A/N : Thanks go out to the reviewers, especially Evelyn W for her suggestion (#31)! I hope I've done it the justice it deserves.
HPHPHP HPHPHP HPHPHP
31. All Hogwarts students should take care to keep away from Harry Potter towards the end of the school year in order to avoid injuries and possible death.
- Hey, how did Lucius Snape manage to get something on here? (Ron)
- Maybe he taught his owl to write? (Harry)
- Draco? Write? (Ron)
32. This posting forum is not to be used for uttering, writing, implying or otherwise communicating death threats or threats of harm.
- Dumbledore certainly knows how to take the fun out of things. (Draco)
- He's a lot more fun than you. (Hermione)
- Oh, this coming from the frizzy-haired wonder who spends her evenings in the library looking for hair smoothing potions! (Draco)
33. All students situated within 1 seat/row of a Weasley in a potions class should come wearing water-proof, fire-retardant robes.
- Neville's hair is growing back quite nicely. (Lavender)
- Filtch hasn't seen Mrs. Norris for a few days, though. (Hermione)
34. Students are forbidden from practicing flying charms on their common room floor rugs.
- Who was that singing songs from "Aladdin" anyway? (Cho)
- They flew by too fast for me to see them. (Ron)
- I think it was Blaise and Pansy. (Harry)
- What??? (Draco)
35. The Room of Requirement is not to be used as a Lookout Point for students who are unable to keep their hormones under control.
- I'll meet you by the lake instead now, Ginny. (Dean)
- I'll be waiting for you. (Ron)
- Dean, don't write our meeting spots here. (Ginny)
36. Tricking the elves such that they end up banging their heads against doors, walls and other solid surfaces is not tolerated.
- …rather, it is encouraged. (Draco)
- 10 points from Slytherin for their lack of decency. (Professor McGonagall)
- If they all lost points for that, they'd be in the negative. (Ron)
- 10 points from Griffyndor for stating the obvious. (Professor McGonagall)
- Who shoved up a broom up her… (Ron)
- Mr. Weasley! (Professor McGonagall)
37. Do not encourage Peeves!
- The PTA – Peeves Therapy Association – will meet tonight to discuss coping with Peeves and his latest round of practical joking. (Cho)
- The PTA meeting will be followed by the PGA – Peeves Gone Association – to discuss means and methods to rid us of him! (Ginny)
38. The Forbidden Forest is just that…a forest and forbidden.
- How many times must we explain this to the slow learners? (Professor Snape)
- Until they learn. (Professor McGonagall)
- We're going to be doing this for a long time, aren't we? (Professor Snape)
- Survival of the fittest, Professor. (Professor McGonagall)
39. Please do not entertain ideas of turning the squid in Black Lake into Hogwarts' largest calamari.
- The 7th year's beach party has now been cancelled. (Lavender)
40. Hogsmeade is a priviledge, not a right.
- It's a privledge that's alllllll right! (Goyle)
- Was that a complete sentence? (Ron)
41. Please do not tell the first years that the Sorting Hat made a mistake and that they are no longer welcome in your House.
- Yes, please. And would a prefect from Slytherin please come and remove your little hatchlings from the Hufflepuff common room? (Cho)
- Must we? Consider them a gift. (Blaise)
- Thank you for the thought, but we wish to return your gift. They're screaming more than baby Mandrakes. (Cho)
42.Do not keep relocating or removing Mrs. Norris' litter box!
- Dobby is most unhappy with the person who put it in the kitchen. (Dobby)
- I thought my meal was a tad crunchy last night. (Blaise)
- Mmmmm...kitty crunchy surprise. (Ron)
43. The betting pool on how long the next 'Defense of the Dark Arts' professor will cease immediately.
- The pool is now closed, kiddies. (Fred and George)
- But to the bets placed still stand? (Ron)
- Of course. Who ever picked last week obviously did not win. (Fred and George)
- That was me. (Neville)
44. First Years : Please use extreme caution when an upper year invites you to play Wizards Chess. You may be drafted into playing a pawn.
- Who ever convinced young Creevey to play one of the white pawns, would you please return him from wherever you sent the captured pieces? (Angelina)
- My knight took him fair and square! (Draco)
- Slytherins don't even known the meaning of fair! (Ron)
45. Avoid seemingly shallow puddles of water on the floor.
- Who knew Luna couldn't swim? (Neville)
- I did. (Luna)