My first time writing Gravi fanfiction, though I've loved the series for a long time. Hope you guys enjoy the story, so read and review!

DISCLAIMER: I obviously don't own Gravitation and wouldn't be wasting my time here if I did. For idiots like "black beauty", who DID waste my time the other day, this fic is rated M. That means, by even clicking on it, you hereby say "Yes, I can handle anything that could be contained under this rating." Because I will not sit here, wasting my time with this GIANT warning telling you of everything to watch out for/be aware of, thereby giving away some of my plot, nor listen to you whine. Do REAL books have giant warnings about every little thing? No. Don't like that? Then LEAVE. Now. For those who CAN handle it, read on!

Hold Me Gently, Always Catch Me

Chapter One


How did this happen again? Shuichi turned and pounded on the door that lead to his-well, his lover's-apartment. "Yuuuuukiiiii! I'm sorry for whatever I did! I'll make it up to you! Let me back inside! Yuuukiiiii!" His cries went predictably unheard, and the singer finally gave up, sliding down to the cold, tiled floor of the hallway; his back to the door, and a pillow covering up his painful hard on.

Yes, once again, Yuki Eiri had thrown Shuichi out of the apartment stark naked and fully aroused, for some complicated reason the smaller man probably couldn't even begin to contemplate. Unable to will it away, Shuichi quietly finished himself off, while picturing his blonde lover, all the while trying not to get anything on Yuki's pillow.

Giving into instinct, he curled up and clutched said pillow tightly. If he concentrated hard enough, he could almost smell Yuki's cologne on it, and that scent put his right to sleep-Leaving the PMSing writer to haunt his slumber.

However, Shuichi's 'sweet' dreams were short-lived. Someone nudged him, and a deep, familiar voice called him from his sleep. "Shuichi…get up."

A smile spread over his face while his eyes remained closed. "Yuki…you do care about me…" He leaned forward to place a kiss somewhere on his lover's body, when something cold shoved its way past his parted lips. Yuck! Yuki, what have you been eating? The singer's eyes fluttered open, his gaze falling upon the gun's silver barrel in his mouth, before taking in the daylight and crazy blonde American before him. "Kway?" Shuichi tried to mumble around the pistol.

"This is no time for questions! You're going to be late if we waste another second!" K grabbed the nude star of Bad Luck and dragged him outside to the van, easily ignoring the gasps of people around them. Shuichi clung desperately to the crimson pillow-his only form of cover. Once shoved inside, the gunman took off at high speeds, before tossing some clothing in the singer's lap. "That's the third time this month." He said seriously, before adding with a grin "So I was prepared this time!"

"T-Thanks, K."

"No problem!" He chirped in English. "Besides, it doesn't come out of my salary!"

Shuichi blinked, and then sighed, before dressing himself carefully, glad for the darkly tinted windows, as the van sped on. How did I make Yuki angry again? I've been so careful! The tears easily blurred his vision, and he looked up, determined to think of something else.

Luckily, K had that covered. "Hit Stage was so happy with you last time, that they're having you perform your new single today!" Bad Luck had actually been appearing on more music shows lately, instead of the variety kind. Being on TV was something that usually hyped Shuichi up and lifted his spirits, but not today.

"But…didn't Nittle Grasper just release two new singles?" There's no way they'd invite us over legends.

"That's right!" K beamed. "You'll be sharing the stage with your idol once again! But don't let that shake you. You can pull out something just as amazing as he can-you're just lacking in the proper motivation lately!" The blonde pulled out his favorite revolver. "If your lover can't handle it alone, I'll be glad to assist!" Then he took aim using the rearview mirror.

"Ahhh! I'm fine! I'm fine!"

K quirked a brow. "Really?"

"Really." Shuichi assured. The day had already started off badly, he didn't need to get shot on top of it.

When they had at last reached the TV station, Hiroshi and Suguru were already waiting over tea and coffee. K plopped the pink haired boy into a chair and grabbed the first person he could find-mainly Sakano-to make sure all was going according to plan, and that preparations were near completion.

"What's up, Shuichi?" Hiro greeted. "You look tired…did Yuki-san kick you out again?"

Shuichi simply stared at him, the nail obviously having been hit over the head. Yuki…waaaah! I want my good morning kiss! He willed himself to switch topics. "We're the side dish for Nittle Grasper again, aren't we?"

Hiro thought about asking what was wrong, but Suguru, sending nothing strange about the question, and happy that Shuichi seemed to be taking work seriously for once, spoke up first. "We are, but like last time, that shouldn't mean anything if we give it our all."

Give it our all…? I'm beat! Need…energy… Without a second thought, Shuichi grabbed Hiro's coffee and guzzled it down, before jumping up on the table and striking a chibi pose. "Let's rock!"

As K came back and announced that it was time for sound checks, Hiroshi decided to shrug it off. He was used to Shuichi's mood changes, though this was slightly peculiar. Oh well. That's what happens when you fall in love with someone like Yuki-san, I guess. He then swore to himself that he would never date anyone, man or woman, like Yuki Eiri. Then again, he knew love wasn't like that; it hits you unexpectedly and the hardest thing in the world is breaking away, even if you happen to realize that the person you love is actually killing you inside.

The trio that is Nittle Grasper stood and watched Bad Luck as the recording began. Usually, Ryuichi would be so excited to perform with, or even just watch his twin friend. Today, however, a serious look graced his handsome features. Tohma could feel something out of place with the cold stare his singer directed at the lead of Bad Luck. "It still doesn't reach." Is all the explanation he would offer to Tohma's questioning gaze. The blonde didn't see anything really wrong, but Ryuichi, being as extraordinary as he is, always seemed to have a sixth sense about these things-especially when to came to Shuichi.

As if conjoined at the brain, Shuichi could feel something slightly off in his idol's voice that day. Unable to place it, and not much wanting to ask about it, Shuichi made his way to the vending machines, deep in thought. I'm sure Yuki will let me back in tonight. I'd call, but I don't have my cell phone! Yuki's lucky no one called the cops since I was sleeping out there naked!

Suddenly, the lights went out, and no sooner than it had happened, Shuichi found his back pressed against the very machine he had just put money into. There was a beep, and a drink fell into the opening. Someone held onto his shoulders tightly.

"Don't kill me Yuuukiiii! Whatever it was, I didn't mean it!"

There was a soft sigh, made by a voice much lighter than that of the blonde writer's. "You're being such a boring old fart again, Shuichi."

The younger singer blinked in realization, as his eyes began to adjust to the darkness of the empty hall. "Sakuma-"


"R-Ryuichi-san…" Did I do something…? Why is he so angry?

There was another sigh, and his idol's warm breath tickled his neck. At last, piercing blue eyes met violet in the darkness. "What's wrong with you, Shuichi?"

"I don't know what you're-"

"Don't you love singing, more than anything?"

Shuichi gaped at the brunette. "O-Of course I do!"

"…you don't show it anymore." And with that, the death grip on his shoulders was released, and Ryuichi turned his back to the other singer, walking away. He paused in his steps after a moment, as if to stop and say more, but disappeared into the darkness.

Shuichi stood there, frozen, for the longest time, until Hiro showed up and flicked the lights on. "Shuichi? What are you doing?"

"I…" Coming back to his senses, he reached down and grabbed his drink. "Dammit! He made me get the wrong one!"

Boring? Old fart? Shuichi Shindou? I don't think so! And just to prove it, the crazy singer decided to go out drink with his buddy Hiro. He'd already had a few drinks too many, but it was strangely making him more serious instead of stupid. "Hey, Hiro…"


"You know that I love singing, right?"

Hiro watched his best friend for a moment, trying to see where this was going. "Of course. If you didn't, you wouldn't be doing it."

"…Sakuma-san doesn't think so."

The brunette blinked. "Ryuichi Sakuma?"

Shuichi nodded. "Before you came, today…he was there."

"Oh, so he turned out the lights. You're not cheating on Yuki-san, are you?"

"HIRO!" He knocked his friend over the head. "He said…that I must not love singing anymore."

"Well…you have been a little strange lately, but I wouldn't say that your love for singing has much to do with it."


"I'd place my bets on Yuki Eiri."

"Y-Yuki?" Then he panicked. "Oh no! I forgot to call! It's late! He's going to be mad! Bye Hiro!" And with that, he ran off 'home'.

However, upon his return, Shuichi found-to his relief, or perhaps disappointment-that he wasn't missing much. Yuki must have just finished a deadline and was fast asleep, not worried about the singer in the least. Suddenly, Shuichi ran to the bathroom and threw up-whether it was from the beer or the crappy day, he wasn't sure. At least he didn't get any on Yuki's carpet. Plopping onto the couch, he fell asleep faster than he thought possible in these circumstances.

Shuichi was officially in a slump. It happened whenever he was on the outs with Yuki or Ryuichi-though having problems with both of them at the same time was new. He could still sing-just not well enough to do anything. It was when he was getting a drink of water that his idol appeared out of no where and glomped him.

"Shuichi!" When he received no answer, he grabbed the boy's hand and dragged him off. "Let's go someplace fun!"


They passed the shacho, and Ryuichi waved. "We're going now! Bye bye, Tohma!"

Shuichi managed a "Sorry, Seguchi-san!" as he was pulled off. Tohma simply blinked before continuing on his way.

"Let's go to your house, Shuichi!"

"Uh…I don't think Yuki would like that."

Ryuichi blinked. "Yuki? Yuki…Yuki…Yuki…" He made motions of falling snow with his hands. "Yuki?"

Shuichi shook his head. "My boyfriend."

"Ooooh! Not that house!" The chibi frowned. "Shuichi's real house! Let's play video games!"

Ryuichi's driver had a bit of a hard time finding the place, but got them there eventually. Ryuichi happily introduced himself to the other singer's family, at which point Maiko nearly fainted. It wasn't everyday that someone famous walked through the door; not counting Shuichi, since he would always just be her big brother.

"Shuichi needs to try harder, or Ryuichi and Kumagoro will always win!"

He blinked, coming out of his stupor-it's not everyday your God is sitting next to you, and versing you at your favorite game, no less.

With the help of snacks and drinks, the two ending up have a great time-Maiko cheering on Ryuichi and drooling all the while. Shuichi's mother even offered that they could stay the night in Shuichi's old room, since they came 'all that way'. Ryuichi eagerly accepted with "Yaaaay! Sleepover, na no da!" before Shuichi could even think about protesting.

Yuki glanced at the clock. Where is that brat? He usually calls me a million times…he's probably getting drunk again. If only he knew.

Ryuichi refused to let Shuichi out of his sight long enough for the younger singer to go make a phone call to his lover. It won't hurt him to worry about you for once. And as they laid side by side on their futons, a heavy silence fell over them. Shuichi was openly awake, while Ryuichi pretended to be asleep while in deep thought, as much as some people stupidly thought he was incapable of it.

"Hey, Shuichi…"


Why do you like Yuki? "Thanks for letting me stay over."

"Oh, it's no problem. My family seems happy to have you…"

In a serious mood, but unable to voice his thoughts, Ryuichi did the only thing he could think of. "Tooku de me o hikarasete, mezameru monotachi matte iru…yoru jouheki sasowarete, utsurisumu mure no nukegara ni…" From far away, let your eyes shine, those who have awakened are still waiting…seduce the ramparts of the night, in the cast-off pile of skins left by things that now live elsewhere...

As he hoped, Shuichi followed his lead. "Deguchi no nai." Without an exit.

And they began switching off and trying funny harmonies. "Shougeki ni taeru tsumori nara…" If you intend to survive the impact…

"Kuzureru hodo." To the point where you fall apart.

"Itsuwari o misete…" Enrapture the deceits…

"Umarekawareru anata yo hitori hohoemanaide hitomi o irodoru…" You who have been reborn, color your eyes without smiling alone…

"Nozonda sekai ga totsuzen hai ni natte mo kiseki ni mada meguriaeru…" Even if the world you longed for has suddenly turned to ash, in some miracle, we could still crush past each other…

"Sotto dakishimete, kowasu you ni." Hold me gently, in order to break me.

"Muku na mama de sarasarete hanabira o chirasu hana no you ni…migaku houseki te no naka no hibi ni sae kizukihajimeteru…" Be exposed to a state of purity, like a flower whose petals have fallen…you're just beginning to notice, the days are shining jewels cupped in your hand…

"Tsumetai te ga." A cold hand.

"Nukeochita toge o hiru kara…" Gathers up the shed thorns, so…

"Madoromu hi ga." A banked flame.

"Kusuburitsuzukeru…" Continues to smolder…

"Ima mo todokanu hikari no yukue, azayaka ni mau omoi o egakou…" Let's depict the vividly dancing thoughts, found in that place of light that is unreachable even now…

"Michibiku kotoba ga koborete shimawanu you ni, utsuru toki o osorenaide…" Don't fear the change of time, so that words of guidance won't completely spill out and flow away…

"Deguchi mo naku, kuzureochiru."And there's no way out, I'm falling further down.

"Umarekawari no anata yo, hitori hohoemanaide, hitomi o irodoru…" You who have been reborn, color your eyes without smiling alone…

"Nozonda sekai ga totsuzen hai ni natte mo kiseki ni mada meguriaeru…" Even if the world you longed for has suddenly turned to ash, in some miracle, we could still crush past each other…

"Todokanu hikari no yukue, azayaka ni mau omoi o egakou…" Let's depict the vividly dancing thoughts, found in that place of light that is unreachable even now…

"Michibiku kotoba ga koborete shimawanu you ni, utsuru toki o osorenaide…" Don't fear the change of time, so that words of guidance won't completely spill out and flow away…

And then, together: "Sotto dakishimete, zutto tsukamaete, motto kokoro made kowasu you ni." Hold me gently, always catch me, more and more, in order to break my heart.

They ended up laughing at it all, and just as Ryuichi had hoped, through the song Shuichi had forgotten all his problems, because that's what singing does, if you love it enough.

"HEY YOU TWO IDIOTS-" Maiko stopped dead in the doorway, suddenly remembering that it was Ryuichi Sakuma and Shuichi, not Hiroshi and Shuichi. She pasted on her best smile. "Kidding! Keep it down, please? I'm about to enter the world of Yuki-san, and I require absolute silence." In her arms, she cradled not the book he had just finished the night before, but the one before that. It'd been on backorder for so long, and she had finally gotten her copy that morning. "And don't forget, you promised to get me a pair of his-"

And with all those simple words, she made it completely flood back to Shuichi's mind, and the older singer knew it. He jumped up, not caring who saw him in his boxers. "Okay! We're sorry for disturbing you, Maiko-chan! We'll be quiet! Thanks much, nite nite, na no da!" He waved and closed the door on her with a small sigh.

Maiko blinked at the closed door. "That was weird…" Then she realized it. Oh mi'god! I saw Ryuichi Sakuma in his UNDERWEAR! She squealed and ran off to her room, determined to take pictures in the morning when they got up.

"I'm sorry, Shuichi…"

The younger singer blinked. "For what?"

Ryuichi crawled back into his futon on his side, his back to the other. "I only wanted…to help you forget."

And from there, no one spoke another word that night…but never before had Shuichi felt quite so close to his God.

The next morning, Maiko grabbed her camera and, finding her brother's door open and room empty, she rushed downstairs. "Where are they?"

"They had to leave early to go to work-I'm afraid you missed them."

"DAMMIT!" Do you have any idea how much I could have sold that picture for!? And I could have made copies! Lots and lots of copies! UGH!

"Doughnuts!" Ryuichi dove his face into the bag they had just bought while on their way to N-G. When he pulled back, his face was covered in sprinkles, and he had half a doughnut in his mouth. "Wan ome ooiee?"

Shuichi shook his head. "…no thanks."

The older singer swallowed it down. "Shuichi's being pressured into dieting, isn't he?!"

Said boy put his hands up. "No! Nothing like that!"

"Are you sure?"

"Very sure."

"Then you want one, right?"

Shuichi blinked. "No! I just said-"

"Ah ha! I knew it! Why do you need to diet? Aren't you smaller than me?"


"I know how to find out! Let's trade pants, na no da!"


Shuichi had to admit he felt rather special walking into N-G wearing Ryuichi Sakuma's pants. Who knew we're the exact same size? I'm so lucky!

"Okay! I go this way, Shuichi!"

"Ah-wait, Sakuma-"


"Ryuichi-san! Um…when do you…want these back?" He gestured to the pants.

The older singer shrugged. "You can keep them. I have lots more. Bye bye!" He gave his special to-Shuichi-only wave and skipped off.

Shuichi returned Ryuichi's funny hand motions and started down the opposite hall. Okay! Now to call Yuki. He pulled out his cell phone and began to dial, until he was violently yanked forward, almost dropping it. "H-Hey!"

"It's about time you showed up, Shindou-san! Why did you disappear yesterday?"


"It doesn't matter. You have to hear my new mix for Easy Action!"

"But I was about to…" He sighed as Suguru dragged him down the hall to the recording room. It was hopeless. He'd just have to call Yuki at lunch.