EDIT: Nov 7, 2006: Errr, I posted a Temporary Hiatus notice at my profile, along with an announcement. I'm currently in need of EnvyEd doujinshi scanlation. For details, please see my profile XDXD Thanks for the very favorable reviews for this oneshot! I'm glad that it wasn't as corny and un-funny as I thought :D

Prompt: 30kisses, kilohertz (it's in bold inside the ficcie XD)

Warnings: Erm –hides- yaoi, shounen-ai, implied naughtiness, crack-ish, weird sense of humor, OOCness. Please read and review, even if just to tell me that this is corny. After a couple of weeks/months of no practice in fanfic writing… I hope the quality is still okay :D

Reason behind this: I'm supposedly studying, but my friend suddenly said something photographic memory. And she said it, obliviously, as pornographic memory. Thanks to her, I had this idea that plagued me while I was trying to sleep last night -.-;;

It was only a week before the final exams—the period when the grade-conscious geeks started studying twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week; the period when the guilty slackers started attending the revision lectures, in hopes of their teachers accidentally giving away hints on exam questions; the period when everybody crammed five months' worth of studying into a couple of days.

It was the suggestion of the ever-kind Umino Iruka to the school principal for teachers to group students into study-peer groups, which would hopefully aid the students to prepare for their deadly examinations.

One such group, Team Seven, from second-year class A, was already seated on an empty classroom, waiting as patiently as they could for their lazy, perverted and always-late 'tutor'.

It was as though Hatake Kakashi was late on purpose; it was no secret to the entire school that leaving Uzumaki Naruto (blond, energetic, and cheerfully floating around the social pyramid as a innocent, mediocre person) and Uchiha Sasuke (sexy, broody, a bloody genius, rich and at the pinnacle of the social system) on the same room for a long time was bound to introduce chaos.

Even Haruno Sakura (pink-haired, smart, one of Sasuke's devoted worshippers) couldn't stand to listen to the boys' squabbles, which usually involved obnoxiously loud name-calling, vicious jabs, and painful punches.

Thankfully though (or maybe because Iruka-sensei threatened to castrate him today), Kakashi-sensei arrived only two hours late. Sakura's face brightened considerably at the appearance of their tutor, and she glanced hopefully at the still-bickering Sasuke and Naruto. Sometimes, she wished she could have that sort of… bond with her idol. Emerald eyes strayed to the snarl present on Naruto's lips. Then again, maybe not.

"All right, you two—stop flirting with each other, so that we can start studying," Kakashi said amiably, eyes curved in a half-arc, blatantly ignoring the duo's scandalized looks and Sakura's appalled gasp.

"The lesson for today…" Kakashi started, and the three settled down to listen and confirm the notes they doodled on the edges of their papers, brains trying to absorb all the knowledge like a dehydrated sponge.

More than a quarter of an hour has passed, and Kakashi was now detailing things about frequency measurements. "Okay, so, kilohertz (KHz) is equal to 1000 hertz, or 1000 cycles per second. This is the SI unit for measuring frequency. It was named after Heinrich Rudolf Hertz—some guy who probably was too bored with his life, and decided that being a nerd and studying electromagnetic radiation was cool—"

Kakashi ranted on with an amused chuckle, but his cramming lecture was disrupted by Sakura's raised hand.

"What is it, Sakura?"

"Ehh, Naruto—why are you not taking down notes?" It was surprising, but true. The blond's papers were horribly blank; only some of the required reading materials were printed out. Naruto was simply sitting there, listening to Kakashi's lecture, a frown of concentration on his tanned, fox-like face.

Kakashi turned to Iruka's favorite—no matter how much the brown-haired teacher denied it—student and cocked a questioning brow.

The blond blushed faintly, and placed a hand gingerly behind his neck, an act of mild embarrassment. The Uchiha seated beside him gazed at him with those piercing obsidian eyes, while Naruto pretended to be not flustered by the attention. "Oh, that? Don't worry, Sakura-chan," He started gleefully, waving away their confused glances.

"It's because I have pornographic memory!"

The room was eerily silent, but three pairs of eyes (or two-and-a-half, since Kakashi's mysterious mask covered half of his face) stared disbelievingly at Naruto. There was an odd, choking sound from Sasuke, but the blond looked unbelievably oblivious to the cause of such strange reactions from his groupmates.

Sakura looked like a cross between outrage and heartbreak, while Kakashi's lips were pulled into a bright smile, visible eye radiating intense glee. He never knew he could achieve it—and damn, Iruka would hate him for this—but he managed to corrupt Naruto!

"Ehh? What's the matter?" Naruto asked them, a quizzical look upon the boyish face. He peered close into Sasuke's face, which only managed to make him more confused, since, from his proximity, the Uchiha pressed two fingers close to his nose, as though preventing himself from having a nosebleed.

It wasn't that obvious, but the look on the prodigy's face suggested that his mind conjured of other ideas from Naruto's innocent mistake in pronunciation.

"Gah, you're weird," The blond declared, crossing his arms over his chest self-consciously. "I only said I had pornogra—"

He never got to finish his statement—which was undoubtedly another mistake—since he was forcibly dragged away by the deviously-sexy Uchiha, whose face now sported a predatory leer that mirrored Kakashi's expression.

Poor, poor Naruto. Even after the bout of erm, molestation that transpired, he was still oblivious to the reason behind it all.

"You're really weird, you know?" Naruto muttered into the sweaty skin of Sasuke's neck, words muffled, but still comprehensible for the black-haired teen.

Sasuke's voice sounded tired, but pleased. "How so?"

"You just dragged me out of the room! In front of Sakura-chan and that pervert teacher! She'll kill me for this!" Naruto protested, already fearing the wrath of Sakura and the forces of Sasuke's fangirls.

There was a short pause. "And I never got to ask why you were all so weird. I mean, all I said was that I had por—"

Once again, Naruto never got to finish his statement, as the perverted gleam returned to Sasuke's eyes. After all, Sasuke just wanted to know if Naruto really had pornographic memory.


…Don't kill me for this XD;;;; Short, only 937 words, but damn it, it was fun to write XDXD I can just imagine Naruto's innocent, confused look.

I'm going to do an EnvyEd (and maybe SetoYami and KaiTy, too) version of this. If they're OOC… well, that's why I put them in AU. Mwahaha. Please review! XD