Rated PG-13 for yaoi, implied sexual situations, and some language
Disclaimer: I'd have made all of Organization XIII live, win, and pair up if I owned Kingdom Hearts. That definitely didn't happen, so I obviously don't own it.
Author's note: This is a Christmas present for my friend lightbulby at LJ. She wanted Demyx with a puppy, and I ran with that and through in Xigbar too. He reflects my opinion of puppies… I won't lie; I'm a cat person. But yeah. Merry Christmas dear; hope you like it! Now, notes… I know in 101 Dalmatians that two are the parents and only ninety-nine are puppies, but oh well! Let's pretend they took in some stray puppies or something. Just go with it if you please. Oh, and I threw in my theory on Demyx's origins too, so just play along there too. Other than that… Enjoy a puppy overdose!
Flames do nothing but make me laugh, although I'll listen to any CC you have. Please read, review, and enjoy! Finished 12-06-06
"Why are we here again?" Demyx questioned, still not quite believing that the mission the Superior had just assigned them was real.
"Puppies. We need to find one-hundred and one puppies." Okay, so Demyx hadn't been imagining things. That was good at least.
"That's what I thought… But why do we need to find so many puppies?" Xigbar bit back a sigh, wondering if this was going to turn into another game of twenty questions. It was a good thing Demyx was cute…
"Did you even listen to the debriefing?" The sheepish look on the Nocturne's face told him that no, no he hadn't. Figured. "Why else?" Something about the key to Kingdom Hearts, just like it always is." Demyx nodded, not surprised in the least. It wasn't like Xemnas would have wanted to fill the boring old castle with one hundred and one bundles of fluffy love… Though IX certainly wouldn't have complained had that been the case.
"Oh, okay. Then we can find all the puppies in this house?" It was big and old looking, most likely with plenty of hiding spaces… Demyx was actually rather excited about this mission. It was more like a game—with puppies. And Xigbar. Oh yes, his day was looking up already!
"Yeah, so let's hurry up and go get this over with." And with that, Xigbar was suddenly gone in a flurry of black. Demyx smiled to himself and quickly followed the old-fashioned way.
Xigbar hated this mission.
No one to pester, no one to shoot, and those puppies—those damn puppies! He hadn't caught a single one, despite the fact that he could break the laws of gravity. Each puppy had still somehow managed to elude his grasp. And it certainly didn't help that each time he ran into Demyx, the younger Nobody always had an armful of black and white fur, plus a few more fuzzballs yipping happily at his heels.
Yeah, definitely a good thing he's cute.
"Yip yip!" And there, right there, one of those annoying excuses for a dog! A little Dalmatian puppy with a red collar and a large black patch over its right eye was in sight. And Xigbar would be damned if he let the little bugger get away…
"You're mine little man…" But before he could move, the puppy was off, running down the hall and barking, no, mocking Xigbar and his lack of demonic puppy catching skills. Well, he'd show that pest a thing or two! Summoning his gun to his hand, he teleported to the ceiling and sprinted off after it.
"Ninety-seven, ninety-eight, ninety-nine… Just two more left!"
Demyx was in heaven. Catching these puppies had been the most fun he'd had since he became a Nobody. They were all just so cute and friendly! After he'd had about thirty puppies trailing after him, he'd finally made them wait in the ballroom while he continued searching so he wouldn't lose them again. But now he had to find the last two…
He vaguely wondered if Xigbar had them but quickly dismissed the idea. Every time they'd met up, II hadn't had a single puppy with him. Demyx had figured that the sharpshooter wanted to see if he could handle it himself… Obviously, catching puppies was just way too easy for the older Nobody.
"Yip yip!" Demyx hadn't even taken three steps out of the room before two pudgy puppies rounded the corner and ran up to him. He smiled and bent down, allowing them to jump into his open arms.
"Hey there! Wanna go meet up with your friends? Yeah, that'll be fun, won't it?" He brought them back to the others, wondering when Xigbar would show up…
Forty-five minutes after Demyx had rounded up all one hundred and one Dalmatians, Xigbar stalked into the room, and angry wriggly puppy in his grasp.
"There. A puppy. Happy?" Demyx blinked at his partner's clipped tone, wondering why II was so mad. And why did he have a puppy when they were all there already? Had one snuck out when he wasn't looking…?
"I thought you were making me get them myself—" He was cut off as Xigbar yelled rather unbecomingly, clutching his hand where the puppy had bitten him. It ran over to Demyx and leapt into his arms, growling in Xigbar's general direction. Well, at least now Demyx was distracted…
"Okay, we have 'em all, so let's go." Demyx shook his head, looking at all of the puppies in a confused manner.
"But I already found one hundred and one… I've gotta recount them." …With as long as Xigbar had been chasing the demonic beast, it was highly unlikely that this was an escapee. And he really wanted to leave.
"No, Xemnas was wrong. There's an extra puppy. Let's just get them to the castle." Demyx, still unsure of the situation but not wanting to argue, nodded slowly. And playing with the puppies had been so fun…
"Okay… But do we have to go right now? Can't we stay for just a little bit longer?" Being mostly immune to Demyx's "look at me, I'm cute, so do what I want before I pout!" face, Xigbar opened his mouth to remind him that this was a mission, not a play date, when a hissing sound caught his attention. He looked down to find one of the many puppies using his boot as a fire hydrant.
"We. Are. Leaving. Now."
It had taken a while, but they managed to get all one hundred and two puppies out of the house and into the castle. Of course, once Xigbar had finally stopped helping and just let Demyx work, things went much faster. Luckily for the sharpshooter, IX still hadn't caught on. And now there were many, many puppies running around in Demyx's room—they hadn't been told what to do with them once caught and there was no way in hell Xigbar was keeping them in his room—until they found out what Xemnas wanted to do with them.
"Take them back." Xigbar felt a strong urge to shoot Xemnas. Shoot him dead, and then shoot him again once more just to make sure.
"What do you mean, 'take them back'? We just got 'em here!" Xemnas, not having even the slightest idea as to how hellish Xigbar's day had been, paid little mind to the pure frustration he was met with.
"You heard me II. If the rumors about the young canines' connection to Kingdom Hearts had been correct, you would have seen an immediate response as soon as they were all together. And I do not want those things running around the castle, so take them back." Xigbar's glare was still very intimidating, despite only having one eye with which to do so. Xemnas, however, was no longer paying the duo any attention, so Xigbar disappeared without saying a word. But as soon as Demyx followed and reappeared by his superior's side…
"—kill that bastard!" …Xigbar was in the midst of death threats. "He could have told us that before we brought all those damn puppies here!" Demyx was upset too, but for very different reasons. He'd been hoping the puppies would be sticking around for at least a little while…
"I guess we should get them back to their home…" For the first time that day, Xigbar wholly agreed with him.
Getting them back went much smoother, solely because Xigbar didn't even try to help this time, instead letting Demyx have some "bonding time" before he had to say goodbye. Something that Xigbar couldn't wait to do.
"Okay, that's all of them…" Oh, it was a good thing they didn't have hearts, because if they did, the look on the blond's face probably would have broken his. Now, he knew all too well that Demyx was a strange guy, but there was one thing that had been bothering the sharpshooter all day…
"Hey kid, why the hell do you like those damn things so much? You came from Atlantica! You didn't even know what a dog was before you lost your heart!" Demyx's ever-present smile faltered as he looked out over the puppies running around, glad to be back home. The sad look that settled on his face did absolutely nothing to ease II's confusion.
"Well… One day I was out swimming near the surface, and I saw something sinking. I wasn't sure what it was back then, but I did know that it was nothing like anything we had in the sea, so it had to be from a human, probably dropped of the side of a ship. Turns out, it was a plastic picture book for a kid to learn their ABCs. There was the letter, a word, and a picture. We weren't supposed to have human things, but I kept it anyways, 'cause oh man, it was just amazing! There were so many things in the book I'd never seen before… Apples, bees, cats, dogs…
"I loved the water, don't get me wrong, but I wanted to live on land and see those things so bad! Especially a dog. They looked so fun and friendly, even in that little book. I was used to scaly and slimy things, you know? I'd never seen any furry creatures before… So when I lost my heart and became a Nobody, a human Nobody, I was so excited to see all of the things I'd dreamed about! And when I found out we were gonna see all those puppies today… I guess I'm just being stupid again, huh? Sorry…"
…Now Xigbar felt like a royal ass for letting his annoyance with the puppies affect how he was treating Demyx. It wasn't his fault the puppies liked him and not Xigbar. Of course not seeing them for so many years would make him excited! Radiant Garden had been swarming with dogs just waiting to steal your food when you weren't looking, but Atlantica obviously was a different story...
Dammit. The kid had managed to his tug on his non-existent heartstrings yet again.
"Look kid… I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but why don't we take one of those fuzzballs back with us?" Saying that Demyx's face lit up at those words would have been a vast understatement. Oh no, he looked absolutely ecstatic.
"Really? You mean it? We can really keep one?!" Without waiting for confirmation—at this point, it really would have matter if II had been joking anyways—he ran over to the playful puppies and started looking them over. Meanwhile, Xigbar stayed back and wondered what the hell he'd just done. He knew this was a bad idea. A very bad idea. Eventually someone would find out about it, and he'd have to fight tooth, nail, and gun to let the kid keep his puppy. But one way or another, no matter what headaches it would bring, Demyx would get his puppy… "I want this one!"
"…You've gotta be kidding me." The growling ball of fur that was shoved in his face was none other than the extra demonic puppy that Xigbar had spent almost an hour trying to catch. "Why do you want that one?" Demyx smiled cheerfully and held the puppy close. Of course, the growling stopped immediately.
"Well, it's the one you caught—" Xigbar had to stop himself from shouting, 'Don't remind me!' "—and besides, just look at him! He looks like you!" Coming from anyone else, he would have taken that as an insult. But this was Demyx after all, so he didn't give it any mind. Regardless, he failed to see the resemblance.
"What gave you that idea?" The musician's fingers traced the black patch around the puppy's eye, smiling fondly. Ah, that explained it. His eye patch. "…Why would you want one that reminds you of me? Don't you get enough of me at the castle?"
"No," Demyx admitted with a shake of his head. "I like the way you look. I wouldn't stick around to look at your face every morning if I didn't." It was Xigbar's turn to shake his head. And shake he did.
"Brat…" Demyx laughed, knowing that he wasn't upset. And even if he was, he never stayed that way for long. Demyx knew how to use his cuteness to its full advantage.
"Aw, come on," he laughed, setting the puppy down and wrapping his arms around Xigbar's neck, drawing their bodies closer, "you know you love me." …Xemnas be damned, he was right, and they both knew it. Damn.
"Yeah, as if… Just shut and kiss me. And that's an order IX." Demyx's eyes all but sparkled as strong arms encircled his waist.
"Yes sir, II…" Lips met with an air of familiarity, brought on by the fact that they'd been doing this, and much, much more, almost since Demyx had been inducted into Organization XIII. However, a certain someone watching was less than impressed by this display of affection…
"Demyx," Xigbar growled, pulling away slightly and giving his lover a less than impressed look, "your mutt is biting my coat."
"He likes you!" the blond exclaimed, breaking the embrace and picking up his new puppy. Somehow, Xigbar seriously doubted that was the case. "He needs a name though… How about Xiggy?"
There was pure silence for a good half a minute—even all of the other puppies seemed to have gone perfectly still.
"There's no way in hell you're calling that thing—"
"Xiggy, I swear to every deity ever imagined, if you eat one more of my boots, I'm gonna shoot you!"
Three months. Three months with that beast, who wasn't quite so small anymore, and Xigbar was honestly wondering why he'd ever agreed to this in the first place…
"Come on Xigbar, be nice!" …Oh yeah, Demyx was too fucking cute for his own good.
"He ate my boots. Again. You should tell him to be nice."
In three months, it would seem obvious that someone would find out about Xiggy, especially since Xigbar found a reason—often a very good reason—to yell at him everyday. That was precisely what happened. In fact, it had only taken a mere three days before he snuck out of Demyx's room and ransacked the kitchen, much to Zexion's annoyance. Then he dug up Marluxia's garden—the assassin would have had another victim if Demyx hadn't rushed out and stopped him. And of course, as he knew he'd have to, Xigbar had to step in to stop Demyx from being killed. But luckily for the musician and his troublemaking puppy, Marluxia and Zexion had been bribed into secrecy—Xigbar didn't want to know what they planned to do with all that munny—and for now things were going fairly smoothly… Except for Xigbar's wardrobe of course.
"Aw, he didn't mean it, did you Xiggy? No, no you didn't! Xigbar's just being grumpy again isn't he? He just needs to get laid!" The combination of those words being said to a dog and in baby talk was disturbing indeed. …And he had just gotten laid. Last night in fact, thus why his boots were in Demyx's room. But jeez, he really wished they could put that stupid mutt somewhere else… He watched them; Xigbar just knew it. And it was damn creepy.
"Demyx… You better be glad I love ya as much as a guy without a heart can, cause if I didn't, I'd have let Zexion make him into puppy burgers like he wanted." Demyx rolled his eyes at the empty threat as he styled his hair and managed to get some nice glances of Xigbar dressing in the mirror. He figured that VI had gotten his vicious streak from Marluxia. Sleeping with a guy for so long seemed to do that… He'd certainly gotten over his fear of heights pretty quickly after the first time Xigbar mentioned those two miraculous words—"ceiling sex."
"Oh, you're no fun…" He finished the final touches on his hair and nodded to his reflection, happily picking up Xiggy and cuddling him afterwards. "Look, if you promise not to shoot my poor little Xiggy, I'll find an obedience school or something, okay? Twilight Town probably has one. They have everything…" Well, it was something at least. And as long as he didn't have to explain to Xemnas why he needed another new pair of boots, he'd take it.
"Deal. Now leave your damn little demon alone and finish getting dressed. We have a mission today, remember?" There was that blank look again, telling Xigbar that no, no he hadn't. "Whatever… Come on; let's just get this over with…"
Demyx came back with a kitten that night, but that's a story for another day.