Liz100193, jp5412, Maisy13, crashcart, anniehiltner, EmyTheGreat, maricejayo, BonnieAW, KewlKid, nick fan, LielieS, MYSTICAL PANTHER, Print Dust, Jenny70529, odeepblue, luv0817, Hamlets-pirate, anniehiltner, Melody, sara fan, Chione of the Nile, stareagle, csiluver123, Mingsmommy, luv0817, ScienceStar, littlemissliketofight, Paige Halliwell-Matthews, ma-name-is-nikki, CHRISCARTER, Tadpole24 (Em, you rock and we all know math is the devil!), Invisible Evidence (Rosie, the Spork shall one day fall!), jordanx3greggo (oh, Jersey, what can I say?!)----I would like to thank you all! If it weren't for the constant kicks in the ass, I never would've went through with anything past chapter one. The reviews were great and kept me laughing!
Pure shock- no, horror crossed Catherine's face as the words left Sara's mouth. Grissom simply gave Sara's knee a squeeze under the table in a feeble and unsuccessful attempt to keep from laughing his ass off. Warrick's fork stopped halfway to his mouth that now hung open wide enough to put the Grand Canyon to shame. Nick spit his mouthful of beer out in the classic comical way and turned to pat Greg hard on the back a couple of times since he was choking a bit on his food. Sara hid a cringe at the most ignorant question she could have come up with to sit with a decently blank look on her face as though the question were asked as simply as 'How are you today Catherine?'
Nick wiped his mouth, Grissom stopped laughing and Greg stopped coughing, but Catherine and Warrick remained as they were. Sara, seeing that she wasn't going to get a response soon, not that she was really expecting one anyway, turned to Greg. "Are you going to be alright, Greg?" she raised an eyebrow at him.
"Uh…" was all he could gasp out. Even though he wasn't still choking, it didn't mean he wasn't still in shock from that question. Everyone knew that Sara was a –how do you say it- ballsy person, but damn what a question! He looked at Catherine and at Warrick. Both had eyes as big as the plates that held their food and neither had looked at each other –understandable of course. Neither had said anything so far, kind of hard to say anything when your jaw is sitting on the table in front of you.
"You still choking?" she asked.
"I…uh…what?" he honestly had no idea what was going on. Thanksgiving Day for Greg had been completely screwed so far. Maybe he should just be quiet, not that he could complete a sentence right now anyway.
"F- I…f-fine," he stumbled, but got it out finally.
Nick leaned over to Catherine and whispered since Warrick was on the other side of her "Catherine? Catherine you….you should really consider closing your mouth. I know you were mid sentence and everything but you still got a bit of food in your mouth. I just thought with Warrick and everything…embarrassing or whatever..." he drifted off near the end.
Catherine snapped out of her horror induced shock, "What did you just say?"
"You got a bit of food in yo-"
"No, Nick! What the hell did you just say?!" Catherine yelled pointing at Sara, succeeding in finally snapping Warrick out of his state of astonishment.
"I…well, I…Grissom?" Sara turned towards Grissom in a silent search of some help. In all of her brilliance, out of everything floating around in her head at that particular moment in time, why in the hell was that the one dazzling thing that just came a-flowin' right out of her mouth?
Grissom stared at her vacantly. Just what the hell was he supposed to do?! Sure a good man should defend his fiancée but hey, she just dug a big ass conversation death-hole all by herself. He didn't even hand her the shovel to dig with, so why the hell was she turning to him for help against Catherine Willows, the one woman besides Sara that he truly feared?
'Oh Sweet Jesus, what did she just do?…Fear going to work…fear coming home from work…You had better weigh your options, old man, and you had better weigh them carefully. You might be fifty, but that is still too young to die. Getting married to the woman you love, getting castrated in your sleep by the woman you love. Keeping one of the best friends you have ever had, getting castrated by one of the best friends you have ever had. Dear God…well, at fifty, kids aren't really a realistic option. Wait! What the hell are you thinking man?! That's your…stuff you're talking about! Don't do that! Shit, they're all looking at you now…You need to say something Gil.' He thought. "I really liked your casserole…dish…thing, Greg. I'm going to go get more. Anyone else?" He asked quickly and, leaving no time for anyone to answer, practically ran to the kitchen to hide from, well, anyone. "Well, if Sara wasn't going to kill you before…" he said aloud.
"Well, Sara?" Catherine asked.
"I…" Sara stopped to think for a minute. 'Bastard! Okay…"What's this I hear about you screwing Warrick?" Good Lord how ignorant was that?! Um…what sounds like that? Brilliant name 'Warrick'! What the hell rhymes with that? Compliment weight, you like it, so does she…be creative.' Sara smiled, "I said 'Catherine, for what I see you eat, you look good for it.'" Sara sighed, it sounded nothing like what she had really said.
"That's it? That's seriously the best you can do?" Catherine snorted.
Sara smirked a bit, remembering her comment to Grissom about his 'plan' to tell the group. Oh, how she regrets mocking him right now. 'Where is that son of-'
Catherine cut her off from her thoughts, "You had better go in there and get Grissom and get right back in here, Little Miss Fake-Compliments-To-Save-My-Ass. Go!" she said and pointed towards the kitchen grinning from ear to ear. 'I win you sneaky bastards…'
Sara stood up in mock anger and headed off to the kitchen. When she got there, a bit of real anger took over.
Catherine avoided eye contact with Warrick at all costs. This didn't bother him one bit because he was doing the exact same with her. "Greg, are you really going to be okay?"
"I think I'll be fine, Cath, thanks. Nick…uh, yeah," he said and gave him a small pat on the back and a smile.
Nick smiled back, "So, Greg, about Sara?"
"Not now, please," he said holding up his hand. "Right now my throat hurts."
"Well, at least now we get to find out just what in the hell is going on," Warrick reasoned.
"Yeah, at my expense," Catherine blurted out.
"Your expense?" Warrick questioned. "I believe I was mentioned as well."
"I…well I don't seem to recall that," she said quickly and took a very long swig of her beer, followed by a couple of quick drinks to finish off the bottle.
"Something about you screwing me," Warrick said with raised eyebrows, seemingly in interest.
Nick and Greg didn't know what to do. If they get up, they're gonna get yelled at to sit back down to wait for Grissom and Sara. They certainly don't want to wait around for whatever is going on between Warrick and Catherine though. They just sat there, not wanting to piss off Catherine. Only one thing worse than a pissed Sara - a pissed Catherine and a pissed Sara.
"Is that what Sara said?" Catherine asked with mock innocence.
"I don't think you would have had the reaction you did if you had heard different, Catherine."
"Where are those two at?" Catherine asked quickly.
After entering the kitchen Sara walked over and slapped Grissom on the arm…hard.
"What the hell, Gil?"
She slapped him again, "I cannot believe you!"
"Seriously, what the hell was that in there?!" she slapped him again.
"OWW!!" he rubbed his arm. "If you're gonna keep hitting me, can you hit a different spot? Damn!"
She hit the same spot. "Way to play defense, you jackass!"
"It's Catherine!" he tried to reason.
She slapped him yet again and pointed to herself, "Hello, remember me, your fiancée?"
"Sara, I was going to get my ass kicked either way and you know it."
"Whatever." She slapped the same arm.
"Ow! You couldn't have just answered the woman's question?'
"You could've stepped in! You knew I was having too much fun to stop!"
"Hey, EVIL, you could've just let me announce it," he grinned.
"With a nonexistent speech!" she laughed.
"This whole thing was your idea!"
"Gil Grissom, you know better than to let me plan things. Everything I plan turns into something gross or something evil." She pointed at him.
"Oh, 'yeah well' nothing! We have to go back in there! Did you hear what I said to that woman?!"
"Of course I heard what you said! Why do you think I got the hell out of there?"
"You could've helped me!" she yelled.
"Did you hear what you said to that woman, Sara? Nothing anyone did or said after that was going to help you," he laughed.
"It wasn't even the first thing in my mind to say. Seriously! I had a million other things to say but the single most ignorant thing that could've come out, did," she sighed.
"I'm going to be late coming home tonight, Sara."
"What?" she looked confused.
"She's gonna try and kick your ass for saying that in front of Warrick."
"Try," she smiled. "Come on Boyfriend of the Year, let's go. Impending doom awaits us."
"Can I have a kiss first?" he smiled suggestively at her.
She leaned in like she was going to give him a kiss but instead, she hit his arm in the same spot as before. "You want a kiss? Your ass better earn it!" and she walked away from a groaning Grissom following close behind, rubbing his arm.
"Sara kick your ass, Gil?" Catherine asked.
"Uh, we have something to tell you guys," Grissom said, but only after Sara kicked him.
A bunch of mock gasps and 'no's came from around the table.
"Yeah, yeah," Sara said and waived her hand in the air.
"Sara and I are dating," Grissom said with a smile.
"Well, who in their right mind would have thought that?" Nick asked mockingly.
Warrick was next. "You two are not nice people, you know!" he laughed.
"Before I say this," Catherine started, "shut up Sara, but I agree with Warrick. This wasn't nice. You could've just told us."
Grissom pointed to Sara, "I wanted to, this was all her!"
She punched him in his arm again.
"Other arm, Sara, please!" he whined.
Greg finally chimed in, "So, Sara, any chance of you leaving him for me?" waggled his eyebrows at her.
"Um, there's something else to tell you guys," Sara said, nudging Grissom.
Grissom went to speak but Greg cut in. "Holy crap! They have sex! Sara's pregnant! You've been drinking all night! What the hell is wrong with you?!"
"Greg, I'm not pregnant!" Sara exclaimed.
"No!" Grissom yelled right along with her.
"What then?" Nick asked.
Sara took her ring out of her pocket and put it on her finger.
Catherine's eyes got big again, "You two are seriously engaged?!"
"Yes, Catherine," Sara said, walking over to show her the ring.
"Well, I'd make you swear on a stack of bibles, but I know how contact with holy things burns the skin of the truly evil, Sara. And you have good skin, so I won't make you." She smiled.
"Well, thank God for that," Sara smiled back.
Everyone, including a slightly gloomy Greg, congratulated Grissom and Sara and thanked them for dinner before heading for the door. Warrick offer Catherine a ride home and at the looks he received offered up the classic explanation that he had less to drink than she had so it would be better for him to drive. They all started to say their final good-byes, but Greg seemed lost in thought.
"Hey, you alright, Greg?" Sara asked.
"You sure?" she smiled.
"Anyone got Judy's number?" he smiled back.
I started writing this at 2:19am and finished at 5:14am. Can you tell?! Once again, you guys rock!
Please go review now. It'll brighten my day, and you know you want to do that!