A/N: One year anniversary! Yay!! I'm so excited, I could cry! But I'll save that for later. Anywho, this chapter is going to be different from every other chapter in this story. But don't worry, if you don't like the way it's written, it won't stay that way. I just couldn't think of a good Angel story, so I smushed her in with Devil and they just had a huge bitch fight. It was fun! I hope you enjoy reading it, because it was pretty damn fun to write.

Oh yeah, and say hello again to all the previous chapter owners. They make a special little cameo appearance at the end. Hahaha! I don't know why either!

— I would like to give a shout out to a good friend of mine! mr. bauer has written a story that I think you should check out! It's a real nifty little story, and all he wants is some more people to leave him some nice comments. You can even see the ones I left him, if you want! Anyway, if it makes you feel any better, I had no idea what I was reading about and still enjoyed it!

Disclaimer: Alas, I still do not own the masterpiece that is Tekken. Oh Namco, how you scorn me!

Rating: Still T for all the same stuff. You know, violence, language, blah blah.

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The Good, The Bad, And The Annoying

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Devil:

I'm sure you're all well aware that Kazuya Mishima is one major bad-ass. And, I'm not telling you that you're wrong or anything, but do you know how he got to be so bad-ass? It wasn't the suit, it wasn't the hair, it wasn't even that cocky attitude if his. No, the reason why Kazuya is such a bad-ass is one word: me. I made that sniveling child everything he is!

Oh, come now, you really don't know who I am? I'm the Devil for crying out loud! I made that pansy Kazuya everything he is!

Angel:

Oh, be quiet you! All you managed to do was break a perfectly kind boy! You should be ashamed of yourself more than anything.

Devil:

Angel? What the Hell do you want, cupcake? This is man talk. No one cares about your righteous bullshit. Besides, everyone knows that Kazuya was always just a little bastard to begin with. Even if you had gotten to him first, he would've just ended up being a bastardly priest or worse.

Angel:

Hold your tongue, knave!

Devil:

Knave? Who the Hell says knave?

Angel:

I do, you rube. Now, believe kind people when I tell you that Kazuya is merely confused. He is a kind, kind man deep down, but he has trouble expressing his feelings because of this twit over here.

Devil:

Twit?! How dare you, bitch! But if you're so smart and believe so deeply that Kazuya is all good and shit, then tell me why he sold his soul to me in order to get revenge on his father and kill him?

Angel:

It was a moment of blind anger, obviously.

Devil:

Oh yeah? Then how come he still wants to kill him? You think that's all my doing? Well, I got something to tell you, Princess, Kazuya's just a bastard. Yeah, he sold his soul to me, but all that crap that he did to people in his life was all his doing . . . mostly. I mean, I may have had a hand in a few of those.

Angel:

Roughian. But I still see no validation in your point. Kazuya may have been a bitter child, but he didn't go out of his way to hurt people.

Devil:

Oh yeah? What about the time he threw a fork at Lee? Or beat his father within an inch of his life? Or when he almost threw that same dear ol' daddy over a cliff? Hmm? Or what about all the other people he beat up? All the insults directed at Paul? His extreme unkindness to Jun? What about all that, light weight?

Angel:

Well, you do certainly give many examples. But just because he's confused and his actions dictate his confusion, doesn't mean that he is a bad person.

Devil:

It sure as Hell does! Look at the facts, pansy. Kazuya has been beating people up since he was but a wee little lad. You can't tell me he's been confused all his life.

Angel:

Just because he fights doesn't mean he's doing it with the intention to hurt someone. People fight for all kinds of reasons, and I don't think Kazuya was doing it to be malicious. In fact, look at all the good things he's done! Remember that time he ran out in the street and saved that puppy?

Devil:

That's only 'cause the damn dog stole one of socks and ran off with it.

Angel:

True, but when he got there, he could have merely yanked the sock away without saving himself. But he didn't, did he? No, he saved it.

Devil:

That was a really shitty point.

Angel:

Or how about the time when he banded together with his adopted brother, Lee, to stop his dad from doing whatever evil he was going to commit.

Devil:

Hahaha! Yeah, so he could rule the Mishima Zaibatsu! You're making really crappy points and only emphasizing my point further, douche bag.

Angel:

Hmf. Fine, I will give you my honest opinion. I think Kazuya may have a bit of mean spiritedness in him, but I truly believe it's all your fault.

Devil:

It probably is.

Angel:

So kind of you to admit that.

Devil:

Anyway, I'm gonna tell you why Kazuya's a bastard. And you're gonna shut up and listen.

Kazuya is, has, and will always be a bastard. The reason: his father. His father raised him to act like a little prick and trust no one. And while he was young and impressionable even. Not only that, but the way his father tried to toughen him up obviously failed as well. An extreme for an extreme is always just that. Extreme.

But you know what, I'm glad he's so bitchy. He was the perfect host! And he succumbed to me without reservations or fears. I bet if you would've floated your candy ass down there and said, "Are you all right, young child of God?" he would've pushed his stomach in and bleed all over so that he could die faster. In fact, I know that's what he would've done. Sorry, toots, but Kazuya's always been just a cranky little bastard.

Angel:

Oh, and you know everything now? You listen to me, cur. Everyone is born kind. Kazuya was, indeed, corrupted, but think of all the decent things he did. He despises his brother, but you don't see him beating him up at every chance he gets, like you seem to suggest. Oh, and here's a big one, Kazuya even learned to show love for another human being. And while it may have just been a one night stand, I feel Kazuya held strong feelings of love for Jun Kazama. They even had a lovely child together.

Devil:

Whatever. His kid's a bastard too.

Angel:

How dare you! Stop referring to people that way!

Devil:

Wah, wah. And, anyway, just 'cause he had sex with some lady don't mean nothing. A man's got needs he has to relieve, you know. Oh wait, no you don't. He doesn't even like his kid!

Angel:

And whose fault is that, really? Jin gained half of your soul when you so bravely decided to flee from Kazuya's dying body. And then, when you went back to Kazuya (after Jun beat you up, I do recall) you realized that you now only had half the power that you once had. Thus, you decided it'd be a cute idea to make Kazuya hate his own son!

Devil:

Grah!! Shut up! It wasn't like that, ok?! Kazuya was dead weight, a fresh new source was lookin' pretty damn good, and I didn't lose. She tricked me!

Angel:

I seem to recall you pleading with her for her baby, and she yelled at you, refused you point blank, and kicked you squarely where the sun never shines.

Devil:

SEE?! It was a dirty trick! I hate that bitch.

Angel:

Oh, do calm down. Besides, the fact still stays that you pitted father against son.

Devil:

Bullshit. I did have a hand in it, but Jin wasn't exactly, "Oh, Daddy Dearest! How I love you so!" He hated his dad just as much as everyone else does.

Angel:

Now, that's not even true! Jun still cares deeply for Kazuya. And so did Jinpachi. And, even though they are in a bit of a tiff right now, I'm sure Jin loves his father.

Devil:

Bah! Wishful thinking, cream puff. Why can't you just get the fact that Kazuya is a huge bastard?!

Angel:

Ahh!! I admit he's a tad cruel, but you need to stop referring to him that way!

Devil:

The guy's got no redeemable qualities. It's ok to call him a bastard.

Angel:

Interesting. If he's got no redeemable qualities, then why do you take on his appearance a good majority of the time?

Devil:

(Gasp!) You . . . BITCH!! How dare you! He takes on my qualities! If he would've had his own, he would've looked like his dad.

Angel:

What? Are you saying you don't have any redeemable qualities if he looks like you but has no redeemable qualities himself?

Devil:

Ahh! Shut up, shut up! You just don't get me at all!

Angel:

And that's why I'm in Heaven and you're in Hell.

Devil:

Can't we just agree that Kazuya is a bastard and be done with it?

Angel:

No. Because he's not.

Devil:

Fine. At least I know one thing we can agree on.

Angel:

Huh? What's that?

Devil:

That Paul Phoenix's hair looks incredibly stupid 24/7.

Angel:

Sadly, it's true. I do agree with you.

Kazuya:

Would you two mind shutting the Hell up?! I'm trying to sleep, God damn it!!

Devil and Angel:

. . . Ok.

Kazuya:

Jesus Christ. Bunch of fucking retards.

Devil and Angel:

(Cry)

Heihachi:

What's wrong with you boy?! (Slaps Kazuya upside the head) I'm trying to sleep, dammit!

Lee:

Shut up, guys! I need my beauty rest!!

Jinpachi:

Don't you yell at my Grandson, son! (Slaps Heihachi upside the head) Punk!

Heihachi:

Shut up, Dad!

Jin:

All of you shut up.

Jun:

Oh Jin, that's not nice! But he's right. Everyone please be quiet and go to sleep.

Asuka:

Or I might just Awe-Inspiring Asuka your behinds!

Devil and Angel:

. . . Oi . . .

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The End

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A/N: Oh, that ended so off-color, hahaha! Sorry, I just felt like including everyone up to this point in the story since the chapter was so much shorter than usual. Don't worry, it'll never happen again! Well, I mean, Devil Jin's chapter may be kinda short, but I don't foresee the conversation style happening ever again.

Oh, and I know I keep ragging on Paul, but you know I love him! Well, maybe you didn't, but he's great. Really he is! And I severely contrasted the style in which Devil and Angel spoke. Yeah, I know, Angel was all proper and Devil talked like an angry white gansta, but it's all good, yo!

Still, I hope you all enjoyed it! I would really love to know what you think and reviews are always welcome!! Thanks to everyone who has supported this story and left me reviews! You're all so amazing!!!