TITLE: New Teacher on the Block

AUTHOR: Kayla Shay

DISCLAIMER: BtVS is owned by Joss Whedon and respective parties while all things Harry Potter are JK Rowling's.

NOTES: Found on the back page of a writing journal, so don't expect much. Thanks to Demona for the summary!

Chapter 1: The Long Year Ahead

Xander stood in the back room attached to the classroom that served as his new office. Nerves were getting the better of him as he began his mental pep talk.

'Okay,' he told himself, 'you can teach kids. They will listen and enjoy class. They will not make your life a living hell… Oh, for… I just damned myself. Now, no matter what, I will fail miserably. Why did I get volunteered for this job in the first place? Why me!?'

His mind paused at the sudden sound of chatter from within the classroom. 'Voices. Oh merciful Zeus. The first class is here.' He moved to the cracked door in front of him to peek out. 'Let's see… That Potter kid and his friends, that will be good.'

Looking over the other students gathering in the classroom, his eyes came to a dead stop on a white-blond head. 'Oh hellfires, I've got a mini-Spike in my first class. I'm doomed.'

Gathering his resolve, he pushed the door open and after a giant gulp for courage, he opened his mouth. "I'm Alexander Harris, just call me Harris and don't bother with that professor stuff. Um," he stuttered as his brain threatened to shut down, "welcome to the first day of Defense Against the Dark Arts, or as I plan to call it, How Anyone with Half a Brain can Save His Own Ass."

His mental tirade returned, 'No laughs, and judging by the shocked look on that Hermy girl's face, I shouldn't have used the word 'ass' in front of impressionable young minds. This is going to be one long year…'