The God Killer
x by Ebony x
The city lights looked the same no matter what country you were in, Mello decided. No matter the distance you traveled, things never got that different at all. The lights were still cold and isolated as the flashed in the distance outlined by his bedroom window, so bright he couldn't see the stars beyond them. The people (strangers) in the city below were still ignorant and smiling (he hated them for it, how they laughed and loved and complained about how lonely they were). Chocolate was still sweet. His apartment was still empty. Near was still the tiniest bit better than him.
L was still dead.
There was no silence, no white noise to comfort him. Someone in the apartment below him was playing a piano, badly, and in the apartment to his right, two someones were making love without moderation. He kept breathing, staring at the wall with his sore eyes wide open. If he opened his mouth to speak, no one would hear and no one would know.
Mello was sinking and he knew it. But he wasn't done yet, not quite.
You've still got to get revenge on him, he reminded himself. He was going to kill a false god (Kira, Light Yagami, the fake L, that bastard) no matter how much of himself he had to destroy to do it. It was one of the only kind of thoughts he let into his head, and it festered there. Mello wondered endlessly about him – what he looked like, talked like, what he ate, everything! This man was a stranger, but in truth, his cold and distant existence was all the reason Mello had to live some days (living was fighting, those days. Living was just not dying).
A half-hour before day broke wetly on the horizon, he finally slipped into sleep. His rosary was clutched in his hands, and his mind was filled with thoughts of the false god that was his reason for waking up later, and he was alive, even if he didn't feel it.