Yup, longest prologue in existence. But DO give it a chance!

Prologue: Seeing is Believing

"So. That the place?" Naruto looked out from inside the van.

"That's the place." Shino confirmed, having to lean in between the two seats, as the van only had two windows.

"Jesus, that's just fucked up creepy! Who still keeps a house like that around anyway?" Kiba bellowed from the passenger's seat, trying to hide how terrified he was.

"All the more reason to believe it's haunted." Shino slid the car door open and stepped out into the cool night air.

Kiba groaned, banging his head on the headrest. "Dammit! Why did you guys have to pick midnight to go ghostbusting? Wouldn't noon have sufficed? Or maybe three? Yeah, I heard three is the devil's hour!" Kiba laughed sarcastically.

Naruto chuckled. "No, that's three in the morning. But you know; that actually isn't a bad idea." The blond pressed his chin in thought. "We can always wait three more hours…"

The brunette completely paled upon hearing that, waving his arms about. "You can't be serious! Do that and I'm not buying you ramen for a year!" He all but screamed.

"Jeez, relax dog breath. It was just a joke." He was still snickering when he pulled out the car keys from the ignition and stuffed them in his pocket. "Come on before Shino starts giving us the silent treatment again." Naruto stepped out as well.

Kiba was debating with himself on whether he should just stay in the van or go run the risk of a heart-attack for the tenth time that week. He looked at the house and shivered. The moon played a ghostly glow upon the decrepit mass of terror.

What was worse, it was midnight; therefore the suburbs were completely deserted. No one even bothered to install streetlights in that part of the neighborhood. Kiba was sure he was going to have a coronary at one point in the night.

He rubbed his forehead and sighed. "The things I do to take you on dates Hinata." He muttered to himself.

"You better not have pissed yourself again, I just I got that seat reupholstered!"

"Oh fuck you!" Kiba yelled back, finally getting out of the van with frozen feet.

Naruto was still laughing as he helped Shino get their equipment from the back of the van. "So, remind me of our status again?" He grunted as he pulled out a particularly large suitcase.

"Neighbors called to report noises. We come in and deal with it." Shino said in monotone. "Actually, it has been happening for some time now, but the neighbors just dismissed it as their imagination." There was a bitter edge to his tone. He didn't like it when people refused to believe in what they couldn't see.

Naruto yawned, "Didn't figure it was gonna be so straightforward. We could have let Kiba stay home and save him from potential soakage." He chuckled. Shino wished he could.

"Hey! I heard that you asshole!" Kiba hollered, adding noise to the otherwise silent night.

The brunette was still grumbling as he slid the door open and reached in to pet his dog. "Hey boy, we're here. Wake up so you can protect daddy from all the ghoulies and the ghosties and the vamp…ies!." He cooed, rubbing the dog's fur.

Akamaru groaned a canine groan but immediately sat up upon feeling his master's touch and licked his face. The dog bolted from the van, prancing jovially on the pavement, not at all sharing in his master's insecurities.

"Hehe, Akamaru's still got more balls than you Kiba." Naruto grinned, kneeling down to pet the pooch, who tried to lick his face right off.

"And their certainly bigger too." Shino added, lugging a particular piece of equipment. Since no one could see what lay behind the collar of his orange jumpsuit, they could only imagine that he was smirking.

Kiba huffed rather cutely under the moonlight. "Will you two stop making fun of me and get this damn party started already?" Akamaru jumped circles around him. "I just wanna go home and comfort my Hinata." He stated dreamily, hands clasped under his chin.

"Fine, fine, fine. Wouldn't wanna keep you from your woman." He said, though he knew exactly who wore the pants in that relationship. "Got everything Shino?" He asked, finally being serious.

"Yes. PKE meters, check." He handed a case over to Naruto who took it. "Wave sensor, check." The man pulled up a large square device on wheels. Kiba gripped the handle. "And photon packs…"

"Check, check, and check." Naruto assured as he slung the backpack-like device on his shoulders. Shino handed Kiba his own who already had his. Naruto put his hands together and took a deep, calming breath. "Well, guess we're ready." Naruto turned to face the old, abandoned house as his teammates did the same.

It was quite an impressive structure, even more so with its heavenly spotlight. The house was three floors of dilapidated oak wood that was likely rotting to the core and just ready to collapse. Leafless trees littered its surroundings, its branches reaching every which direction like talons going for a kill. They served to add more substance to the already bleak atmosphere. No matter what time it was, the estate was said to always have this black cloud over it, seemingly in perpetual darkness.

"They say this house has been sitting here for the past two-hundred years." Shino calmly stated. "Though no one's really managed to settle in there, for obvious reasons."

Kiba was practically wobbling on his knees, Akamaru drooling beside him. "Way to psyche me up Shino. You know I'm a freaking pussy when it comes to this stuff." The brunette actually admitted.

Shino shrugged. "My bad."

"Eh, no harm, no foul. As long as you've got your rubber pants on, everything will be just breezy." And the laughter commenced once more.

Kiba hit Naruto upside the head. "Will you just stop dammit? Why do you have to so mean to me? It's not my fault I'm asthmatic and afraid of dark places and cockroaches and…"

Naruto extended his arms in front of him, trying to keep Kiba from full on showering him. "I'm sorry dude! Really! Calm down already! You're gonna make me we-" He was cut off when his eyes wandered to a window, seeing something he couldn't really place.

His hands fell to his sides when he saw the faint contours of a face, parting the curtains ever so slightly.

When he noticed the odd look on Naruto's face, Kiba stopped babbling. "Hey? You okay dude?"

"Yes. You look like you've seen a ghost." Shino said, wishing there really was a ghost and not another bust. The man looked to where Naruto was facing, and saw nothing out of the ordinary.

Naruto blinked upon hearing his friends' voices, seeing that whatever it was was gone. Great. Now I'm seeing things. It was probably just some splash of moonlight on the glass.

Naruto was skeptical, for the truth was he didn't really believe in the paranormal. While Shino was dedicated, and Kiba believed enough to be absolutely terrified of them, Naruto hadn't an inkling that ghosts existed. They had been in the business for four months and still they had never found anything substantial. That didn't stop Kiba from urinating himself on every failed adventure though.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine." He reassured his friends who were staring at him with concern. He realized that he had been frozen on the spot for nearly a minute. "I thought I saw something. I guess it was just the moon." His friends were still looking at him, but they shrugged it off, picking up their equipment.

"If you say so. You looked like you were gonna piss your pants though." The brunette froze momentarily. "No! I take that back!" He instantly faced Naruto, demanding the blond to forget what he just said.

When it seemed like Naruto was going to dish another scathing insult, he just smirked and faced the house once more. "Ah forget about it dog face. Now let's go roast this puppy!" He declared to the night, lightening the mood.

Akamaru whimpered.

With that said the trio and dog marched to the house. One was determined, one was unsettled, one was barking reassuringly to the one who was unsettled, and the last was deep in thought.

If that really was just the moon… Naruto peered up at the glowing ball in the sky, narrowing his eyes and frowning. …why did it look so…cute?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The face in question left its place by the window and levitated to the center of the room, as well as the chair he sat on.

"What did you see Sasuke? What did you see?" The thin, tan spirit was jumping about on his own chair, floating up and down in obvious excitement.

The raven haired ghost smirked, for not even Kidomaru's frequent outbursts could ruin his mood. "I believe we have guests and not the ones who just ring the doorbell and run away."

A redhead by the name of Tayuya snarled as she was perched or her dusty, mite infested throne. "I fucking hate it when they do that! I swear if I could touch those little bastards I'd wring their necks and when their dead, I'll bring them back to life and kill them again!" The girl screamed in unreasonable fury.

"Whoa, whoa Tay, you better watch that temper, Satan might decide he wants you back." Sakon, a dead man whose hair was as pale as his see-through skin laughed manically while Tayuya, in perpetual rage, initiated a chair war with him.

They had completely forgotten about Sasuke who was currently about to pop a vessel, though that was impossible for blood was but a memory.

"Please serene yourselves my friends, for if you don't, I'm afraid Sasuke might fall into a second death." Another ghost who lay on a floating couch was Jirobu, who seemed to be the spirit of Buddha himself.

Sakon immediately stopped laughing, Tayuya stopped raging, and Kidomaru stopped being a complete imbecile. The three fell in line in front of Sasuke, who was their self-appointed godfather. They awaited his words of wisdom.

"As I was saying; I believe the living have finally come to get rid of us." Sasuke calmly stated, his fingers coming together. "From the looks of their equipment, and unless their here to exterminate roaches, I believe my analysis is accurate." Most of the room nodded along.

It didn't take long before Kidomaru broke down in glee. "We're gonna smite the living! We're gonna smite the living! We're gonna smite the living …"

"As much as it pains me to say it, I'm afraid I share in our retarded friend's optimism." Sakon said with a smirk. "Don't you? Sasuke?" He leaned closer to his leader, smiling expectantly.

Sasuke could only remain impassive for so long before a small smile graced his translucent cheeks. As much as he hated to admit, he was excited at the chance of finally getting some new toys to play with. There was only so much a dead teenager could do for entertainment.

"Oh my fucking GOD!!" Tayuya shrieked, which was really what she did best. Kidomaru was still singing in the background. "Is our evil overlord Sasuke smiling?!" She growled it out as if it was the most offensive thing she ever said. "And will you fucking stop making that noise?!" She crashed her chair into Kidomaru's with a smash.

"Shut up Tayuya." Sasuke mumbled in annoyance. "I think we can afford to have some fun. I'm sure you all agree with that."

Sakon and Kidomaru grinned, while the latter was being pummeled by Tayuya. Jirobu, however, looked like he had swallowed a bug. "It brings my decaying heart multitudes of joy to see our dear lord Sasuke smile as if he lives once more. But me thinks it would be wiser and more pleasing to God, if we made peace with the living instead of allowing our env-"

"Oh shut up you fucking fatass!" Tayuya sneered in between Jirobu's soft-spoken speech. She had Kidomaru in a headlock. "You just want us to leave them alone so you can have them all to yourself and eat them! Isn't that right fatso?!"

Jirobu turned beet red, despite the fact that he had no skin. "That is a very hurtful thing to say my dear Tayuya." The large ghost sniffed.


"Hurtful eh?! It only hurts because it's true eh fatass?!" She squeezed tighter on Kidomaru's neck, his eyes bugging out. "I bet you died because of indigestion! Don't you fucking deny it!"


"You know, I have always wondered about that." Sakon said thoughtfully, "Though I never would have pegged his death on cannibalism. Plus points on creativity Tayuya." Sakon nodded in recognition. He turned to Tayuya. "I always thought you died because of some random STD, by the way."


"What did you say?!" The redhead rounded on Sakon, who was laughing again. "What did you fucking say?!" Kidomaru's eyes were just about ready to pop off.


Jirobu had his face in his hands, crying ghostly tears. "All I ever wanted was to steer you all to the path of God and to the road of heaven. And this is the thanks I get? Oh woe is me!" The fat man sobbed, couch bobbing up and down.


"Tayuya…you're hurting me…" Kidomaru choked out, afraid that he was going to die. Again.

"WILL ALL OF YOU FUCKING SHUT UP?!!" Sasuke screamed, getting up from the ugly lazy boy which fell to the floor. Seriously, what could he have possibly done in his life that deserved him eternity of torture with these idiots. Surely hell wasn't as bad as people said it was.

"Hey you guys? D'you hear something? It sounded like something fell!"

The ghosts froze even more after hearing the voice just outside the door.

Tayuya slowly let go of Kidomaru's windpipe while the others just stayed motionless. Even Sasuke was listening intently.

"I know one's imagination runs amuck when they are terrified, but wait till we are inside the house Inuzuka." It was a deeper voice that time, almost monotonous.

"What? I swear I heard something! You heard it too right boy?"

He was answered with a bark.

"I'll take that as a no. Now will you step aside Kiba so I can open door?"

It was the last voice that Sasuke liked best. It wasn't annoying like the first one and not cold like the other. Sasuke smiled, he was going to like tormenting the last one.

It felt like centuries since the five ghosts of the unnamed estate had a chance to haunt anyone. Sadly, they were but constricted to the confines of the estate, till a time when God would see them worthy or when Satan would deem them due for a barbecue. Needless to say, they were anxious, and to think that spirits could afford to be patient.

The raven slowly scanned around the room, nodding to his friends. Kidomaru grinned while Tayuya punched her palm intimidatingly. Sakon smirked and nodded too. Jirobu, ever the killjoy, bowed his ectoplasmic head in shame, but submitted nonetheless.

Sasuke couldn't help rubbing his hands in anticipation. He was getting bored not being able to leave the house, but as long as the fun remained inside, it was okay.

He didn't know that his afterlife was about to change forever.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Naruto jiggled the doorknob, but not too hard, for it looked like it was going to fall off any second.

Kiba was fruitlessly rubbing his arms, despite the fact that he was wearing three layers of clothing. He couldn't shake the biting chill that he felt was less a byproduct of the cold midnight breeze and more of something else. "Hey blondie, what's the holdup? If you haven't noticed, I think the blood up my ass is frozen!" Kiba whined.

"I think the door may be locked." Shino offered the obvious.

Naruto gave up with a sigh as the knob just wouldn't give. It was probably rusted from the inside. "Well, guess there's nothing left to do but…"

Without warning, it only took one powerful kick to send the door off its hinges and fall to the floor with a dusty thud.

"Godammit!" Kiba yelled in between coughs. "A heads up would have been appreciated you asshole!" The brunette wheezed. That was so not good for his asthma.

"Yes. You scared me."

Both boys regarded Shino incredulously, who still managed to look like he had a stick up his ass. Naruto shook his head and scratched behind his neck. "Hehe…sorry bout that Keebster. I didn't know my own strength."

Akamaru woofed and padded under Naruto's legs, into the house.

"Hey! Wait up boy!" Kiba exclaimed, lugging the equipment along. "You're supposed to be protecting daddy!" He also vanished into the darkness.

Shino sighed behind his collar.

"Sometimes, that Kiba is as moody as a chick." Naruto scratched his head.

"Yes." Shino stepped over the fallen door. "Now let's go." He was gone as well.

The blond took a breath and nodded, stepping into the house, machinery still strapped to his back.

He stepped through the portal to find Kiba and Shino frozen in the middle of what seemed to be the living room. Even Akamaru seemed calmer than usual.

Naruto didn't really know what the big deal was. It was just like any other seemingly haunted house they had ventured to in the last four months. From what could be seen with the aid of the moonlight that streamed through the thin curtains, dust billowed with every step they took. The wood creaked and seemed to be on the verge of collapse. Furniture was scattered about the room, there were five in total. A badly patched couch lay against a wall, while two chairs sat next to eachother without a table. A loveseat was nestled at the center, dirty fluff sprouting from the holes on the upholstery. His eyes caught on the lazy boy sitting near the window. Naruto wondered if there had been anyone on that spot just minutes before.

"God, this place sucks!" Kiba's shout brought the blond out of his musings. "What's up with all the furniture? To think that whoever used to live in this place would have a table at or a picture at least."

What Kiba said was true. The room was completely devoid of anything other than the chairs and the couch. It was far too boring to even be creepy, as even Kiba hadn't ran for the hills. It was once again another routine case, Naruto thought with a sigh.

The blonde set the photon pack unto the floor, adjusting his shoulders. Those things were heavy. "Why do we even bother bringing these Shino? It not like we ever use them."

"We never know when we might need them Naruto." Shino also put down his photon pack and went to adjusting the wave sensor.

Kiba wasn't listening, just going around the little room, Akamaru in tow. "You know, with a few touch ups, this place really isn't so bad." He rubbed the ugly green couch with a wince; it was rough. "Okay, maybe I'd lose the furniture."

Shino looked up as the square contraption blared to life. "Kiba, please stop talking like a real estate agent and hand us our PKE's." Shino demanded in monotone, standing up.

Kiba pouted and threw the briefcase he was holding unto the loveseat. He unfastened it, opened it, and took out one among the three gameboy-like devices inside. "All I was saying was that this place would be better than the crappy dorms." He grumbled, flicking on a switch which turned on the LCD. "Since no one owns this shithole, then we can probably afford it. If its not haunted that is." He added, looking around the room in slight apprehension.

Shino took his own PKE. "If you think I'd be willing to room with you Inuzuka, then you are sadly mistaken." The device went on with a beep.

Kiba narrowed his eyes at the taller boy. "You know, an 'I'm not interested' would have sufficed." The brunette turned away, sniffling comically.

Naruto chuckled, reaching for the last PKE. "Party's over boys. Back to work." Naruto said with derision. He really had no reason to complain, if it paid the bills then it was fine.

"Yeah, yeah." Kiba went off to a corner of the room, scanning his PKE on whatever surface before turning to the other boys nervously. "Um, we don't have to split up…do we?"

Shino stared at him briefly before going back to scanning his own patch of wall. "No. We can just do this room for tonight. The other floors can wait."

Kiba loudly released a breath in relief. "Oh thank God!"

Naruto wanted to laugh, or at least say something. But for some reason, he felt awfully…subdued, sort of uneasy. He couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching him. He should have been accustomed to that feeling, with the job he had. But he had never actually felt uneasy in an abandoned house before. He knew it was a bad sign when he was weirded out and not Kiba.

He shook the thoughts away and concentrated on doing his job, ignoring the nagging chill in his spine.

Fifteen minutes past of them just moving around the room, feeling for any supernatural presence with their meters. There was none, not even a pulse.

Until something happened to Shino that immediately shot his brows to the sky.

"Um, guys. Something's happening."

The two other boys had already rushed to Shino's side when his meter started ringing loudly.

"This…is unusual. According to my meter, the readings are impossibly high." Shino said in hushed tones.

"That's impossible." Naruto insisted, raising his own meter for them to see. "Mine's shooting blanks!"

At that instant, Naruto's PKE blared just as loudly as Shino's.

Kiba's eyes widened at his own PKE, and threw it to the floor like it had sprouted tentacles, not willing to see the readings spike and prove that for once, they were not alone. "Okay guys, this is seriously disturbing." Kiba backed up to the wall, breathing hard. "This has never happened before!" Just when he thought it was going to be another routine trip, this happens!

Naruto just glared at his PKE, though it refused to shut up. He obviously didn't know what to believe. He liked to think it was just some mistake with the equipment, but with two PKE's buzzing simultaneously, it just didn't seem possible. But he sure as hell wasn't believing in no ghost until he saw it!

Shino was also at a loss. He didn't actually know what to do if the house was haunted.

They were startled when Akamaru started barking aggressively to the air, drowning out the sounds of their meters. The machines weren't the only things that knew when a presence lurked. Kiba's eyes were roaming around, just waiting for a head to pop up right from the walls.

Shino's eyes returned to his device, speaking slowly. "According to the readings, this room is literally drenched in supernatural activity. We are practically surrounded."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

And indeed Shino was right.

"Seriously, damn mutt is pissing me off." Sakon said beside Akamaru who was barking directly at him. He walked around the dog, which seemed to know where he went at all times, barking right at him. "It's damn smart though." Sakon smirked, trying to pet it though his hand went right through the dog's skull. Akamaru whimpered at the strange sensation.

"Make it shut up! It's making my fucking ears bleed!" Tayuya screeched, making quite a lot more noise than the dog. "Jirobu." She glanced at the fat ghost still on the couch, batting her lashes sickeningly. "Would you help your dear, sweet Tayuya and eat the bitch? Pwetty pwease!" She cooed. Sakon gagged.

Jirobu narrowed his eyes in response, crossing his arms and looking away. "I will not be fooled by your sweet guise of innocence my dear Tayuya. And I refuse to ev-"

"Oh just shut up Fat Albert! I was just kidding!" She glanced at the two boys, the blond and the one wearing shades, talking amongst themselves in whispers. The brunette was still plastered to the wall. She licked her lips. "You know, the blond is pretty cute. Fucking gorgeous actually! But the girly one is fine too. How I wish my genitals were still alive." She said dreamily to the sky. "What do you think Sakon?"

The pale man/ghost thought about it while kicking a whimpering dog with his translucent foot. "Personally, I'd go for the one in shades. Wearing sunglasses at night is just so…fetching. How bout you Sasuke, who do you thi-"

His voice trailed off as the answer was right in front of his eyes, causing him to smile as if he had just been told some juicy secret. Sasuke still sat on his couch by the window, moonlight streaming through his ectoplasm. His fingers were digging through the armrests from the way he was staring at the blond boy with such fascination and…was it need?

"What?" Tayuya demanded, wondering why Sakon was suddenly silent. "What are you thi-" She trailed off as well as she followed Sakon's gaze and her eyes found her master, comprehension dawning. "Oh…"

It was a wonder how spirits could practically molest a human and they wouldn't feel a thing. The red hot intensity behind the Uchiha's eyes was enough to have burned the blond right where he stood. No doubt the man could feel some of the heat that Sasuke was sending him. It was obvious from the way his fingers would clench and of the sweat pouring down the side of his face. He was aware of their presence, he just wasn't aware that he was aware.

Kidomaru, as usual, was oblivious to the significance of the Uchiha's sudden interest. He was bouncing on his feet once more. "Come on already! What are we waiting for?! Let's smite the-."

"No." Sasuke cut in with a deep edge to his tone.

The rest of the room fell silent, cep't for the murmurs of the humans and their dog.

Sakon peered at him incredulously. Was he denying them their fun? After all, what other chance would they get? "Um…don't mean to be rude Sasuke, but…come again?" He asked with bitterness he didn't know he possessed.

Jirobu was clapping his hands.

Sasuke ignored his tone, or for the most part his words. "We won't hurt them, I won't allow it. For if we do that, they'll leave, and we can't afford that." The raven smiled maliciously.

Sakon could feel his heart return from the grave and beat like a drum. Thank God Sasuke wasn't restraining them; Sasuke just didn't want to hurt them. He grinned and turned to Kidomaru, who was ecstatic. "You heard him Kido, just don't hurt them kay?"

Tayuya snickered, rubbing her hands together. "Let's give them a show they'll never forget boys, and let's make sure they come back for more." She turned to an unaware Naruto, throwing him a ghostly kiss. "Especially you handsome."

Jirobu looked like he had just come back from hell.

Kidomaru screamed in delight, floating over to Kiba who was still panting against the wall.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Whatever's happening, it's not going away." Naruto looked down at Kiba's fallen meter, which was ringing madly in-sync with the others. "We should put on our photon packs, just in case something shows up." He wasn't gonna say ghost, he couldn't say ghost! He didn't believe in no ghost!

Shino nodded and made his way to the wave sensor before putting his pack back on.

"Kiba? You okay there buddy?" Naruto asked concerned for his friend who seemed at the doors of hyperventilation.

"Oh yeah! Just peachy! You know, I assigned for this job thinking it would be a breeze and here we are!" He was having a hard time fully leaning on the wall with the photon still strapped on his back. With the force he was giving, he wouldn't be surprised if he crushed it like a tin can. "And it was a breeze till our equipment starts picking up signals for the first time in four months!!"

Naruto didn't comment, not even to say that it was probably just a fluke, for he knew it wouldn't help.

He was sweating profusely and he couldn't for the life of him figure out why. There were so many holes in the house that ventilation was already a given. Not to mention that it was currently thirty digress. But he just couldn't stop sweating!

Naruto wiped at his forehead, trying to convince himself that it was normal to be so hot in the face and so cold everywhere else. Is this the chills that people mention whenever they talk about ghosts and haunted houses?

He tried walking around with his PKE, but the numbers just kept getting higher with each creaky step he took. He might as well be walking into some zombie brothel.

Kiba wasn't doing so well. He wasn't doing well at all!

Currently Akamaru was barking at him like he was some giant cat in a mailman suit and it was seriously freaking him out. He knew that dogs could sense things people couldn't even imagine, especially since his pet had been acting very strangely ever since the meters went off.

"It's weirding you out too eh boy?" Kiba hissed. "I know what you feel, sort of. But you better be quiet or el- WHAT THE FUCK!!"

The other boys instantly reacted to the sound of wood breaking as well as Kiba's scream, which was immediately followed by a hard and painful thud. Akamaru barked and jumped in shock.

"What the hell?" Naruto yelled, rushing to Kiba's side who lay face down on the floor. "Dammit dog-face, what the hell did you do?" He demanded, slightly concerned and partly amused.

Shino also kneeled beside him, not really doing anything until he was sure of what had just happened. "Kiba? Would you mind telling us what exactly happened?" He voiced his thoughts. "Why is your foot through the wall?" He had to ask.

Kiba didn't need help getting on his hands, groaning all the way. "It's not my fault godammit!" He coughed from the dirt on his nose. Akamaru started laving at his checks comfortingly. "One minute I was leaning on the wall, and then my knee just caves in!"

There was a hole in the wall where Kiba's boot had gone through it. Naruto swore he could hear laughter above him.

The boys helped the brunette pry his foot from the wood and helped him stand. Shino and Naruto shared a look while Kiba dusted himself off.

"Are you sure you didn't kick the wall on your own?" Shino asked. "Not really on purpose but maybe on impulse?"

"No! I already told you! I don't what the hell happened!" He seemed to be on the verge of tears. "So don't you pin this on me! I'm the victim here!" He pointed a finger accusingly at both his teammates.

Shino crossed his arms in contemplation. "It seems even Kiba suspects." He nodded.

Kiba's eyes went as wide as dinner plates. "Suspect? Suspect what? I'm not suspecting anything! Why are you looking at me like that?!" Kiba started to sniffle again, wanting nothing more than to just go home and make love to his girlfriend.

"As much as you hate to hear it Inuzuka, I think we have just had our first encounter with the paranormal."

"NOOOO!!!" Kiba exploded, his head in his hands. What a drama queen.

It didn't bother Shino one bit, for a grin the size of Saturn's rings hid behind his jumpsuit. Finally! He was getting the brake he deserved! He just knew being patient would pay off someday. He could just see himself dancing with the werewolves.

I don't believe in ghosts…I don't believe in ghosts…I DON'T believe in ghosts!

Even after what's happened, Naruto still couldn't accept the annoying little fact. Who could blame him? He just wasn't the believing type. He stubbornly attributed the thing with Kiba to some weird muscle spasm and not some paranormal encounter.

Kiba screamed for a whole different reason when he suddenly jumped to the air, hands going straight to his buttocks. He glared disbelievingly at Naruto who had been standing beside him. "Naruto? What the hell?!" He sputtered at the stunned blond. "I have a girlfriend dude! And I don't swing that way either!"

It was then Naruto's turn to sputter. "W-what?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Kidomaru leaped between each leg with glee, finally having gotten the chance to "smite" the living.

Sakon wasn't impressed and rolled his eyes. "Amateur." He crossed his arms, glaring condescendingly at the ghost with the ponytail. "I know you were aiming to exorcise him, but all you managed was to move his foot. How lame."

Kidomaru instantly stopped prancing and pouted at the pale man. Why did he always have to ruin his fun?

"Now if you want to see what a haunting really looks like…" Sakon suddenly stuffed his see-through hand up Kiba's ass, who leaped a mile into the air. He narrowed his eyes when he felt something he didn't expect. "Okay, wait a second." And then it was his head that went inside Kiba's rear. "Hey Tayuya, check it out." He called from within Kiba's rectum. "This guy is wearing four layers of underwear!"

"What? Really?!" She imitated Sakon with excitement, hiding her head like an ostrich. "You're fucking right! And is that Charlie Brown?!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, massaging his temples with his fingers. Idiots.

"That's fucking awesome! There's one for each of us!"

Kiba would never, ever know, of the night he had two ghosts looking up his ass.

Jealous, Kidomaru did the same thing to Shino.

"Hey! Is that a stick?"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The brunette was at that moment rubbing at his rear-end so furiously it could have left scorch marks. Akamaru whined at his master's bizarre behavior.

"Dammit Kiba! Why the hell would I pinch you?!" Naruto pleaded his case. If he was gay, he sure as hell wouldn't be coming out to Kiba!

"Yeah, yeah, shut up gayboy." Kiba winced, trying desperately to warm up his ass-cheeks.

"Inuzuka…what the hell are you doing now?" Shino asked, as always, in monotone. The night just kept getting progressively stranger. He was starting to doubt that the paranormal had ever been involved, and that Kiba was just insane. He figured that the PKE's must have picked up on the ghost of Kiba's brain and that was it.

"I don't know!" Kiba winced again, probably in pain. "I don't like talking about this with you guys but my ass is damn cold!"

Naruto had to raise an eyebrow at that and chuckled. "Well that's what you get dog-face for going commando." He scoffed.

The irked brunette glared embers at the blond. "Well for your information gayhole, I'm actually wearing fou-" Kiba immediately cut himself off when he realized that he didn't really want to disclose that information to his mates, cause then he would have to mention that he was only wearing them in case he wet himself…theoretically. "Um, never mind! Forget I said anything." His hands left his butt cheeks, they weren't cold anymore anyway, and walked away stiffly, his dog at his heels.

Naruto just gaped after him. Well someone is PMS-ing today!

Shino shook his head, afraid he was gonna die of a migraine before the night was over.

And yet another disturbance ensnared them of their thoughts and possible their sanity.

It was the wave sensor's turn to blare out of control. The box began emitting a green light and flooded the noiseless room with sounds of static. It was the type of thing that was bound to scare away ghosts.

"Well what do you know?" Shino said softly, approaching the box and kneeling down. "I think whoever or whatever is causing all this has something to say."

Kiba shivered involuntarily, swallowing the moisture in his throat, remembering the throb in his foot.

Naruto sighed and picked up his PKE, not really remembering when he dropped it. He padded to beside Shino and kneeled down, peering over the box. Kiba remained a few meters behind them, despite Akamaru's attempts to pull him closer.

"You hear anything?" Naruto asked the boy next to him.

Shino shook his head. Of course not, it was all static.

The wave sensor worked by picking up vibrations. While the PKE meter sensed psychokinetic energy, the sensor was better for sounds. Sound only dogs animals could hear. Ghostly sounds.

A break in the static alerted them that the machine had picked up something. "Listen, do you hear it?" Shino asked, his full attention on the machine. He jostled and turned buttons on the panel to get a better reception.

Naruto squinted his eyes. "Try turning the dial to the left, decrease the frequency." Shino nodded and did as he was told. The blond smiled at the results. "Perfect."

There was barely any static remaining, and the sounds that it picked up were slow and condensed, but audible.


That caught their attention, as even Kiba found himself moving closer, interested. It felt very much like a séance, only it was a one way phone call. They weren't really all that interested in speaking to whatever it was.


"What's she saying? What's she saying?" Naruto assumed it was girl, since most ghosts were girls. Not that he believed in them.

"I honestly don't know. We should wait for it; the machine needs time to pick up the full signal."


Naruto straightened his knees, not really believing what he thought he was hearing. "Okay…um, is she saying what I think she's saying?"

It only took a second for his suspicions to be confirmed.

fuck you…

Shino nonchalantly shutdown the machine with a press of a button, having about enough. "Inuzuka, you should really consider keeping that language of yours in check, and due make sure that the equipment doesn't pick up on it next time."

Kiba appeared scandalized. He looked to Naruto for support, who merely looked away. "Me?! Why is it always fucking me?!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Fuck, fuck, fuck FUCK!!" Tayuya screeched, no longer caring if the machine heard it or not.

Sakon was tapping his foot impatiently. All he wanted to do leave the petty pranks and start throwing some furniture. But noOoOoOo! Oh great almighty Lord Sasuke wouldn't let them! They were gonna leave before they'd ever get the chance to really play with them.

"Sasuke can we just-"

"No." was the curt reply.

"Damn fuck Uchiha! We're just gonna -"


"But Sasuke! I wanna smi-"


"Oh Lord Sasuke! May the peace of Go-"


Sakon growled in agitation. All he could do was watch as the boys were just beginning to pack their equipment, the brunette was still yelling to nothing in particular. He looked out the window and spotted the grubby old van the ghostbusters had come in. If they were already gonna leave anyway...he smirked, for an idea had dawned on him.

"Sasuke? Can we at least mess with their ride?" He asked in as level a tone as possible.

Sasuke sighed, seemingly thinking about it. He rested his chin on his knuckles, looking bored. "Fine. Whatever." The raven waved them off.

The three had already sped out of the house in a fraction of a second, laughing evilly like the ghouls that they were. Only Sasuke and Jirobu remained, who still refused to strain the bonds between the humans and the inhumanes.

Sasuke smirked at the momentary silence, really wanting to get rid of them so he could have some little fun of his own.

Fun directed at the cute little blond who never seemed to leave his gaze.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"That's it! I'm waiting in the van!" Kiba spat, marching in the direction. "I just figured out that I'm not really cut out for all this so I'll just leave you two to…WHAT THE FUCKING HELL?!"

Naruto released a haggard breath. Not again. He didn't even bother seeing what was up with the crazy brunette. Why should he care what happened to the person who claimed he was some gay maniac.

He would have gone anyway if it weren't for his PKE meter suddenly buzzing with a zest. The strange thing was that he swore he had turned the thing off.

It was Shino who came to Kiba's side at the doorway, but only because Akamaru started barking and he knew he could trust the pooch more than his owner. "What is it this time Inuzu-" His voice died in his collar when he realized that Kiba may not be so crazy after all.

Their van, the same one they used on the job, was currently trying to get off the ground. It was jumping, it was wobbling, it was dancing to some 80's disco tune that had just started blaring on their stereo.

Shino dug his hands into his pockets. Yup, still have the keys.

The two startled boys shared a meaningful glance before running hurriedly to their vehicle, Akamaru in tow. They had to do something before middle-aged housewives started batting them with rollers and husbands getting their rifles.

Completely unaware of the going-ons outside, Naruto remained in the house, alone, just staring at his PKE meter.

He wondered vaguely as to why it turned on by itself, but most of all, he wanted to know if their really was something in the house.

He checked the other PKE's and they weren't getting anything, and they were on! Naruto thought he must be getting some special treatment or something. Though Kiba was probably more deserving of that award.

The blond took a deep, long breath before deciding on what he was going to do. He didn't really believe in ghosts, but that didn't stop him from being curious.

"I can't believe I'm doing this." He said to himself. He couldn't believe what he was doing either when he started waving the device about, trying to find the strongest signal.

He found it, but he didn't like where it led.

The meter was literally screaming when he pointed it to the darkness of the hallway that led out of the room and deeper onto the house. He gulped, reminding himself that nothing could hurt him anyway, since ghosts didn't exist. He entered the darkness, completely blind cept for the green glow emitted by the meter.

He cursed when his knee hit something hard. He felt for it, and it was a small desk. His hands went higher, and felt the rungs of a banister.

With the PKE as his guide, he went up the stairs tentatively, watching each step he took. If I have to go one more floor I'm leaving! His silent wish was unanswered as the meter buzzed loudly upon arriving on the second floor.

Natural light was long gone then, as the moonlight was left behind in the living room, and there were no windows in the second floor hallway. He took note that the structure was a lot smaller on the inside than it was in the out, mostly cause it was more like a building than a house.

Creaks from the floorboards, hums from the meter, and breath from his lips were all the sounds needed in the cold, deserted hallway. He was just beginning to curse himself for forgetting to bring a flashlight!

He froze on his tracks at the noise that met him only a few doors down. The distinct sound of flushing wound around his psyche, throwing him off balance.

Relax Uzumaki, it's just a broken toilet. Probably does that every night.

His limbs felt like rubber and his head felt light as air as he waited for the flush to end, but it never did, the water just kept on running, like someone was holding down the lever…

Oh fuck oh fuck! Someone's in here! I knew it! Dammit! This could be some serial killers hideout or something!

The meter held in his sweaty fingers rose in volume, alerting him that whatever it was was NOT human.

With one final gulp, Naruto forced his feet to move, but like a cat so as not to alert whoever it was of his presence, even though the PKE was practically a foghorn in his palm. He moved slowly nonetheless, more from fear than from stealth. They had never investigated alone on their hunts; so he was just simply not used to the situation. Oh why did he choose to go alone?!

Getting short on breath, Naruto leaned on the wall beside the door like a cop waiting till it was safe to fire his gun. How he wished he did have a gun.

Without thinking further, Naruto rolled from the wall to face the bathroom.

By the light emitted from the device, he could just make out the tiny sink, to be followed by the still gurgling toilet bowl, and then a bathtub covered halfway by a dirty shower curtain. It was as normal and as dull as bathrooms could get.

He absentmindedly placed the PKE on the sink, making sure that it faced up so the room would be cast by a ghostly green. He stared at his reflection on the mirror that occupied one side of the room, the LCD light was making his eyes glow, it was very disconcerting.

He no longer knew what exactly he came there for as he stared down at the grimy basin that still continued to swallow the water that poured from the sides.

His eyes widened when it suddenly stopped with a guzzling sound, almost like a burp. He leaned down closer, though he didn't really know why. He just found it all so fascinating.

And then there was silence. His consciousness returned to him, why it had ever left him in the first place he didn't know. He had no time to ponder it further when an "Oh shit" left his cold, chapped lips.

His eyes automatically shut as a geyser hit him right in the face. Some of it even managed to get into his mouth as most of it went straight up his nose. His face took the abuse for a full five seconds before he started coughing, getting the musty liquid out of his lungs.

He saw himself in the mirror, completely drenched and panting heavily. But then he saw something else.

His breathing ended, making him want to gag as there was still water in his pipeline, but he could not look away from the image just over his shoulder. LCD light shouldn't be able to show all that much, but it apparently showed enough.

The pale face smirked at him, and he froze from head to toe.

I don't believe in ghosts…I don't believe in ghosts…I don't believe in ghosts…

Several blocks away, in a dorm room and on his nightstand, his clock rang 3.

Isn't Kiba just adorable! GLOMPS

So how was that for my first chapter? Assuming anyone actually read this far. Just going to say that everything else is mostly Naru and Sasu-centric. This is just a prologue and was only meant to be stupid.

This fic DOES have a story, trust me.