Ok, so I was really bored and I just decided to do this after being inspired after I read a collection of stories about werewolves... I know, pretty odd, right? I think I'm going to add Sango's Story next, so stay tuned! Oh, and Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha... As much as I'd like to dream... This story is only so that I can make fun of the characters, okay?
Kagome grinned as she got up in the morning. Today was her 16th birthday! Getting up from her bed, she quickly got dressed and went downstairs. As she had expected, her family was downstairs with a huge birthday cake with sixteen candles on it. Overjoyed, Kagome said, "Oh, you guys are too much! Thank you!" She quickly hugged her mom, "But I have to go to down the well today," Seeing how their faces fell, she quickly added, "But I'll only be gone for a couple of hours! I'll be back soon so that we can celebrate!"
Kagome's mom tried to give her a smile, but it turned out to be fake, "Ok, I understand, but hurry back!"
Relieved, Kagome kissed her grandpa on the cheek and quickly made her way out. There was a feeling of guilt in the pit of her stomach, but she ignored it and jumped into the well. When she climbed out, she found everyone waiting for her, Miroku hiding something behind his back with a smile. "Hey, everyone!" she said.
"Happy Birthday!" They chanted back at her.
"Hey, since you're turning sixteen," Miroku said, pulling a huge bottle of sake out from behind his back, "Take sixteen shots!"
Kagome thought about it. Uh oh, this can't be good… Her conscious told her, but another part of her argued back Hey, I'm only sixteen once my life; I might as well enjoy it! "Alright," She agreed, taking the cup from Miroku's hand and drowning the strong alcohol. Her eyes brightened. She had never known that this stuff tasted so good!
An hour later, Kagome held her last shot dizzily in her wobbling hand and drank it, not noticing as bits of it dribbled down her chin. She pushed the sake away and sat down, trying to rest her spinning head. Suddenly, she said, "Hey, do you know what are weird?"
Inuyasha glanced warily at her, "What?"
"Butt cracks," She said, scratching her chin. They all stared at her in surprise. "I mean they're like cracks on your butt! Isn't that ironic? I have a butt crack, do you Inuyasha?"
The hanyou nervously looked away, "Um, I think that you've had too much alcohol today… Maybe you should go home and get some rest."
Kagome's eyes turned dark, "Are you calling me fat?" She demanded, her hands on her hips. She tried to stand up, but nearly fell over and had to be caught by Inuyasha. She slapped his hands off her.
"No, of course not! You're not fat!"
Tears formed in Kagome's eyes, "You do think I'm fat!!!" She sobbed, her mouth quivering.
"I didn't say that!" Inuyasha was getting very panicky now.
"Do you know how hard it is to be a woman these days? Well, it's very hard!" Kagome watched as Inuyasha and Sango exchanged nervous glances, "Oh, I see what's going on! You're leaving me for Sango!" She cried, "You think she's skinnier!!!"
"Of course she isn't!" Inuyasha said, trying to cheer her up. Sango's eyes hardened as she glared at him, "I mean she is… I mean she isn't… I mean…"
Kagome bit her lip, "Inuyasha, sam!" She realized that that wasn't the right word, "Oh, what was that darned word again? Lie down! Heel! Roll over!!!"
Inuyasha flinched at her words, but sighed when he realized that she couldn't remember the word.
"Aha! SIT!!!" She yelled, making him slam hard into the ground, "I hate you! You are so mean and you were cheating with Sango this whole time! I can't believe you! SIT!!!"
"Kagome!" Inuyasha said in a begging tone, "I didn't cheat! I swear!"
Kagome's face cleared up from the angry expression that was once on it, "Aw, I know you didn't. You're so cute with your little doggy ears!" She exclaimed, rubbing one of his ears, "You're so cute! Oh, yes you are! Yes you are!"
"Um, Kagome?" Sango asked, warily.
Kagome's eyes brightened at the sight of her, "Are you… Are you Santa Claus?" She asked, her mouth hanging open slightly in awe.
Sango blinked, "Who's Santa Claus?" she asked, frowning.
"Yay, you are!!!" Excited, Kagome sat in her lap and said, "I've been very good this year, Santa! So for Christmas, I would like a flamethrower, three laser guns, two whips, a chain saw, and an abominable snowman, ok? Oh, and maybe one of those cute big swords like Inuyasha and Bankotsu have!"
Sango quickly pushed the drunk Kagome off her lap, "That's it! You're drunk and you're going home!" She announced, picking up the girl who was now super fascinated with a blade of grass on the ground.
Kagome picked up the piece of grass and held it high in the sky, "Wow, you're so pretty, Mr. Greenikins!" She said, snuggling it to her. Then she looked around to see all the grass, "Oh, Mr. Greenikins, you have friends!" She said, delightedly started trying to yank out all of the grass on the ground.
Raising an eyebrow at her friend's crazy antics, Sango pushed Kagome in the well, "Sorry, but this is for your own good…"
And so they all learned an important lesson that day: Never let Kagome touch the sake!
Ok, I know, that was a little dumb, but I was REALLY bored! Almost bored to tears, so tell me how that was!