He was safe, he was finally safe. The very thought filled his heart with happiness and glee. He was safe here, behind the high walls of Ba Sing Se; no one would hurt him, or his cabbages.

He had painstakingly rebuilt his cart, and quickly restocked his cabbages. He carefully turned them over in his hands. He arranged them on his cart as artfully as he could. He wanted every dewy green leaf to be displayed in it's perfection. He stepped back to survey his work. It was magnificent. No one would be able to resist these cabbages.

Suddenly, he heard a deep, distant rumbling, a sound that he was all-too familiar with. A sound that heralded doom to all of cabbage-kind. He threw himself over the cabbages, shielding them with his body. He looked around tentatively, waiting for the impending disaster. But it never came. In fact, the people passing by were beginning to give him strange looks (he was still hunched over the cabbages). But he didn't care, he would do anything to protect his precious produce.

Eventually, he decided it was safe, and he released his beloved cabbages with a sigh of relief. He gently rearranged a stray leaf, and patted it lovingly.

Then, without warning, there was a tremendous crash, and his cabbage cart was smashed to pieces.

"Sorry!" called a boy with a bright blue arrow on his head, who was extracting himself from the wreckage. The merchant stood dumbfounded. The boy bounded to his feet.

"My…my…" the merchant was sputtering. Three more kids raced through the wreckage, jostling the merchant and crushing cabbages underfoot.

"'Scuse me."

"Sorry." They said as they ran by. The merchant surveyed what was left of his cart with growing despair.

"My…my…" It was like a battle ground, with wounded cabbages strewn to and fro. He picked one up, lovingly cradled it to his chest, and wailed his all-to familiar lament:


A/N: I just had to put him in here. I love the cabbage man so much. Poor guy, he can never get a break. Hahaha. This was supposed to be kind of funny, by the way. I'm sorry I'm not very good at writing humorous things. Please review!