great! I haven't seen Jiraiya in forever, so I've had to train alone, but that's alright. For now."
"You spend all day out by yourself? You're so dedicated, Naruto-kun..." Ayame purred, the love sparkle lighting back up.
Going into his 'yeah, I'm great' mode, he was of course oblivious to this, "Aw, it's nothing for someone like me! After all, as future Hokage, I can't let a little thing like some time alone get me down!"
"But what about your friend, Sakura? Doesn't she go to train with you?" Ayame asked politely.
Naruto thought back to the last time he had asked Sakura to train with him. If his somewhat blurry memory served him right, it ended up sounding like a date, and he wound up on the ground with a bleeding head. He woke up several hours later alone and it was nighttime. He learned to pick and choose his words with her a little more carefully, after that.
"Uh, no, not Sakura-chan. She'd rather...not do that, I think," He admitted with a sigh.
"Well, if there's anything I can ever do for you..." He jumped a little when he felt her foot under the table, stroking his leg, "I mean it...anything...you just let me know, ok, Naruto-kun?"
He could now see the sparkle in her eyes, and he didn't think it was the schoolgirl love sparkle anymore. He thought it was the glazed look of being stoned out of your mind. He squeaked in surprise as her foot went just a little too high, and tumbled out of the booth in shock.
"Naruto-ku-u-un, where are you going?" Ayame asked, her tone of voice one that Naruto wasn't at all familiar with. It sounded like desperation paired with desire and sadness. Whatever it was that sounded like...
"Uh...I gotta...go and do...something that isn't here, see ya!" He bolted from the stand, without having even touched his ramen.
'Oh man...what was that all about? It must have been some test by Mr. Ichiraku to make sure I was there for his food, and not anything else! Geez, he should know me better than that, after all the times I've been there!' His thinking was interrupted by his stomach, which growled loud enough to surprise even him. He had forgotten how hungry he was because of Ayame's little stunt. 'Great, now what am I gonna ea-'
His thought pattern broke a second time as a dark figure appeared before him, scaring the living hell out of him. He fell back with a shout, though he still drew a kunai out, and was ready to defend himself even from the ground.
"Ugh, still so shaky? What's Jiraiya been teaching you all this time?" The voice was familiar, and the man offered a hand down to help Naruto up.
"Kakashi-sensei! It's just you...don't surprise me like that!" He shouted, sticking the knife back into his little bag.
"Relax, relax. Actually, I guess I can understand why you'd be a little jumpy..." The jounin admitted as he began to walk beside the teen, who was planning on making a straight line for his house.
"You can? Why's that?"
"Well, I happened to see your little run-in with Ichiraku's daughter. Pretty funny, actually..."
"You saw that?" Naruto asked loudly, tripping over his own feet and stumbling sideways into a couple of garbage cans.
"Smooth," Kakashi commented, "Yep, I saw it alright. Once I get these copied, everyone will see it," He said plainly, holding up a few pictures of their little meeting. There was a nice side shot that showed Ayame's foot riding up a little high on him.
"Wh-Wh-What? Kakashi-sensei, how did you get those without me noticing? Y-You're kidding right? You wouldn't do that...right?" Naruto pulled himself out of the mess of garbage, and tried to swipe the photos from his old teacher.
"I'm a stealthy guy, Naruto, what can I say? And yes, I would copy these. Unless you come with me to see Tsunade, that is..." The white haired ninja stuck the photos back in his little bag, and changed directions, knowing full well that Naruto would be close behind.
"Old lady Hokage? What does she want with me? Is it a mission?" The thought of a scandal with the ramen stand's daughter fell from his attention as he followed Kakashi.
"Yeah. Sort of."
"That's not helpful! Is it a mission, or not?"
"Well...sort of," Kakashi replied calmly, his tone nice and relaxed, just like always.
Thoroughly pissed off, the teen crossed his arms and glared at the back of his teacher's head, "Fine, be that way."
Slowing down so that his former student could fall in stride with him, Kakashi looped an arm around the teen's shoulders, "Ok, I will. Thanks for being so understanding, Naruto," He laughed, like he didn't have a care in the world, "Oh, and if Tsunade acts a little nicer than you're used to, just roll with it, ok?"
"Well, here we are. Just like you asked," Kakashi spoke up, motioning from himself to the blonde beside him. They were in front of Tsunade's desk, in her dimly lit office.
Tsunade's eye twitched a little as she replied, "Yes, I see that you're here. Two hours later than I asked, you dumb-ass!"
"Aw, don't be like that..." He trailed off when he saw the fire burning in the Hokage's eyes. That meant it was time to shut up. Not that Naruto was particularly good at picking up on things like that.
"Hey, grandma, we came over as soon as he found me! So is there a mission you wanted to give me, or what?" He up and asked, his hands behind his neck, as he liked them.
Kakashi half expected her to throw a brick at the stupid ninja, but the only thing that went his way was a warm smile and a few words, which was the other thing he half expected, "Don't be silly, Naruto-kun. I don't plan on sending you on any missions for quite some time, actually..."
'K-Kun? Did she just call me what I think she did?' The teen found that, for once, he seemed unable to form words.
"But what we're about to tell you should help to clear some things up, for you," An energetic voice cut through the awkward silence that had fallen over the three in just a few seconds. The voice belonged to none other than Gai, the blue beast of Konoha. Beside him was his favorite pupil, the youthful Rock Lee. Both were decked out in their customary green spandex training suits.
"A-And...what do you want to tell me?" He stuttered a little, looking at all of the faces around him. Lee, Gai, Kakashi, then to... "Huh? Where'd old lady Tsunade go?" He blurted out, the beautiful blonde no longer behind her desk. He whipped around, coming within an inch of the Hokage's chest, and freezing up. He was expecting a punch in the face, or a knee to the stomach, but what he got was a little...better? Well, better is a matter of opinion, and Naruto wasn't sure what his opinion was, at the moment.
The Hokage wrapped her arms around Naruto and pulled his face into her chest. She held him tight, rubbing her face in his hair and giggling a little, "Naruto-kun, you're so dependable and hard working...have I ever told you how much I love that about you?"
"N-No...Can't...breathe..." Naruto struggled for life saving air as he was smothered in the hug.
"G-Gai-sensei!" Lee stammered his eyes wide at the sight before him.
"Lee! Don't look, it's not right!" Gai replied, slapping his hand over Lee's own hands, which were clasped over his eyes.
"It's so much more serious than I thought it would be! To affect even Tsunade-sama! It truly is a most dangerous problem!" The younger of the two in spandex exclaimed.
"I know, Lee! But with youth on our side, we will emerge victorious! How can we lose?"
The two began to laugh, teeth sparkling in the dim light of the office.
Kakashi sighed, pulling out his perverted book and crossing the room to sit in Tsunade's chair, "You've gotta be kidding me...it figures I'd be one of the people to deal with this. You two...see if you can pry her off of him long enough for an actual talk," The apparently bored jounin instructed the two in green, who lunged at the two with all of their strength.
Several minutes later, Naruto was on the ground, hands over his head as he whimpered in fear. Lee and Gai were both sporting bruises and black eyes, but they had managed to pin Tsunade down after convincing her that Naruto liked it better when the girl couldn't move. He wasn't sure what they were saying, at the moment, but he would soon find out...
"Naruto, I've got some good news, and I've got some bad news," Kakashi mumbled as he clapped his book shut, laying it down on the table.
"The...The good news, please!" Naruto nearly shouted, jumping to his feet and clasping his hands together like he was ready to beg for it.
"Well, the good news is that you're gonna be a lot more popular, around here..."
"...And what's the bad news?"
"I want to have your babies, Naruto-kun!" Tsunade exclaimed from the ground, the flush in her face not nearly as deep as those of the men in the room, except for Kakashi, who seemed to think it a funny idea.
"I guess that's the bad news. No, wait, that IS the bad news. A little reminiscent of your encounter with Ayame, no?" He asked casually, like Tsunade hadn't just admitted wanting to bear Naruto's children. He waited for a response from Naruto, but was disappointed to find the boy unconscious and bleeding from his nose all over the place. He groaned, getting up from his seat, picking up the Hokage's glass of water from the desk. After pouring it out onto the teen's face, he waiting for the spluttering to stop before asking, "Are you gonna be alright? I can't talk to you about this if you aren't going to be awake for it."
"You're too ancient to be having babies, you old lady! Quit screwing with my head!" The ninja exclaimed, rubbing his head with both hands, "What the hell's going on?" He turned to Kakashi for an answer, who motioned for him to calm down.
"If you'll be quiet and conscious for a minute, I'll tell you. Ok?"
Naruto nodded, but he was still shaking a little.
"Ok. Now, you may or may not have noticed this...well, no, you've probably noticed it, but the ladies of Konoha have been treating you a little...different," When Naruto raised a hand and opened his mouth, the jounin quickly cut him off, "No, it's not because they finally see you for who you are. You're still basically a loser, to the majority of them," He felt a little pang of guilt for being so blunt with the young ninja, who hung his head in disappointment.
"Then what is it?"
"Well, it happens to be the nine-tailed fox, actually. Demons have needs, too..."
"Getting warmer..." Kakashi thought it was funny Naruto was skirting around the answer. He could just up and say it, but that would take the fun out of having his old pupil do so. Lee didn't see this as funny, and blurted out the answer.
"The nine-tailed fox wants doodles, Naruto!" He shouted, his face red and his eyes wide.
"D-Doodles? Like...drawing? I could draw it something, I guess..." Naruto mumbled, wondering where he could get some crayons.
With a sigh that showed he could hardly believe the teen's clueless-ness, Kakashi said, "No, geez. The nine-tailed fox is ready to procreate, and is letting off an aura that women find irresistible. It only happens every few thousand years, but luckily enough...I mean, unfortunately, that time is now. It's attracting mates, you idiot."
"Mates? ...Mates? Whoa! Hey, no thank you! I'm not ready to..." His voice got real quiet as he said the last part, "Make love..."
Gai snorted a little, and even Kakashi snickered. Lee looked from one sensei to the other, wondering what was so funny about what Naruto just said. Tsunade opened her mouth, and would no doubt have said something inappropriate had Lee not clapped a hand over it.
"Don't laugh! This is a big problem! How am I supposed to deal with this? Baby-making does not sound like a good idea, right now! You guys have gotta help me!"
"Don't worry, we will..." The copy ninja replied, rubbing the tear out of his one visible eye. Naruto could just imagine the big grin he had on under his mask, "Even though it's hilarious on many levels, this is a serious issue that we have to focus on. We've all talked it over, and decided we can't simply send you away..."
"No!" Tsunade shouted, starting to squirm around under the grips of Lee and Gai, "If you send him away I'll break your necks and use your hollowed out skulls as fruit bowls!"
"Yeah, so you're not leaving the village," Kakashi repeated, "But Gai and I can't keep a constant eye on you because, honestly, we have things we HAVE to do. So..."
"You sound like you don't trust me! Do you honestly think I'd take advantage of anyone, like that?" He protested.
"If we weren't here right now, Tsunade would probably be on top of you within a few seconds. Now, do you honestly want me to believe that: A. You could get away from her, B. You'd even want to get away from her, I mean come on, look at her, and C. That you haven't had any impure thoughts ever, at all, about anyone? You can try all you want, but you're just another guy, when it comes down to it," Kakashi explained.
"Ok, fine. But if you guys can't protect me from raging female hormones, who will?" He looked from one teacher to the next, and found that they were both pointing to Lee, who had an awkward smile on his face.
"What?" Naruto shouted, "He can't even land a date! He has no experience when it comes to getting women, so how's he supposed to understand them at all?" He was conveniently overlooking the fact that he wanted to repel women, at the moment.
"My adorable student is the perfect candidate for this mission!" Gai exclaimed, a light flicking to life out of nowhere, illuminating his eyes and setting off little sparkles nearby, "He is a trustworthy ally and friend, who will do everything in his power to keep you safe from the raging libidos of women, everywhere!"
"At least until we figure out how to stop the nine-tailed fox's mating aura..." Kakashi pointed out, "Then you're free to make doodles with whoever you want."
"Stop calling it that!" Naruto yelled, damn close to blowing a fuse.
"Lee will be staying with you in your home, too, to make sure no one sneaks in for a little 'visit' at night. Since we can't keep you out of sight for certain...blonde reasons, you'll just have to try and get by as best you can until we can figure this all out. If you can stay away from any girls, and women, that would be helpful. Whatever you do, don't do anything to anyone!" Kakashi pointed a stern finger at Naruto.
"You mean 'with' anyone, right?"
"Sure, that's what I meant. And lastly, for God's sake, don't go anywhere without Lee."
"Lee!" Gai shouted, "I'm counting on your youthfulness and morality to shine brighter than it ever has! Our good friend Naruto is in need of a true friend, and to keep youthful, one must have truly good friends! Do you understand?"
"Yes, Gai-sensei! I will not let Naruto have doodles with anyone or anything, even himself!" Lee shouted, saluting his teacher.
"Dammit! If any of you say that again, I'm going to break your face in!" The troubled blonde ninja shouted, moving for the door.
"Alright, Lee, on three, let go of Hokage-sama, and then run with Naruto as though your lives depend on it! Do you un..." Gai trailed off when he saw that Lee had already rushed off after Naruto, leaving him and Kakashi alone with Tsunade, who was sitting back at her desk, "Wait...what?"
"It looks like when he isn't around, there's no difference with the women, at all. She's completely back to normal..." Kakashi mumbled, staring at Tsunade in wonder.
"What are you idiots gawking at? Get out of here, I've got business to take care of!" She pointed at the door for them to leave, and the two quickly obeyed.
"It's like she doesn't remember a thing..." Gai whispered to his rival as they entered the hall.
"I wish I didn't remember any of this...I don't know whether to feel bad for Naruto, or want to kick his ass..."
-----Author's other note: And there's chapter 1. Anyone interested in seeing where I can go with this? Think I should just stop right now? Got something you want to see? Whatever's going on, let me know. I think it could be pretty fun, personally. Well, thanks for reading...-----