The Perfect Match
Mewtwo: You will understand in time. But we must move quickly to the Gorge or you will face a problem most horrible...
(Entire town gasps in horror)
Marge: Oh dear! What's going to happen? Your people aren't going to enslave us, are they??
Burns: Good grief woman, does that thing look like it could enslave anything? (pointing at Maggie's Togepi)
Togepi: Toki toki toki!
Mewtwo: We are not going to enslave you. Pokemon do no such thing. Not even myself.
Marge: Then what?
Mewtwo: Just wait until we get to the Gorge.
(The entire town of Springfield marches to Springfield Gorge, where the ball of energy remains. Bart and Lisa are there talking to a frantic Professor Frink)
Frink (to Bart and Lisa): But we must! Imagine what would happen if we didn't! It would be complete anarchy and chaos, with the shocking and the flmaing and the poisoning and the fighting- unhygh!
Lisa: I suppose he's right...
Bart: No way man. There's not a chance in hell I'm letting Haunter go. He's a troublemaker's dream come true!
Frink: We have no choice young man!
Homer (waking up suddenly in Snorlax's hand and speaking in a sleepy slurred voice): You tell 'im Frinkie. Giv 'im no choice.
Marge: Go back to sleep Homer.
Homer (whinning): I caaaan't. I'm hungryyyyyyyy. (Snorlax rumbles in agreement)
Marge: Oh for crying out loud... (Mr. Mime shakes his head, not wanting to cook anymore for Homer or his equally voracious Snorlax)
Burns: Enough of this hobnoblery! What are you oafish clouts arguing about?
Frink: I'm simply saying that, er ah, we must place all of our creatures-
Mewtwo (shaking his head at this idiocy): No. I mean we call ourselves Pokemon.
Bart: Pokemon? What kind of a crappy name is that? (Haunter starts crying in that crazy anime style) Okay, okay, I'm sorry! It's a great name. (Haunter stops crying and licks Bart happily) EWWW! (Bart wipes face frantically)
Lisa: Why are you called Pokemon anyway?
Mewtwo: It's a shortened form for 'Pocket Monsters'
Marge: Right. Monsters. Let's forget about the name thing. Why are we all at the Gorge?
Mewtwo: It's quite simple. We Pokemon must travel back through the warp gate soon, or else we will be stuck in your world forever.
Frink: That's what I was trying to say Mrs. Simpson. But your son here is, um er ah, quite adamant in his proposition to keep his cre- I mean, Pokemon.
Bart: Why would you get stuck in this world anyways? And is it really so bad?
Mewtwo: The explanation is simple. In our world people are used to Pokemon. But here, I'm sure scientists (gives Frink a hard stare, to which Frink cowers on the ground) will want to study us and do all sorts of inhumane tests. The world will find out about us within hours and we will be forced into solitary confinment I'm sure.
Lisa: Bart, you have to face the facts. If you keep Haunter with you, one day the FBI will be on our doorstep with their own version of the Ghostbusters ready to take you and Haunter down. And I'd rather not see Rapidash turned into Rapid Dry Glue.
Bart: I guess you're all right. Man, this stinks worse than Milhouse's lucky Rainbow Brite underwear.
Milhouse (next to his Paras): Heyyyy! You promised not to tell!
(Sherri and Terri along with Bellossom and Vileplume giggle and point at Milhouse and Paras, who both turn a deep shade of red... especially Paras)
Frink: I have one question for the talking cat.
Mewtwo (growling menacingly): My name is Mewtwo!
Frink: Sorry! Please don't hurt me! I was just wondering... what specific form of, ur um, quantum particle or spacetime phenomenom opened this warp gate?
Mewtwo: I'm not sure. (shouts to crowd) Pokemon! Was anyone near or inside the facilities where the scientists were performing the experiments that caused this?
(A very loud meow comes from the depths of the crowd and the owner of the Pokemon steps out. It's none other than-)
Lisa and Bart: Aaahh! Sideshow Bob!
Sideshow Bob: Hello everyone. (chillingly) Hello Bart.
Bart (gulping): Hiya.
Bob: As much as I'd love to sit and chat with my little nemesis, we have other matters at hand. Mewtwo, what does my Persian say?
Mewtwo (listens to the Persian for a few minutes and then shakes his head sadly): How typical. I should have expected those no-brained fools.
Lisa (sliding off Rapidash and standing at her side): What happened?
Mewtwo: Well, I will make a long story short. There is an evil organization in our world called Team Rocket. Aparently their scientists were doing some experiements on teleportation when there was an accident. This particular trio of bumbling agents for Team Rocket, consisting of two humans and a Meowth, stumbled into the control room by mistake and spilled soy sauce on the generator.
Bart: Kinda sounds like Homer at work.
Homer: You just wait boy. You're going to get the punishment of a lifetime! The punishment gods will grin at your misfortune and the sentence will fall heavily on your shoulders!!
Mewtwo: Whatever the case, we must leave. This world will not fare well with the presence of sentient animals with supernatural powers. I suggest everyone say goodbye to their Pokemon... (People start talking to their Pokemon)
Bart (sadly): Guess this is goodbye buddy. (Tries to hug Haunter but the ghost is laughing because he made himself transparent. Bart laughs) A trouble maker till the end huh? Well, don't forget to scare a few of those funny fighting Pokemon for me in your world.
Haunter (nodding): Haunter!
(Lisa pats her Rapidash and says goodbye. Marge shakes hands with Mr. Mime. Homer rubs Snorlax's belly for good luck and Snorlax does the same to Homer's head. Maggie and Togepi hug each other.)
Mewtwo: Quickly! Everyone into the warp!
(Snorlax lumbers up to the gate and squeezes through it. Rapidash leaps in with Togepi on it's back. Haunter flies in with Mr. Mime at his heels. More and more Pokemon pour through until the only Mewtwo, an Alakazam an Espeon and a Hypno stand there)
Mewtwo: Before we leave we must do something... (The four Pokemon use their psychic powers to hypnotize the entire crowd. As everyone stands there in a blank daze the four remaining Pokemon run through the warp. The energy ball suddenly disappears and everyone jumps out of the trance)
Lisa: What are we all doing here?
Marge (surprised): I... don't know.
Homer: Maybe we came for the annual Springfield Gorge Barbeque. Mmmm... barbeque.
Bart: Dad, there is no annual Springfield Gorge Barbeque.
Frink: I feel like something monumental just happened. But I can't remember.
Burns (holds something up): Maybe it has something to do with these confounded little red and white balls we're all holding.
Homer: Maybe you're right Burns. Maybe you're right...
(A whinny voice in the distance shouts "Mrs. Hoover, I got my little red and white ball stuck up my nose.")