Author's Note: Uh…uh… CHRISTMAS IN FEBRUARY!!!!! MWHAHAHA!!!

Seriously though, I'm really really sorry about how late this is. I've been busy with you know, life. I hope no one' angry. :(

Sorry if Charlie's a bit ooc...


Here tis!

Christmas in Forks

Chapter Four – Christmas Day

"Merry Christmas Cullen family!" Bella yelled as she burst in through the door way.

She was a little creeped out to find the Cullen's were already standing in a half circle around the doorway, eager looks on their faces.

Bella was also creeped out by the dangerous looking helmet sitting on Emmett's head and the keys he was holding tightly.

"Merry Christmas, Bella," Edward said warmly, coming forward to greet her.

She had come early. Charlie wouldn't be there for another hour and a half.

"What's got you guys all so excited," Bella asked dubiously.

"PRESENTS!" Emmett cheered. "We're going to give you the presents we got you!"

Alice nodded sagely.

"Cool," Bella agreed, "I got all you gifts right here." She patted a large paper shopping bag colored with green and red stripes.

Instantly, everyone began protesting that she need not have gotten them anything. Everyone, that is, except Emmett, who looked gleeful upon hearing this.

"I didn't get you anything," Bella protested, "I made you guys stuff."

Esme grinned. "How wonderful! What did you do?"

"I guess you'll go first then, Esme," Bella said. Edward hung up her snow soaked coat on the rack and they followed Alice into the living room, where a fire was crackling merrily.

"Here you go," Bella said gleefully, handing Esme a wrapped package. "Merry Christmas Esme!"

Esme opened her gift, which to her delight was a knitted shawl. All Bella's gifts were knitted. She had secretly taken up the hobby a while ago and not told Edward.

Emmett received a pair of bright green mittens; Rosalie got a dark purple purse; Alice was given a scarf knit with really interesting yarn; Carlisle gained a brown hat; Jasper a vest, and Edward got a sweater knit with cashmere.

After they finished thanking Bella and complimenting her skill on the gifts, Emmett reminded everyone that they had presents for her.

"Me first!" Emmett shouted and promptly ran off.

Bella looked nervously at Alice.

"Don't look at me!" Alice said. "We kept it a secret what each of us got you. It's going to be a surprise for us too."

"It doesn't have anything to do with that helmet he had earlier, does it?" Bella asked.

"Nope," Jasper said, "That was his Christmas present. A motorcycle."

"Ah, I see," Bella said, just as Emmett ran back into the room and promptly threw her… a helmet.

Bella shot Jasper a look, even though it wasn't the same one he had with him earlier.

"Nice," Bella said, "Thanks Emmett. Hopefully I won't fall enough that I need this."

"No, no, no!" Emmett protested. "That's not all!"

And then he wheeled in a motorized scooter.

Everyone stared, in shocked silence.

Then Bella leaped up to hug Emmett and thank him enthusiastically.

"Um… no offense, Bella," Rosalie interrupted her thank you's, "But aren't you a bit clumsy? How are you going to keep that thing going?"

"Ah," Emmett answered, "But that's where the ingeniousness of the thing comes in. She can't trip if she isn't walking!"

"Interesting theory," Rosalie mused. "I should like to be there when we test it."

This scared Bella a teeny bit.

Esme went next, giving her a huge box full of baked goods, since she figured that neither Bella nor Charlie had gotten around to Christmas baking, which they hadn't.

Next, Carlisle gave Bella a first aid kit. A really nice one. Edward liked it very much. Carlisle also gave Bella a bunch of cotton candy. Edward didn't like that so much.

Alice gave Bella a ton of gift cards, and Bella agreed she would go shopping with Alice to spend them some time as an additional Christmas present, though she made Alice acknowledge that they wouldn't spend the cards all at once.

After Alice promised this, Edward gave Bella a copy of Pride and Prejudice. Inside the flap, there was two scribbled in messages. One read:

Merry Christmas Bella!


The other, written far longer ago, said:

To Edward Cullen,

Happy Reading!

-Jane Austin

This gift delighted Bella to no end.

Last, but definitely not least, Rosalie. Rosalie gave her a slim wrapped present that Bella opened curiously.

It was a very nicely framed photo. The photo was none other than Edward. In his elf costume.

Edward's eyes went very wide upon hearing Bella's laugh and seeing the photo.

"No!" He said. "You can't have that!"

Edward attempted to kidnap the photo, but Rosalie smacked his hand away.

"Nuh uh," Rosalie said. "I went through a lot of trouble, hiring Emmett to take the picture and all. He risked his life, you know!"

Bella, surprising everyone, jumped up and hugged Rosalie.

Rosalie twitched, "Ok, enough now. You like it, I get it."

Bella smiled and sat back down.

"Hey," Emmett called, interrupting the happy chatter that had begun to break out. "I have presents for the rest of you. I didn't give you them earlier cause I was going to give one to Bella too… but that one disappeared mysteriously… I got you the scooter instead."

Emmett shot Edward a dirty look. Edward looked away innocently.

Emmett darted around the room then, handing the members of the Cullen family little boxes that shook ominously.

"Uh…. No offense, Emmett, but… yikes," Alice held up the box.

"OPEN THEM!" Emmett burst out suddenly. "I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER THEY'LL WILLINGLY STAY IN THERE! Coughcough… I mean… please open them. I can't take the suspense."

Giving him disbelieving looks, they slowly opened their increasingly fast bouncing boxes. As soon as the tops were off, squirrels leapt out and began darting around the room.

"RABID VAMPIRE SQUIRRELS?!!?!?" Rosalie shouted disbelievingly.

Emmett nodded proudly. "I've been training them for months."

"Funny," Edward said, watching his (he knew it was his because of the color of the collar) bounce of the lampshade, "They don't looked trained to me."

Emmett waved this away, "Meh. That's because they were cooped up and had too much energy."

"Sheesh, how long have you kept the things locked up in there, Emmett?" Alice asked.

"Just for about three minutes," Emmett answered casually.

The Cullens exchanged terrified glances.

"C'mere squirrels," Emmett called, clicking his tongue. "Gather 'round."

But they did not gather around.

No, for as soon as Emmett called them, they disappeared.

"On no, they're loose," Jasper groaned.

"No worries, they won't do anything bad," Emmett said.

Something crashed upstairs.

"Too bad," Emmett amended, still smiling. "Sorry I couldn't get you one, Bella."

Bella looked away from her horror filled gaze in the direction of the crash to look at Emmett. "That's ok. I don't think Charlie would have approved."

The doorbell rang.

"Speaking of," Esme said, jumping up.


Edward and Charlie were sitting in the living room silently. The others were bustling around the kitchen with last minute preparations. Edward had been elected to stay with Charlie.

"So," Charlie said at last.

"Yes?" Edward looked at him.

"What are your plans for the future?" Charlie asked.

Edward opened his mouth to reply, but Charlie continued, "Which collage do you want to go to? What careers are you considering? Where do you want to live? Do you have a criminal record? What's your favorite color?"

Edward raised an eyebrow, just as Bella burst in the room, looking horrified. "DAD!"

"What?" Charlie said. "I just had a few questions."

Bella scowled. "Dinner's ready."

"Wonderful," Edward said, standing. The three walked into the dining room and sat, Edward sitting far from Charlie.

Just after they said they're Christmas prayer and started serving, an ominous scratching started in the ceiling.

The Cullens and Bella exchanged panicked glances, while Charlie looked up at the ceiling curiously.

"What could that be?" He mused out loud.

"Mice, probably," Carlisle said. "We really need to do something about them."

The scratching started in the floor and walls too.

"They sound pretty big for mice…," Charlie said.

"They aren't squirrels if that's what you're thinking!" Bella blurted, unable to stop it.

Charlie eyed her curiously, but said nothing.

They continued with dinner. The scratching provided an excellent way for the Cullens to slip food under the table into strategically placed buckets whenever Charlie glanced around nervously.

It worked very well, until that is, just after everyone had finished. They're plates were empty and they were just about to head to the living room for coffee and whatever.

Then it happened.

Something fell from the ceiling onto Charlie's plate. A red eyed Rabid Vampire Squirrel.

Charlie screamed.

The squirrel screamed.

Charlie screamed some more.

The Cullens watched in horrified fascination.

The squirrel (Jasper's, by the way) burst into the Kim Possible theme song.

Charlie fainted.

Even more LATER

"Oh good, you're awake," Bella said. They were now in the living room.

Seeing Charlie had revived, Esme went with Jasper to get desert.

Charlie blinked.

"You had quite a scare there," Carlisle said. "I'm terribly sorry about that falling star."

"Falling star?" Charlie repeated.

Carlisle nodded. "Yes, the star that fell from the ceiling onto your plate. You see, Alice loves to put up those glow in the dark stars on the ceiling."

Alice nodded, "One came loose. Unfortunately, it was right above you."

"But… I thought it was a singing squirrel," Charlie protested.

Carlisle smiled sympathetically. "Since there are no squirrels here and squirrels can't sing-"

"Well," Emmett coughed.

Carlisle shot him a look and continued. "I would have to say it was a delusion your mind made up. Again, I'm terribly sorry."

Esme and Jasper started passing desserts.

Charlie nodded and accepted a piece of pie.

Bella, sitting next to Edward on the couch, smiled. She laughed quietly as a squirrel whizzed across the ceiling, whispering in a tiny voice "heheheheheeeee' that no one but she and Edward noticed.

"Some interesting Christmas," Edward chuckled, giving her a half smile.

"One of the best ever," Bella grinned, toasting him with her mug of cider.

The End

Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed!!!!!!

Disclaimer: Twilight is Stephanie Meyer's. Pride and Prejudice is Jane Austin's. Kim Possible is Disney's. The squirrels are mine :D MWHAHAHAhahaha!!