Archangel Investigations: Preview
by Creedog VanDrey

Category: Smallville
Genre: Action/Adventure, Humor
Rating: TV-PG
Language: English
Summery: The Champions of Kal-El decide to make use of their power by opening a detective agency.
Spoilers: Takes place in a slightly AU universe breaking off just before the end of Season 5, and intersecting with the BuffyVerse. Also, you may want to read "The Champions of Kal-El."

Director's Note: So, the network has greenlighted my series, Archangel Investigations, a continuation of my movie, The Champions of Kal-El, a spinoff of the popular Smallville series. These are the six preview commercials.

Kal-El was my distant ancestor. He was a prince, the second Bethgar of the united Urrika continent. He was also the first Kryptonian to be born into the House of El. Knowing that our beloved planet would not last long after my son was born, I named him after Kal, knowing that he too would start a new era, though on a different planet.

But this is not my son's story. This is the story of the first Kal-El. His father, Erok, was appointed Bethgar of the newly reunited state of Urrika after marrying Milia, the daughter of Uved, the chief of the northern Urrikan territories. Hoping to teach his son Kal autonomy, Erok-El sent him to a nearby solar system which housed a species genetically similar to ours, but about ten-thousand years less evolved. Back then, Kryptonians thought nothing of the primitive Terrans. Erok naturally assumed that Kal-El would quickly conquer the planet, much like Erok had done to the divided nation of Urrika, but he was proven wrong.

Almost forty years later, Kal-El returned from Earth shortly after his wife had died. Erok refused to call her that, preferring the term "concubine." You see, Kryptonian culture had a marked distinction between life-bonding and marriage-bonding. Life-bonding is for procreation, formed by two people with a powerful socioemotional bond. Marriage-bonding is a strictly legal tie, a way to align families and pair complementary occupations, completely analogous to the merging of two companies. It appeared Kal-El had both life-bonded and marriage-bonded (within Earth law, at least) to the woman he called Loral. Oh, the controversy it caused. How do I know this? Well, for one, I married a historian with the Kryptonian Space Exploration Association, who also happened to be my life-partner. Kal-El turned out to be a trendsetter. I too sent my own son to Earth. Because of the current Earth customs, he'll likely end up marrying his life-partner, too.

But I digress. Kal-El forged strong bonds with several Terrans, and so powerful were the connections that the High Science Council could not ignore its potency. So, in his honor, they formed the Champions of Kal-El, a six-member team that could be used to spread truth and justice throughout the universe should it ever be required in extreme cases. Such respect did we have that we even used the Terran epithets.

Not too long ago, my son Kal-El joined together with five Terrans to recreate the Champions of Kal-El. They have done immeasurably good in the universe, as he picked his companions well. Well, I had doubts about one of them, but she turned out okay. My son is wiser than I anticipated.

Naman the Brave would be the leader of this team. He was to be a warrior with limitless courage and unshakeable morals. Anyone who bore his name in spirit would inherit all the powers of Kryptonian under a yellow sun.

Sageeth the Strong would be his ever-present adversary. He will be given powers: the ability to mentally slow down his perception of time and greatly increased stamina, endurance, and rate of healing.

The woman was beautiful. They all were. Lex had long grown accustomed to the fact that everyone had a price. If he paid enough, he would have a more talented and more beautiful fencing instructor than last year. Truth be told, there was a secret why he performed so well. After the adventure on Jorja, he retained his superhuman abilities. His eyes caught every tilt of his opponent's spine, every twist of her foot, allowing him to predict the arc of her next strike within what seemed to him to be only a few seconds. In practice, he had indomitable reflexes. And it went a long way to impress the instructor. It would be no surprise that she would accept his invitation to dinner. It would be no surprise that she would wear something provocative. If she didn't, well, perhaps she'd be getting a present in the mail from an anonymous source. It was power, which no one who knew Lex would be surprised that he wanted.

Dayak the Loyal would be Naman's ever-devoted protector. He would be given the power to wield any weapon with expert skill.

Pete had to admit it to himself; as much as he'd like to say he went pre-law to please his mother, he couldn't help but enjoy the courses… in the long run. Tonight, he was working on a seven-page paper detailing the controversy of corporate neglect lawsuits in the case where the produce was intentionally dangerous. And he was bored out of his skull. So, he was twirling around a pair of scissors, catching them blindly as he tossed them from hand to hand. Momentarily distracted, he missed them with his hand, but was able to catch them in the crook of his toes, where he tossed them back to his hand and throwing them in the thick piece of corkboard, which already had half a dozen pens imbedded in it. Needing a moment to think, he picked up some free weights and started lifting as he talked out his argument to himself.

Loral the Faithful would be Naman's ever-true life-partner. She must be Naman's complement, and her abilities would be mental: clairvoyance, empathy, and visual precognition.

All she wanted was a new scanner, a big one for copying news pages and large photographs. So, she entered in the Planet's date auction. And that was how she ended up at an upscale Thai restaurant with a 29-year-old sports editor, on a Friday night, when she would usually be going out to a movie with Clark, Lois, or Lana. Truth be told, he wasn't a bad guy. He was tall, almost six foot (shorter than Clark), with thick black hair (curlier and greasier than Clark's), a decent smile (though no comparison to Clark's), and glasses (which would look a lot better on Clark). If only he would button the second-to-top button so she wouldn't have to see so much of his chest hair (of which Clark had none). He mentioned that he loved shellfish. The last shipment of shellfish to this restaurant had been transported in a malfunctioning freezer truck, Chloe knew preternaturally. She also knew that her date had had dirty thoughts about their waitress, though the casual smile he had given her saying thank-you would have fooled anyone else. He mentioned an intern who had worked with him on his last project and if Chloe knew her. She did. She also knew that he had taken her out Wednesday night to celebrate their two-month anniversary. And that they'd spent the night at her place. And that they had another date planned this coming Sunday. So, Chloe excused herself to the restroom, noting that her date was too preoccupied with the woman one table over to notice she'd taken her purse and was walking to the entrance. On the way out, she mentioned to their waitress that her date loved Goong Gah Tee-em, a garlic shrimp dish, and that she should try to sell him on it.

Myora the Wise would be Naman's guide and confidante. As a gift for his wisdom, he will transcend the physical, giving him the ability of flight and invisibility.

Lois had a figure that looked good in a cocktail dress, very good. And she knew when and how to use her looks. And she knew, as she strode to a Department of Education meeting with Sen. Martha Kent, that now was not one of those times. So, she was dressed her most austere pant suit, which did a remarkable job of hiding her curves. But she also had one more trick up her sleeve. For anyone who cared to look, and there were a few eyes that were caught by the senator's coppery locks, Martha Kent was walking alone. Lois spent the majority of the meeting floating just above the heads of the various senators, trying to catch pieces of hidden conversations and reading the notes the various politicians were making on their copies of the new teacher compensation bill. True, this kind of inside information was an unfair advantage for the representative of District 11, but what Martha Kent didn't know her chief of staff was doing couldn't hurt her. Plus, since Martha had pulled some strings to get Lois enrolled in the long-distance degree program with Metropolis University, it was the least Lois could do in return. Noting that Jefferson Pierce, from the all-important District 6, was scribbling on his copy of the bill, Lois sidled over.

Rayen the Fair would be Naman's friend. She should have a love and an understanding with all creatures, who would listen to her without objection.

Lana entered the main stables of the Metropolis Equestrian Center with the brown-coated Tiramisu in tow. The gentle mare obediently slipped into her stall and turned around for some affection, which Lana freely gave. Just as she was reaching for a brush, someone on the other end of the stable called, "Watch out!" Lana turned to see a large white mare rushing down the aisle. Lana pulled herself back to the edge of the stalls, out of the horse's way, but called out, authoritatively, "Hey, hold it!" About ten feet away, the horse stalled and began bucking wildly in place. Still Lana called to it, as if it were a small child, "What's up? You get spooked? Calm down already." The horse stopped bucking, but still paced restlessly. Lana continued to shush the horse, telling it, "I don't know what you're thinking, but you're in no danger here." The horse butted Lana affectionately, who, because of her size, had to take a few steps back, but did extend her hand to pet the horse, who let her. A ranch hand ran up, calling her a regular horse whisperer. Lana replied, "Eh, horses are smarter than you think. Just use the tone of voice that you mean with them, and they'll get the picture." The man still seemed flabbergasted—the horse, ironically named Eirene after the Greek goddess of peace, was a troubled and unstable horse—so Lana reassured the hand. He seemed to accept her point of view very easily.

After their first adventure, I purged the memories of those three that did not know Kal-El's secret, but as a gift for their loyalty, I allowed the one he calls Chloe and the one he calls Pete to retain their memories. Though, only a few months past before the Groosalugg, an exiled Pylean Champion came to me, informing me of another mission that would require the efforts of the Champions of Kal-El. So, I had my son bring back his companions for this second mission, this time allowing the memories of all to remain intact, including the stowaway, as all showed devotion to my son. It is my hope that they will continue to carry out their mission, as dictated by the Code of Champions.

Director's Commentary: Okay, the network has only approved us for a few episodes, so we'll be playing the entire series by ear. I've got half a dozen scripts written or mostly written, and we'll be playing as long as we're allowed.

Okay, I'd like to thank the cast for giving of their time and energy for these previews. Thanks to Terrence Stamp for his voice. Jor-El has never sounded so good. Tom Welling reprised his role as "Kal-El the First" from the movie. "Erok-El" was portrayed by David Warner. (Ten points to whoever realizes why this is significant.) Lex's fencing coach was portrayed by Peta Wilson. Ted Raimi, who many of you know as Joxer, played Chloe's date.

Honestly, I'm kind of mad at the casting department (her name is Alexis) for hiring all these wonderful actor for these measly bit parts. She assures me she'll get them to come back.

(Sonriso) - Chloe, my autumn flower! I will save you from this scumball!

©2006, 2007 Godeerc VanDrey Enterprises, Inc. Created Wednesday, November 1, 2006. Updated Sunday, May 6, 2007.