The Fight of the Great Professors
After the whole incident with the boys and girls both changing in to the opposite sex, things pretty much went back to normal, well pretty much.
Lily had not forgiven James for making her kiss him, and secretly had not forgiven herself for liking it. James chased after Lily with even more resolve knowing that she didn't hate him.
Sirius and Samantha were acting nuts. One minute they were threatening each other and the next they were in a closet snogging. They both swore that they didn't like each other but their groups were not so certain.
Remus would not look Arabella in the eye after their passionate kiss and then the trick his friends had insisted on pulling to get the girls back. Arabella fled every time she saw Remus, which only made him more afraid to speak with her. And Peter was in the middle of all of it.
"Can we all please just stop the madness?!!" Peter yelled when all of them were finally in the common room sitting around and acting as they had been.
They all looked up at him quizzically. He continued bravely,
"Lily and James I can deal with, they do this all of the time. But Sirius and Samantha, just date already we all know you like each other," Lily and James looked smug, Sirius and Samantha were about to butt in but Peter cut them of, "Don't even try to deny it. Remus just tell Arabella that you fancy her and get together already. You are all driving me nuts!"
Sirius and Samantha folded their arms as if to say that Peter was not right, about them at least. Remus and Arabella blushed and then Remus threw Peter a dirty look that was not like him at all. James and Lily just sat there smiling as if to say at least it's not us.
Peter threw up his hands in defeat and then stomped out of the door angrily. Sirius watched him leave with a confused face on he frowned,
"Well what's wrong with him?" he asked and the rest of the group just shrugged not wanting to admit that Peter was right.
"PMS." Samantha answered and then remembering that they had been girls once laughed. The rest of the group laughed too.
Remus feeling rather uncomfortable left the room mumbling about needing to go to the library. Arabella stood up alarmingly quickly and shouted, "I'm gonna study up stairs." Then she too had left.
Sirius scowled, "What's with all this studying stuff? Those two have serious problems."
Samantha growled and tapped him on the head with her quill, "Maybe your friend has serious problems but mine does not. So take it back before I make you!"
"Yeah right! And how exactly are you going to make me little miss perfect?" Sirius asked folding his arms across his chest.
"Like this!" she said and promptly pinched his side making him jump.
Sirius looked at her and then angrily yelled, "You're going to pay for that!" while Samantha sprinted across the room. Sirius started to gain on her but then she stepped foot on the girls stairs. She smirked as he put his foot down and immediately slid. Unfortunately for her it was short lived as she two slid down the stairs, which she had not anticipated.
She landed on Sirius with a thud and then scowled trying to get away from him as fast as possible. Sirius promptly grabbed her ankle causing her to fall down for the second time in less than a minute.
"Do you mind?" she huffed.
"Not at all." He said then turned her over so that she was lying on her back. Her hair wildly falling in heaps under her.
Sirius grabbed her wrists and held on to them as she tried to escape. She struggled under his grip and pouted.
"Leave me alone!" she said in a playful manner. Sirius just chuckled.
"You are now my prisoner! What shall I do to you?" he asked looking very mischievous.
Samantha's eyes widened in horror knowing that she was at his psychotic, and twisted, mercy. She pleaded,
"Now Sirius just remember…" but she stopped as he pressed his finger to her lips trying to think.
"You won't get away with it. Lily's here, s-she'll s-s-save me." Samantha said trying to point at James and Lily who were watching amused.
"Oh really?" Sirius said flashing Samantha an evil yet funny look and sat on her releasing his hands from her wrists, "Prongs if you would." Then he made a series of odd hand movements that only James seemed to comprehend.
James grinned and turned to Lily who seemed not to like where this was going. Then James swooped her up and ran out of the common room holding Lily securely in his arms. Lily was flailing her arms and yelling, "James, Put me down this instant!" Samantha heard James yell faintly, "What will you give me if I do?" Lily screamed then Samantha couldn't hear them any longer.
Sirius switched positions and took out his wand. He muttered a spell so low that Samantha couldn't make out the words. Then he got up, so as Samantha thought she was set free, she tried to get up. She groaned, it couldn't be that easy, this was Sirius we are talking about.
Sirius laughed at her realization.
"So who will save you now?" he asked as she scanned the room for allies. No one was there. They were alone.
"Damn!" Samantha screeched.
Sirius laughed. Then he sat on the ground next to her and just played with her hair. Samantha looked up at him suspiciously. Was this some kind of trick? Sirius Black had a girl pinned to the floor and all he was doing was playing with her hair.
"Is this a trick?" she asked as Sirius smiled down at the girl lying on the floor. He touched her cheek with his lips and Samantha shivered. It wasn't passionate or rough like Sirius's normal kisses and he refrained from kissing her lips, which was rather sweet in Samantha's opinion.
"No, I'm not trying to trick you right now, Marauders Honor." He said beaming at Samantha.
Samantha blushed and was horribly embarrassed. She never blushed or felt like this ever. She felt shy. But that wasn't normal either, it's not like she had never been kissed before. She had in fact kissed Sirius himself a number of times just to tease him. But she did notice, much to her displeasure, that his kisses were the best. No other guy had came close to him, in anything, well except grades but they weren't everything were they.
"Then what pray tell are you doing Sirius?" she asked when she had finally found her voice.
"Just admiring the view." He let out speaking more calmly than he felt.
Sirius wanted nothing more than to envelop her in a series of kisses but he did not want to ruin the moment or take advantage of the situation. So he simply smiled down at her foolishly then he rested his head on her stomach and stared at the ceiling. He started to daydream about a certain black haired girl when he was distracted by a honey sweet voice,
"Sirius my dear," Samantha began. Sirius sat up to face her. Then he nodded for her to continue, "If you wouldn't mind (yelling) I WOULD LIKE TO GET UP!"
Sirius chuckled and waved his wand at her so that she could move.
"Thank you!" she said sarcastically.
Sirius had stood up and was backing up in case she should decide to do something drastic. Samantha followed him up to one of the couches. She pushed him on to it, and then grabbed him by the scruff of the neck. Thinking she was going to punch him Sirius closed his eyes for the blow. But it never came. Instead she leaned down and kissed him passionately on the lips. He opened one eye to see if it was a trick. She let go of him and ran up the girls' staircase. Then when she was safely on the top she yelled, "Ha! Can't get me now, Sirius." He heard a door shut but didn't care. He closed his eyes keeping the memory of her kisses on his mind and drifting in to a sleep.
Meanwhile, James was carrying Lily throughout the whole school. Sirius had said he wanted to be alone with Samantha and had asked him to take Lily somewhere but James didn't know where exactly he was supposed to take her. So he contented himself with running around the school holding her to him. He quite enjoyed this fact and that the students had started to whisper frantically about the two of them being a couple. Lily however was not amused.
Although, she had to admit that she found the prospect funny and had been pleasantly surprised by his muscular physic. She quickly brushed those thoughts away as James bounded down a particularly bumpy staircase.
"James Potter if you don't put me down right this instance I'll…I'll…" Lily started.
"You'll what?" he quipped with one eyebrow cocked up.
"I'll do this. PROFESSOR DUMBLEDORE, PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL PLEASE COME QUICK I AM BEING HELD CAPTIVE BY A SEVERLY IRRITATING BOY AND NEED YOUR HELP IMENSELY!" Lily screamed in to the air. With a swish, Professor McGonagall was next to them. She looked at James with disapproval and was about to lecture him sternly when she heard another click on the side of her. Dumbledore looked at the two of them highly amused before turning to McGonagall and asking,
"What is it now?"
McGonagall looked about as angry as Lily did herself, causing Lily to smile evilly at James, who looked at Professor McGonagall nervously. She was after all just about the only teacher, besides Dumbledore of course, that he did not mess with.
"Your favorite student here has once again been bothering mine." Professor McGonagall said angrily to Dumbledore as if it was somehow his fault.
"Oh come on Minerva, Lily looks perfectly fine to me. The boy was only teasing." He said as if he was in fact the one who had done it.
"Well I never!" Professor McGonagall let out and Dumbledore stepped back nervously. Lily and James stepped back and gasped. Dumbledore was never scared, not of anyone, yet now under Professor McGonagall's gaze he stood back.
"Minerva please just let it go for right now." Dumbledore pleaded sweetly with only a hit of nervousness. It seemed to Lily that there was a double meaning to this conversation the Professors were having.
"I'm sorry Albus but I will not turn my back on one of my star students in need so that your favorite can get away scot free." She wheeled around to face James, "Potter put her down this instant or you will live your life as a cockroach." She threatened and James immediately put her down and rushed to stand behind Dumbledore. Lily smiled and walked over to Professor McGonagall's side.
"Thank you Professor." Lily said quite pleased that she was one of McGonagall's favorite students, yet a little unhappy knowing that James was Professor Dumbledore's. She noted that next time she yelled for help she would not mention Dumbledore.
Professor McGonagall turned to her, and let out a short motherly smile, before turning around to face Dumbledore and James again. She pointed her wand at Professor Dumbledore quite menacingly. James took out his own wand and pointed it in the girls' direction. Lily pulled hers out daring James to even think about hitting a teacher. Dumbledore took his own out, more for protection than anything.
The corridor had become quite crowded with some rather loud students yelling, "Fight! The Professors are fighting!"
"Now Minerva you are very emotional right now. Don't do anything that you might regret." Dumbledore said warily.
"Emotional am I? I am not some 16 year old girl Albus I know full well what I am doing!" she yelled glaring at him icily.
Lily looked up at her Professor and was sorry that she had called them. She did not want her favorite professor to get fired or seem out of control. But she also did not want to betray her by apologizing and saying it had not been a big deal. So Lily just stood there ready to back McGonagall up if need be.
"Professor I'm sorry." James let out weakly not wanting things to get even more out of proportion than they already were.
But McGonagall's eyes blazed. She looked in to Dumbledore's eyes and the stood up so regally that Lily stared in awe.
"You two are so alike," She hissed, "Not caring about your actions and how they affect other people." She looked from Albus to James and back.
Lily held her breath. The crowded room was silent. The tension was so thick you could have cut it with a knife.
"Minerva…" Dumbledore started but was interrupted by Professor McGonagall who put her wand away.
"No, I don't want to talk to you right now Albus. You're not worth my time." She said as elegant as if she had just asked him to pass the butter. Dumbledore looked hurt but McGonagall seemed not to care, she snapped her fingers and was gone, Lily was with her.
Dumbledore sighed and then walked away as well. But before James was carried off to Dumbledore's office he yelled, "What the bloody hell is going on around here?!!"
James sat in Dumbledore's office dumbfounded. What in the Wizarding World was going on? He hadn't done anything that terrible as far as he was concerned. But McGonagall looked at him as if he had preformed one of the unforgivable curses on her best friend. To say the least he was thoroughly confused.
Dumbledore paced around his office looking sad and thoughtful, his usual twinkle was gone from his eyes. He looked up at James guiltily.
James looked up at him in confusion.
"Professor you didn't do anything, I hope you don't somehow see this as your fault." James said.
"That's a nice gesture James but I'm afraid I am to blame. Look I shouldn't be telling you this because I'm breaking school rules but I feel it is your right to know since it seems it will affect you and already has I'm afraid." Dumbledore began with a sigh.
"All right Professor I'm all ears." James said listening intently.
"Before we were summoned by Lily, Professor McGonagall and I were deciding on who should be the head boy and girl next year. The head girl was rather an easy choice. Originally we had decided that Arabella and Lily were our best choices and seeing as Arabella has many other duties and extra curricular activities we chose Lily. Then we got in to a discussion about who would be head boy. That's were we had a problem. Minerva immediately said that Remus was the obvious choice but I told her he had enough to worry about with the full moon and he may not be available for his duties," at this James nodded in understanding knowing that Remus would hate to be head boy when he couldn't do his job when needed. But he still didn't understand what that had to do with him, "…so Minerva said that perhaps Armando Jardez from Ravenclaw would be sufficient and I shook my head, he doesn't have leadership abilities. She did agree there. Here I decided to tell her my choice. I said it should be you."
James looked at Dumbledore in shock. 'Me,' he thought, 'Head boy. Is he kidding?'
"Is this a joke? You can't be serious." he asked Dumbledore giving him a suspicious look.
Dumbledore chuckled but was still sad.
"That's what Minerva said. I explained to her that you are relatively the group leader and you would keep them in check and your pranks to a minimum. She told me that although you are an exceptional student you are not mature enough to handle the responsibilities of being Head boy. This is where I believe I made my mistake. I answered her saying that I'm sure if you shared duties with Lily, and spent time with her, that you would become more mature, for her. This is where Minerva looked at me with an icy stare and turned as stiff as a board. In an effort to try to keep her voice down she whispered furiously, 'I will not have you mock this school by playing matchmaker for James Potter because he is your favorite student.' I was shocked by her statement and tried to explain that she had the wrong idea. That was not my intention at all. She claimed that she didn't believe me, and that you were irresponsible, and she would only support my wish if you would grow up. She continued to accuse me of having favoritism for certain students that liked to cause trouble, as harmless as it may seem. She said that Lily earned it and had been working all of her school career to deserve it and she'd be damned if she let me hand it over to you on a silver platter. That's when we heard Lily's call. I was reluctant to go but Minerva swooped out of the room so fast that I didn't even have time to stop her, or try anyway. And that's the story." Dumbledore finished to a stunned James.
"I always thought that I was one of Professor McGonagall's favorite students, I get the best grades in her class after all. But I do get why she wouldn't have chosen me, to tell you the truth I wouldn't have chosen me if I were you either." James said half amused, half upset.
"It's not a matter of liking you Mr. Potter, truth be told Professor McGonagall respects you very much and has told me that you and your friends are brilliant sometimes. But she thinks that the head boy should be responsible, mature, and stop all matters of mischief instead of start it. I think she believes that you will go easy on your friends and let your prejudices for Slythern make it hard on them unnecessarily. I however believe that you are responsible and by next year will be head boy. I am going to try and convince McGonagall that you are indeed a wise choice. It is somewhat difficult however because she is mad at me as you have probably guessed by the little scene before. Also your little escapade today set us back slightly." Dumbledore said and James turned red with embarrassment.
"Sorry Professor. I didn't know…" he began but Dumbledore stopped him with a slight smile.
"It's perfectly alright. Now do try to be on your best behavior. You're free to leave."
James got up and started to walk towards the door. He stopped and turned around,
"Professor." He let out.
"Yes Mr. Potter." Dumbledore said sitting down in his seat.
"Thanks. You know for everything, for believing in me." He said gratefully.
"No need to thank me Mr. Potter it is your ability that has earned you the right and it will be your actions that justify them." Dumbledore said rather mystically and James hurried from the room.
"I apologize for my uncharacteristic outburst out their Ms. Evans, it was irresponsible and I hope you do not think any less of me." Professor McGonagall began pacing around her room furiously.
"Of course I don't professor! You are the most incredible woman I've ever met. You stood up to Professor Dumbledore and I must say he did deserve it. I can't imagine what he was thinking when he decided James Potter was a suitable candidate for Head boy!" Lily exclaimed as outraged as McGonagall was by the situation.
McGonagall had used a pensive in order to show Lily exactly what had happened, feeling that Lily deserved an explanation. McGonagall sat down looking rather tired and stressed by the situation.
"Now I am not talking to Albus and I am afraid the students are going to spread terrible rumors. No matter, I will still maintain my dignity and I suppose I will be taking away quite a few house points. Hopefully not too many from Gryffindor, the house cup looks rather good in my office." She let out a sigh and rubbed her forehead as if the prospect gave her a headache.
"Don't worry if anyone asks I'll tell them it was all an act." Lily suggested loyally.
Professor McGonagall smiled.
"Thanks for trying but I won't have you lie for me. You may tell Samantha and Arabella what really happened but everyone else must be left to speculate. I won't like the rumors but at least they won't be true. Only we know the truth and I suppose Dumbledore has told his favorite boy," she said favorite boy with a sarcastic flare, "so the Murderers will know too."
"Murderers?" Lily asked confused.
"Yes James and his little group of friends I here they call themselves the Murderers, why I can't fathom." Professor McGonagall said innocently.
Lily laughed and then said,
"I'm sorry professor but they actually call themselves the Marauders not the Murderers."
McGonagall turned slightly pink with embarrassment. Then she mumbled,
"May as well have been." But she didn't mean it; Lily could tell the Professor was just angry.
"If you say that it's the best way then I'll do as you ask and I'll tell James that he has to as well." Lily said sternly.
McGonagall smiled genuinely,
"Thank you Lily. I'm afraid I took enough of your time. You may leave now and on the odd apocalyptic chance you receive a detention I'll excuse you from it for staying today." McGonagall continued.
"You really don't have to. I'd talk to you any day." Lily said trying to cheer Professor McGonagall up.
"Still, my offer stands. You deserve it." McGonagall continued looking determined.
"I appreciate it Professor but are you sure there isn't anything else bothering you as well?" Lily persisted with a woman's intuition.
"You always were rather perceptive Ms. Evans but I'm afraid the other thing is highly more personal and I am not one to divulge in to it with others. I rather like dealing with most problems myself," She finished with a sigh, "I won't take up any more of your time. Goodnight Ms. Evans."
"Good night Professor and thanks for helping me today." Lily said warmly and walked away from the office at a hurried speed in order to speak with her two best friends.
When James told the Marauders what had happened they were quite taken aback. Peter looked as if he had a hard time comprehending the information, Remus looked thoughtful and very much worried, and Sirius was so shocked it had almost rendered him speechless, which was of course nothing short of a miracle. But then Sirius barked out laughing uncontrollably,
"Dumbledore wants to make you Head boy! He really is off his rocker, but this is perfect for us. Think about what we could get away with. We'll rule this place." Sirius said excitedly rubbing his hands together mischievously.
"Shh!" James tried to hush his friend and he looked around. No one was there and he was glad he had chosen their room and had put up a silencio charm around it or else everyone would have heard by now. After all Sirius could wake the dead with his mouth.
Sirius promptly quieted.
"No Sirius, you heard what Dumbledore told James, he has to earn it. We have got to be more discreet and not get caught to often. I would say we stop altogether but I'd probably be thrown out of the group, so I wont." Remus said rather frustrated.
Sirius nodded but his face fell considerably.
"Oh well, we just have to do more pranks with out James. Sorry mate but you know I can't just give it up." Sirius said looking at his friend with pity.
"We'll do nothing of the sort." Remus snapped.
Sirius frowned deeper.
"Fine I'll do it!" he said unhappily.
"What about me?" Peter added.
"I guess you could help sometimes." Sirius answered still disappointed.
"Thanks." Peter said enthusiastically.
Remus rolled his eyes at Peters hero worship.
"I still can't believe that Professor McGonagall snapped like that. It's not like her. I think there is something else wrong as well," Remus said thoughtfully, "but what could it be?"
"It doesn't matter. Whatever the case may be we have to tread softly." James said cautiously.
"I fully agree." Remus chimed in.
"Me too." Peter said just to be included in the group.
"I guess but just for you guys. I'll try but this is going to be hard to break. It's like asking me to stop breathing." Sirius put in.
"I know what you mean." James said sadly.
"We can do it though. We are great at meeting challenges." Sirius said a little more enthusiastically.
"Impossible for you." Remus retorted which started a full-blown pillow fight immediately after.
When Lily told the girls in their own room, minus their extra border, the girls had interesting reactions as well. Samantha looked absolutely livid,
"Now those guys will get away with everything!" she let out exasperated.
Arabella just shrugged and said,
"I figured as much."
Both girls looked at her like she had added a new head to her shoulder.
"You can't be serious!" said an upset Lily.
"Whose side are you on anyway?" Samantha let out tapping her foot in impatience.
"Well think about it the answer is quite logical. As much as you two don't want to admit it, those boys rule this school as it is. Think about it. Remus has all of the Ravenclaw girls at his beck and call, which he does not abuse like he could. You have Sirius who could own any Slytherin girl he wants, as much as he'd hate to admit it. The Hufflepuff girls practically immortalize James, and Gryffindor girls are a mix of the three with the exception of us. Dumbledore knows this. The Gryffindor and Hufflepuff boys think that James is the worlds answer to Quidditch, Ravenclaws respect Remus's wit and brain power more than their best student, and Slytherins respect Sirius's ancestry to much to completely disobey him, except maybe Malfoy and Snape. James is the unofficial leader of the group therefore he is the logical choice." Arabella finished.
"You know she's right." Samantha admitted.
"I hate it when that happens." Lily growled upset that she couldn't deny what Arabella had said, she had to admit that she was right.
"As for you being picked that was also a stroke of genius on his part. You own James, James owns most of the school. It's rather perfect." Arabella added thoughtfully.
"I don't own James." She said indignantly.
"Yes you do as well as part of the Gryffindor boys and all of the Hufflepuff boys, even a few Ravenclaws. Samantha owns all of Slythern, a few Hufflepuffs and a part of Gryffindor, mostly Sirius. Then as much as I hate to sound vain, I own most of the Ravenclaws and a few Griffindors." Arabella continued.
Samantha smiled full of mischief.
"You forgot to mention someone my dear, dear Arabella." Samantha said.
Arabella looked up at her quizzically. She started to count on her fingers.
"No I didn't." she began but stopped; she knew where this was going.
"What about our dear Remus?" Samantha said looking rather evil.
"He doesn't like me. That kiss was just a spur of the moment thing, don't you think if he liked me that much we wouldn't have been turned us in to boys days after?" Arabella protested impatiently.
"That was the equivalent of putting gum in your hair. He is a boy, intelligent or not they act weird when it comes to girls." Lily said quite sagely.
"I doubt it." Arabella said with a sigh.
"Enough of this guy talk. We have better things to do with our time, like play Quidditch!" Samantha said rather optimistically.
Arabella raised one brow and then shook her head.
"As tempting as that sounds I think I'll read a book instead."
"I would like to study as well." Lily admitted taking out her Transfiguration book, determined to do twice as well for her Professor.
"You guys are such Party animals," Samantha said sarcastically. She rolled her eyes and plopped down on the bed, "I blame you two for my good grades and crumbling social status."
The other two girls laughed and Arabella said,
Then they all studied Transfiguration together much to Samantha's displeasure.
The following day James was desperately trying to be good. He had woken up early to make sure he looked presentable enough for his purposes. His robes were impeccable and he had even tried desperately to slick back his hair, but to no avail. He looked at himself in the mirror noting that he looked like a mothers dream of the perfect boy.
Remus being the light sleeper that he was had woken up when James had and looked angry about it, but pleased with James efforts. He shook Peter awake so he wasn't the only one woken up but was not in the mood to even attempt to wake up Sirius alone.
James turned to Remus with an unsure sort of nervous smile.
"Well what do you think? Will it work?"
"There's only one way to find out." Remus answered and James nodded.
The two of them made a running jump on to Sirius who only shifted in his sleep.
"Unbelievable!" Remus huffed and took out his wand as they both got off of their friend.
Remus muttered something under his breath and instantly Sirius was awake surrounded by rolls of bread. He started to stuff them in his mouth and then looked up at Remus.
"You know Remus I love you sometimes." Sirius said with a mouth full of food. His friends got what he was saying though.
"Yes well let's hope it's not too often." Remus joked and Sirius glared at the suggestion.
"Sorry Moony I don't swing that way, I'd tell you to go after James but he's obsessed with Evans, better luck next time." Sirius teased getting his two best friends with one shot.
"Obviously you are quite blind Padfoot my friend, for I am far from gay. I can refer you to a few Ravenclaw girls if you don't believe me." Remus said turning pink with shame at his own suggestion.
Sirius clapped Remus on the back secretly proud of Remus's statement before saying, "No need for that I can simply ask Arabella."
Remus turned a deep red color and for once found himself speechless. James however had just registered what Sirius had said about him and Lily, and was determined to get revenge on his friend, "Well while you do that, I think I'll go have a talk with Samantha about that embarrassing little poem you were going to give her last year. I'm sure she'd love to hear how you think she's the most beautiful woman in the Wizarding world. I could give her one of my blackmail copies."
Sirius turned pale and Remus relaxed glad that he was no longer the center of attention.
"You wouldn't!" Sirius said rather panicky. His voice sounded a bit high pitched, "I told you that was just a badly thought out prank. I would have went through with it but I didn't want her to think I fancied her."
James smirked at Sirius's worried face.
"I suggest we change the topic before I make my own school newspaper." James flashed dangerously and Sirius automatically spoke,
"Oi Prongs you look like a geek!"
"Ah yes Sirius, tactful as always." Remus said and they all decided it was time to go to the great hall for breakfast.
S.A.G.E entered the hall and sat in their normal spot nearest from the teachers table, and farthest from the Marauders. Lily looked up at the Professors table reluctantly and found what she had worried about. The seat next to Dumbledore, usually reserved for a certain deputy headmistress, was taken by a very confused and nervous looking Madam Hootch. Dumbledore seemed very unhappy but Lily could tell he was trying not to show it.
Arabella elbowed her in the ribs and indicated to the farthest end of the table. The ever-cheerful professor Sprout was there, talking to none other than Professor McGonagall.
Lily watched her thoughtfully. McGonagall looked tired, and her usually perfect hair, though still pulled back in to a tight bun, was frizzy and less tamed than usual. Her clothes were even slightly wrinkled. She looked older and more worn out than Lily had ever seen her. Lily surveyed the table more closely and noted that all of the female teachers were on one side, and all of the male teachers were on the other side.
"This isn't good." Arabella said voicing Lily's opinion exactly.
"It's all my fault." Lily said her eyes starting to tear.
"No it's not. This has nothing to do with you Lily, you hear me, I hate the way you always blame yourself." Samantha let out exasperated.
Lily wiped her eyes and smiled slightly.
"I'm sorry. I know it's not totally my fault but I did ask them for help yesterday and that's when it went public." Lily continued, but she had stopped even the idea of crying.
"That may be so but it would have come out either way." Arabella said logically evaporating Lily's doubt completely.
"You're right let's stop all of this drama and talk about something else. Samantha what's the matter with you?" Lily asked abruptly as Samantha had accidentally poured milk on to Lily's lap while staring at something behind Arabella.
"What did Sirius walk in or something?" Arabella stared in a joking matter but than her eyes widened with shock.
Lily stopped wiping the milk from her robes to ask, "What is wrong with you two? What could possibly be so important that…" But she never did finish that sentence as she stared in awe.
James Potter and company had walked in to the hall and James looked like a prefects dream. He looked quite handsome but in a gentlemanly way instead of the sexy prankster the school knew and mostly loved.
The hall had become silent until Samantha started laughing hysterically. Lily looked at her friend, unable to see the humor in the situation. Samantha let out, "This is your best prank yet!"
The hall, excluding Arabella, Lily, The Marauders themselves, the professors, and Slythern, exploded with laughter. James threw up his hands in frustration and yelled, "What's so funny, do you all think me being good is so impossible?" This earned him another serenade of laughter including to his surprise the Slytherns.
Lily stood up angrily and pointed a finger at James, "Leave it to you to make a joke out of being responsible! Just because you can't control yourself doesn't mean that you can make fun of us who can!"
She believed this was a cruel joke of his against prefects. Lily stood up teary eyed and walked out of the hall with not even a glance in James direction. During Lily's outburst the hall had been silent, James turned to where Lily had just left and said, "But I'm not joking I really am trying to be good." At this the hall erupted with laughter again. And that was the last thing Lily heard as she made her way through the halls.
Dumbledore dared a glance at Professor McGonagall who he noticed looked very displeased. He knew in his heart that James had been trying to do the right thing but how on earth could he make Minerva see that.
"What the bloody hell is wrong with that girl?" James asked as the marauders made their way to charms class.
"Who?" Peter asked dumbly.
"Samantha you dim wit!" James roared.
"Don't call her names James, she thought it was a joke. We do tend to pull inappropriate pranks quite often. You can't blame her for thinking this was one of them." Sirius put in defensively.
"Next time tell your girlfriend to mind her own business." James snapped.
"She's not my girlfriend, if she was then you wouldn't be here right now after insulting her." Sirius growled.
"I dare you to try Sirius Black." James said emphasizing his last name.
Sirius was about to lunge at James when Remus said,
"Boys do I need to separate you two."
Both were ashamed at what they had said so in unison they said,
"No…" then added, "Mother." They grinned at each other at the shared joke.
"If I were either one of your mothers I'd have killed you by now. Seeing as you're both alive I highly doubt that's possible." He said smugly.
"Look I'm sorry I didn't mean what I said." James said to Sirius. Remus interjected,
"It's perfectly alright just don't do it again."
The group laughed and James punched Remus in the arm.
"Not you. I was talking to Sirius." James said and Sirius nodded his approval.
"I know how we can get him back James." Sirius piped up and then signaled something to James using his fingers.
Then out of nowhere both boys grabbed Remus in a hug. Peter always the follower, joined in. Remus turned pale.
"Public affection, gross." Remus said and managed to throw Peter off of him. James and Sirius were proving to be a much harder case. Sirius had wrapped himself around Remus's body and James had a tight hold on one of his arms. Suddenly he had an idea. He moved slowly due to the extra weight over to the charms class.
"No use my dear friend nothing can tear us from you now!" Sirius managed to say before Remus yelled,
"Samantha! Lily! Please help me!"
Samantha got up instantly and headed to him from across the room. Lily reluctantly got up hoping it wasn't another trick.
Samantha stood on Sirius's side and nibbled at his ear. He fell down in heap on the floor before swiftly getting up and following her across the room like a lost puppy.
"Do it again! Do it again!" he begged as they sat.
Lily walked up to James warily. She looked up at Remus.
"What exactly am I supposed to do?" she asked Remus.
"You're the witch you figure it out. I 'm a guy I don't posses the female power of controlling men. Just think of something quick please I detest public affection." Remus answered looking quite desperate.
Lily scrunched up her nose then sighed.
"I'll help you under one condition." She said and then whispered in to Remus's other ear so that James could not hear.
Remus turned a deep red.
"Lily!" he let out quite embarrassed.
Lily stood firm.
"It's either that or you have James as a permanent decoration. My those would be some awkward rumors." She suggested with a smirk.
Remus blushed furiously and said, "Fine just do it already!"
Lily turned back to James disgusted. She stood on her tipi toes, they are a lot taller, and kissed James full on the mouth causing him to fall backwards on the ground and hit his head quite hard. Lily blushed a crimson red and returned to her seat with odd looks from everyone in class, even Remus.
"Thanks." Remus said, and sat down looking at the floor with embarrassment at what he had promised.
James sat up in a dreamy unconscious way. All he could say was, "Wow!" as their teacher entered the room.
After class James was still beaming.
"Remus, I owe you big time!" he let out enthusiastically.
"You have no idea." Remus said and turned red instantly thinking about it.
"What is she making you do anyway?" Sirius asked wiping lipstick off of various places on his face. He and Samantha did have a very eventful class.
"Nothing that should concern you." Remus said panicky.
James stopped him abruptly and announced,
"It has to do with a girl doesn't it?"
At this Remus backed up slightly and turned a deeper shade of red. He didn't want to think about it let alone discuss it.
"It does!" Sirius answered for him with a grin.
"What does she want you to do ask Arabella out or something?" James asked incredulously.
At the mention of Arabella Remus felt his ears burn wondering how she would feel about Lily's favor.
"Or something…" he replied felling butterfly's circling around in his stomach.
He wasn't good at this sort of thing. He desperately wished that she would have asked Sirius or anyone else but him.
"Brilliant!" Samantha let out when Lily had told her and Arabella about her little plan.
"So basically you asked him to pretend to be dating you so that James would stop pestering you and McGonagall wouldn't have to worry about him bothering you. You seriously think that Remus will be spared because he's James friend instead of being hexed like all of the others that tried to date you before?" Arabella asked incredulously, summing up what Lily had told them.
"Uh-huh so don't get jealous while we are acting, it's all part of the plan. I'll leave Remus to you once Potter backs off." Lily explained.
"And if he doesn't?" Arabella asked doubtfully.
Lily let out a laugh and said jokingly,
"How does Lily Lupin sound to you?"
Samantha laughed and Arabella threw a book at her friend.
"What's this? Arabella throwing a book of all things!" Samantha said half serious, half jokingly.
"There are always exceptions to the rules." Arabella said as Lily laughed and Samantha pretended to faint at the idea.
"Well there is plan B." Lily announced after they had settled down a bit.
"And what pray tell might that be?" Arabella asked.
"Hex James Potter in to oblivion. It's always been a sick fantasy of mine." Lily let out as she heard familiar footsteps behind her, then to her great dread James Potter said,
"Did I just hear the words sick fantasy and my name in the same sentence come out of prefect Lily Evans mouth?"
Sirius laughed and said,
"You're not dreaming it this time Prongs old boy, I heard it too."
Remus blushed at the situation. When should he start his promise? Lily ignored James and Sirius's taunts. She looked over at Remus and smiled.
"Oh Remus you can ask me that question that you wanted to ask tomorrow in the library at eight o'clock." Lily said meaningfully, and Remus nodded his head in understanding. He looked over at Arabella who looked slightly grim.
Arabella looked up at him and smiled knowingly. 'Good,' he thought, 'At least it won't hurt her.'
James looked over at Remus questioningly. He was far from jealous though. Remus wasn't exactly the heartthrob of the school. Sure he matched James and Sirius in looks but he wasn't smooth or confident with girls. Remus was the sweet Ravenclaw catcher but surely Lily didn't see him in that way. So James brushed it off as nothing and continued his conversation.
Remus Lupin walked to the library very upset. He didn't like the situation that he had gotten himself in. James would be furious, Sirius would probably have a cow at how disloyal Remus was, and Lily would be all over him in front of them. Needless to say he was feeling quite sick as Lily waved him over to her.
She immediately got to the point, "Alright we'll start our act when we see each other tomorrow."
Remus turned visibly pale. Lily looked up at him quizzically before she continued,
"I suppose we'll sit next to each other in the great hall at breakfast."
Remus hesitated, then sighed, and said, "A promise is a promise."
"Thank you Remus you are a wonderful friend." She said kissing him on the cheek and walking out of the library.
Remus blushed and then muttered, "Tell that to James."
The next day the marauders, minus one Remus Lupin, entered the Great Hall for an early breakfast. James immediately looked around the hall for a certain red-haired girl and sat up as he noted that she wasn't there. He let out a sigh and wondered where Remus had gone off to in such a big hurry that morning.
Just as he was biting in to a piece of bacon Sirius hit his arm causing the fork to drop. James looked up at his friend angrily until he saw Sirius's wide-eyed shocked look.
"What is it Sirius?" he asked frightened.
"Prongs I don't know how to tell you this but Lily's got a boyfriend." Sirius let out partly breathless.
James snorted in disbelief. He didn't even look away from his breakfast as he said,
"No guy in this school would dare mess with us Marauders."
"Prongs my dear friend I don't think he'll have to worry about that because he is one." Sirius said as delicately as possible.
The fork that James had just picked up fell out of his hand with a clang at Sirius's words. He looked up hoping Sirius had been playing a joke when he saw a red Remus and happy Lily walking hand in hand to her end of the table.
James had on a shocked and hurt expression. Sirius watched his friend hoping that James wouldn't do something terrible to Remus but at the same time wanting to kill Moony himself.
As Lily and Remus sat down rumors were frantically going around the hall. Samantha managed to catch some of these as she rushed to sit by her friends.
"Lily it's working! The whole group of Ravenclaw Girls want to kill you and the Hufflepuff boys want to seriously damage Remus, they wouldn't actually kill him, their to nice for that. But isn't it wonderful!" she said plopping down next to an irritated looking Arabella.
"You think it's wonderful that the Ravenclaw girls want me dead. Excuse me if I don't share your joy." Lily said wryly.
"What I meant was that it's great your plan is working." She corrected stuffing handfuls of food in to her mouth.
Remus looked over at her disgusted,
"Where have I seen this before?" he let out and looked over to where Sirius was, this horrible news didn't seem to have affected his appetite, "Ah yes now I remember."
Samantha shot him a nasty look, then she stopped and seemed to be contemplating something before saying, "I almost forgot to ask him for a rematch. HEY SIRIUS!" She suddenly yelled.
He turned to her curiously with milk dripping down his face, "WHAT?!" He yelled back testily not bothering to wait till his mouth was emptied entirely.
"FOOD EATING REMATCH SATURDAY." She continued.
"OH ALL RIGHT." He answered back before turning to his friend James who hadn't taken his eyes off of Remus and Lily since he had seem them.
Remus felt awkward, he turned to Lily and whispered, "Can we just stop the madness?"
She shook her head no and Remus continued to look miserable.
Arabella looked over at James with pity. Even though she knew what Remus and Lily were doing she still felt jealousy creeping up her spine at every touch and gesture they made. She could not even imagine how James felt.
Later in the boys dormitory Remus was having an awful time. So awful in fact that he would have rather been pretending to be Lily's boyfriend in front of the whole school than be there right now.
Sirius had been down right evil. He paced the room and insulted Remus in everyway possible. This included words like , "Disloyal" "Liar" "Heartless fiend" "Jerk" "Snake" "Slythern Wannabee" and worst of all "Wolf-boy." Peter chimed in evilly once in a while, following Sirius example. He taunted Remus who tried his best to be patient knowing that they didn't mean what they were saying.
But the worst of all of this was James. He was in his bed under the covers, just staring at Remus. His eyes were misty like he was about to cry. But all he did was stare in an amazed, shocked, hurt expression that tore Remus's heart out. Until at last it dawned upon him that he had promised Lily to act like her boyfriend, but he had not promised her that he'd keep it a secret from James, or the other Marauders.
He quickly jumped up, a smile on his face, and told Sirius to shut up. Sirius looked at him with rage filling him.
"How dare you?! You have no right to…" he started but Remus interjected quickly,
"Do you want to here the truth or not?" He questioned and Sirius was silent immediately.
Remus looked James in the eye and said,
"James this is all an act. Remember when Lily whispered in my ear and I made her a promise that if she got you to let me go I'd do something for her. Well this was what she made me promise. To pretend to be her boyfriend to get you off of her back and to stop McGonagall from worrying about you with her."
James sat up and then it dawned on him. Of course it was all an act, Remus was one of his best friends he would never betray him. But he would also never go back on a promise.
"Thank Merlin! I thought we'd never get past this. Sorry about calling you all of those names you know you're the best Moony." Sirius let out ashamed that he had ever doubted his sweet Sandy haired friend.
"It's alright Sirius you were just upset. We all know you're a loyal friend." Remus said back thankful that this whole business was over with.
"Do you know what this means?" James asked them all with a mischievous grin.
They all looked at him afraid to ask until Sirius said,
"That Lily Evans is going to get paid back and your going to help me." He finished.
"Remus I don't understand. Why are you taking me to the lake? And why are you acting so strange? If I didn't know any better I'd think James had used a Polyjuice Potion to look like you." Lily let out and laughed at the suggestion.
The Remus look a like laughed too but more of a nervous laugh then a real one. Lily didn't seem to notice as they sat down and put their legs in the water.
"Lily dear I've been thinking…" he started but Lily laughed and interrupted him,
"Remus you don't have to call me sweet nicknames unless James is around, I'm not actually your girlfriend you know. The promise was to pretend to date."
"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. This has been amazing and I really do like you Lily. Here I'll just show you now." The look a like said and started to kiss Lily passionately.
She stared wide eyed at who she thought was Remus Lupin. 'He's a good kisser' she noticed and closed her eyes. Then it hit her. This was Remus Lupin, Arabella's Remus Lupin. It wasn't right! But why did it feel right. She was about to push him off when she heard a click.
She pushed him back and looked away,
"Remus I do not like you! I can't believe you would do something like this. It was all an act for James and I probably shouldn't have done it but I was trying to help Professor McGonagall and I was mad at him and… You like Arabella what were you thinking!" she said then turned around and gasped.
There standing before her were Sirius Black and James Potter smirking. Remus wasn't even present.
"Where did Remus go?" she let out exasperated.
"Come now Evans you're brighter than that." Sirius said holding up a picture of her and James kissing.
"Give me that!" Lily said furiously.
"I know that you'd love to have this picture for memories sake but I've got other plans. I'm sure you'll get one while they're circulating around the school." Sirius said evilly lifting the paper over her short head.
"Sirius." She warned.
James still had a dreamy look on his face from the kiss and couldn't seem to snap out of it until Lily stepped on Sirius's foot causing the photo to slip out of his hands. James grabbed it before Lily had the chance and tucked it in to his boxers.
"Sorry Evans but we can't let you do that." James said gleefully.
Lily sighed knowing she would not retrieve the picture now.
"So what is it you two want for an exchange?" Lily asked with a sigh.
"First thing is you let Remus off on the promise," James started happily.
"Fine, doesn't look like it matters now anyway since you know." Said a grumpy Lily Evans.
"Second you spend some time with me lets say an hour a day for the next two weeks," he said and Lily let out a growl of frustration.
"Fine!" she snapped as Sirius waved it menacingly in her face.
"And thirdly you owe me a favor should I need one." He finished looking quite pleased with himself.
"Why not I'm already wasting my time with you." She said rolling her eyes.
"Deal we'll keep it out of circulation as long as you do what you've promised." James answered and Sirius ran up to the boy's dorms to hide the picture.
"Potter why must you make my life a living hell." She asked with a frown.
"You deserved this one Lily, and aren't you glad that I'm not Remus and Arabella will not be mad at you?" James replied trying desperately not to kiss her again.
Lily stood there thinking.
"Your right I am glad it's not Remus but don't think that it means I wanted it to be you, just that it could have been worse."
"Well you don't hurt me like yesterday, and I won't scare you like today." James let out and Lily walked up to her room with out a word.
"Well I personally am glad that's over with." Arabella said as Lily had retold the story to them.
"You do have to hand it to them, they are awfully crafty." Samantha added earning her a glare from Lily.
"I almost had a heart attack. As soon as I saw the real Remus I told him to forget the promise and he looked ecstatic. You don't think he was in on this do you?" she added.
"Remus! No, he would never do that to any of us." Arabella answered and blushed at the questioning looks from her friends.
"It doesn't matter now. What does matter is that McGonagall is getting worse. Now she's not only mad at Dumbledore and Potter, she's mad at his whole group. Sirius was talking to me in the hall and she gave him a detention for bothering me." Samantha added out of the blue.
"And what was it that Sirius wanted to discuss with you?" she asked as Samantha glared at her.
"None of your business Lily Evans, and that is not the point. If you want to help McGonagall you had better do it soon or she'll go mental on us." Samantha retaliated.
"Your right I do need to try to help more." Lily said biting her lip in frustration.
"Actually," Arabella said joining the conversation, "I have a plan."
"I hate this idea Arabella and I'll never forgive you for making me do it." Lily said, as her two best friends pushed her towards the boys' dormitories.
"Well actually it was you that gave me the idea, with the whole Remus thing. McGonagall knows that you only go out with responsible, prefect worthy boys so if you pretend to date James she might just go along with Dumbledore's plan." Arabella said frustrated but calm.
"So not only am I pretending to date James Potter but I am doing it so that he becomes head boy and bothers me throughout the whole year!" Lily said exasperated.
"Exactly." Samantha added happily trying to push Lily through the doorframe that she was desperately clinging on to.
"What great friends I have. With you two for friends who needs enemies." She said sarcastically fighting both girls tooth and nail.
The boys, who heard some kind of commotion out side of their door, grabbed their wands and opened it with a rush. When they say Lily's figure pressed against the doorframe and her two best friends desperately pushing her they all immediately put their wands in their robe pockets.
"Well don't just stand there you idiots help us!" Samantha yelled and Sirius immediately came to her aid with Remus trailing behind him.
The girls pushed and the guys pulled and Lily fell through the door in a heap of bodies.
"What in Merlin's name are you girls doing here?" James asked helping the girls up and then the guys. Lily snatched her hand back when he had gotten to her.
"We have a proposition for you." Samantha said grinning evilly knowing he would not pass this opportunity up.
"Do tell." Sirius said hungrily eyeing her.
"Not for you. James only I'm afraid." Samantha said smirking at Sirius's disappointed look.
"And what pray tell might that be?" James asked with one eyebrow raised in suspicion.
"We all want McGonagall and Dumbledore to make up and we think if Lily and you pretend to date then McGonagall will think you really have become responsible since she knows Lily's taste in guys." Samantha explained only slightly rambling.
James eyes flashed and he grinned happily.
"Why pretend?" he let out unable to control himself.
Lily looked at him disgusted.
"We'll that's my cue to leave." she said turning around and walking towards the door.
Five people guarded the door and three of them looked down at her reprovingly, Sirius smirked, and Peter looked as if he didn't know exactly why he was there.
"Oh no you don't." Samantha let out.
Lily sighed and turned.
"Let's just get one thing straight James Potter this is not for real, no pranks are to be made during this time, and you are to be on your best behavior." She said angrily.
"Of course Lily flower, of course." Was his reply.
The next day Minerva McGonagall was on her way to her first period class when a peculiar sight stopped her. There right in front of her eyes, which she rubbed three times, to make sure, was James Potter and Lily Evans holding hands. Minerva quickly approached them and used her wand to see if Lily was under the affect of a spell or potion, which did not seem to be the case.
"Lily is everything alright?" McGonagall asked wondering if Lily was feeling well. Maybe she was being blackmailed.
"Oh yes Po…James and I were just on our way to your class. James thought it would be fun to get there early." Lily said trying her best to act happy. It seemed to be working.
"Now, now Lily don't be so modest. She wanted to get a head start on the work and I agreed whole-heartedly. I'd do anything for my Lily flower." James lied smoothly. It seemed to be like second nature to him.
It took all of Lily's will power not to clobber him over the head let alone continue smiling stupidly, but she did. 'I hope you appreciate this Professor' Lily thought trying her best to smile sweetly at James. McGonagall looked skeptical.
"I didn't know you two were so…close." She said her eyes boring in to Lily, searching for a sign of weakness.
Lily was afraid that she was somehow giving the plan away. She was so afraid that she had to get away from McGonagall's stare fast. So Lily pulled James closed to her and hugged him. James looked surprised but covered it up by smoothly saying, "Lily not in front of a teacher!"
Lily laughed, "Oh James you can be such a prude sometimes."
James feigned a strict look, "And you can be down right mischievous sometimes. Honestly I don't even know why I'm dating someone like you."
Lily grabbed James cheek and pinched it, "Oh James I think you know exactly why you're dating me." Lily said suggestively still playing around.
McGonagall's mouth dropped in shock. James Potter was being responsible and Lily Evens was acting immature. There was only one reason this could happen,
"Has someone put a switching spell on the two of you?"
Well maybe there were two reasons.
The two teens laughed heartily.
"No Professor just rubbing off on each other I suppose." Lily let out first.
She didn't look convinced,
"Well Quidditch practice will be starting soon, Saturday to be exact."
Lily frowned and rolled her eyes, while James looked ecstatic.
"Wonderful!" James said excitedly.
"Yeah I'm jumping for joy." Lily said sarcastically.
Now McGonagall believed them.
"Well I daresay I'll see you in the stands more often now that you and James are so inseparable." McGonagall said trying to see if this was all an act or not.
"Oh yes Lily, even Quidditch would be insufferable with out you. Besides now that you're my girlfriend you'll have to go or I'll be miserable." James said flashing a grin deviously.
Lily wanted to tell him that he would be even more miserable if she had to attend but seeing as McGonagall was looking at her intently she couldn't. Instead she lifted her hand up to his hair and ruffled it.
"Oh Jamsie Pooh of course I'll go to some of your games. We could go straight to my prefects meeting after that. We could help the school together! Just like you wanted. I'll ask Dumbledore if you could join us. Won't that be just perfect Jamsie." Lily pretend cooed.
James wanted to scream at Lily but he couldn't. McGonagall was looking at him with a mixture of shock and dare he think it respect. So he simply flashed a smile and put his arm around Lily. He noted with some satisfaction that she tensed under his touch so to get her back he held her closer and all she could do was fake smile.
"Of course Lily the more time with you the better." He answered leading his hands down to her waist.
She placed her hands on his hands that were around her waist in an effort to make sure they didn't go any lower. Lily was as stiff as a board.
"Well Professor we'll be in your classroom if you need us." Lily said needing to get away from McGonagall and James hands.
As the two left McGonagall watched them. She couldn't decide if she wanted to frown or smile. 'Maybe Albus is right about James; I mean if Lily is dating him he must be somewhat responsible. But I can't just go up to Albus and apologize. After what he did! Oh why is everything so difficult!" she thought walking off towards her class.
On her way she walked in to someone and fell down.
"I'm terribly sorry I'm not usually so clumsy." She said getting off her feet then looking up in to the face of a smiling Albus Dumbledore.
"Hello Minerva." He said somewhat uncertainly.
"Well once again your timing is unbelievably perfect. I wanted to apologize for not trusting you about James, it seems I've been mistaken about him. But don't you think for one minute this means I forgive you for…well you know. I simply wanted to let you know that you have my blessing about Potter being Headboy next year." She said in a very business like manner. She turned to walk away but Albus grabbed her wrist firmly.
"Minerva I'm sorry I was just scared. Won't you ever forgive me?" he pleaded looking nothing like his usual dignified self.
"Not that easily Albus. I have a class to teach." She said icily and wrenching her arm away from him.
She started to walk away and reached the outside of her classroom. The door opened and she looked behind her to reveal Albus Dumbledore holding it. She ignored him and walked in to her class. Minerva looked to the front row to see Lily in her usual seat and James right next to her. McGonagall scanned the room looking for Samantha and noticed she was in the back row next to Sirius Black. They were hitting each other over the head with their books.
McGonagall cleared her throat and the two in question dropped what they were doing immediately.
"Good morning class." McGonagall began but Dumbledore entered and would not let her continue.
"Minerva we need to talk." He said sternly.
"Today we will be talking about what it takes to become an Animagus." Minerva continued as if Dumbledore was not there.
"Minerva McGonagall you will speak to me this instant!" Dumbledore boomed and the class all pulled their desks back as far away as they could.
"First of all you have to find your inner animal. What animal is most like you? Take our headmaster here I'd guess his animal is a particularly slimy toad…" she went on as if she had not head Dumbledore's demand.
"Minerva if you do not speak to me right now you will live to regret it." Albus barked angrily.
"Oh really," Minerva said turning around to face him, unable to ignore him any longer, "and what exactly are you going to do Albus hex me! I'd like to see you try."
Minerva pulled out her wand and thrust it in to his chest menacingly.
"Well you asked for it!" Albus yelled pulling out his own wand.
Albus twirled his wand around and suddenly Minerva was tied to a chair next to him.
"But he's not speaking?" one girl yelled confused.
"Yes that's really advanced magic." A boy agreed watching with great anticipation.
"Now will you listen to reason?" Albus asked irritably.
"Oh come now Albus you know me better than that." Minerva answered and set herself free using the tips of her fingers to wave the wand.
The next thing Dumbledore knew he was stuck to the ceiling of the room with McGonagall smiling evilly.
"Why are you being so difficult!" he screeched and dropped to the floor, releasing himself from the spell.
He concentrated on Minerva's wand and it was ripped out of her hands suddenly. He smiled a smug grin.
"Well now you have to listen to me my dearest Professor." He added triumphantly.
"Not a chance." She spat and changed herself into her Animagus form, a cat.
McGonagall ran around the room dodging spells from Dumbledore's wand. She even managed to scratch him a few times while she scurried across the floor. After a few minutes Dumbledore's spell hit and Minerva had to get up from under a desk she had tried to duck under. She sighed and dusted off her robes then concentrated on the bottom of Dumbledore's robes as he tried to talk to her.
"Now I wanted to say that I was sorry, I just wasn't ready but…" he started but James interrupted him.
"Professor." He started and Albus wheeled around to look at him sitting next to Lily in the front row.
"James what are you doing in the front? Oh now I see why Minerva accepted you as headboy. Congratulations." He said the last part in a whisper.
"Professor listen." James began again.
"Not now James can't you see Minerva and I are having a discussion?" Albus continued.
"Yes sir but I thought you'd like to know that your robes are on fire." He ended quietly and Dumbledore turned to see that he was right.
He flicked his hand and the fire ceased immediately but the burn was still there.
"Ah the powers of wand less magic." McGonagall beamed.
"As I was saying, I'm ready now." Albus stated matter-of-factly.
"Sure you are." Minerva said sarcastically obviously not believing one word of it.
"I am and I'll prove it!"
"And how exactly are you going to do that?" she asked looking board.
Albus sighed, then grabbed Minerva and pressed his lips against hers. McGonagall's eyes widened in shock. Most of the boys in class whooped at Dumbledore's bravery. Most of the girls let out a resounding, "AWWW." James looked confused and Lily looked like she was about to faint.
When Dumbledore finished, McGonagall looked a bit dazed. She tried to straighten herself out and look respectable. She spoke out in a high-pitched voice, "Class dismissed." As most of the class started to file out, Sirius and Samantha leading the way, the only two students left were Lily and James.
Lily walked up to McGonagall.
"Professor I have a confession to make. James and I aren't dating we just pretended so that you and Dumbledore wouldn't fight and to prove that James could be head boy." Lily confessed guiltily.
McGonagall cocked one eyebrow and then did something utterly unexpected. She laughed.
"It's not that unbelievable." James mumbled so that only Dumbledore could hear.
When she finally recovered Minerva turned to Lily and said,
"You are quite a good actress my dear, if I were you I would not have been able to keep a straight face. I thought the world had turned upside down when you said you were dating him."
Lily joined in the laughter.
"I know could you imagine. The whole world would end if that ever happened." Lily joined in.
Minerva was doubled over with laughter.
"And when he said that thing about Quidditch I thought you were going to pass out but then when you answered with those prefect meetings I thought I would."
Lily looked up at her through tears of mirth,
"I was wondering what you thought about that."
"Well I'm glad you both find this terribly amusing." James said in a stern voice, which only made then laugh harder, and Dumbledore try to hide a grin.
"Well James I still give you my blessing to be headboy if only for the amusement of it all." McGonagall let out after she had finally stopped laughing.
"Oh yes hysterical." James said sarcastically and resolved to make sure he did his job so well that they wouldn't be able to laugh at him anymore.
"I'm so glad I don't have to pretend to be your girlfriend. It's as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders." Lily said walking out the door.
"Bye Professors." Both students called as James hurried to catch up.
"With that in mind Lily would you like to go out with me this weekend?" James asked and the professors distinctly heard,
"Give it a rest Potter." Before turning to face each other with smiles planted on their faces.
"When will he learn?" Minerva asked leaning against Albus.
"I doubt he ever will." Albus said grabbing a hold of Minerva's hand and walking down the hallway with her.
"But he'll never get her." She insisted.
"I don't know about that Minerva stranger things have happened." He said his eyes twinkling with mischief, and an all-knowing look upon his face.
Then he leaned down and kissed her, which she responded to with out thought.