Author Notes: In which Alex Wert guarantees himself a one way ticket to hell. This won't make much sense to anyone who hadn't witnessed the original conversations between myself and Beer Good on SFA. What can I say? The two of us are nuts (but at least I haven't written Cluffy - or that other weird pairing).


Cardinal Sodano made his way down the long staircases into the vaults of the Musei Vaticani to meet with the Pope. Like many other days, the many works of art and ancient scriptures were being perused by distinguished emissaries from the far reaches of the Catholic Church and scholars representing affiliated prestigious institutions from around the world.

"Good morning, your holiness," Cardinal Sodano said as he greeted his pontiff.

"Good morning," the Pope replied, looking up from his papyrus, then startled the cardinal by doing a double-take, a grin breaking across his face. "I think I am in love!" he sighed breathlessly. "Who is that over there?"

The Cardinal squinted at the redheaded woman and the skinny blond boy before recognition struck him. "Oh, that is Willow Rosenberg, one of the principal figures of the Watchers Council of England. She and her colleague are examining our library archives. But your holiness, she is a heathen and a deviant and I strongly recommend against it."

"Not her: the associate."

From this moment on, the Pope resolved himself to a mission. A mission to get into blond boy's pants.