Author's Note: This is another random idea that popped into my head. If you liked "A Few Minor Details" and "The Limit," this is in the same vein…
"Kagome…I need to tell you something," Inuyasha said nervously, reaching out and fiddling with a strand of her hair. "Ooh—your hair feels really silky today. Are you using a new conditioner?"
Kagome was slightly taken aback. "Um…no, just the usual. But…wasn't there something you wanted to tell me?"
He switched from playing with her hair to absentmindedly straightening her collar, nibbling his lower lip as he stalled for time. Finally he released a deep sigh, and one of his hands found Kagome's, his fingers lacing with hers. "I don't know how to tell you this…"
"Oh god," she breathed, tears springing to her eyes, "you're leaving me, aren't you…"
"Well…" he waffled, and her worst fears were confirmed.
"Oh my god. I mean, I always knew you loved Kikyo, but—"
"Kikyo? Oh no, no, don't be silly sweetie—I'm not running off with Kikyo."
"You're…you're not?" Sweetie…?
"Of course not. I got over that bitch ages ago. What I'm trying to tell you is…I'm gay."
"You're…gay?" She blinked. And then she blinked again.
He nodded. "Kouga and I have had a little thing on the side for almost a year now, and I finally decided I just can't live a lie anymore. We're going to go herd sheep on this mountain he told me about…'Brokeback,' I think he said it was called…"
"Wait, wait, wait, back up a sec—you're sleeping with Kouga?"
"Yep. You know this is such a cute top, hon—you should wear it more often…"
"But…but you were in love with Kikyo…and you and I have always been…and you get jealous as hell when anyone even comes near me…and, well…Inuyasha, you're about the straightest guy I've ever met in my entire life. I just don't get it."
"I know…but it sure makes for a hell of a kinky twist, doesn't it? Well anyway, I'm off to go sodomize Wolf-breath. We're thinking we might have a three-way with Sesshy later…"
"Yeah. I can think of about a million things I wanna do with that fluffy thing he wears. It's gonna be hot…"
A/N: I just couldn't resist this one. I'm not a yaoi fan myself, not because I'm a homophobe (I'm in musical theatre, so I know more gay guys than straight ones… —grin—), but because I hate the conventions of the genre (and let's face it, it's just not my thing…). Turning a straight character into a gay character is just, well…weird. It's like writing Inuyasha as a woman—he's just not a woman. It's a biological fact. And what's with the yaoi convention of gay men suddenly becoming woman-haters? Based on my own personal experiences, that's about as far from the truth as you can get…but I digress.
(—sigh—) Anyway, when this little idea popped into my head, I just had to write it down. And yes, the title is an intentional misspelling of "yaoi"… (—grin—)