AN: Hola folks... yes yes I wrote ANOTHER angsty one-shot… but maybe it isn't a one shot… anyway warnings: Language, gore, sodomy, beatings, cutting, suicide. As always please R and R and let me know if you think it's crap or not cause I truly want to get better, also an IMPORTANT AN at the bottom

My personal hell


Why does everyone have to look at me with those eyes?

Why does everyone have to say those things?

What did I ever do to them?

What did I ever FUCKING do to them?!




They say it all while staring at me with those cold, cruel eyes

They say it and laugh as they beat me with their fists, their feet

Their bottles

There bats

Even the children beat me

Pummel me with their tiny fists and laugh

They always laugh

Laugh as I lay curled in the fetal position

Leaking blood and shit and bile

My bones broken

Bent and broken into angles no human could ever achieve

And then they spit on me

Spit and curse as they throw garbage and bottles at my dieing body

Yet no matter how much I want to give in

Just give up

Give up on hope,

On life


Something starts to heal me

And it burns

It hurts worse then the beatings

Feeling each pulverized bone snapping, shifting, grinding back into position

Feeling my sundered skin cauterize and re-form on my broken and sobbing body

Feel as the organs, hanging on by mere threads outside my body get torn back into my body and reshape themselves into some semblance of normalcy.

I puke blood in that dirty back ally

It reeks of shit and vomit and piss

I just want to DIE but my body won't let me.

And then I hear it

Hear that damned, deep, sadistic animal growling

The demon keeps me alive

Telling me she relishes in my pain for daring to keep HER locked away

Every night she visits me

Making me relive the day's events

Night after night reliving the blades and kicks

The bats and glass that my broken body lived through that day

Some nights are worse though

Some nights she personally sees to my torture

Burning and then freezing

Being skinned alive, feeling every nerve ending burning with pain as the skin is ripped from my body.

Yet never


Letting me die…

I scream

I scream and scream and NOBODY hears me

NOBODY cares

After all, I'm just



I don't even know my own name anymore

After the old man dies, no one feeds me

No one even TRYS to stop them

The crowd

The entire damn VILLAGE screaming

Screaming for my blood

The beatings, if possible, get worse

Soon I'm being stripped naked

Metal spikes covered in glass violate every hole that I have

It feels as if I'm being torn in half from the inside out

I bleed

I scream

I cry

And no one stops them

No one cares

That night my demon mistress finds new ways to torture me

She violates me with fire

She uses all nine tails

And I am dieing

Dieing again as I'm torn in two

As my body burns from the inside out

And then it stops

Its morning again…

I don't know how I managed to stay sane this long

I don't know how I manage to always greet each morning and plaster that damn smile on my face.

I don't know what,

Or when

Or how I finally broke

Maybe it was when the teachers decided to strip me naked and whip me with barbed wire

Or maybe, when the children were practicing with their kunai and one "accidentally" tore my eyes out.

All I know is the villager, the one kind man

The town drunk

Gave me a way out

That day, he handed me a razor and told me that

"Thissh villagesh better without a damn dymon here, yoush know whatdda do scum," and mimed pulling the blade across his wrists and throat.

That night I didn't care about the house having been broken into and having shit smeared on my walls.

That night I didn't care that my cloths had been pissed on

Or that my ratty pile of rags that I called a bed had been lit on fire

Or that the house had messages scrawled on the walls wishing for my death

I slowly drew the razor across my wrists, then up the arm, then across my throat

I felt it

I felt the pleasant floating sensation that I assumed was my poor twisted soul leaving my abused body

I started feeling light headed and everything was turning white



AN: Ok… now that you have read it (you HAVE read it right?!) r & r as usual, flame me, praise me, hate me w/e but ALSO vote if you wanna see this one continued as one of three options 1) a two shot alternate perspective on this story (different persons point of view) 2) a nice LOOONG angst filled fic (I'll try and keep y'all entertained) or 3) a Naru/Hina angst/fluff fic…. Up to you, now GO ON… VOTE!!!