Dress in Drag
Of the many plans that James had hatched to get his Lily, this was the most ridiculous and the most humiliating.
"I can't believe I'm wearing this." Sirius nudged James in the ribs. "Why do I have to wear this again?"
"Because, you're supposed to look like a girl so you can sneak in and find out if Lily digs me!" James reminded him.
"I agree with Sirius. This is ridiculous!" Remus muttered under his breath.
"Remus, I can't agree more," Peter mumbled.
"Hey," James said, hurt, "I would do the same for you if you asked me."
"You would dress like this?" The remaining Marauders asked incredulously.
James took a careful look at their outfits. Peter was dressed in girl jeans and a sweater. Remus had gotten stuck in a short skirt and a t-shirt. And Sirius had gotten stuck with a dress.
They had all stuffed accordingly in the right places and done their best to look like girls: wigs, makeup and all…
"Well…" James began.
"That's all you really have to say."
"Alright," James said, clapping his hands together, "Let's go over the plan."
Sirius shot James a sour look. "I prance into the common room and ask for Lily. My cronies-" Here Remus gave an offended snort "-come in after me and we attack her with questions."
"And remember- don't indicate us in any way or the whole plan is blown!" James added.
"We know, Prongs, keep your shirt on!" Peter said, "We're going anyway."
The three Marauders shot each other glances. "Do you really want to do this," Remus asked in an undertone.
"No, I defiantly do not. I like my masculinity and I don't need to associate with my feminine side."
"You have a feminine side?" Peter snorted.
Sirius colored. "Everyone has a feminine side, Peter."
Peter continued to snicker until Remus hit him. "Shut up, you'll blow our cover."
"There's Lily!" Peter whispered.
"Go Sirius, go!" Remus gave Sirius a shove.
Sirius shot Remus a look. "I'm going to get you for that."
Sirius sashayed his way over to Lily.
"Um, excuse me, are you Lily Evans?" He asked in a breathy, high voice. He could hear Remus stifling laughter in the background.
"Yeah…" Lily said, looking at Sirius strangely. "Do I know you?"
"No, of course you don't!" Sirius laughed airily, "But I know you."
Lily's eyes bugged out. "Excuse me?"
Remus came to Sirius' rescure. "What she means is, Ja- um, we just want to know if you're interested in anybody."
Lily continued to stare at them as if they were insane. "I don't swing that way."
"Oh, not like that!" Peter came running over to save his friends. "Is thre any certain boy that you fancy?"
"Why are you asking me?" Lily's eye narrowed.
"Oh, no. We're in for it now." Remus whispered under his breath.
"I actually don't think you're girls. I think you're Sirius and Remus and Peter all dressed up as girls, and if I pulled on that sorry wad of hair you call a wig I bet it would come right off!" Lily stood up and faced them, "And yes, for the record I fancy somebody, and no, I'm not going to tell you even if it's JAMES!"
"C'mon guys," Sirius said, abandoning his airhead voice, "Let's go."
Remus and Peter followed out the portrait hole.
James was anxiously awaint them on the other side. "How'd it go?"
Sirius took off his wig and shook out his hair. "She figured us out, mate, sorry."
James bowed his head in defeat.
"But…" Remus said thoughtfully, "I actually think she fancies you. She called you by your first name."
James' face brightened. "That's great! Now, listen up, team, it's time for phase two…"