Author's Notes: This is a work in progress, I'll be uploading chapters every other day, so make sure you keep checking back or DOOM SHALL BEFALL YOU ALL!

Mindless Note: Heehee, I was at my friend's graduation today singing the doom song to "Pomp and Circumstances" isn't that just so fitting? And then later I said, "Esther, you little graduate, heed these words of advice wisely *starts singing the doom song again*"

Disclaimer: Not mine, I'm not that messed up!, so don't sue.

Title: Nothing Else Matters

Author: Celtic Air, who wants to know why she's writing so much Zim-fic anyway... weird obsessive compulsions!

"Class," Miss Labonita said in a sickeningly cheerful voice, in compare to Ms. Bitters Dib's tenth grade teacher was Martha Stewart. "I would like to introduce you to your new classmate."

Dib picked his head up from the metaphysics book he was reading. Subconsciously he looked towards Zim, there must have been some mix up with the school computers because they were always in the same class. Then he looked up at the tall new classmate, inquisitively. Why did all his misadventures start with a being introduced to a new classmate? Well, this one would be watched very carefully.

"Hello, I am Mal Colm. I just moved here from Long Island. To introduce you to me I have prepared a short demonstration that Miss Labonita has been kind enough to let me show you."

Dib steadied himself and prepared for the worst: hypnotism, alien warfare, a really long and boring talk about Mal's life. He was happily surprised though when Mal started a slideshow of flying saucer photographs he had taken himself. The pictures were all extraordinary well shot and Mal continued the demonstration by listing various paranormal groups he was involved with: Ghost Hunters of America, Sky Chasers,

"Any questions--" Mal was cut off by the school bell ringing and ending period 3.

The students milled out of the classroom and Dib took the opportunity to run up to Mal and shout out, "Hello, fellow alien hunter, Did you know that there is an actual extraterrestrial being right here in this school, under the same roof we're standing under right not?! Help me nab him and I might just let you share my discovery."

"I'm sorry, what was your name?"

"Dib," He looked up expectantly.

"Ah, yes... Dib," Mal seemed positively bored, "Well Dib, you are an amateur. I do not work with amateurs." He started to walk away but Dib went after him.

"But I have proof!"

"Yeah, that's what all the crazies say," Mal walked out into the throng of students in the crowded hallway.

"..but I have proof..." Dib whispered unhappily to himself as he watched his hope vanish. Of course the other students never listened to him, but they were just clueless to their environment. He could understand that he supposed. Still, how could another hunter like himself turn away from substantial evidence, not even to look at it, a brief glance, one second... it was all Dib was asking for. "They'll never listen."

At lunch that afternoon, Zim was eating lunch with Gaz. It has become a daily ritual for them by now. They would meet for lunch and discuss how to piss Dib off the most. Their discussions had led to some interesting situations for Dib to get himself out of, but it was all in fun... at least, most of it was. Still, truth was Zim still hated the little alien hunters' guts.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Zim queried.

"What do YOU want to do today?" Gaz returned the question without even looking up from her gameslave, "Besides disembowel my brother?"

"Ooooh! I like that idea!" Zim smiled at her playfully, "We could make a game out of it!"

"How about you just come over my house and play Death Robot Killer Avengers with me?"

Zim paused. This was it! The moment he had been waiting for years to experience! He had been invited over Gaz's house! Today! "Uh.. sure, I--I guess, um... okay?"

Gaz laughed and paused her game to tease him, "You may be an Irken Invader, Zim, but you're still shy around girls. Can I just say: Awwww..."

"Stop That!" Zim blushed purple, trying to take back his authoritative pride.


"Stop It!" He kicked her under the table.

She kicked him back and then they started a rather violent game of footsie.

That is until Dib slammed his bookbag on the cafeteria table, "I hate him!"

"Oh, coem on, Dib, we weren't doing anything, were we Zim," Gaz threw Zim a kiss. She sure did love to piss Dib off.

Dib forced himself not to gag. "Not him," He said gesturing to the Irken, "Well... not so much, at least today. No, today I have reserved all my contempt and hatred for HIM!" He pointed over to Mal, who was surrounded by crowd of adoring fans, all who wanted to hear tales of tracking ghosts, goblins, and aliens. "You know, he probably just gets al his stories from 'Mysterious Mysteries'."

Zim chortled maniacally, "You, brain deficient earthling can't even get one of your own kind to believe you! PATHETIC!"

"Just wait, Zim," Dib narrowed his eyes at the alien and then marched out of the cafeteria.

The last bell of the day rang and the students stampeded out of the school. Gaz went to her locker and found some tall, dark stranger leaning against it. On further inspection she saw that it was the new kid Dib had pointed to before.

"Would you kindly remove yourself from my way before I beat you repeatedly over the head with your arm?" Gaz curtly tried to push him out of the way.

"What's the hurry, precious?"

"Did-- did you just call me 'precious'?"

Mal nodded.

Gaz swiftly kicked him in the nuts.

He gasped and collapsed while Gaz just stepped over him and opened her locker.

Then Mal stood back up and used his hand to slam the locker shut, luckily Gaz hadn't been in the way. "You're awfully 'spry'."

"Do you really need another kick?"

"Oh, come on, I'm just making conversation here, pet. OWW!" He had received another kick. While lying on the floor he deiced it was best to try and change strategies, "I've brought you a gift, Gaz." Mal opened a jewlery box and a necklace with a glowign stone stared up at her.

Gaz was mesmerized instantly, it was beautiful and it was calling to her.

"Would you like me to put it on you?" Mal paused and waited for Gaz to nod. With nimble fingers he put it around Gaz's neck and closed the clasp.

The stone's glow seemed to enter Gaz's body for a second, after that it looked like an ordinary diamond.

"Come home with me, Gaz," Mal ordered.

Like a giggling schoolgirl, she draped her arm over his. They left the school together.

Zim had been waiting outside for Gaz to come out and walk with him to her place. Hen he saw them, they almost looked like a cheerleader and head football player.


"Zim, I'm so sorry. I'll have to put a rain check on our plans for like forever, 'kay?"

Zim was stunned as Mal walked away with his crush. "I hate him!"

"Now, Gaz," Mal had brought her back to his apartment. She was seated in a small chair as he shined a light into her face. Gaz didn't mind, she didn't even notice, she just continued to play with the diamond necklace. "Tell me everything you know about Zim."

Some part of her tried to fight it, but she could not stop from telling him everything, "Zim came to earth five years ago..."

That night Dib paced the hallway in his house. It was past midnight and Gaz still wasn't home. He was worried. Sure she pissed him off more than most, but little sisters are supposed to. And big brothers are supposed to protect them from alien brain suckers waiting out there in the dark.

He grimaced and looked once again at the clock, which said it was only one minute past the last time he looked. Where could she be?!

Dib picked up the phone and started to dial the police.

Right at that moment Gaz walked in, looking wasted "Hi yaaa, Dib-by." She giggled, "How's my big bro doing this fine fine evenining?" She tripped and landed on the stairs that led upstairs to their bedrooms. "Opps..."

"What did Zim do to you?!" Dib asked in an accusing tone.

Gaz smirked, "Wasn't with Zimmmmmmm... Mal brought me to his house, we had fun, fun, fun... weeee!... and then all the way home." She climbed the stairs again.

Dib watched her stumble getting to her bedroom. He had never seen her drunk before, "This. Is. Not. Good."

Dib was getting breakfast before school the next morning, eating the most sugary cereal he could find.

A blond walked into the kitchen and went to the refrigerator.

"Who are you?" Dib jumped up into a false karate pose as soon as he noticed her, "And I warn you, I am highly adept at... Chu-fu... and.... um... Tim Buk Toe..."

"Oh, brother dear," Gaz faced him and took a bite out of the apple she was having for breakfast. In a huge smile she asked, "Who ever do you think it would be?"

"GAZ!" His jaw dropped. "It can't be you!"

"Oh, you mean the new hairstyle," She swooshed her hair in the air, "Or do you mean the clothes? You know," She gestured to the pink sundress, "They're like all the rage... I decided to stop being a goth, it just wasn't spiritually fulfilling."

"Wha--" Dib almost fell over in shock, "Are you a robot?"




"An experiment gone horribly horribly wrong?"


Dib scratched his head and walked out of the room. He sat down on the couch and turned on a video game.

In a deep demonic voice Gaz growled, "But the GameSlave Station is still mine!" She picked her brother up with one hand, flung him across the room, and in a sweet childish voice added, "Thank you."

Dib felt the bump forming on his head where it had hit the wall. "That was like the Pepsi commercial from hell!" How could his sister have gotten so strong? Without pausing to think of it he ran out of the room, afraid his sister might try another wrestling move on him.

"Hey, Zimmy, zim, zim, zim!" Gir pounced up on his master's bed.

Zim grunted softly and pulled the covers up over his head.

"Master, you're going to be late to school," Gir held up a soggy paper bag, "I packed you a cupcake!"

"I'm not going to school today Gir."

"Awwwww... why?"

"Because Gaz doesn't like me."

"Awwwww... why?"

"Because there's a new Dib-like person taking over."

"Awwwww... why?" Gir was staring to sound like a toddler so Zim pushed him off the bed.

"Fine. Fine.. Five more minutes, Gir," Zim said sleepily, "Then I'll prepare to meet my doom."

"Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom," Gir started singing and walked out of the room.

In school that day, Gaz avoided everyone except Mal, whom Dib was getting suspicious of. It was appallingly strange; Gaz had so drastically changed overnight. Except for one thing, her GameSlave. She was playing it even more these days, if that was possible.

As the week wore on she had gotten sent to the principal's office no less than eight times for playing games in class.

She had also become increasingly popular in the past week, Dib noted. Not a night went by when she didn't come home after midnight half delirious from her new boyfriends house. The cool kids now accepted her because they accepted Mal, its just the way things work in school.

Zim had become increasingly despondent, Dib realized. He rarely came to class anymore, and he was late most of the time. He was back to begin friendless without Gaz to hang out with. In addition, he had become increasingly forgetful. Once he had come to class without one of his contacts in place, which he explained as an 'eye problem'. Of course everyone bought the lie. Except Dib, but they wouldn't listen to him anyway.

The last straw in all of this for Dib came on Friday. Little Miss Popular came to him after school, dressed in a ridiculous orange and blue cheerleader costume.

"Hey, Dib, just wanted to see if my best bro would wish me luck before I go try out for cheerleadng."

"Cheerleading? You're a cheerleader now?!"

"Isn't it neat?" Gaz smiled brightly, "Well, bye now." She ran over to where Mal was waiting and gave him a huge kiss.

"Ugh, I think I'm going to be sick," Dib groaned as his sister went off to be one of the conforming sheep.

"My sentiments exactly," Zim added, spooking Dib who had thought he was alone. "Mal's a Spoot-Spooty head!"

"Spooty head?" Dib looked bewildered.

"It's an Irken curse," The green boy shrugged.

"Right," Dib grimaced and wondered what he was going to do about his sister.

"Dib, are you pondering what I'm pondering?" Zim rubbed his hands together menacingly.

"No, Zim, I rarely think about taking over the earth," Dib started to walk away but Zim called him back.

"It seems we have a common enemy, Earth-beast. An Irken Invader is not above befriending an ally to rid himself of another even more menacing foe..."

"Oh, god no. No. NO! There is no way I'm helping you E.T. Boy!"

"Even if it will help you save your sister?" Zim smirked, he had him there. They were both stuck, they both knew it... but it was for Gaz.

"I HATE MY LIFE!" Dib screamed out to whomever would listen. He kicked a locker and then nodded. "Fine, Zim, it seems I have no choice."