a/n This is my first fan fic, please don't flame! On with the story! Authors thrive on reviews so pulls out tin can and beat up clothing Will work for reviews!

Give Naruto worms and hot sauce for ramen

Watch as he eats it, turns red, and looks down at the bowl

Repeatedly use Shikamaru as a human shield when he trys to kill you

Throw chicken feed on Sasuke

When he asks what your doing, tell him your feeding his hair

When he asks why, reply "Sasgay, your hair looks like a chicken's butt."

When he attacks you, use a substitution jutsu

But substitute Naruto

A still-ticked-about-the-ramen-thing Naruto

10.Then set their fan girls on them

11. Ask Gaara why he wears eyeliner, then throw water on him

12. When he growls out a why at you, tell him his eyeliner is running, and that his tattoo is washing off.

13. Watch as he pulls out his sand, then throw a doll at him.

14. A Sakura doll

15. Lee's Sakura doll

16. Watch as Gaara catches it, and out of nowhere an Asparagus attacks him for his doll back

17. Yea, it's Lee

18. Walk away slowly while hiding Lee's doll behind your back, when they start to fight

19. Ask Neji if he's wearing a wig

20. When he says no, cut it really short

21. Then pull the wig off

22. Marvel at how long and shiny his real hair is

23. Paint his nails blue

24. Tell Hinata that Neji stole her nail polish

25. Watch the catfight

26. Throw them both in the fan boy pit

27. Yes, Neji has fan boys

28. Somehow get Kakashi's book

29. Doodle in it while crossing out paragraphs with 'Adult Content'

30. Yes, you have to read it

31. Give him his book back

32. Mention a paragraph you enjoyed, while he eyes you suspiciously

33. Watch as he opens the book and cries

34. Stomp on it, and make him cry like a baby

35. Then burn it

36. Take him to the book store

37. Burn all the Icha-Icha Paradise books

38. Then burn Jiraiya, while screaming "No more perverted books!"

39. Tackle Sasuke, in front of Sakura

40. Scream "Billboard Brow and Chicken Butt Hair are looking for 'Believe It' Boy and Old Man Scarecrow!" while pushing Sasuke into Sakura

41. Naruto and Kakashi will hear this, and start chasing you along with Sasuke and Sakura

42. Run past Neji and Hinata, and for some reason Tenten is with Neji

43. They will start chasing you too

44. Run them all into the still fighting Gaara and Lee

45. Get some popcorn and watch the fight, but don't share it with Choji

46. They will suddenly stop fighting and leave, Shikamaru and Choji in tow


48. They all come back with Ino, Temari, Kankuro, Kibia, and Shino.

49. Squish Shino's bugs, feed Akamaru chocolate, and call Ino a dumb blond.

50. While what you said to Ino sinks in, play tea party with Kankuro's dolls, and fan yourself

51. With Temari's fan

52. Run when they try to kill you

53. When they corner you, pinch yourself, and everyone else. Try to explain that you were making sure this wasn't a dream.

54. Apologize. They won't buy it.

55. Run for your life, and pray to see your next birthday

The result:

You're in the Hospital and your nurse, Sakura, refuses to heal you.

You realize how you were so very stupid to listen to me. I pity you so much you dear, dear, fool. Or, as my friend Tiffany would say, You Foo!

A/n Thanks for reading! Now comes the fun part for me the reviews!