Who am I?

Disclaimer: I don't own the show Supernatural or the characters I just like to play with Sam and Dean and then send them home again.

Author's Note: This is the last chapter of Who am I? I am planning a sequel at the moment and will have it up in as soon as I can. It will be set a little down the track and will be about the rescue of the little girl and Sam finally regaining his own identity.


The ragtag rescue team watched the farmhouse with unrelenting determination, Caleb's recon had been successful they now knew where Sam was and that was the main thing. But they still had to get past the demonic guards.

'Okay boys you're gonna have to move fast, Dean you sure you're up to this son?' Bobby stared hard at the oldest Winchester boy.

'Yeah Bobby, I'm fine.' Dean declared though silently he wondered if it was more for his own benefit than Bobby's. 'What are you thinking Bobby?'

'Simple you two get in the back of the truck, and I'm gonna just drive straight in.'

'Just drive? Bobby?'

'Don't give me that look Dean Winchester, you just concentrate on getting your brother outta there, I'm gonna drive straight through the defences hoping to take em by surprise and I'll hold em off as long as I can but you two get Sam and get back to the truck that's it, we take care of the demon another day.' Bobby glared at Dean, knowing damn well, what the young man was thinking, 'no revenge today Dean just a snatch and grab rescue.'

'We do this for Sam.' Caleb said also fixing his stare on Dean, who looked at both of the other men and then conceded to their demands, knowing that none of them were physically and or mentally able to face the demon this day.

'For Sam.' Dean whispered hoarsely, 'let's do it.'

Bobby started the engine and sat revving it for a few minutes, his foot fixed firmly on the brake as he let the truck roar to life, his gaze drifted to the rear of the vehicle where Caleb and Dean hid ready to go. Releasing his breath in time with the brake Bobby floored the truck and started to hurtle towards the demon's compound.

Skidding to a stop in a cloud of dust and stones Bobby opened fire randomly giving cover for Caleb and Dean to make a dash for the building where Sam was.

'I'm coming baby brother.' Dean whispered as he shot a guard at close range with the rock salt loaded rifle.


'What was that?' the doctor mused as he finished examining Sam again, as the sound of gun fire echoed through the building.

'Dean's coming.' Sam said quietly, a solemn look on his face.

'Sam?' the doctor asked staring at his patient confused, Sam couldn't remember his own name but he could remember his brother?

'Don't worry doc, it's all going to be okay now.' Sam said smiling up at the other man, the innocent look and blank eyes gone; in their stead was a look of sheer faith and determination, his green eyes shining with hope. 'Dean's here.'

'Sam do you remember who you are?'

'Sam, that's what you call me.'

'Dean? Who is Dean?'

'My saviour.' Sam said with a wider smile the innocence returning to his face.

Loud voices came from the other side of the door and Sam's smile grew wider, placidly he lay there watching and waiting for his saviour to rescue him. Doctor Mac stared down at Sam in shock, either the young man was indeed one hell of an actor or he had really lost his mind as well as his memories.

'See doc Dean's coming.' Sam exclaimed happily. 'Deanie's on his way.'

The door shattered into pieces and two bloodied but determined looking young men burst through, 'Sammy?' one with shorter spiked dark blond hair and emerald green eyes pushed past the doctor and dropped to his knees next to the bed, his fingers tracing down the side of Sam's face.

'You Dean?' the doctor asked trying to regain some semblance of professional composure.

'Yeah ... you Doctor Mac?' Dean asked gruffly not taking his eyes off Sam.

'Hey Deanie.' Sam said smiling brightly, his eyes shining with complete innocence. 'I knew you come.'

'Hey Sammy ... Doc is he right to go?'

'I ah don't recommend Sam try to walk at the moment, his paralysis is still a problem, and he has been slipping in and out of a catatonic state.'

'What else Doc?' Caleb demanded watching the man closely, 'can we trust you?'

'I assure you that I have only had Sam's best interests in mind, the Master has been torturing him with mind games more than physical pain although he has done that as well. Sam has slipped from being a small child to an adult to someone who has no memories at all.'

'Come on Sammy, we gotta get you outta here.' Dean said ignoring his own injuries and the looks of concern on the other men; he slipped his arm under Sam's knees and the other cupped around his back. With some difficulty, he managed to lift Sam, surprised at how light his brother was now, and cradled him against his chest.

'Let's get going ... Doc you coming with us or what?'

'Coming.' Doctor Mac said not willing to stay and face the Master on his own.

With Caleb taking the lead and the doctor last they made their way back to Bobby's truck. The older man heaved a heavy sigh of relief when he saw Dean staggering out with Sam curled in his arms. A look of immediate distrust and recognition flashed over his face when he saw the so-called doctor following them. He waited for Dean to slide Sam into the truck and climb in next to him before he spoke. 'Dean he aint coming with us.'

'Who Bobby?'

'That so-called doctor.' Bobby spat the words out like poison, 'he aint coming.'

'Bobby?' Doctor Mac stopped suddenly and stared at the driver of the truck, 'Is that you?'

'Get away now Tom and no one will be hurt.'

'Please Bobby I – I just want to make sure that Sam's ...'

'What? That he can't remember anything?' Bobby snarled aiming his rifle at the doctor, 'turn and run Tom and never look back.'

'You're making a mistake Bobby.'

'Now Tom.'

The doctor looked at Dean with an imploring stare but Dean never doubted Bobby and told the doctor to leave now before Bobby did fill him with shot. Caleb took his position in the back of the truck and yelled for them to get going.

Bobby put the truck into gear and floored it out of the farm, knowing that the escape was a little too easy but his only thought was getting Sam away from his demonic captors. He risked a glance at the youngest Winchester, and his breath caught in his throat. The trusting look in Sam's eyes made him cringe, he had seen Sam go through a lot but this was ... unsettling.

Carefully they carried Sam into Bobby's house, while Caleb checked the area to make sure that no one followed them. Propped up on Bobby's sofa Sam looked peaceful and at least pain free, but it was that unwavering, childlike innocence that got both Bobby and Dean.

'Don't leave Deanie.' Sam whispered clutching Dean's hand desperately with his good hand. 'Don't leave me.'

'Not going anywhere Sammy.' Dean replied his voice tinged with exhaustion and sadness.

'Where ... where are we?'

Bobby's house.'

'Bobby?' Sam frowned as he tried to remember Bobby, 'cars?'

'Yeah he has lots of wrecked cars.' Dean said giving Sam an encouraging smile.

Sam glanced up at the older man hovering in the background, raising a shaking finger he pointed him out, 'Bobby?'

'In the flesh Sam.' Bobby grinned and then ducked his head and went to rustle up some food for them.

'Dean?' Sam looked up at Dean worriedly, 'what's wrong Dean?'

'Nothing Sam ... just glad you're home.'

'Pain? You in pain?' Sam asked though it sounded more like a statement.


'No pain.' Sam insisted his hand resting on the bullet wound site, 'pain here.'

'Sam how?'

'You hot.' Sam persisted in assessing his older brother's condition. 'You got fever.'

'Just tired, Sammy how about we take a look at you.'

'Sammy hurt too Deanie.'

'Sam?' Dean focused on Sam's face a look of panic on his own, 'Sam you okay?'

Sam shook his head and winced, 'yeah just things are jumbled in here.' Sam hit the side of his head frustrated. 'What's wrong with me Dean?'

'The freak messed with your mind Sammy but we're gonna get you better.'

'Why can't my arm and leg move?' Sam asked prodding his numb arm with his good hand. 'Feels funny.'

'Hey, hey no poking Sammy, the feeling will come back.' Dean chided him gently.

'Deanie ... where's daddy?' Sam yawned and settled back against the cushions his eyes drifting shut, 'don' wanna stay in hos'tal Deanie.' He mumbled.

'Sh just go to sleep Sammy, it's gonna be a lot better soon.' Dean said soothingly, brushing his brother's fringe out of his eyes, 'I promise.'

'Hmm okkies Deanie.' Sam mumbled as sleep finally claimed him. Dean sat watching his brother sleep, all the lines of pain and confusion gone from his face, he looked angelic, and so innocent falling into a deeper relaxed sleep. His long fingers curled around Dean's hand linking the two brothers once again. Yawning Dean slid to the floor next to the couch and rested his head against Sam's side, their hands still together and let the sleep fairies come to visit him. Dean's eyes snapped open 'dream fairies? What the?' he couldn't believe that was what drifted through his mind as he settled back and dropped into a dreamless sleep.

Sam's screams echoed through the quiet house waking all of the inhabitants, except himself. Caleb and Bobby came thundering downstairs with guns drawn when they found Dean trying to rouse Sam from the grip of his night terrors.

'What the fuck?' Bobby breathed lowering his gun the same time as Caleb. 'Is he alright?'

'Nightmares, I think he's dreaming ... he screamed out motorbike and then chains and then he...'

'Woke the whole countryside.' Caleb finished for Dean, 'shame we can't raise that old bastard and drag him behind a motorbike before salting and burning him again.'

'Dean?' Sam's sob made his brother turn back to face him, tears ran down Sam's flushed cheeks, 'why Dean? What did I do to him?'

'Nothing Sammy you did nothing to him, he was just a crazy old bastard.' Dean said thickly, his own emotions nearing the surface.

'He shot you.' Sam cried his fingers grasping at Dean's shirt, 'he shot you coz of me.'

'Hey Sammy, I'm fine see I'm here and I'm fine.'

'And, and he hurt Bobby.' Sam turned his teary stare up at the hunter with his leg still encased in a heavy cast.

'Sam we're all going to be alright and so will you be.' Bobby said as gently as he could, 'he can't hurt anyone anymore.'

'He, he's dead?' Sam whimpered, 'my fault.'

'No Sam don't you dare say that,' Dean said slightly harsher than he intended seeing the look form on Sam's face, 'you were nothing but the victim in all of this. That old bastard got what he deserved; he can't hurt anyone ever again.'


'Yeah Sammy?'

'The Demon he – he threatened to take my memory again and make me like him.' Sam whispered the last bit, 'I don't want to be like him.'

'You're not ever gonna turn into anything like him Sammy I promise.'

'He – he took the little girl.'

'What little girl?' Dean asked a sinking feeling formed in the pit of his stomach.

'The little girl from the playground, from my vision he used me to find her.' Sam muttered as his eyes slid shut and he fell into a dreamless sleep.


Bobby strode through the door with a wide grin on his face and his leg cast free. 'Good as new.' He declared to his semi-permanent visitors, over the last few weeks he has become used to having the boys with him, a ready made family for the lonely hunter although when their bickering got out of control he craved to be on his own again.

'So you can really kick Dean's ass now?' Sam quipped looking up from his computer.

'Oh you are so dead now Samuel.' Dean barked back teasingly. He was so happy to see Sam looking and sounding stronger; although, still unable to move properly and had to rely on the wheelchair to get around, he was improving every day.

Sam chuckled softly and then returned his attention back to the computer screen in front of him. Chewing his lower lip he scrolled through the information at a blurring speed.

Curious to know what has his brother so intrigued Dean got up and went to stand behind Sam, his breath catching when he saw the screen. 'Sammy what do you think?'

'I have to find her Dean.' Sam said refusing to meet his brother's glare. 'It's my fault he has her and there is nothing you can say or do to change my mind.'

'It's probably too late Sammy.'

'No, no I won't believe that, Dean she was only four years old.' Sam snapped frustrated with his limited movement and recurring memories Sam lashed out at his brother. 'I saw her in a room with no door but really bright light, she was curled up into a ball trying to protect her eyes and crying for her mommy, I can't shut my eyes without seeing her.'

'Sammy, you're barely well enough to look after yourself let alone to find a missing little girl. As much as I want to help her too, I have to help you first.'

'Dean...' Sam started then he winced and pinched the bridge of his nose, 'argh Dean I ...'

'Sammy? What is it? Vision?'

'Dean argh, hurts ... hurts my head Deanie.' Sam whimpered, throwing his good arm around his sibling's waist he pushed his face in against Dean, 'don't want it to hurt anymore.'

'Sh it's okay Sammy it's okay.' Dean said soothingly as he rubbed circles on his brother's back, worried for Sam's fragile sanity still. Whenever he had a bad dream or a vision, he would revert to a childlike Sammy.

'Don't leave me Deanie.' Sam cried tightening his grip on his brother's shirt.

'Hey Sammy not going anywhere but you're squeezing a bit hard there dude.'

'Sorry.' Sam sniffled and pulled away slightly, 'the little girl's mommy is having her baby and the – the demon is there an' Doc Mac.' Sam stared up at Dean, his eyes filled with his deep seated misery. 'The doc lied to me didn't he Deanie?'

'No Sammy, it was just that Bobby knew him and they don't like each other so it was better that the doctor didn't come with us.' Dean explained praying that Sam didn't see through the transparency of his white lie.

'Why the doctor with the demon still, if he didn't want to be there anymore?' Sam persisted.

'Not sure Sammy, but I think you have had enough time on the computer, how about we go and get some lunch?'

'Sure.' Sam nodded his head but made no move to shift away from the table, instead Dean went around to the handles and pushed Sam's wheelchair away and out to the kitchen, worried that his brother was sliding backwards again.

'So whatcha feel like Sam?'

'Don't care, you pick Deanie.'

'Okay how about a good old BLT?'

'What's BLT?'

'Ha oh you are so in for a treat Sammy,' Dean grinned as he parked Sam's chair at the kitchen table and went about to get the ingredients he needed for their sandwiches.


'Yeah Sammy?'

'I'm sorry...'

'For what?'

'For being so silly,' Sam sighed, 'I – I try really hard to remember everything and to be Sam.'

'I know dude and I am really proud of you.'

'What – what if I don't get better?'

'Sammy,' Dean started turning to face his brother stopping himself when he saw the look on Sam's face. A look of complete desolation. 'Sammy, you have had a lot of really bad things happen to you, by other people and creatures. Your body needs time to heal and so does your mind and memories. It's okay to slide backwards sometimes and remember being a little kid. It will all come back just like your using your arm and leg.'

'Do I smell bacon cooking?' Bobby asked coming in from outside, 'let me guess BLTs?'

'Yep.' Sammy grinned up at the man, 'Dean's making them.'

'Sounds good to me, I'll just go wash up.'

'Caleb gonna join us?'

'No Sammy remember ... Caleb has gone on a hunt and will be back in a week.' Bobby reminded him as gently as he could wary of how quickly Sam could go into an emotional meltdown.

'Oh yeah ... I remember.' Sam rubbed at his eyes tiredly, 'might go lie down for a while.'

'You okay Sammy?' Dean asked dropping the fork he hurried straight to his brother's side; Bobby silently moved to take over the cooking.

'Just tired,' Sam gave Dean a wan grin, 'need a nap.'

'Okay but when lunch is ready I am going to come and get you.'

'Deal.' Sam nodded stifling a yawn he let Dean wheel him into the living room and then help him onto the couch.

'I'll just be in the kitchen okay Sammy?'

'No probs Dean thank you.' Sam said between yawns, 'just need a nap.'


Dean sank into a kitchen chair and put his arms on the table resting his head on them, he felt so old all of a sudden.

'He is going to get better Dean, he is each day.'

'I know Bobby, but why him? Why Sammy? He just seems to be a magnet for trouble.'

'Just the way of things son nothing you can do about it but be there when he needs you.'

'Fuck it Bobby I just want my Sam back, sometimes I dread talking to him coz I don't know which one is going to come out.'


'Sorry I didn't mean the way it sounded ... geeze Bobby what kind of brother am I?'

'A human one.' Bobby said laying a comforting hand on Dean's shoulder, 'can't expect nothing more Dean, you're not superhuman.'

Sam lay back with his eyes closed and listened to the conversation in the next room, Dean had left the door open to keep an eye on Sam, and it allowed him to hear everything said.

Tears scalded his eyes as the guilt rose exponentially; he didn't want Dean to be so upset anymore. Sleep now gone from his thoughts he turned his head to stare at the wheelchair by the end of the couch. If he could get himself into it and prove that he could look after himself then Dean wouldn't have to worry anymore.

Dean could go hunting with Caleb and not have to worry about him, with that thought in his mind Sam carefully pulled himself up with his good hand gripping the back of the couch, once upright he waited for the buzzing to ease in his ears before he pushed his numb leg off the seat. Sitting on the edge of the cushion Sam took a deep breath and reached over to the chair.


Dean's head shot up when he heard the crashing sound coming from the living room, closely followed by Bobby, they found Sam lying on his side on the floor the wheelchair tipped over, and a small end table crushed under it.

'Sammy?' Dean breathed rushing to help his brother up.

'No Dean I can do it.' Sam snapped embarrassed he pushed Dean's hand away and awkwardly twisting he managed to get a grip of the seat and pull himself up to a seated position on the floor his paralysed leg splayed at an awkward angle and his chest heaving with the effort.

'Sammy?' Dean tried to help his brother but was this time shoved away. 'What the freaking hell is wrong with you?'

'No Dean, I can do this, you don't have to worry bout me.' Sam panted, 'just gotta rest.'

'Stupid stubborn idiot.' Dean snapped, 'you could've hurt yourself.'

'But I didn't.'


'Jerk.' Sam grinned up at his brother and held out his good hand, 'okay you can help me this time, and dunno what I am sitting on.'

'Oh funny Sam now you are attacking my housekeeping?' Bobby muttered righting the chair he stared down at the small table now lying in shattered pieces. 'And a furniture wrecker.'

'Sorry Bobby really.' Sam said the humour leaving his voice.

'No worries Sam, didn't like it anyway.' Bobby lifted his head wearing a wide grin, 'you did me a favour.'

'Dean, Bobby I ah thanks.' Sam said dipping his gaze to fix on a spot on the floor, his cheeks flaming.

A screech of tires made the three men stare at each other in silent horror 'could be Caleb.' Bobby said finally breaking the sudden quiet.

'Bobby? Dean? You guys in here?' Caleb called sprinting into the house and colliding with Bobby.

'Damn it Cal slow down son before you have a coronary.'

'The demon ... he's back.' Cal panted as he collapsed against Bobby, 'that Doc Mac is with ...'

'Caleb?' Bobby called out frantically checking the younger man for injuries but found none. 'Must just be sheer exhaustion.' Bobby looked up at Dean and then shifted his gaze to Sam, 'you boys alright?'

'We're going to be.' Sam said softly, 'and we'll be ready for him won't we Dean.'

'You bet Sam, we're in this all the way.' Dean said placing a comforting hand on Sam's good arm and squeezing it slightly. 'All the way.'