Author's note: Sam has a four dimensional pocket because he's an adventure game character. Yeah, I know it's cheesy.

Chapter 7: Ravenholm is not a place where we go anymore

Sam felt a bit disoriented, as if a valuable part of his existence was replaced with something sick and twisted. This is normal since it was the first time his particles were separated from each other. After fully materialized, he looked around, it was a normal busy city street, without the normal or the busy. It was quiet, and it was dumpier than City 17. Max was nowhere to be seen, he remembered that Max jumped into the teleporter at the split second they dematerialized.

Body parts are scattered everywhere, like in a movie theatre. "Max woulda loved this place" said Sam to himself, wondering where the hell Max—

"I am loving it, Sam. It's like a movie theatre" said a voice. Sam looked around, he was sure that was Max's voice, but the little guy was nowhere to be found. "Max, where are you, little buddy?" called Sam. "Behind you, Sam" said Max.

Sam looked behind him; his back looked an awful lot like Max.

He soon realized that Max was now attached to his back, like siamese twins. "Max, you confounded fool, our particles must've joined together, forming a freakshow with a dog and a rabbit's head!" said Sam.

"I prefer the term 'conjoined freaks'" said Max. "Can't we just use the crowbars we found to de-conjoin ourselves?"

"Nope, I seem to have dropped them while we were in the teleportation chamber. Right now we better get outta here; the lack of hygiene here is making me nauseous" said Sam. "And these severed body parts are making me hungry" said Max.

They walked down the street, ignoring the dead bodies and moaning zombie sounds around them. "Max, I'm not sure this place is safe to be around in" said Sam. "Neither is our office, but we have no problems there" said Max.

Sam continued walking down the road, the place got creepier, darker and bloodier each step. Also, he came upon a weird creature, kind of like a zombie, only skinnier and more vicious-looking. The creature looked at them and started charging.

Sam reached into his pocket (which seems to fit even the largest of junk) and pulled out his revolver, he shot the beast, but it only seems to stun it a bit. "Aim for the head Sam! Aim for the head!" yelled Max, who's facing an opposite direction because he's still stuck on Sam's back. Sam shot the creature's head, and it died instantly.

"Wow, Max, how did you know these zombies' weak spot, Max?" asked Sam.

"Zombies? I thought you were shooting at ducks!" said Max.

Sam heard something. "Wait, did you hear something, Max?" said Sam.

"I have these long ears, of course I hear things"

"No, no, you adorable ignoramus. It's like a laugh, someone's laughing"

Then the laugh became louder, "Oh, yeah. I hear it now, it's probably Santa" said Max.

Then the laugh stopped, a figure appeared in the rooftop of a building nearby. It was a man; bald head, humble clothes, a gun.

"They call me Father Grigori. Who, may I ask, are you to trespass my field of bad memories?" he said.

"I'm Sam, he's Max, we're conjoined freaks" said Sam.

"And we grow freakier by the second" added Max.

"Well, I don't get many visitors around here anymore" said Grigori.

"Yes, probably the lack of hygiene got the worst of them" said Sam.

"And the lack of snack bars" added Max.

"No, actually the zombies scared half of them away, and ate the other half" said Grigori. "I have set some traps around the place, but be careful not to get trapped yourself!" with a hearty laugh, he disappeared.

"I get it, it's just like using mousetraps! Only bigger and better" said Max.

"Also, you use it to trap someone other than yourself this time" said Sam.

Sam decided that he would go to the direction Father Grigori was going, Max decided to do nothing; since he was stuck on Sam's back he wouldn't need to walk anyway. The normal zombies are slow and almost blind, so it was actually easy to ignore them.

Then came the big zombie, who was actually faster and a bit more difficult to ignore. Sam started backing away, he didn't want to waste ammo on a lowly being like this (ironically, he'd waste it on rats that live in his apartment).

Nearby, a weird contraption was present. It has a lever, gears and other types of doohickey. "Max, I'm curious about the inner workings of this thing" said Sam pointing at the contraption. "Whatever it is, be thankful that you're not the cat who got killed by curiosity" said Max.

Sam pulled the lever, which caused some mechanisms to move. Seconds later a car fell down from nowhere, crushing the zombie with its metal toughness.

"So this is what those mousetraps are like" said Sam.

"Do it again, I wasn't looking!" Said Max, who was still stuck looking at the opposite direction.

In another place, a one legged-man welcomed a visitor named Gordon.