Title: Humping

Rating: T

Genre: Humor

Summary: A pointless fic that explains why Mr. Game & Watch is a very dirty man. Warning: Mr. Game & Watch Bashing! I wrote this because I haven't inserted any new fics for a while.


It was the third day since Master Hand opened the Smasher Mansion, and Princess Peach was already beat. After losing to both DK and Samus, she wasn't sure if she could win the next battle.

Peach took a sip of her coffee and ran her fingers through he golden hair as she thought, 'I wonder how tough my next opponent is?'

Suddenly, she heard a voice say,

"Ho ho! Humpin' the bitch!"

Peach looked down at her leg and saw Mr. Game & Watch "affectionately" rubbing against her. Peach let out a shriek and smashed the sole of her shoe against the 2-D man's face, sending him spiraling into the wall.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Peach cried, her face red. Mr. Game & Watch shook some dust off his head and replied, "You know we can do it doggy style, so we can watch…X-Files!"

"Are you quoting 'Bad Touch'?" asked the blond princess. GAW just nodded and started running at Peach.

Peach clenched her teeth and quickly dodged GAW before he could smack his head against her breasts. Peach pulled out a golf club from nowhere and thought, 'This…asshole is trying to rape me!'

GAW ran at Peach again, but he hit head-first against a metal club. "TAKE THAT, YOU FREAKIN' BASTARD!!!" Peach shouted as she pounded the living day lights out of Mr. Game & Watch.

Roy walked in with a donut and began to say, "Hey, Peach, I brought you-" but stopped when he saw Peach going all homicidal. Without another word, Roy put the donut on a table and left the room.

When it was all over, GAW was nothing but a puddle of black blood on the floor. Peach brushed herself off and walked away, wondering what Mario was up to…

A/N: Personally, I like Mr. Game & Watch. This fic was just for fun.