IT'S HERE! The sequel to please don't. If you didn't notice it is called 'say you love me'. Please read and enjoy.
To those who didn't read 'please don't' you probably should before you read this but if you don't want to go right ahead, you might be kind of lost though.
Disclaimer-I do not own Twilight, New Moon, or any of Stephenie Meyer's ideas.
I sat on the bathroom counter, leaning against the wall reading a book. I knew that the bathroom was a weird place to sit and read but it was the only place that I knew he wouldn't be watching. I knew that I sounded paranoid, but almost everywhere I was I would catch a glimpse of him or I would just get that feeling that I was being watched.
The summer had been tough, but I knew that the school year would be tougher. Over the school year I would possibly be forced to sit in an enclosed space with him and have to resist the urge to just stare at him. Over the summer I had gotten my mom to send me to two weeks of summer camp and after that I had gotten a job at a bookstore. That was where I had gotten the book I was reading now.
Today was actually a day that I should be working, but today was august twenty first, my birthday. The other workers had decided that it would be nice to give me the day off, if only they knew that they had forced me to hide in my bathroom.
My mother had left a couple of hours ago after apologizing profusely, and promising to bring home a cake.
The doorbell rang.
I reluctantly got off of the counter, put my book down, opened the door, and walked out. I opened the door and looked outside, I looked to the left and to the right, but no one was there. Then I looked down. A small wrapped box was on the ground. On the outside it said to-Cassie from-Rory.
I contemplated just leaving it there and not even bringing it inside, but curiosity got the best of me. I picked it up and took it inside closing the door. I walked to the kitchen and began to un-wrap the gift. Inside was a velvet box, of course he bought me jewelry. I opened the box, inside was a diamond encrusted charm bracelet with two charms; a heart and a key.
Under the bracelet there was a folded note. I picked it up and unfolded it. It read-
Happy Birthday Cassie!
You are the key to my heart.
I put the note back in the box, closed the box and brought it to my room, where I put it on my desk and walked back to the bathroom.
Rory didn't understand what it meant to try and 'get over' someone meant. I would be working in the bookstore and see him watching me sometimes. I also knew that he still visited me in my sleep because about three times a week I would get my dreams.
Over the summer, my dreams had been relatively redundant. It was mostly either me being dead, me being changed, or (most frequently) it was the meeting of the man and the woman on the cobble stoned street. The phone rang. I sat still to wait and see who was calling.
"Hi, you've reached Michelle and Cassie Sunnel. Please leave your name number and message and we'll get back to you as soon as possible." My mother's voice came from the machine followed by a beep.
"Hey Cass, it's your dad. I'm just calling to…" I got back off the counter and scrambled into the office to get the phone.
"Hello?" I asked.
"Hey there birthday girl." My dad said.
"Hi dad." I said. Knowing what he was didn't really change that he was my dad. "How are you?" I asked trying to act happy.
"I'm doing well, how is your birthday going?"
"Really good." I lied.
"Uh huh, what did you get?"
"Um, I got a bracelet and new P.J.'s." I said. It was good that Rory had given me the bracelet, it gave me something other that the P.J.'s from my mom to tell my dad.
"How come I don't hear a party there?" he asked.
"Because I didn't have one."
"Oh, well why not?"
"Didn't feel like it."
"Too old for that kind of stuff?"
"Err, yes." I lied. "Dad, do you think I could live with you this school year?" I asked. I had been thinking about it for a while. My dad's house was the only place that Rory wouldn't visit me.
"What?" he asked befuddled.
"Can I live with you for a year?" I repeated.
"Cassie, are you being serious?" he asked skeptically
"Why would you want to live with me?"
"Because," I said thinking quick on my feet." I feel like I'm not close enough with you dad."
"Oh, Cass, I'm sorry that you feel that way. I just don't think that it would be possible."
"Why not?" I asked.
"Well, I'm always traveling for one thing." He told me. But I continued to push the subject. I knew that somewhere Rory was listening and probably barely restraining himself from stopping my conversation. He would say that I was 'putting myself in dangers way'.
"You could have work around here." I said. "Or I could travel with you." I said hopefully.
"Alright, alright look Cass, I'll look into it and get back to you on it. Have you talked to your mother about it?"
"No." I said.
"Okay, then you does that and I'll get back to you. I've got to go, love you Cass."
"Love you dad." I said then hung up.
I really did want to get closer to my dad. I knew that he was going to call back and say no or was waiting for my mom to tell me that I couldn't go. I wondered what it would be like.
I put the phone back and got up.
This was pathetic. It was my birthday and I was hiding in my house. I got up and walked to my room. I picked up my cell phone and looked through my contacts. They were all people who I hadn't been friends with since the beginning of last year.
I was getting to the boy half of my list.
Nothing came to mind about him. And why not. He knew how to have a good time, and his middle name was practically party. I doubted he would say no. I pressed the call button.
It rang a few times and then he picked up.
"Hello?" he asked his slightly rough voice nice to hear.
"Hey Gabe, its Cassie." I stopped and waited to see if he was upset that it was me.
"Hello? Are you still there?"
"Yea." I said. "It's my birthday today and I was wondering if you would hang out with me?" I asked timidly.
"Yea sure. Wait, why aren't you with Rory?"
"Um, we broke up the last day of school." I said quietly.
"Oh, sorry, I don't have to get you a present do I? I'm sort low on cash."
"No, I just want to hang out."
"Oh, so where do you want to go?"
"I don't know. Somewhere fun."
"Say no more." He said in a superman voice. "I know just where to go."
"I'll pick you up at like six, 'kay?"
"Yup. I'll see you then."
I hung up the phone I felt better about myself now. The only problem was that I had no idea where we were going so I had no idea what to wear.
I had already showered that morning and I had about two hours to get ready. I opened one of my drawers.
After about forty-five minutes of sifting through countless garments I had chosen my outfit. I thought it was versatile enough. A pair of my favorite jeans with a cute tank top and a shrug.
I did my hair straight and my make-up soft and natural.
I still had fifteen minutes left though. I called my mom and told her what I was doing.
When I was done I walked to the kitchen and slipped on my converse. I sat at the table and couldn't help but think of Rory.
I really loved him. I thought that it was actually pretty smart that we had broken up. There was no point in staying together if the relationship was going nowhere. Sure I still loved him. But I couldn't help that. But he obviously didn't love me. At least not to a good enough extent. I just wished he would leave me alone. I was fairly convinced that he was just hanging around because… well, my old reason was that he was upset that he hadn't gotten to decide the break up and he had wanted to. But I knew that he wasn't that immature.
I didn't know why he was still hanging around. It didn't make sense to me. But I was certain that he didn't really love me.
No, I was certain. The doorbell rang I hopped off my chair to get it.
I threw the door open and was greeted by Gabe's annoyed expression.
"You do realize that I have been honking for the last five minutes." He said. I guess I had gotten lost in my thinking.
"Sorry" I said sheepishly.
I stepped out the door and closed it and followed him to the car. I got in and we drove with music blaring.
"How was your summer?" I shouted over the music.
"It was good, and yours?" he shouted back.
"It was okay." I replied. "Where are we going anyway?"
"Frank's end of summer party."
"'kay." I shouted though there was no reason because moments before he had shut off the music, so I just felt stupid. We were parked on the street behind twenty or so more cars. We got out and walked up to the door. We didn't bother knocking but went in. Inside there was more music playing.
I turned to look next to me but Gabe was gone. I walked a few feet before I heard his voice again.
"I got us drinks." He said, holding a red plastic cup of brownish liquid that I was pretty sure wasn't coke.
"I'll pass." I said remembering all too vividly my last experience with alcohol.
"Whatever" he said putting it down on a counter as we walked away. I pushed through the crowds of people while talking to Gabe. We got a few stares of curiosity. We ended up in a room that I guessed was the dancing room. I pulled Gabe in. it was pretty funny to see the drunk girls acting like complete sluts.
Gabe and I joked about how the girls around us were acting like complete whores. I started doing impressions of them being extra sluttish. That was when an icy hand was put on my shoulder and turned me around.
Rory stood in front of me. Great, I thought, just the place for a confrontation.
"What are you doing???" he asked.
"No, what are you doing?"
"Cassie, your dancing like a complete whore. And I don't think that you should. Especially with him."
"Well, Rory you need to get over it. You are not my mother. And we are not dating anymore. Just watch how single I am." I said.
I turned around and kissed Gabe. At first he was surprise but then he seemed fine. It was gross, icky, I desperately wanted to pull away but I had to prove my point. This kiss felt so wrong. I wished that it had been Rory. But I knew that we would never be able to kiss like this. Rory's hands took my shoulders and pulled me back.
"I need to talk to you privately." He said. I was secretly relieved for my lips to be away from Gabe's though.
Once we were in a secluded area he turned to me.
"What are you thinking?" he asked, I cowered in fear. I wasn't sure if I had ever seen him this mad.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean everything. With what you just did and this whole summer. And you are avoiding me. Oh and I can't forget about you begging your dad to let you stay with him. You know what he is and who he works for! What are you thinking?" he asked. It was rhetorical but I answered anyway.
"I'm thinking that by avoiding you it will help me to get over this break up. I want to move in with my dad because I love him and it'll get me away from you. And I did what I just did, so I could try to start and get my life back to before you." I said whispering the last part.
"What do you mean get over the break up, you're the one who chose this for us."
"I mean Rory that I'm still in love with you."
"Then why don't we get back together?"
"Because you don't love me and it isn't my fault that I'm in love with you. It just is."
"I do love you." He said.
"Then will you change me?" I asked hushing my voice so others wouldn't hear.
"no." he said. That was it I turned around and walked back in the direction of Gabe. "Wait" he called.
"No, our discussion is over; now please let me enjoy my birthday." I said turning to look into his gorgeous green eyes that were only rivaled by his messy dirty blonde hair.
I walked back to Gabe.
"Sorry about before." I said to him. "I just had to do something to make him jealous."
"Don't be sorry about it, in fact we can do a bit more if you want." Gabe said.
"Sorry Gabe but no, I like you too much as a friend."
"That's cool." He said.
The rest of the night went on uninterrupted. Gabe had a few too many drinks, so I decided to drive the two of us home.
I had no idea where he lived and he was having trouble remembering the directions so I opted to just go home. We pulled up to my house and crept in quietly. Through our laughs and giggles I as surprised that we didn't wake my mom.
I sat down on the couch and he sat next to me.
"You can sleep here." I whispered.
"'kay." He said taking off his shirt to go to sleep I pulled the blanket off the back of the couch for him. He sat next to me, and then pulled me down. I lay on the couch next to him. My lids felt heavy. "I wish I could sleep here." I said. I made a move to get up but he snaked his arm around me.
"Then do." He said. I was to tire to argue so I just closed my eyes and fell asleep.
I woke up with the feeling that I was being watched. I was too reluctant to open my eyes. I wanted more sleep. I could still feel Gabe's arm around me. I tried to fall back asleep but I couldn't. The feeling of being watched was different than normal. Normally it was like it was from far away, but now it felt very close. I opened my eyes and was met with my mothers disapproving stare.
Maybe now she would have a reason to send me to live with my dad.
I quietly sat up on the sofa being careful not to disturb Gabe. I really didn't need him to wake up with a hangover.
"Cassandra Sunnel, you come here this minute!" she whispered. I got up and followed my mother down the hall, my head hung. She stopped and turned to me. "Can you tell me why you were asleep with a shirtless boy on our couch?"
"Yes." I said feebly.
"And…?" she said tapping her foot on the carpet.
"Well last night we went to a party, and he got drunk, I"
"You were at a party with alcohol???" my mother asked interrupting me. I sighed and continued.
"Yes. So he was drunk and I didn't want him to be driving, so I drove. He was having trouble with the directions so I brought him back here."
"And why did you asleep with him."
"Because he wanted me to." Shit, that didn't come out right. "Mom, I didn't sleep with him, we just slept."
"And I am supposed to believe that?"
"Yes, why would I lie?" she just looked at me disapprovingly. "Don't you think what I did was better than letting him drive and getting us killed?"
"Fine." She said curtly "I just want you to know though that I do not condone this behavior and it will not happen again, understood?"
"Yes." I said feeling lightheaded by how easily I had gotten out of trouble. I turned to walk to the bathroom.
I was still wearing my clothes from last night. My pale skin contrasted with the rarely used black make-up smudged under my eyes. I turned the shower water on and slipped off my clothes. I grabbed my face wash from the counter and got in the shower. The water hadn't warmed up yet and a chill shot down my spine. I adjusted the temperature and relaxed.
I washed my face and hair then stepped out. The cold air hitting me like a fan. I wrapped a towel around me and hurried into my room. I put on a pair of NYU sweats that I had gotten from my aunt and plain white tee-shirt. I wrapped the towel around my head and walked back out of my room.
I peeked in the living room, Gabe was still sound asleep. I walked to my mom's room. She was lying in bed watching television. I walked in.
"Mom, I'm going for a walk."
"What about the boy?"
"And if he wakes up?" she asked.
"I'll leave him a note." I said.
"Cassie." My mother said warningly.
"Fine I'll wait till he wakes up."
I left her room and sat in front of Gabe. I sat…and sat…and sat.
I knew it was rude what I was about to do but I was anxious. I tapped his shoulder first and when he didn't move I pushed him a little harder. Then I full out shoved him. He woke with a start.
"What's going on?" he asked.
"Sorry to wake you, but you need to go before I get in more trouble with my mom." I lied. I had noticed how much more often I lied now.
"Oh." He said sitting up and pulling on his shirt and shoes. "Sorry Cass."
"It's okay, I had a great birthday." He got up hugged me and then left.
I walked back to the bathroom took my hair out of the towel and put in into a pony tail. I slipped on my shoes and left the house. It felt like eons since I had gone to the park. I knew why I had stayed away but now I didn't care anymore.
I almost felt like I had to go. It was like a step on the road to recovery. The park came into view. I could see the swings. The swings were my favorite thing at any park, but I couldn't sit on them.
Instead I climbed the structure and sat against one of the walls on the jungle gym.
I guess I was in a state of turmoil-a state of great confusion.
I was definitely confused. Maybe breaking up wasn't for the better. I still loved him, and he said he still loved me. But there was no point in getting back together; it would only end with him saying he wouldn't change me again. And if he wouldn't change me it was a waste of my time, illogical.
I knew that I thought about him too often, but he was the only thing that occupied my head.
I closed my eyes and tilted my head up to the sky.
"Hey." A honey smooth voice said next to me.
I didn't move. I just kept my calm.
"Must you follow me everywhere?" I asked sarcastically.
"Yes, someone has to make sure you don't do anything too stupid" he said back. I felt a rush of butterflies at the idea that we were talking to each other kindly.
"Rory, you really aren't making this easier on me." I said opening my eyes and looking at him. It was strange to see him so at ease and sitting on a play structure for four year olds.
"Maybe I'm not trying to."
"Cassie, are you really that thick?" I sneered at him, making jokes about my intelligence was not a way to get back together. "I'm not because I don't want you to forget us, I know I may seem slightly stalker-like but the thought of us never being together is unbearable."
"I guess it isn't too bad about you following and watching me everywhere, I guess if I could I would do the same."
"But I would appreciate you stopping." I said bluntly.
"It isn't helping and the world doesn't revolve around what you want. It would be stupid for us to get back together."
"Why would it be stupid?" he asked. I got to my feet and hopped off the structure.
"Figure it out, I'm the stupid one, remember." I said walking away. Today wasn't going to be a very nice day. I had already abrasively pushed one of my friends out of my house and I just insulted the boy I love.
I walked home. I finished my book. I ate food. I went to bed. I woke up the next morning showered dressed and left to my job at the bookstore. I got some new books and sold some too. The best part about the next few days though was that not once did I see Rory or get the feeling that he was watching me. I didn't get a dream or anything. But that didn't mean that I stopped thinking about him.
I arrived home at eight on Friday night.
"Hello?" I called.
"Hi honey, your dad wants you to call him." She said from the kitchen table.
"okay." I said walking eagerly to the office and picking up the phone. I knew that it was stupid to be excited. I knew that the answer would be no.
I had to dial three times before I dialed correctly.
The phone rang once.
"Hello?" my dad picked up the phone.
"Hi dad." I said "you wanted me to call?"
"Yes, well, your mother and I talked about you coming to live here. I might add that you didn't even mention it to her. And we decided that it would be a good idea."
"…" I was dumbstruck.
"Cass? You there?"
"Yes! I'm so excited!! I can't wait to have you back here. I mean you haven't lived back here in Marin forever! I've missed you so much." I said and this time it wasn't just a cover story. Too bad my jubilance completely evaporated at his next words.
"Cass, you would move here, to Italy." My dad said solemnly.