Timeline: 5.21 - Meridian
A/N: I've been writing a lot of fanfiction around quotes from the show. I know this. But they just seem so obvious.
Beta: Insane Vampiress
Disclaimer: Um, not mine? If the were, Janet would still be around.
He's braver then anyone she's ever known, and being a military doctor, having seen everything she has, that's saying something. There's nothing anyone can do now except be there for him until the end and she feels so damn inadequate just standing there monitoring his vitals, knowing that it is just going to get so much worse. Yet he manages to still smile, as though he doesn't know he's dying. She's considered offering to end it more times then she can count already and she knows she'll think about it again and again before this is over. But in the end, the suggestion won't pass her lips because it would be cruel, knowing what kind of man Daniel Jackson is, knowing he'd never accept. He would consider it, but he'd never decide to allow her to help him to end his life any sooner than it's going to, no matter what the cost will be to him for those few hours. Janet's trying to keep herself together, calling on all her training, but she's never been one to use the emotional distance many of her colleagues keep, and the truth of the matter is that one of her friends is going to die.
No one's really saying anything, but she can tell General Hammond's still expected to try and maintain the relationship with Kelowna, even though everyone at the SCG knows they're lying through their teeth about how Daniel got the radiation poisoning. She's tempted to go let her CO know exactly what she thinks of what he's doing, but she's sure Colonel O'Neill already has, it's not up to him either. He's just following his orders and he probably did everything in his power to change them. But the damn bureaucrats can't see any further than the potential power of the naquadria, thanks to Sam, and wouldn't have given any more than a passing thought to the suffering Daniel's going to endure. Not like her, who can't think of anything else. Never, in her entire career, has she ever been this ashamed of her leaders like she is now. She understands like no one else here how bad it's going to get for him, and aside from the drugs which have already stopped doing much, there is absolutely nothing she can do for him and it makes her sick.
She'd resign if she thought it would change how her superiors treat the Kelownan situation, but Janet knows how the US military works and it wouldn't make a damn bit of difference. They'd just replace her and the only people she'd be hurting are the ones in her care. Which she won't do, certainly not to make a point.
But it's like she told Sam, "It goes against everything I've been trained to do, but the truth is, he'd be a lot better off if I..."