Title: Elf Lord Surprise
Word Count: 1,182
Rating: PG
Category: Romance, Humor, Post-Episode viggie
Genre: Slash
Summary: What happened after WitchHunt ended?
Spoilers: Spoilers for WitchHunt.
Author's Notes: selinamoonfire gave me the plot bunny that became this whole story just by asking a simple question. Thanks dude:D
Disclaimer: These characters belong to DPB, CBS, Paramount, et al. No copyright infringement is intended.


Ziva looked up from the paperwork that she'd been finishing up and glanced over her shoulder. Abby's mischievously grinning face was only inches from hers.

"Hello, Abby."

Abby's grin only got wider. She gave her skirt an excited twitch. Ziva forced herself to look back at the papers on her desk and not let her eyes follow the way that Abby moved.

"You know," Abby purred, her breath warm against Ziva's cheek, "McGee took a very interesting picture tonight."

"Oh?" Ziva's mind worked quickly, trying to remember McGee photographing something that Abby would find interesting. It wasn't likely any of the crime scene photos he'd taken. Those were commonplace and not enough to excite Abby like this.

"Yes, with his new camera phone." Abby's voice took on a sing-song tone that worried Ziva for reasons she couldn't quite place. She felt like she was two steps behind and missing a vital puzzle piece in this conversation.

"He even sent it to me." Abby wasn't even attempting to contain her excitement any longer. "Wanna see?"

Ziva gave up on her paperwork, and swiveled her desk chair around so that she was facing Abby.

Abby seemed to take this as a confirmation of her interest. She was already fumbling a phone out from a small clutch that matched her dress.

She snapped the phone open, pressed a few buttons and then held the phone out so that Ziva could see the picture.

Ziva caught a flash of blue before she had a chance to finish processing what she was seeing. She didn't have to though. She lunged for the phone.

With impressive speed, Abby pulled it away and held it up over their heads.

Ziva stared. "How did McGee get a picture of me wearing that?"

Abby smirked. "He said something about you and Tony being distracted when Gibbs came in. You know," she said thoughtfully, "I should probably send a copy of this to Tony too. He'd love to have it."

Ziva's stare turned into a glare. She had a reputation to maintain. She was a Mossad agent not an Elf Lord. What Tony would do with the picture…She scowled.

"Do. Not. Give. It. To. Tony."

Abby shook her head slowly.

"That's not asking nicely."

Ziva jumped for the phone. Abby's greater height and high heels gave her the advantage and she easily kept it out of Ziva's grasp.

"That's not very nice," she said with a pout that was rendered ineffective by her laughter.

"Threatening to send Tony that picture is not very nice," Ziva muttered. She put her hands on her hips and glared up at Abby. "In fact, it is very mean."

Ziva knew a hundred different ways to kill a man, hurt him, make him scream and make him wish to tell her everything he had ever known or thought he might know. And yet, she could not get a simple phone from a woman who was not even a field agent.

It was…frustrating. And it called for a change in tactics.

Sparing one last glance for the phone in question, Ziva locked eyes with Abby. She took a step closer to Abby, until only an inch of space separated them.

"What are you going to do about it?"

Several options flashed through Ziva's mind before she settled on one. She took one hand off of her hip, and rested it on Abby's. The soft fabric of Abby's dress swayed under her touch.

Ziva leaned forward. "I think," she said very slowly, bringing her lips closer and closer to Abby's, "that I am going to do this." Her lips brushed against Abby's for an instant before she stretched up and snatched the cell phone from Abby's hand.

"Ah-hah!" She said in triumph, stepping away from Abby as she clutched the phone in her hands. Ziva didn't see the look of all-too-real disappointment on Abby's face as she quickly deleted the picture from Abby's phone. "Now you cannot send a picture of this to Tony."

"Yeah." Abby said, dully. As if she would have. It was simply more fun to wind up Ziva.

"This is yours." Ziva held out the phone.

"Yeah, thanks." Abby didn't bother to try to disguise her short temper. She turned her back on Ziva and grabbed her clutch from where she'd carelessly laid it on Gibbs' desk. "I should go."

"Abby," Ziva called after her. There was a pleading tone to the way Ziva said her name.

It was enough to make her slow her steps but not stop. Abby folded her arms over her chest as she waited for the elevator doors to open.

Ziva caught up with her just before they did. The doors slid open and Ziva quickly moved to stand in front of them, blocking Abby's path.

"I upset you," she said bluntly.

Abby rolled her eyes. "Can you move?"

"Of course I can. My legs are working just fine." Ziva stared at her in puzzlement, momentarily distracted from Abby's anger.

Abby glared. Ziva could be so literal… "Will you move?"

Ziva spread her arms to grip the elevator doors on either side. "No." She paused, considering. "Not until you tell me why you're angry."

Abby considered not answering. And then she considered how stubborn Ziva was.

"You kissed me!"

Ziva looked startled. Kind of like a deer Abby had once seen caught in her headlight's as she pulled into her parent's driveway when she was a teenager.

"It was a tactic, Abby, nothing more," she explained slowly. She hadn't thought Abby would mind, that she would be this upset.

"I know." The plaintive words were out of Abby's mouth before she could stop them.

Ziva's arms dropped from the side of the elevator and Abby pushed past her and hit the button for the garage.

She realized her miscalculation a moment too late as the doors slid shut, leaving her and Ziva closed inside the elevator. Abby didn't have a chance to react, before Ziva reached over to hit the emergency stop.

"You're not Gibbs."

"No, but it is a useful tactic-"

"I think I've had enough tactics for one night," Abby said acidly, crossing her arms over her chest as she leaned back against the elevator wall.

"I didn't realize…If you wanted me to kiss you, you could have simply asked instead of taunting me with a picture."

"Don't make fun of me."

Slowly Ziva walked towards her.

"I'm not."

She gently brushed her lips against Abby's. Abby didn't respond, but Ziva could feel the shiver that ran through her. Ziva pressed her lips to Abby's again, more firmly, seeking a response. This time Abby pressed back into the kiss until Ziva found herself more engaged than she had intended, her hand twisting into the silky, heavy fabric of Abby's dress.

Ziva pulled away slowly to look up into Abby's eyes. "I should thank McGee for taking that picture."

Abby shook her head, blonde ringlets bouncing a little. "I don't think we have to go that far – Elf Lord."

Ziva took the opportunity to silence her with another kiss.