Chapter 1: The beginning of a new banshee free story that will involve Sam and Dean Winchester and a couple of very VERY fast things that go zoom, voom, bang, bash, and other noises that can make people jump very high or just go "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah!"

Sam looked over at Dean in disgust as he finished singing along with Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven. Dean grinned at him as the last notes of the song faded away. Sam just shook his head.

"What's your problem, Sam?" Dean asked as he turned off the stereo. "Stairway to Heaven is a classic." Sam just sighed.

"What ever man." Dean looked at him and turned on the radio to hear the opening notes of Fergie's Fergalicious. Dean looked disgusted and started to change the station.

"What are you doing man? I love this song." Sam said as the opening lyrics started. Dean just shook his head and rolled his eyes but it left it alone.

Listen up ya'll, Cuz this is it

The beat that I'm bangin' is de-li-cious

"This is fucking retarded." Dean mumbled under his breath.

"Shhh! This is my favorite part of the song." Sam said as he started singing along with the song. Dean sighed and reached in the back seat of the car for some ear plugs.

Fergalicious definition make them boys go loco
They want my treasure so they get their pleasures from my photo
You could see me, you can't squeeze me
I ain't easy, I ain't sleazy
I got reasons why I tease 'em
Boys just come and go like seasons

Fergalicious (so delicious)
But I ain't promiscuous
And if you was suspicious
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That puts them boys on rock, rock
And they be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)

Dean came up empty handed as Sam started dancing in his seat to the song. Dean groaned, this was going to be a long night. He looked over at Sam, he reminded him of a 7th grader at his first dance.

So delicious (It's hot, hot)
So delicious (I put them boys on rock, rock)
So delicious (they wanna taste of what I got)
I'm Fergalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty)

Fergalicious def-, Fergalicious def-, Fergalicious def- def fading echo
Fergalicious definition make them boys go crazy
They always claim they know me
Comin' to me call me Stacy (Hey Stacy)
I'm the F to the E, R, G the I the E
And can't no other lady put it down like me

I'm Fergalicious (so delicious)
My body stay vicious
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness
He's my witness (oooh wee)
I put yo' boy on rock rock
And he be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)

"Alright… I'm officially going to rip out that stereo if this song doesn't end REALLY soon." Dean said as he gripped the steering wheel harder. Sam ignored him and kept on singing, turning the volume up as he did until the car was practically vibrating with the noise.

So delicious (It's hot, hot)
So delicious (I put them boys on rock, rock)
So delicious (they wanna taste of what I got)
Fergalicious (hold hold hold hold hold up, check it out)

Baby, baby, baby
If you really want me
Honey get some patience
Maybe then you'll get a taste
I'll be tasty, tasty, I'll be laced with lacey
It's so tasty, tasty, It'll make you crazy

T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty, T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty
D to the E to the L I C I O U S, to the D to the E to the, to the, to the, hit it Fergie

"Fergie? What the hell kind of a name is Fergie?" Dean asked, but Sam didn't hear him over the music blasting out of the speakers.

All the time I turn around brotha's gather round always looking at me up and down looking at my
(uuhh)
I just wanna say it now I ain't tryin to round up drama little mama I don't wanna take your man
And I know I'm comin off just a little bit conceited and I keep on repeating how the boys wanna eat it
But I'm tryin' to tell, that I can't be treated like clientele
Cuz' they say she

Delicious (So delicious)
But I ain't promiscuous
And if you was suspicious
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That puts them boys on rock, rock
And they be lining down the block just to watch what I got (got, got, got)
Four, tres, two, uno

"Why are they alternating languages?" Dean screamed as he felt his brain cells exploding along with his eardrums. Sam continued to ignore Dean as the song continued turning Dean's brain into jelly.

My body stay vicious
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness
He's my witness (oooh wee)
I put yo' boy on rock rock
And he be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)

It's so delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
I'm Fergalicious, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t tasty, tasty
It's so delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
I'm Fergalicious, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t (aye, aye, aye, aye)

"My brain is melting in oblivion!!!!" Dean screamed as he pulled off to the side of the road and covered his ears. Sam continued to sing along with Fergie, completely unaware that Dean had pulled over to the side of the road.

T to the A, to the S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A, to the S T E Y girl you tasty
T to the A, to the S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A, to the, to the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
To the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the, to the, to the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)

T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty
T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A, to the, to the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
To the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the, to the, to the, to the, to the, to the...

As the last notes faded away Sam finally looked over at Dean, wondering why he was in the fetal position in his seat.

"Dean?" Sam asked as Dean finally unplugged his ears. "Why are we sitting on the side of the road? And why are you in a fetal position?"

Dean looked around him and sat up in his seat with a heavy sigh. "If you ever make me listen to that crap again I will personally tie and gag you in the back seat." Sam just laughed at him and turned the radio back on to hear the opening notes of Fergie's London Bridge. Dean screamed and dove for the stereo only to be hit from behind by Sam. Dean's vision swam and Sam tied him up and threw him in the back seat.

"Sorry Dean." Sam said as the song started up. He slid over into the driver's seat and pulled onto the road, singing along with Fergie.

Oh shit (oh shit) (oh shit) (oh shit)
Are you ready for this?
Oh shit (oh shit)
Ohhhhh
It's me, Fergie
The Pimp!
Polow!
Fergie Ferg, what's up, baby?

Verse 1
When I come to the club, step aside.
Pop da seats, don't be hatin me in da line.
V.I.P., 'cause you know I gotta shine.
I'm Fergie Ferg, give me love you long time

All my girls get down on the floor,
Back to back, drop it down real low.
I'm such a lady, but I'm dancing like a ho,
'Cause you know
I don't give a fuck, so here we go!

Dean screamed something that sounded like, "I give a fuck if we listen to this crap!" through his gag as he started trying to kick Sam from behind.


Chorus
How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…

How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…

BridgeAs the drinks start pouring,
And my speech start slurring,
Everybody start looking real good.

Verse 2the Grey goose got your girl feeling loose.
Now I'm wishin' that I didn't wear these shoes. (I hate heels)
it's like er'ytime I get up on the dude,
Paparazzi put my business in the news.

And I'm like get up out my face, (oh shit)
'fo turn around and spray your ass with mace, (oh shit)
My lips make you wanna have a taste. (oh shit)
You got that?
I got the bass.

Dean screamed through his gag, but Sam just ignored him and kept on driving singing along where he knew the words.

Chorus
How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…

How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…

Bridge 2
Aah, da, da, da, da, do, do, do, do
Me like a bullet type, you know they comin' right
Fergie love em' long time
My girls support right?
Aah, da, da, da, da, do, do, do, do
Me like a bullet type you know they comin' right
Fergie love em' long time
My girls support right?

Verse 1
When I come to the club, step aside.
Pop a seats, don't be heavy on the line.
V.I.P., 'cause you know I gotta shine.
I'm Fergie Ferg,give me love you long time

All my girls get down on the floor,
Back to back, drop it down real low.
I'm such a lady, but I'm dancing like a ho,
'Cause you know
I don't give a fuck, so here we go!

Chorus
How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…

How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…

Fuck you, bitches.

As the last of the words faded away Sam stopped the car and looked around him. "Dean? Huh, I wonder where Dean went." Sam looked in the back seat and saw Dean bleeding in the back unconscious.