Title: A Christmas Tale…

Summary: Thor plus mistletoe, equals two very embarrassed Air Force officers! S/J Christmas fluff, ONESHOT!

Setting: Mid season 8

Pairings: Sam/Jack

Rating. This fic is rated T for safety, I'd say more like K +

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story, nor do I own any rights whatsoever to the TV show 'Stargate SG-1.' That show and all related indicia are copyright MGM/UA and Showtime Inc. I am receiving no profit whatsoever from the creation and posting of this story. Thank you.

A/N: Merry Christmas everyone!


Chapter One: Mistletoe upon mistletoe…

"Merry Christmas trees are here, tastiest trees of all the year, eat them… eat them… happy children eat the trees, may we have some more of these? Oh, please daddy, we love trees at Christmas time… Oh and, Merry Christmas trees are here..."

Sam Carter stopped in her tracks. "Sir?" she asked, spinning around on her heels. She had heard Jack sing some 'strange' songs since the first day she meant him, but, 'eating Christmas trees'?

Jack O'Neill stopped in the middle of the song. "Carter!" He greeted, surprised. "Uh- hi."

"Good morning, sir," she replied as she walked over to him. "What's with the song?" she couldn't help but ask.

"What song?"

"The Christmas tree eating song."

"Oh." He shoved his hands into his pockets bashfully. "That one. I made it up."

Sam raised an eyebrow, she wasn't surprised, but she was curious about it…

"Oh, come on Carter, you've seen the old Little Women, haven't you?"

Sam gave a simple nod.

"You know the 'Merry Christmas time is here' song? You just change the words and Voila! You got a funny song all kids enjoy!" He gave her a goofy grin. "And they really do, you know, like 'em…"

Sam burst into laughter. "I'm sure they do, sir." Her laughter turned into a wide smile. "Got another one?"

Jack raised his brows. "Yeah…"

Sam hoped he'd offer to sing it, but when he didn't say anything, she asked. "Can I hear it?"

"Oh! Okay… let me see…" He tapped his head, as if it would help him think. "Oh! You 'O Christmas tree, o Christmas tree'?"

"O Tannenbaum?" When he nodded, she smiled. "That's one of my dad's favorites. We'd sing that on Christmas eve."

"Well, check out this version."

Sam smiled.

"O Christmas lights, o Christmas lights, them bulbs sometimes need changing. O Christmas lights, o Christmas lights, them bulbs sometimes need changing. Not only green, but red and blue, and also yellow, this is true. O Christmas lights, o Christmas lights, them bulbs sometimes need changing…"

Another little laugh escaped Sam, but this time, it was intermingled with another.

They both turned to see Daniel standing behind them, doing his best to hold his laughter back, and failing miserably.

"Jack, I've heard you say some funny things in the past, but…" He trailed off with a fit of giggles. "I didn't know you were a song writer."

Jack smiled. "I made them up for Charlie." His voice grew quiet.

Sam hesitated before speaking, choosing her words carefully. "I'm sure he really liked them. They were probably some of his favorite Christmas songs."

Jack nodded proudly. "They were."

Daniel smiled. "Well, I should probably be getting home. It's been a long night."

"Daniel," Jack said, looking down at his wristwatch. "It's 0900."

"Yeah, I know. I was up all night. I'm going home to get some sleep."

"Good night, Daniel." "'Night, Danny boy."

Daniel gave them both a wave, before disappearing around a corner.

Sam turned to the General. "Cute songs…" she complimented, before heading towards the elevators.

"Thank you," he said, jogging to catch up with her. "I thought so, but then again, I tend to be a little biased."

Sam smiled, and pressed the button to close the doors. "Wasn't there a briefing this morning?"

Jack shook his head. "I canceled it. No one's going off-world four days before Christmas, sorry."

Sam sucked in her cheeks.

"What's wrong?"

"Hmm? Oh, nothing."

The elevator 'dinged' and the doors opened.

"Oh my god," came the simultaneous exclamation.

The entirety of Level 28 was filled with mistletoe. Literally. It hung from the ceiling, plastered the walls, and heaps of it covered the floor.

Sam peeked her head out of the elevator. "Who did this?"

Walter appeared from behind a particular tall pile of the green plant. "Good morning General O'Neill, Colonel Carter."

Jack stepped out of the elevator and onto a patch of mistletoe. He looked around the hallway and stopped, turning back to Walter. "Did you do this?"

"No, sir!"

"Who did?" Sam questioned, gingerly making her way to the technician.

"It-it was-" He didn't have to finish. At that moment, a bright light appeared, leaving behind one of everyone's favorite aliens.


"Greetings, General O'Neill, Colonel Carter. It is good to see you," the Asgard said, giving them the equivalent of an Asgard smile.

"Thor… did you do all this?" Jack asked doubtfully. He knew the alien was capable of doing it, but why was another story.

"Yes. I have been learning a lot about your Christmas culture, and find the Christmas season fascinating. My favorite tradition is the hanging of the 'mistletoe'. I realized your base did not have any, so I beamed some down." Thor looked around. "Is it enough?"

Sam coughed and smiled. "It's beautiful Thor," she said. "But, a little…" she trailed off as his bright black eyes focused on her.

"Yes?" he questioned.

"I mean, we do decorate with mistletoe, but not quite as…"

"Colonel Carter? Are you all right?" Thor cocked his head, studying her.

Sam's face was turning red; she stuffed her hands in her pockets, not sure what else to say. "Um…"

"What she means is, she's never seen something so decorative before." Jack supplied.

"Yes!" Sam said, relieved. "That's what I meant, thank you General."

Jack gave her a small nod.

Thor seemed pleased. "Thank you." He looked around the hall once more. "I was about to beam down some 'snow' as well, but I didn't know if it was wise to mix mistletoe with snow. Perhaps the leaves would have been frost bitten."

Sam managed to suppress a giggle. "That's all right, Thor."

"If you'll excuse me, sir," Walter said in a strangled tone as he hurried off… somewhere.

"O'Neill," Thor started. "I believe it is your custom to kiss under the mistletoe."

Now it was Jack's turn to ramble. "Uh- Thor, we… I…"

Thor looked at him curiously. He wasn't accustomed to hearing the human's stammer. As a general rule, they were both rather well spoken. "Yes, O'Neill?"

"Thor, I'm her commanding officer. I can't kiss… Carter."

"O'Neill. It is Christmas. It is a tradition."

"Yes, I know, but…" Jack turned to Sam for some help. But she didn't seem to know how to tell their little friend they couldn't kiss each other.

Thor actually looked disappointed. "Perhaps mistletoe was not the right thing to do," he said. "I shall beam it up momentarily."

"No! Thor!" Jack and Sam cried simultaneously. They looked at each other.

"It's a wonderful thought…" Sam said softly. "We would…" she stopped and looked at the General. "Love to continue on with the tradition…"

"We would?" Jack mouthed.

"You would?" Thor looked at her hopefully.

"Yes," Sam said decidedly. "For Thor," she whispered.

The alien looked pleased. "You may begin the tradition whenever you like."

The two air force officers turned to each other. Neither of them made the first move.

Sam's heart pounded so loudly she was sure everyone could hear it.

Jack still couldn't believe Carter had actually said they'd kiss for Thor! Sure, he'd thought of it many times, but, he never thought they would do it… for real anyways; he'd kissed her in the time loop, and she had tried to seduce him when she was animal crazy, but it was all under an alien influence of sorts. I guess you could call this one of those too…

After a moment of silence, Thor piped up. "O'Neill?"

"Just a minute!" He took a deep breath and let it out. "Of, for cryin' out loud." He turned to Carter and kissed her. He assumed that this would be more of a peck on the lips, put on for Thor. He soon realized how wrong he was.

The quick kiss quickly turned into a passionate one. (Which I will not go into much further detail.)

"Jack, Sam, I was just about to… find… you?"

The General and Colonel quickly pulled away as they heard the familiar archeologist's voice.

"Daniel!" Sam, slightly breathless, stepped back. "I uh… we were…"

Daniel stared at them, wide-eyed.

"It's not what you think!" Jack said awkwardly. "Really. For Thor…"

"Sure…" Daniel said skeptically before turning away to let them continue their 'it's not what you think' business.

"Well," Thor said, slightly taken aback but happy at his success, "I hope you both have a Merry Christmas." He beamed himself away, leaving two embarrassed people standing in a floor of mistletoe…

"Ah, what the hell?" He leaned over and kissed her again.

The End.


Okay, so, the ending was kinda… dumb, but! Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it!

This is dedicated to my Dad, who came up with all those silly songs that I have grown to love! Thanks Dad!

Please review!