"They are not." Sakura hissed at her teacher.
"Yes they are." Kakashi almost sang happily.
"Naruto is not in a sexual relationship with Sasuke."
"Why do you even think that anyway?!" She growled, and Kakashi shook his head at the naivety of her.
"Look, listen to their conversation. If they weren't having sex, there's no way Sasuke would put up with him."
Nevertheless, the two snuck up on the two boys, and Sakura watched as Naruto stared into space and Sasuke read a book. Sasuke was very intellectual. Then, she watched as Naruto began to speak.
"Seriously, this last week has been proper shitty."
"I mean, what with the whole 'you burnt down another village' and the whole banning from all local retailers because of one little shuriken incident. I mean, it's really sucked."
"You know, we should like pretend this last week didn't exist. We should like, erase it."
"Can we do that?"
"We're ninjas. We could like, burn calendars and stuff."
"Wouldn't that erase the whole year?"
"Oh yeah…okay, so we cut out the last week from the calendar then burn them in a bonfire. Then, we can walk around in a kinda bubble."
"'Cept not like the boy in the bubble, not like we have a disease or somethin', like a metaphorical bubble."
"Yeah, like a bubble of bliss. Bliss is ignorance….so, we're walking round in these bliss-bubbles-"
"Oh yeah, so we're walking round in these metaphorical bliss-bubbles; how awesome would that be?"
"Exactly. Sasuke, do you have a calendar?"
"How do you know what day it is then?"
"It's one later than the day before."
"But how do you know what the day before was? …it doesn't matter, I have one anyway. We could start with that one, then move onto the rest of the villagers."
"Won't everyone be annoyed that you've erased the last week?"
"I'm sure if we explain it to them they wouldn't mind."
"……………………..hey, Sasuke? You know, if you're not a simpleton, are you a complexton? Oh…wait, that's like, complexion…that doesn't make sense, what kinda idiot made a word where the opposite is another word for skin tone?"
"Oh my god…" Sakura gasped, staring. "They must be having sex. There's no other explanation."
Kakashi nodded solemnly.