Hey everyone! First thanks for your reviews ;) you rock! Today's my 22th birthday so for the occasion I've decided to give you the last (fateful) chapter...
ps: Casara, tell the Admiral that I'd connected the dots by myself when he first mention Final Fantasy...tell him not to worry about that,it actually made me smile :)
Chapter 87: Sara
I'm in love.
It's strange really because it seems like nothing when you think about it but I'm in love. Yes, in love with Catherine Willows. I don't want to get too cliché or something but I know that I've found my soul mate. I've found the person who I can be myself with. The connection between Cath and I is a bond so strong that nothing could destroy it. And I know that there won't be anyone after her – I'll make sure of that.
I'm in love, and what's even better is that I'm loved.
I think about this year. My life has taken a 360° turn, it was a huge roller coaster and that ride was painful and draining but I don't regret it. It amazed when I think about all the things we've been through and where we are now.
I mean look at it, it all started with chaos. Cake ran away from home and then everything changed because of this event, this event was actually the catalyst of my new life. I met Nancy, I changed my relationship with Cath from coworkers, to friends and finally lovers.
It sounds simple when I say it but trust me it was everything but simple before Cath and I got together. As a matter of fact if I had made different choices I wouldn't be where I am now.
Oh but don't think that being together was a smooth ride. I learnt a long time ago that as far as Cath and I were involved there wasn't such a thing as simplicity. More than once I was close to lose her and more than once I have pushed her away for I was afraid that when she would know who I really was she'd give up on me. Then life threw pretty tough ordeals our way. I almost died twice and I almost went insane. Tough choices and sacrifices had to be made, they weren't easy but they were worth it.
I was in love once, with Travis and after him I thought that I'd never love again. And somewhere I was right I never loved again, not the way I used to love him. No, as a matter of fact I love Cath in a better, deeper, stronger way than I ever loved Travis.
From the chaos of this year of ordeals came out creation. Yeah from all this came out the love of my life, Catherine, then a family, and a home. I'd spent a lifetime running, pushing people away, kicking and screaming if need be not to trust anyone but myself. But this year I've learnt to let it all go and go with the flow even if sometimes it's against the odds and logic.
Life is unpredictable so there's no point to organize it, because just when you think you've figured it all out it turns upside down again. But then again that's the whole point of life, surprises and turns of event, I know I wouldn't have it any other way.
If someone gave me the power to change something, to erase something about this year, I wouldn't change anything. Yep, I wouldn't change anything at all. Because for all the pain and hurt, all the arguments and tears that have been shed, there was a beat of my heart pumping love and affection in my veins, happiness on the tip of my tongue putting a smile on my face. Everything, absolutely everything we've been through led me to where I am now. So no I wouldn't change anything for all the gold in the world.
I've found the place where I belong thanks to all those ordeals. I've found myself a home, and people to come home to and to love every day of my life. And I know that after all we've been through together, there's absolutely nothing Cath and I won't be able to face or fight. We're together for good, for the best and the worth.
I'm in love.
Love stinks sometimes, Love hurts a awful lot, Love is a killing disease, but for all the bad sides it's one of the most precious feelings and it always worth it, trust me.
"Cath?" I call her. I've been awake for a moment but since I feel comfortable with Cath clutching on my side I didn't try to move whatsoever. Her hand that is resting on my stomach seems to have a spirit on her own though because for the last five minutes it has been caressing my skin gently. I'm not complaining at all but it's a rather pleasant sensation, awakening all kind of desires in me. Since I don't get any answer from her I conclude that she's still sleeping – much to my dismay.
Her hands stops moving but it's a short lived break when the sneaky hand starts its exploration again. Only this time the caress is more insistent. Gee, somebody help! "Cath?" I call her again this time my voice squeaks a little.
"Hmm?" she breathes innocently.
"So you're awake." I state in a mock scolding tone. She just kisses my neck in response. She shifts her position so she has more room to kiss my neck as her hand starts to head up toward my breast. I have to found out how to breathe and soon.
"You don't like my touch babe?" She asks teasingly and I can feel her smiling against my skin. She knows exactly what she's doing to me.
"I just… I just… don't want you to start something… you won't finish." I manage to say. My ability to have coherent thoughts is disappearing fast, it always does whenever she touches me. As a general rule I have between two and three minutes before my brain goes dying in a gutter.
"Alright." She says as she stops kissing my neck. To my surprise though, she lifts my shirt higher and takes on of my nipples in her mouth without warning. Holy…
"Cath… Cake is… near." I try to reason her in a last heroic attempt. Yes heroic, because you can't possibly imagine the amount of resistance and strength it takes me make such an eloquent statement when she's touching me like she does right now.
"That's right, so you have to be quiet." She says with a devilish smile before getting her attention back on my breast.
"I…" I try once more but my two minutes limit has expired hence my brain being actually unavailable. Resistance is vain. I give in, and focus on her skillful mouth, biting my lips hard not to let any moan, whimper or treacherous sound escaping the prison of my mouth. The very last thing I want is for babycake to barge into our room because she hears someone screaming.
We have a rule, whenever Cake is around we stick up with heavy making out session, since we can be quite…vocal while making love. At least we used to because it seems that Cath is in mood for breaking rules today.
I grab Cath face and kiss her deeply and passionately. She straddles my stomach to get on top of me and gets me out of my shirt. Instinctively my hands get on her hips. It's not long before I get them under her shirt needed to feel her skin on mine. But she grabs my hands and stops their progression. She gets them out from under her shirt "Sorry babe, but we'll do this my way." She purrs in my ears before attacking my neck hungrily.
She pins my hands on each sides of my face, silently ordering me to let them here. When she senses that I'll comply to her request, she trails her hands down my arms gently leaving goose bumps on her way.
We both have a strong personality, and if there's one thing we have in common it's the fact that we always want to have things under control. When in our lovemaking it shows, we tease each other relentlessly until one of us gets the upper hand. Sometimes though – like right now, one of us takes the lead and the other follows. Today she has something in mind and she won't let me sidetrack her. I want to oblige but it's hard to let go my grip when I want to touch her and feel her so badly "Relax babe, just enjoy the ride." She tells me looking at me straight in the eyes. Her eyes are begging me to trust her and to let go, that she loves me and that everything is fine.
When she's sure that I'll follow her through she lowers her mouth on my stomach again. I close my eyes tightly, breathe, I need to breathe. She teases me, slowly driving me insane. Add to that the fact that I have to control myself not to make sounds I'm on the edge pretty quickly.
She lying between my legs and is removing me my shorts. She starts to kiss my legs on all their length, biting and nibbling here and there, always getting nearer from where I want her to be but then backing away letting me wait in frustration. I'm literally writhing in agony gripping the sheet with a death hold. I can't even beg her to stop her torture because I know that my voice would come out as a cry. I can't help the squeak passing my trembling lips.
"Quiet babe, remember?" she says with a mischievous smile. Easy for her to say, I'm sure she knows exactly what she's putting me through. Oh she'll pay for this…
I'm split in two. In one hand I want to let go and in the other I have to control myself like a maniac not to make any sounds. The contradiction of all this makes me feel everything tenfold.
She finally decides that I've been waiting long enough. Her gifted tongue starts to make me see stars, giving me a indescribable feeling that makes my whole body shake. I start to feel a very powerful orgasm coming from the pit of my stomach, I know I won't be able to keep it prisoner of my body though. I start to shake more violently, oh god, I'm going to scream at the top of my lungs so much this feeling is burning me from inside. I can barely breathe…Oh…My… GOOGNESS!!!
In a second of clarity I grab the pillow next to me and bury my face deep into it and release the most guttural sound ever.
The pillow is taken from my face and a grinning Cath is looking at me. "You're ok?"
"Wow…" I whisper trying hard to find my breath back. There's the most idiotic smile on my face, but I don't care.
"Really?" She chuckles.
"That good uh?" She teases me. She's happy with herself and I should let her know that payback is a bitch, but I'm too busy enjoying the afterglow of one of the best orgasm of my life – if not the best.
"Wow… it was just…wow." I reply with more eloquence. She just smiles before kissing me.
"Mom, Sara, are you decent?" Cake's voice resound from behind the door.
"Give us a minute." I answer quickly, as I start to fidget to find my top and shorts. "Cath, my clothes?" she giggles in response and bends at the foot of the bed to grab my clothes she had previously disposed of only a few moment ago. I dress up quickly "Ok you can come in." Cake's head pops out of the door and then disappears again. Two seconds later she comes in with a tray in her hands putting it on Cath laps and then goes out again before coming back with another.
"I brought you breakfast." She announces. Before putting the second tray on our bed. "Since yesterday you officially live here and for your first day of you being a member of this family, I wanted to celebrate this with a special breakfast." Cake says to me.
I hug her fiercely careful not to spill food "Thank you so much, I'm touched." I say honestly before kissing her forehead. She beams in response.
"Can I have a hug as well?" Cath teases her. Cake embraces her mother lovingly before cuddling against her. We eat our first breakfast as a family, and though Cake's culinary talents aren't the best, I think it's the best breakfast I've ever had.
Once we've finish Cath gets in the bathroom to have a shower while I help Cake to take the things back in the kitchen or what's left of it. I gasp as I see the state of the place. "Babycake, your mother will pass out if she sees that mess." I chuckles.
"I know, well cooking isn't as easy as I thought. Can you distract her for a moment so I can clean this up?" she begs me with puppy eyes.
"Yeah, go make out with her or something just keep her out of here for a moment will you?"
I shake my head in response "How much time do you need?"
"A good thirty minutes if not more." She replies.
"Copy." I just say with a wink at her before heading to the bathroom. Thirty minutes are more than enough for what I have in mind.
Once I'm in the bathroom, I undress myself and get behind Cath. Attacking her neck and teasing her breast within second. "God…" she gasps leaning into me. I can feel her weakening in my arms as her body starts to respond to my touch.
"Do you know what's the punishment for naughty, naughty girl?…" I ask in between kissing of her skin she shakes her head biting her lips "Naughty, naughty payback…" I answer my own question. She whimpers as my lips hit one of her weak spot "Quiet dear, Cake is near and awake…" she bites her lips harder to smother a moan.
Ooh I'm going to have fun. Like I said: payback's a bitch.
I got back to work two days ago after almost five months of absence. Grissom was so excited he hugged me, apparently Greg had wore him out. It was good to see everyone again, and to catch up with them. It's good to be back in the game, I feel like my first days on the job when I was eager to kick some asses.
"You look happy." Nancy states. We have planned on going to the theatre with Jeremy and Cake who are at a common friend right now. "I can tell it from the stupid smile on your face. Come to think of it, Cath is sporting the same." She giggles looking at Catherine then looking at me. Oh she thinks she's funny.
"You mean the one you have when you see Warrick?" I come back. She snaps her head in my direction with surprise and a red face.
"I don't know what you're talking about." She answers quickly.
"Oh come on baby sis, you're blushing every time we say his name." Catherine says from the island.
"Warrick." I say and watch Nancy blushing a little more.
"Warrick." Cath purrs and if it's possible Nancy blushes more. Cath and I both giggle.
"Beware, you could make a tomato jealous." I state. "Warrick." I say again and Nancy buries her face in her hands.
"Stop what?" Cath asks innocently.
"Fine, we've been going out now and then for a month, happy?" Nancy confesses.
"You mean as in dates?" I tease waggling my eyebrows.
"Shut up." Nancy says before punching me lightly in the arm.
"Somebody's having a crush." Cath adds laughing.
"You're breaking my heart buttercup." I say in a mock tone of hurt with my hand on my chest. Nancy sticks her tongue at me.
"Weren't you supposed to show me something?" Nancy asks Cath changing the subject.
"Right. Come on it's in the spare room." And with that the both of them disappear in the corridor.
A minute later someone knock on the door. I go opening it, finding Warrick on the other side. Well speaking of the devil…
"Hey Rick. How you doing?" I say with a cheery tone.
He watches me suspiciously. Then shakes his head. "I take from the shit eating grin on your face that you know." He says not pretending anything.
"I'm not a CSI because of my pretty face." I reply.
"I should have known it was why Cath asked me to come." He chuckle nervously, I just smirk.
"No actually it's for reminding you three things. Basically, she has Nancy's back, I have Nancy's back, and we're a terrific item as CSI so if you hurt Nancy nobody will ever know we did it or find your body for that matter, I mean it goes without saying." I state seriously counting on my hand.
"You're serious, aren't you?"
"Oh yeah." I beam.
He gulps "Copy, loud and clear."
"Good." I smile to him, patting his shoulder. "Buttercup, come on! We're going to be late!" I call. Laughing Cath and Nancy get out of the spare room. Nancy stops when she sees Warrick. And her blush strikes back.
"Rick, just in time. I'll start the coffee, we need to talk." Cath says beaming.
Nancy groans "I'm sorry." She mutters to Warrick.
Warrick chuckles "It's ok."
"Come on buttercup, we don't want to be late." I repeat before kissing Catherine goodbye.
"Ok, ok." She says then turns to Catherine "No embarrassing stories." She warns. She starts to get to the door when she gets back on her tracks and faces Warrick "I almost forgot." She says before kissing him. Though surprised he responds. Cath and I trade the same look, it's sweet.
When Nancy pulls back she's blushing but the both of them have a goofy grin. I look at Cath again and I know we're thinking the same, they got it bad. "I'll call you later." Warrick says.
And with that I head out with Nancy. I giggle until we reach the car. Once inside I look at Nancy who seems to be spacing out somewhere, I laugh. "You got it bad buttercup."
"Shut up!" She says punching my arm gently again.
Almost four years ago I had the best idea of my life. I kissed Catherine Willows. Like I said I've never thought myself as a genius, but this was the brightest idea I've ever had. I kissed Catherine Willows, igniting a fire, wild and passionate, that hasn't stopped to grow ever since. I kissed Catherine Willows, the love of my life.
It has been hell to be where I am now, to have what I have now. How could I describe my life to you? There are some arguments, some crying and crises, because life isn't about rainbows, butterflies and roses every day. But there's a lot of laughing, and tenderness. There's a lot of dances in the kitchen, there's a lot of surprises and lovemaking – fantastic lovemaking, a lot of fantasies and so much more. There's a lot of love, oh yeah a lot of love. As a matter of fact there's a little more love everyday.
Anyway, like Travis said it's a long, painful and endless work in progress. But it's a pain I wish to anyone, because in my opinion it's the best job ever. Trust me as hard as it is, I've never been so happy in my life, I have someone to love who loves me back, I have a family and there isn't any sacrifice I wouldn't do to preserve this.
Three years ago, Catherine proposed me to adopt Cake. I've never been so honored, I mean that was a great display of trust and I've swore not to betray this trust.
I've never thought I would be able to have this because of my past and all my insecurities, but Catherine proved me wrong and I'm forever grateful for this.
Cake is growing up and turning into a beautiful young lady. I'm proud of her and I'm proud to be her friend and more. I made her discover Sweig this week. We read the books together so we can talk about it. In one of them – which title escapes me right now, Sweig says 'Getting old, in the end, is nothing more than stopping being afraid of our past'. Well, I'm getting old with and thanks to Cath. And you know what? I'm happy for that.
"Honey, we're home!" Cath shouts from the entrance. I smile.
"I'm in the bedroom." I reply. I can hear Cake speaking a mile a minute all excited and then ask to make a phone call. A rather exhausted Catherine enters the bedroom and flops down next to me.
"She wore me out." She says with an exaggerated sigh. I chuckle in response.
"Come here, I'll give you a hug."
Catherine complies, kicking out her shoes and getting to my level on the bed. She gets into my arms "Can I have a kiss too?" She pouts.
"Sure you can." I answer before leaning in to kiss her. My hands get into her hair and her sneaky left hand gets under my top caressing my stomach. I can't help the giggle coming out of my lips. Cath pulls back with a questioning look. "Your ring is cold babe, it tickles me." I explain and she shakes her head. She gives me a quick kiss and leans her head on my shoulder, not removing her hand from under my top.
We share a content silence, happy to be together after hours of separation. "So did you find it?" I ask.
"Yes we did."
"How is it?"
"It's gorgeous and she looks like a princess into it. But you'll see for yourself tonight because she wants you to see it as well." She says kissing my neck.
"Let's hope Eric will like it." I say.
"He better like it because I ruined myself for this dress."
"It's her prom dress Cath."
"I know. You should have seen the look on her face when she saw it. I knew right then it was the one. I'm broke but I'm happy."
I kiss her crown. "Don't forget Warrick and Nancy are coming for dinner tonight." I remind her gently.
"Right, I have to find something to fix for dinner."
"I already did, I told you I'd take care of it. So all you have to do is resting a little until tonight." I tell her.
"Have I told you that I loved you lately?"
"I believe you did this morning. But that was a lifetime ago." I tease her.
She lifts her head up and look at me intently "I love you."
"I love you too." I say before kissing her again. This time she's the one giggling in our kiss, but I join her putting my hand over the one she has under my top.
"And I love the both of you as well." She says before kissing my belly where one of the twins has kicked.
There's one last amazing thing I haven't mentioned yet. Callum and his twin brother Colin are on their way to join our little family. I'm all excited about this and so are Cath and babycake.
Who would have thought I'd be here four years ago? Honestly? Not me. I guess the world truly is full of wonders.
My life is simply perfect, with all its little imperfections, it's truly perfect…
That's it people. This story is officially finished ! I guess I'm into happy ending after all… ;) The quote from Sweig is taken from '24 hours in a woman's life'.
I'd like to thank all the readers and all the reviewers who took time to take interest on this story. I don't think there are words enough to express my gratitude to you, you are truly wonderful, you're the best readers and reviewers one can dream to have for their first story, really I've been blessed. I know that you gave me motivation more than once with your ever so kind, sweet and fun words so thank you everyone. I really enjoyed sharing this story with you, it was a great experience and really important to me. I hope you've enjoyed this ride just as much as I did.
I'd like to thank those who took time to review : justicegrl, clarkson04, LadyBelle84, Uriel Falcon, starbuck 1985, csi7, BLah, Polarice, Thompson the Nemesis, neo-chef, Gryffindor620, Jenny70529, dolphin18paradise, chicks, CraZy-xClowN, CSISVUTWFBgurl, Maximilliam, omfg, Alison, miyuve, jiannaj, omfg skittles, One Who Reads Good Stories, gravitygirl183, nomoviescriptending, jbadia, The Water Fountain, icklebitodd, Alex mort, Admiral Andalite, goldentail, Angie, AnMaDeRoNi, AverageJoe, loveshouse, Doyle, Aemie, Seldomnaughty, Purejoy.Chik, flazeron, qt4good, …, aj, Axiegirl21, disharmony, Intergalactic smart-ass, laura1888, Kess, willowpowered, saya, KSUnsungHero, chawkchic,countrygurl261980
I tried not to forget anyone but if I did please forgive me it wasn't intentional !
Immi thanks for exposing me your point of view and letting me know when I was cruel, for being patient and sweet ;)
JoJo : I loved having your insight about things, thank you very much ;)
Chione : thanks for taking time to review even if you have an erratic job, and thanks for the medical tips ;) (hope your pregnancy is getting on fine and wish you luck and happiness with that :) )
El Gringo Loco thank you for the tips when it came to the language, it was good to have a little help ;)
Sara Lya thanks for reading my story when you should have been working on your exams ( I hope you did good by the way) ;)
ACertainJusitice : 'Muchas gracias' for sticking up with me from chapter one, for practicing some foreign language with me and always being kind with your words ;)
Chimp1984 : thanks for having the courage to read this story at work and accepting the fact now that your coworkers think that you're probably emotionally unstable and to let your family think that you were crazy ;)
FloatingInMoon thanks for letting me know that I could touch people with my poor and simple words ;)
Madalyn : I'm sorry for making you lose your sleep over this, thanks for all your sacrifice ;)
Jackie : thanks 'ab imo pectore' for making me feel special ;)
ana thanks for your french words they made me feel a little less alone ;)
Casara : thanks for threatening me with your Buster Sword when I was about to slack off or playing too much with you ;)
Calixthe : thanks for all your precious advices they really meant a lot to me, and they've been put at contribution ;)
Z : it was nice to have your opinion on the dynamic I had settled and know that your propositions are still on my mind for future references, thank you ;)
bene : you are my first reviewer ever and for that you have a very special place in my heart, thank you for being addicted to my story ;)
And last but certainly not least – I want you to know that, scubysnak : thanks for all the teasing, the advices, the blackmail (I must be the only person to say thanks for such a thing !) for making me laugh, pushing me and kicking my ass when need be, thanks for your 'subtle' hints and all ;)
I'm sorry I don't have a personal word for everyone, but know that I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your support and kind words. All your opinion mattered to me and really guide me through my writing. I thank you for sticking up with me and this fic even though I was cruel or evil sometimes, or when I made you cry (I'm sorry about that), I'll never do you justice with words, my gratitude truly is deep and endless. I love you all guys !
This was my first story but I can say that it won't be the last. So it's not really the end, just the beginning :)
Je vous remercie tous du fond du cœur, je vous aime ! ;)
Thanks for reading, and see you guys soon. ;)