By WTFWonder

Summary: "Huh, I guess this makes me a sadist, a sociopath AND a narcissist."


inordinate fascination with oneself, excessive self-love; vanity

Psychoanalysis. erotic gratification derived from admiration of one's own physical or mental attributes

Dark Phantom twisted his neck around 180 degrees, getting the last few kinks out of his throat. Being crammed inside that damned Fenton thermos had wreaked havoc on his usually flexible joints. He smirked down at the unmoving Master of Time. The puddles of green ectoplasm were starting to link to each other to form one large pool around the hooded ghost.

To the sociopath's astonishment, his true form had in fact been the young adult, and not the old man visage as he'd guessed. Who knew? Dark Phantom smirked at the now double dead specter and nudged him with the tip of his white boot. "Personally I'm a little disappointed Clockwork; weren't you supposed to know everything? I guess just because you're omnipresent doesn't mean you don't forget a few things, hm?" Clockwork didn't answer. "I thought so."

For a moment the mass murdering ghost pondered whether or not killing the being that maintained the proper order of the time stream and a large amount of the existence of reality had been a bad thing. For all he knew the entire multiverse or whatever-it-was they all existed in would collapse in on itself due to something the Master of Time was supposed to fix not getting repaired. Oh well, the end of existence means I did my job right. Dark Phantom mused with nonchalance.

He did one final cat stretch to wake up his back and shoulder muscles, thanking Satan that he'd finally broken out of the ridiculous anti-ghost soup container after months of toil. The monster had always had a stubborn streak, even as a pathetic human. Speaking of which… "Let's just see what my better half is up to." He strode leisurely over to the viewing portal and, lucky him, there was young Danny Fenton, sleeping soundly in bed in the middle of the night.

Dark Phantom grinned inhumanly wide, his fangs gleaming viciously in the dim lighting of Clockwork's lair. "This is too easy." With that he flew into the portal to be deposited not three feet above his humane younger self. Their ghost senses went off simultaneously, but Danny's went unnoticed, merely pulling his covers tighter around his small shoulders.

Yes, small. Small. Fragile. Weak. Naïve. Innocent. Pure. It disgusted the sinister ghost that he'd once been the poster child for such adjectives—damn it, if anyone else were to hear such a description they'd think he was describing a girl! He glared with blood drop irises at the boy he used to be; this thin, gangly young man that was so full of hope, bravery, light and goodness. It made Dark Phantom want to gag.

But that's easily fixed., he thought as his right fist glowed ectoplasmic green. One quick blast and his weakness would be gone…just like that. No. No, that's too quick. He wouldn't suffer at all. Perhaps one last battle—going down fighting and all that would fit mini me. But then that would give Danny the satisfaction of knowing he'd done all he could, that he'd been strong to the very end, that he had been and always would be a hero, blah, blah, blah. In short, he would die knowing that he'd morally beaten Dark Phantom.

The energy blast died away as Dark Phantom sighed and raked a black clad hand through his fiery mane. Sometimes being a sadist wasn't easy. What was the point in killing his alternate past half if he (Danny) could still find solace in something? Dark Phantom raised a brow as the oblivious teen turned in his sleep, still not aware of the evil apparition's presence. Good.

I want that fear again. I want that look in my human half's eyes again. Yes, that look of all consuming terror in his own big, glassy blue eyes had been utterly beautiful when he'd been reborn. He'd roared and hissed and cackled maniacally in his weak side's face, horror seeping out of every pore with his sweat. He'd been mildly aware that Vlad Masters was huddled in a corner, his forearms crossed over the top of his head, with his face buried in his knees—waiting for his turn. Waiting to go out with his "son." (That had in fact been the only reason he'd spared the fruitloop at all.)

To this day/night Dark Phantom had never really understood what he'd done just before slaughtering his human half like a pig. He had wrapped his bony hand around Danny Fenton's throat, slammed him against the wall and kissed his human double hard with his reptilian tongue down the mortal's throat. From what he could tell, Fenton had been infinitely more shocked by the French kiss than the ghost, and said ghost was flat out confused.

This moment was quickly passed by as he proceeded to gut his flesh and blood weakness like a fish. Somehow, even now it seemed, he regretted killing the other half as much as he loathed it/him. Before we continue let him make these two things perfectly clear: Dark Phantom knew that he was not, is not, and never will be homosexual. Dark Phantom also knew that his past self (Danny Fenton/Phantom) was not, is not and never will be two separate entities.

Dark Phantom's memories of his teenage life were hated but clear: his hormones had made it blatantly obvious that he was 100 percent heterosexual. First came his lustful crush on Miss Paulina Sanchez, the little... The sociopath rather enjoyed his memory of painting buildings with the Latina's blood, by that time a hollow, used up mannequin who'd passed herself around after giving up on her "Ghost Boy." Then came his slowly developing romance with Valerie Gray (Never did kill her. But, eh, she was good entertainment). His past self had just started awakening feelings for Samantha Manson when the explosion happened. So yes, he knew he was straight.

As for the whole Danny Fenton versus Danny Phantom thing…was Peter Parker in love with Spiderman? Did Bruce Wayne have a crush on Batman? No, because they are the same person, so to speak.

But it still begged the question Dark Phantom had never been able to answer: why the kiss? In any case it couldn't be "love" as he was devoid of any and all human emotion. He was a sadistic, sociopathic bastard; a fact that he was all too proud of. He could (and did) maim, torture, destroy, and overall do whatever he damn well pleased because he could and wanted to do it. For the past ten years of his existence he'd cared only for himself, not caring who he had to kill or torment to gain his own pleasure.

Sometimes he truly wished his human half could have witnessed all the hell "he" had risen, just to feel the guilt, remorse and complete agony it would bring. Dark Phantom wanted to prove to his weakness just how weak he was, to show Danny that he was superior, stronger, and in all honesty happier than he ever would have been as the noble, goody-two-shoes superhero. But killing his human half had robbed him of the chance to prove it, to maliciously drag out Danny's torment, fear, and degradation.

Dark Phantom gripped his goateed chin as he furrowed his brow in concentration. The more he thought about it, the more he began to understand the kiss. Maybe, just maybe it had been an act of…passion? The murder was likely just a bi-product of his bloodlust coming to the surface, the need to kill whatever was closest, and too bad for his human half, he had been the candidate. If his newly fused mind hadn't been deadset (ha ha) on slaughter at the time, would he have done something…else to his human half?

Something far more branding and possessive than mere death, definitely.

But something of that nature was bordering on narcissistic…something like Plasmius. Dark Phantom couldn't help but smirk at the very probable image of Vlad making out with himself. If there was a nominee for "most in love with themselves", the cheesehead would have won hands down. And that's when it clicked.

He was infused with Vlad Plasmius, was he not? The man had been obsessed with himself in more ways than Dark Phantom could count and it only made sense that a good dose of his narcissism had been forcefed into the monster's psyche. This accompanied with his sadism and sociopathy had cultured a sort of self-love, or "self-want" if you wanted to be technical.

In some twisted, psychological way it made sense now. Dark Phantom gaped in pure shock at his (no longer) past, younger self still blissfully unaware of the evil ghost, sleeping like a baby. The red-eyed specter gawked openly down at himself and then back at his smaller (almost pretty?) counterpart. Dark Phantom's shock faded as he began to lower himself towards the slumbering Danny. Satan below, this…this was a physical form of vanity wasn't it?

Dark Phantom chuckled aloud and mused, "Huh, I guess this makes me a sadist, a sociopath AND a narcissist." His rolling baritone almost awoke the clueless teen, murmuring something about "Mmn, Sam..?", smiling as he did so. Dark Phantom grinned and thought, Nowhere close, Danny boy. The hellion's eyes blazed with glee as Danny actually puckered his still-smiling lips for the nonexistent Goth girl to kiss.

Now was as good a time as any to see if his little theory was true. His black and white cape fluttered down to rest on the bed sheets as he brought his death blue face down to the halfa's. Their lips met. Yep, I am definitely a narcissist. Danny (annoyingly) was keeping his lips closed, keeping the imaginary kiss sweet and chaste. Dark Phantom did not care for "sweet and chaste."

The 24 year old felt an overwhelming sense of déjà vu as he shot his snakelike tongue into the young man's mouth, the prongs rubbing against the ridges of the wet cave. His dark-rimmed eyes shut in bliss as the frail boy writhed under him in growing discomfort. Danny finally opened his feminine crystal eyes (it still amazed the ghost that he'd gone from looking so effeminate as a teen to such a demonic and masculine appearance) to stare in absolute horror at just who/what was kissing him; Dark Phantom's orbs opening as well.

Danny Fenton all but shrieked into Dark Phantom's smirking lips. "Gehn ghs!" he mumbled. The familiar rings of white formed at the boy's waist, but in a flash Dark Phantom had the teenager's wrists in two painful grips, electric jolts rushing through the boy's body. "MMMMNN!" he wailed into his former future self's mouth, the transformation negating.

Dark Phantom laughed in his head as he ceased levitating and dropped with a heavy thump onto his former self, enjoying the choked heave the human gave into his mouth. Danny squirmed and writhed under the black and white clad form that was happily crushing and Frenching the air out of him. Dark Phantom waited until the hero was almost as blue as he was before he removed his tongue from the teen's throat and slightly lifted himself off the narrow chest.

The full ghost grinned as the boy gasped for air before turning panicked blue eyes on him. Yes, there's the look I missed.

This is the most screwed up fanfiction I've ever made, with the most screwed up DP pairing I've ever heard of. But I just adore it for some reason. Narcissism has never been so right… Ahem. Well, please review (I now take anonymous reviews so you have no excuse not to) and let me know whether or not I should continue this or leave it a oneshot.

P.S.: I call him Dark Phantom because Dark Danny sounds corny to me (sorry Butch Hartman), Dan Phantom seems too close to Danny Phantom, and Phantom is the same name as Danny Phantom's ghost half. Since evil future Danny is just two ghost sides and pure evil I decided Dark Phantom worked best.