HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!! Here's your gift! A FanFiction about me and my fellow friends.These authors are all my friends from real life and have allowed me to use them in this story. GET READY TO LAUGH YOUR HEADS OFF!
Something really dumb!
It all began as Itachi was walking down the street back to the Uchiha manor….when suddenly…..
A giant beam of light shown into view revealing a young woman. The only words that Itatchi spoke out was, "What the?"
"Uchiha Itachi!" The girl cired, "I am the Mage of Souls! (yes! The author is the master!)"
"I have teleported myself through time and dimensions to stop you from killing your family! If you kill your family and your whole clan, your brother and yourself will be the only two left. And then your brother will become a total emo! Nobody likes an emo….except those crazy chicks in this manga but who cares about them!?"
Another giant beam of light takes the scene and another girl appears.
"Uchiha Itachi," the new girl cried, "I have teleported myself through time and dimensions to…"
"What the?! Murasaki Hikari?!"
The new girl moved her head to MoS. "Oh hey! Whats up Mage Of Souls?"
"What are you doing here? Im already telling Itachi not to kill his clan so you can just go back now."
"Huh? That's not why Im here at all."
"Im here to tell Itachi he SHOULD kill off his clan!"
"Because, without him killing off his clan, Sauske would be a happy person and non emo."
"…..so…..you like emos then?"
"What? Hell no! But tons of fanfic writers do! And without the Sauske emoness, how can we make Naruto Yaoi, we could use Neji or Garra but they aren't as cool as Sauske."
"Damn! That's right!" Mage of Souls agreed, "The only Yaoi fics I read mostly involve Sauske with Naruto…..or Iruka with Kakashi."
"And doesn't sauskes pissed of ways make you love naruto more?"
"OMG! Your right!"
"See? And don't forget the Itachi and Naruto fanfics."
"Huh?!" Itachi almost choked.
"Oh don't worry," MoS assured, "Its only one sided."
"Mostly you just trying to rape him." MH said under her breath.
"SO I guess we should let Itachi kill his caln then….well Itachi, go ahead and slaughter your family and clan."
MH and MoS turned to see ANOTHER beam of light revealing ANOTHER girl.
"DEMONIC AURAS?!" They both cry at the same time.
"Uchiha Itachi," DA began, "Im Demonic Auras! I have teleported myself through time and dimensions to stop you from killing your family."
The two other girls were confused by this, "HUH?!"
"But DA!" Mage cried, "If he doesn't kill his clan, what about all those Naruto Sauske fics they'll disappear."
"Henceforth brining in MORE HINATA NARUTO FICS!"
Both Hikari and Mage gasped.
"SHES RIGHT!" Hikari cried, "Whats even better than Naruto Yaoi is Hinata fics! The girl who always had a thing for the boy finally gets what she always wanted."
Mage nodded in approval, "Of course they may also be some more Sakura fics…."
"Hell no!" Demonic assures, "She'll finally get Sauske."
Suddenly….angels rejoiced over their heads and the three girls danced happily sining merry songs of happier times on the horizon…..while an extremely confused Itachi watched.
"Umm…..can I go home now?" He asked.
The three girls suddenly realized what they were doing and went into a group huddle discussing all that was said and done.
"Alright Itachi," Demonic announced, "We came up with the solution. You are NOT to kill your family."
A beam of light flew from the sky and dissipated…..ther was no one…..
"That was stupid." Hikari announced, "I would have thought that it would have been…"
Someone landed on the ground from a tree.
"Oh….there she is…."
The mysterious girl sat back up and cried out, "Hi guys!"
"TK Productions," they all cry out, "What are you doing here?! Are you here to Talk to itachi too?!"
TKP turns to itachi and then moves to the direction of her friends, "Nah! I just wanted to party with you guys!"
"Cool….so you traveled through Time and dimensions too?" Demonic asked.
"Me? Well actually I found a giant worm hole in the whole dimensional portal thingy. You guys forgot to shut it on your way out!"
"Uhhh…..did you shut it?" Mage asked.
"What do I look like? I'm no house maid bitch! So, who's this guy?"
"Uchiha Itachi." The three explain.
"OH! HIM! Have you guys asked him the QUESTION yet?"
Everyone suddenly gasps.
"We almost forgot!" Hikari immdeatley walked up to the ninja and asked, "So….if you were in battle with a pirate….who would win?"
"WHY?" They all ask.
"Because Im trained in stealth and accuracy."
They all nodd in agreement.
"But what if the pirate had a gun?" Mage asked.
"Or what if there were a whole bunch of them?" Demonic asked, "I mean, you guys travel in packs of one and three while pirates go all out with fourty or sixty."
"How about the terrain?" TKP asked, "You guys are tough on land but could you fight in a ship filled with an assload of pirates!?"
"What if the pirates were all zombie pirates. Like in pirates of the carribean!" Hikari cries out.
"Or what if you were fighting Jack Sparrow could you beat him?" TKP asked, "And if for some turn of events, this Jack sparrow was cloned and we now had over thirty of them to fight you. Could you win?"
"That's it!" Itachi cried out as he pulled out his katana, "Im sick of hearing you crazy nutjobs! You've driven me up to here! Luckily Im a ninja. Im trained to kill people like you."
"Aw damn!" Mage said, "I forgot about the whole killing thing."
"RAUGGGGHHHH!" Itachi charges at the girls who immdeiatley take action.
"Quick! We must use our super awesome author powers!" TKP cried.
"We have author powers?!" Demonic asked. "That sounds really cheesy."
"Just use them!"
They used their author powers to majically make a plothole which the fell through and landed on a table in an Uchiha household.
"That made no sense whatsoever." Mage exclaimed, "I mean, why did we just fall onto a table when we clearly fell from a hole in the ground?"
"Plot Hole!" Demonic reminded her.
"THERE YOU ARE!" Itachi hollered as he entered the house and flailed his katana everywhere, killing many bystanders and witnesses.
"He gets really Pissy doesn't he!" TKP cries out as she dodges some shuriken wich land in some guys face.
"This is better than the movies!" Hiakari cried squeals.
"ILL KILL YOU ALL!" Itachi began to pave his way through every house destroying everyliving soul in hopes of finding the odd girls. "GODDAMMIT!"
The girls immediately rushed as far as they could and suddenly found themselves trapped by a wall. Itachi slowly made his way over and gave an evil chuckle…
"heheheh….its a DEAD end for you four!"
With quick thinking TKP does a few hand seals and uses her SUMMONING JUTSU!
"What?! How….how could you know such a powerful technique?!"
"Because I'm awesome!" TKP announced.
The smoke suddenly cleared to reveal her summoning to be….Captain jack sparrow!
"WOW!" The other three cried out as the clapped in approval.
"Now to finally see what would happen IF A PIRATE VERSED A NINJA!" TKP cried out sending gasps from the other girls.
Itachi stood there, "……you're kidding right?"
"Now Jack! ATTACK WITH ALL YOUR POWAH!"
The pirate immediately pulled out his sword all Jack Sparrow like and immediately went for a killing strike. Even the Pirates of the Caribbean sound track played loudly for him as he….
"DUDE! DA, where'd you get that?!" MoS asked noticing she had a CD player in her hand playing the CD.
DA just gave a grin, "I don't know……really I don't."
Jack Sparrow made a huge battle cry as his sword came crashing down at Itachi just before….
Itachi immediately slashed Jack making him puff away in a puff of smoke.
The four girls looked at where their summoned hero onece was then locked eyes with their foe…who was giving an evil look to his eyes.
"Im going to enjoy this."
MoS franticly began to think of something that they could use. Anything would do. An attack, something from his past, a distraction perhaps. Finally, thinking it up, she pointedc her finger to an ally and cried out, "LOOK! A sale on EMO stuff!"
"WHERE?!" Itachi cried out turning his back towards the girls who couldn't help but to say "Yoink!" before they rushed into the last standing Uchiha house.
"Oooookeeeeay," MH panted, "We have to open the gate through blah blah blah to get back home."
"But we used up our energy running away from that nut job!" TKP gasped. "What can we do?!"
Suddenly someone opened the back door revealing two people. Everyone just stood there staring at eachother.
"………" MH said nothing.
"………" MoS said nothing.
"………" TKP said nothing.
"………" DA said nothing.
"………What are you doing in our house?" Asked the man.
"And why are you covered in blood?" Asked the woman.
Everyone went back into silence.
"uuuuuuuuh…..christmas miracle?" DA suggested.
"I GOT YOU NOW!" The voice of Itachi cried as he barged his way through swining his katana everywhere stabbing his parents in the process.
"DUDE! You just killed your parents!" MoS pointed out.
Itachi turned to see the corpses of his parents and just froze there. Everything remained quiet for a moment as MH found the door and motioned everyone to leave. Rushing down the hallways in a quick fashion, they almost didn't notice the young boy gawking at all the distruction.
"Holy Milk Muffins!" MH gasped, "Its little Sauske! Dang! This must be when he became traumatized."
"Awwwww…..KODAK MOMENT!" TKP cried taking a picture with her camera while everyone grabbed her.
The boy immediately looked at them with a confused look. The girls just stood there looking at him till DA took over.
"Gaaaaaack!" She cried as she fell to the floor, "Im dead!"
The others looked at her for a quick second and followed her lead.
"RRRGHK!" MoS wheezed, "Im too young!"
"Hrrrrrrrrrk!" MH spluttered, "Goodbye Cruel world!!!!"
"HRRRROFFF!" TKP horphed, "Its getting dark!"
They all sprawled out on the ground taking corpsey poses with their mouths open.
"OH MY GOD!" Sauske cried out.
DA held up her shaking hand and announced in a weak voice, "D-don't forget childIdontknowisSauske… all this killing had nothing to do with four girls messing up the time line…the killer is actually at your house……"
"H-How did you?"
"GACK! Im dead!" DA Immediatley said and said no more.
The boy, having no clue, took DA's words and headed toward his house. Once out of sight, the girls stood back up.
"Well," MoS said dusting herself off, "That was fun."
"Should we feel guilty about what had happened?" TKP asked, "We kinda made Itachi kill everyone.
"No one know that! If anyone asks…Itachi was just too Emo…or a wizard did it."
"A wizard did it!" The group repeated as they rushed out of the village, never to be seen from again.
The end! Please r&r!