Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or MasterCard, or the MasterCard commercial sequence. Me no own, you no sue!
Much love to everyone- enjoy!

MasterCard Commercial Parody

The blonde teen smiled at the camera, his whiskered cheeks spread wide in a smile.

"Ramen for a week: $10." He happily indicated a rather large pile of Instant Ramen: Chicken Flavor behind him. The stack of bright plastic packages towered over the slender blonde boy.

A dark figure emerged from behind the stack of noodles. He stared disinterestedly into the camera, hands in his pockets. Behind him, a large pile of what seemed to be various boxes in pink, red, and white stood proudly. This pile was many times bigger than the one behind the blonde.

It was like compairing a moutain to a molehill. Well, more like a moutain to a pimple on the side of your nose.

Fangirls squealed.

The dark-haired boy would have rolled his eyes, but Uchiha's do not do such things.

"Seventeen years worth of my Valentines Day Chocolate: $4 million."

The blonde glared at the newcomer, sticking out his tongue. The dark-haired boy smirked, and the blonde would have jumped on the other if the producer hadn't cleared her throat rather loudly.

"Oh, fine! A new set of orange clothes..." The blonde casually strolled over to the next area of the set. The camerawoman- who also happened to be the director- followed his every movement with her camera.

The blonde stopped in front of rows upon rows of orange suits, just like the one he wore now.


The camerawoman panned quickly over to Sasuke, who was walking in front of what appeared to be a large clothing and weapons store.

"The net worth of ItachiMustDie! Outfitters and Amoury: $6 billion."

Coal-black eyes flicked over to the blonde, noticing the adorable pout the other had. The pale complexioned one smirked, enjoying his victory.

A silent message passed between the two on set- not in the script, the screenwriter noted, as she panned her camera so she could catch all the action.

'Ah, screw the script. This is juicer!'

The audience held their breath as the two rivals approached one another.

"Having a bastard as your boyfriend..." The blonde said, reaching his arms up behind the others neck.

"Getting a kiss from the one who means the most to you..." the dark-haired one said, wrapping his arms casually around the blonde's slim waste.

Some girls- at this point- were bleeding slightly from the nose. Especially the set director, but she had to hold the camera steady- dropping the only camera would ruin her commercial.

"Priceless." The two said in unison, their lips meeting chastely.

At this point, a few girls squealed and several had to be taken to the hospital for emergency blood transfusions.

"There are some things money can't buy. For everything else..." the black-haired one said, pulling away from the kiss.

"... there's BastardCard!" The blonde grinned, pulling out a card from his pocket and showing the audience and lone camerawoman.

On the card was an adorable little picture of the only person the blonde affectionately called 'bastard'.

"Cut! That's a wrap!" The camerawoman said, switching off her machine. Naruto grinned.

"I always wanted to be in a commercial!" he said. He probably would have been bouncing all over the room of the studio of his much-lusted after boyfriend hadn't been holding him.

"You can't act, dobe." Sasuke said, a smirk tugging at his lips. Blue orbs glared sulkily at the dark-eyed prince.

"I can too! I did way better than you, teme!"

"I'm sure." the Uchiha replied sarcastically.

Naruto opened his mouth to retort, but Sasuke used the only effective method of shutting the blonde up.

Occupy his mouth.

For years afterwards, the director, camerawoman, screenwriter, and set director would have wished that she had kept her camera on, so she could see what she had missed after passing out from blood loss.

AN: I was bored- and this happened. I was just thinking random thoughts (fun!) and I realized that MasterCard kinda rhymed with BastardCard... not really, but very, very slightly. I thought back upon some of their commercials... and decided to throw in some yaoi since I am a die-hard fan.

Was meant to be random, slightly funny, and fluffy. Hope it worked! (Review? Pweez? I'll give you cookies! ... or more SasuNaru. You pick!)