Rating: PG-13 (Lots of language, nonexplicit sexuality)
Summary: Demyx is clingy.
God, this kid was clingy. Even in his sleep, he grasped and squeezed as close as possible. It was fucking annoying. Axel looked down at the fuzzy blonde head nestled again his chest and rolled his eyes. This was a bad idea. He had known from the beginning that it was. But he had ignored his gut and chosen to think with certain more southerly parts. And it had been a mistake. He feared he had thrown away his relative isolation for a little sex. Sure, it was good sex. His mouth twitched into a satisfied smirk. Damn good sex, when it came down to it. But no sex was good enough for him to deal with this goddamn clinging. It was as though Demyx thought a couple—all right, fine, more than a couple—hormonal outbursts were, what? A relationship? He would have laughed it was happening to any other member of the Organization. But it wasn't. He was the one with the little girl of the Nobodies following him around like a lovesick puppy.
Demyx was nothing. Demyx was nothing but cheap sex. He didn't mean anything to Axel. Not that Axel was capable of any of that shit. He didn't feel anything. Not love, not affection, not sadness, not guilt. Just anger. That was what made Roxas different. He didn't care about Roxas. But Roxas made him think that maybe it was true. Maybe, sometime in a past he couldn't recall, he did feel things. Maybe he was a real man, once. Because when he was around Roxas, there was a peculiar burning in his hollow chest. It hurt, and he savored it. Most of the time, he managed to convince himself that it was a lie. That he had been born empty and would die empty, and there had never been an interval between the two when there was no echo inside. It was easier to deal with. Because if he had felt, then he should miss it. And he didn't miss it. It killed him that he didn't miss feeling. So he scoffed and shrugged and brushed flaming spikes away from his eyes. It was a fantasy. A fucking dream.
And then there was Roxas. Giving him the memory of emotion. He hated him. Hatred was the only emotion he really felt nowadays, so he used it on the only person he knew deserving of his emotion. Even the thought of Roxas worked its magic. He should feel bad, lying here with Demyx's arms around him. Feeling Demyx's light breath against his chest. He should feel guilty; that he had betrayed Roxas. He should regret it. He didn't. He couldn't. But he remembered that he should. That was something.
Demyx murmured something in his sleep and smiled against Axel's side. His moving lips tickled and inflamed. Axel was struck with the sudden impulse to do something drastic. He didn't really care what. Something big. Something sharp, and hot. He brought up his hand and rested it on top of Demyx's head. He felt the feathery tufts of hair and stroked them gently, trying it out. It didn't work. He didn't feel it. There was no bite in his chest. But his movement had roused his lover.
"Mmm…" Still-groggy Demyx smacked his lips absentmindedly and tilted his head back to look up at Axel with happy half-lidded eyes. Axel glared down at him. He should feel…something. Anything. Affection? Joy? All he felt was annoyance. Also a little bit horny, but that was to be expected when there was a naked, slender boy curled up against you. Not important. Mostly he was annoyed. Why did Demyx do that? How did Demyx do that? He looked as though he felt it. He looked like there was something real behind his eyes. That shouldn't be there. Thinking about it was making his annoyance flare quickly in rage.
"Axel?" Demyx looked more roused, and slightly disturbed. "Is that a come-screw-me-senseless look or I'm-in-a-shitty-mood look? I'm too tired to be sure."
Axel didn't say anything. He let the spike of flame hovering in his palm do the talking. He watched the flickering light. It was so beautiful. He loved flame. Most people feared the destructive power of fire. Then again, most people had hearts. Maybe it was because he was so empty that he loved this burst of energy. It's warmth was so beautiful. He was cold. Cold through and through. He had tried to warm himself up; tried to fix it. He had attempted to put the heat back inside, where it belonged. But it didn't work. Of course not. It never worked. He looked back at Demyx.
"Umm," the blonde was nervous, talking too fast, "you know, I think I'm going to go back to my room, you know, maybe--" Axel remained silent as he lunged suddenly at Demyx. With a squeak, Demyx scuttled backward across the bed away from the flame and its wielder. He fell off the side of the bed with a loud thunk. Axel smirked at the blonde's awkward position. Demyx was less amused. "Fuck, man that was not cool."
"No? I thought it was pretty fucking hilarious." Axel laughed to himself, and let the flame lower and spike a few times, watching it closely.
"You know what? I so don't have to deal with this." Demyx scrambled to his feet and stomped to the other side of the room. Axel watched while he retrieved his pants from where they had been flung earlier that night. He pulled them on and turned around, scanning the room quickly for his robe.
"Going so soon?"
"Fuck yes, I'm going." Axel pursed his lips and tsked mockingly.
"Language, Demyx. Swearing is the crutch of the intellectually deviant."
"You know what, Axel? I really don't give a fuck what you think about my fucking language."
"Careful, honey, you're going to hurt my feelings." Demyx shot him a look so icy that Axel could have sworn he felt the cold brush against his skin. It was a delicious feeling. Demyx spotted his robe and bent to retrieve it.
"I'm not just your sex poodle you know. I have feelings."
"No, you don't." Demyx sighed, holding his robe against his chest.
"Well, I feel like I have feelings."
"That makes no sense."
"Just because you're empty doesn't mean that—"
"Open your ears, kid. We're Nobodies. We don't have hearts. We don't feel. Anything. Not at all. Got it—"
"Memorized, sure." Demyx sighed again and looked away. Axel took advantage of the blonde's distraction to slip closer and closer. Demyx looked back with an unforgiving look in his eyes. Axel stopped and raised his hands in mock-innocence.
"What?" Demyx watched him for a few moments before sighing irritably and starting to pull on his long robe.
"I'm not stupid, you know. I know you all think I'm some dumb blonde, but I'm not. And, anyway, who are you to make fun of me? You're the slutty redhead." Axel rolled his eyes, then darted forward and grabbed Demyx around the waist. He pulled him close and smiled when the shorter man tried to wriggle out of his grasp, creating some very nice friction. "Mmm, you keep that up and I'm never gonna let you go." Demyx abruptly went still as stone.
"Cut it out, Axel. I have to go."
"We've got all the time in the world." It was true. Time meant nothing here. The World that Never Was seemingly existed outside of any laws of time or space. Or it might just have been the futility of deadlines when you were broken inside, either way. But Demyx wasn't going along with it.
"I'm not playing your games anymore, whatever the hell they are."
"Who said there was a game?" Demyx scoffed.
"Everything is a game to you." Axel couldn't argue with that. It was true. He loved games. He played with everyone and everything. Roxas wouldn't play with him, of course. But Roxas was different. He was always different. Demyx narrowed his eyes. "You're thinking about him."
"What? Who?" Axel feigned ignorance but Demyx arched his eyebrows.
"C'mon. I know. You get this misty look in your eyes whenever you think about Ro-" Demyx was not allowed to say his name. Axel had to think fast to find a way to shut Demyx up in time. It only took him a moment to come up with the perfect solution. He shoved his hand down the front of Demyx's pants, and the blonde's breath hitched. Success. Since he was already there, Axel did a few interesting things that made Demyx squeeze his eyes shut and gasp. Axel smiled watching the squirming man then, in one smooth movement, pushed Demyx away. He stumbled backward, shocked and disheveled.
"Okay. Go ahead. Leave." There was a quick flash of fury across Demyx's features. Axel grinned. The game master always wins. Demyx looked like he was going to berate him, then shook his head.
"God, I hate you." Something caught in Axel's hollow chest. It twitched and he winced even as he treasured it. He rested his hand gently against his bare chest. It was true. Demyx was looking at him as though he had suddenly gone completely insane.
"What's with you?" Axel looked up at his bright eyes and smiled a little bit. He thought that maybe, he'd find out how Demyx was able to put so much emotion into eyes that should have been blank and cold.
"Nothing. Just…I hate you, too."