Disclaimer: We don't own 'Detective Conan' unfortunately, Gosho Aoyama owns it!
This is a joined fic, by Satuski Mugumi and Vibrant Filly, and this is our funny chapter, Enjoy!
Shinichi walked into the kitchen, where Ran had just finished washing the dishes, "Shinichi, I have to go see the doctor today…."
"I started vomiting this morning"
"Okay… that's too much information…"
Ran picks up the frying pan on the stove, "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!"
"Um…. Never mind… what time do you wanna go?"
"Now would be fine…"
"What about Conan, I've got a case to go to, Dr. Agasa is out right now, I just tried calling him,"
"Hmmm… I'm sure Ai will take care of him!"
"Are you sure, I mean…"
"He'll be fine!"
They arrive at Ai's house,
"What do you want Shinichi?" asked Ai,
"Um… anou… c-could y-ou take… care of Conan…. for….um…. awhile…?" Shinichi saw Ran in the car pointing at her wrist,
Ai sighes, "Fine, what am I getting out of this?"
"You g-get enjoyment for being with C- BYE!" Shinichi ran off leaving Conan with Ai,
"YOU OVER INCOMPETENT BAKA!!!" she looked at Conan disgusted, "Guess I'm stuck with you for awhile…"
"YEAH!!!!" yelled Conan,
"I have a bad feeling at this…"
At the Doctor's Office,
"Mrs. Kudo, the cause of your nausea, is the fact that you are allergic to Puffer Fish!"
"Thank you Doctor," said Ran as she grabs her purse beginning to leave, "Should I take any medication?"
"It's not necessary, just avoid Puffer Fish,"
"What do you wanna do kid?"
Conan looked at something on the counter, it was the APTX 4869, "I wanna play with this!!!!"
"AHHHH!!!! NOOO!!!!!!" Ai took out a barbie doll, "How about you play with this?"
"EEEWWW!!!! It's a girl toy!"
"Grrrr….. you're acting almost like Shinichi himself!"
Conan just smiled, he paused, "I wanna go potty…."
"Grrrr….. DAMN YOU SHINICHI!!!!"
At the crime scene,
"There's something missing…. DAMN IT!!!"
"Shinichi!!!!!" said Ran running up to him, "there's something important that I need to tell you!"
"Not now Ran, I'm busy!"
"B-but Shinichi, it's REALLY important," she had a sly grim on her face,
"Ran, this case is REALLY driving me up the wall, can it wait?"
"Well, it will have to wait!"
"Ran- WAIT!!! I got it!!!"
"I'M PREGNANT!!!!" yelled Ran, everyone was shocked and looked at Ran,
"The doctor also said it was gonna be twins!!!"
"How can you… twins… what?… how…. Can… what…? I'm…" Shinichi fainted, "Confused…"
Ran took out a pair of handcuffs and handcuffed him to her, "I'll be taking him now!"
Inspector Meguri watched Ran drag Shinichi away, muttering, "I'm glad my wife isn't like that…."
"Come one Shinichi, let's go to a movie!!!!"
"Okay, let's go see that new Sherlock Holmes flick!"
"No!!! let's go see the 'Legend of Red Thread 2'"
"Awww…. Shit…" Shinichi groaned, "Do we have to…?"
"YES!!!" said Ran dragging him to the ticket booth, "Let's go buy tickets!"
"Somebody…. Help me…"
"WAAHHHHH!!!!! I'M HUNGRY!!!!! I'M BORED!!!!!!!!"
"SHUT UP YOU LITTLE GAKI!!!!!"
"WAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" cried Conan,
Ai thought, "When Shinichi gets back, I'm gonna drug him with the APTX 4869 again and NEVER give him that ANTIDOTE!!!! Wait a minute, I'll be stuck taking care of him, AND Conan…. damn it… that little asshole….."
"Hey! Ran!" said Kazuha at the ticket counter,
"Hey!!!! Kazuha!!!! What are you doing here?"
"Me and Heiji are gonna see a movie!!!!"
"Really?" asked Ran, "Same here!!!"
"Since Heiji didn't wanna go…. I have to handcuff him!!!"
"No way!!! I had to do the same thing!!! What movie are you seeing?"
"Legend of the Red Thread 2!!!"
"What a coincidence, we were gonna watch that tooo!!!!!"
"No we weren't!!!" yelled both Heiji and Shinichi,
"SHUT UP!!!!" yelled both the wives who were throughly pissed,
"We're both in the same situation…." Said Shinichi, "How'd you get handcuffed?"
"During an investigation…. She told me she was pregnant…"
"Oh god…" said Shinichi, "If Ran's pregnant again…. I'm gonna die…."
"That's not all! She said that it was triplets!!!" said Heiji,
"Lucky, Ran said it was twins…"
"We're in trouble…" said Shinichi and Heiji,
"What did you do with your daughter?"
"We left her with Ai…"
"Yeah, Kazuha dropped her off, she came over to my investigation in Tokyo…"
"You're following me…aren't you…?"
"No, I think our wives we're planning our downfall…"
Kazuha and Ran gave them an evil glare, Kazuha takes out a fan and Ran takes out a frying pan, "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?!?!"
"Good!!! Let's go find seats…"
"Oh spare me of mighty god… SPARE ME!!!!!"
"Shut up Shinichi!!! You're no Christian!!"
"HELP!!!!!!!!!!!" yelled Ai, Ai picked up the phone and dialed Dr. Agasa's number, "DAMN IT!!!! He's not home!!!!"
"It's not nice to swear!" said Christie,
"Ai's going banana's!!!"
"What's a banana?"
"I don't know, my mom always says that to my dad!!!"
"Wow!!!! You're really smart!!!!"
"I know, my dad's been teaching me dedu-"
"Ai swore again!!!! AI, WE'RE HUNGRY!!!!"
"I TOLD YOU ALREADY!!! THERE'S NO FOOD IN THIS HOUSE!!!!!"
"Then go buy some!!!!"
"I'm A SCIENTIST!!!!!! Why do I have to be babysitting you little gaki's…?"
"Dr. Agasa baby-sits us!!!!"
"AM I DR. AGASA?!?!?!"
"You look like him, though!" said Conan,
"You little gaki's…."
"Hey Shinichi!!!" said Ran "Let's go get some popcorn!"
Shinichi notices all the people staring at him, "Uhhh… I don't know her…"
"Yeah… right… and you're handcuffed to me, so!" Ran drags him to the popcorn stand, "I wonder how the great Shinichi Kudo's gonna get out of this!!!"
"Wh-AT?!?!?!" yelled Shinichi, "I'm not…"
"Hey, isn't that Shinichi Kudo?"
"I heard he's the savior of the police!"
"How come he's handcuffed to that girl?"
"That's not possible, he's always escaped from everything!"
Heiji whispers something into the guy's ear, "He can never escape from his wife!"
Kazuha drags Heiji into the theater, "Ran's getting our popcorn, let's go find seats!!!"
"Evidently…. I'm in the same si-TUATION!!!!!" yelled Heiji getting dragged into the movie theater,
"I'm glad my wife doesn't act like that…" (Satsuki: Hey…. I couldn't think of anything!!!!)
Shinichi murmured, "This is gonna be one LONG night…"
"STOP IT YOU LITTLE GAKI'S!!!!! AAAHHHHH!!!!!! DON'T TAKE MY APTX 4896!!!!!!!!" yelled Ai, "AAHHH!!!! YOU'RE GONNA BREAK SOMETHING!!!!"
"crash…" (Satsuki: said that vase!
"Whoops…. AI!!!!! WE'RE BORED!!!!!"
"You've already broken half the vases in this house!!!!"
"Hey!!! Let's go break the other half!!!"
"Yeah!!! What a considerable idea!!!"
"Uhh… what does considerable mean?"
"Great…. I think…."
"Oh ok!!! Let's get going before the vases break themselves!!!"
Christie and Conan run off,
"I'm never gonna have my own kids… GET BACK HERE YOU TWO!!!"
(Satsuki: First line is Shinichi… and second line is Heiji)
"Can we go home?"
"Can we go home?"
(Satsuki: First line is Ran, second line is Kazuha)
"No… the movie hasn't even started…"
"Yes, we have like 8 minutes until the movie starts!"
"That's enough time to get home!"
"Yah, we'll pay you and Ran back, me and Shini…"
"Um… everyone's looking weird at us now…"
"Who cares… I have to go and feed the dog!"
"You don't have a dog!"
"Yeah, stop trying to- hey! the movie's starting!!!"
"Oh no! We're too late!!!"
"It's the end of the world!!!"
"… men…" said Ran and Kazuha at the same time,
"….women…." said Shinichi and Heiji at the same time,
"DR AGASA PICK UP!!!!" yelled Ai screaming at the phone, "PICK UP! PICK UP! PICK UP!"
"I don't think he's home…"
"Hey, do you have any more stuff that's glass?"
"You're lying, what's that big jar doing over there?"
"N-no!!!! That's… um… really important MATERIAL!"
"All the more breakable!"
"You learn too much from your father kid!"
"Conan's REALLY SMART!!!!!"
"Help me Lord…"
The movie is over,
"SHINICHI WAKE UP!!! IT'S TIME TO GO HOME!!!!"
"Please lemme sleep a little longer…"
"Grrr…. WAKE UP!!!!"
"You're husband's a lazy ass!" said Kazuha
"And you just noticed?"
"We HAVE to go home Kazuha! I bet Christie's gonna get worried!"
"Why'd you name your kid, Christie?" asked Ran
"As in the Queen of Mysteries…. Agatha Christie…" replied Kazuha
"We gotta get going before Christie… um…"
"Christie will be fine Heiji!!!!!"
"You don't Ai very well…"
"FINE! We're going home… to Osaka…"
"I forgot about Osaka…."
"Bye bye Ran!!!"
Ran begins to drag Shinichi home,
"What's the point of this?" asked Ai,
"I dunno…" said Conan,
At Shinichi's Place,
Shinichi wakes up, "Where am I…?"
"At home you Baka…"
"H-home? OH! The movie's over?"
"Yes, you slept right through it…"
"AND ON THE WAY HOME!!!"
"Yeah! Oops! Go get Conan!!!"
"I-I can't!!! Ai's gonna make me take the APTX 4869 again!!!"
"Then… I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM OF HAVING ANOTHR CONAN AROUND MY HOUSE!!!"
"Well… CONAN-KUN!!! You already ACT like him!"
"I never knew that…"
"GET CONAN!!! OR ELSE I CHOP YOUR HEAD OFF!!!"
"And what happened to the girl who said that I was brave, smart, cool…"
Ran unlocks the handcuffs, "GET HIM NNOOWW!!!!"
"Y-YES MA'AM!!!" said Shinichi running away from home to pick up Conan,
Ai's sitting in the middle of the floor crying, "I NEVER-NEVER THEY'D GET SO HYPER!!!"
Heiji and Shinichi arrive at the door, Ai is surprised to see them, "I thought you'd NEVER get here…."
"What happened to you…?" asked Heiji,
"and your house…" said Shinichi,
"It… it was SO sudden…" she started crying, "I never thought they'd get so hyper over a glass of juice…"
"Oh, Where's our kids?"
"I'll show you where your kids are…." She glares at them with a face, then she takes out 2 pills, "I'M MAKE YOU INTO KIDS SO THAT YOU'LL NEVER BOTHER ME AGAIN!!!"
"AHHH!!!! RUNN!!!!" yelled Shinichi, "If you take that pill, you'll never become a adult again!!!"
"OTOUSAN!!!!!" yelled Conan and Christie,
"I'm… a little busy…" said Heiji and Shinichi at the same time, being chased around by Ai,
**Cameo Appearance** Vibrant Filly enters the scene, "Hey… Ai… stop flirting… it's not good for you!" **Vibrant Filly disappears**
"Who was that?"
"I dunno…" said Heiji, "JUST RU-nnn?"
Ai stopped and dropped her pills, "Me… flirting….? You have GOT to be kidding me…"
**Satsuki enters** "Isn't that what happened with Vodka?" **Author disappears**
"VODKA?!?!?! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!?!"
Satsuki and Vibrant at the same time: Uh oh… we better make this story "M" for sure….
Satsuki: Yeah!! Let's try censoring it!!
**Repeat** "VODKA?!?!?! WHERE THE *%^$ ARE YOU?!?!?!"
Satsuki: Ahhh… that doesn't look right…
**Repeat** "VODKA?!?!?! WHERE THE (beep) ARE YOU?!?!?!"
Vibrant Filly: Let's just stick with the normal word!!!
"VODKA?!?!?! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?!?!"
"I feel like I'm experiencing Dei Ja vu… " said Ai,
"I think she's gonna change back into a little kid again…"
The Next Day…
Satsuki: WITH EMOTION!!
"What-WHAT WAS THAT?!?!?!" asked Ran as she woke up,
"I don't know… Wait… I've heard that crash before, Dr. Agasa…"
They look out the window, "DR. AGASA!!!!"
"I wanted to wake you up!!!! Heh heh heh…"
Ran has a first aid kit, "Basically how long have you been working on that thing?"
"Uhh…. 10 years… NO!!! Close to 11…"
"GIVE IT UP ALREADY!!!!" yelled Ran and Shinichi at the same time,
"But… It's gonna be worldwide!!!! If I complete this, we're gonna be RICH!!!"
"Right… right… that's what they all say…" said Ran,
"Otousan…. Okousan… I'm hungry…" said the CYUTE widdle Conan coming out rubbing his eye,
"Don't rub your eye like that, I'm going to make breakfast!"
"Okay, care to join us Professor?"
"I guess so…"
A person in black appears at the scene, "Heh… this will be the last breakfast little Conan will have with his parents…"
Satsuki and Vibrant appear behind the person in black: CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Satsuki: CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!! WHEEE!!!!!!!! Yeah…
Vibrant: Didn't you say that already…?
Satsuki: No, I WANTED to say it again! Got a problem with that?
Vibrant: I guess not…
Satsuki: Well!!! Since next chapter will be our last chapter… I wanna go to Chapters and get a book with 8 chapters! Wait… that didn't make sense…
Vibrant: No kidding! You want a book with 8 chapters, have one of mine!
Satsuki; All you read are Ranma Books!!! Oops… also X-Files books that are as big as… um… err… anou… THIS CAN OF POP!! Yeah… um… I can't really say that… how do you explain it again… Okay I'll shut up now…
Vibrant: No fair! I also read Redwall, which are a lot bigger than X-Files…
Satsuki: Yeah… right… who'd wanna read a book where animals talk…? Heh… my brother!!!
Vibrant: Lots of people. Go 2 the website…
Satsuki: What's up with this! Ranma and Detective Conan are almost both the same! Except the part where this guy changes into this girl… but it's almost the same because Shinichi changes into a little boy! But Ranma changes into a girl… but Ranma is a little perverted because it sometimes shows him naked... at times… heh… I almost forgot that Conan/Shinichi took bathes with Ran!!! That counts!!! Also, Kappei Yamaguchi does the voice of Shinichi AND Ranma (male) COOL!!!! :D
Vibrant: Okay… enough… that's too long!
Shinichi: Can we end this now?
Satsuki: Why is he here, isn't he suppose to be making out with Ran or something?
Shinichi: I guess… WHAT?!?!?!
Satsuki: HAHA! We'll make a hentai fic where Shinichi's making out with Ran!!!
Genee: YEAH!!!!!! Ooohhh… Ssshhhiiinnniiiccchhiii… Oooh…yyyeeeeaaaaahhhhh…
Satsuki and Vibrant: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! YOU PERVERSE KID!!!!!!!!!!!
Shinichi: Over my dead body!
Satsuki: hey, I wouldn't be talking… you did it once…
Shinichi: I did not…. SHUT UP!!!!!! I SAID OVER MY DEAD BODY!!!
Ran enters the scene with a frying pan in her hand: That could be arranged…
Shinichi: OH SHIT!!!!!!!
Ran chases Shinichi around the room with a frying pan,
Satsuki: Isn't this a small computer room?
Vibrant: Yeah… table takes up most the space, Hey! he tripped!
Satsuki: I wonder how he tripped?
Vibrant: His shoes laces were untied…
Satsuki: That could be a possibility…
Vibrant: Or he tripped over his own 2 feet!
Satsuki notices her own to feet is out: Heh… I didn't do anything!!! Let's change the subject!
Artemis: Um… can I bug you?
Vibrant: No! Get lost you Gaki!
Artemis: I wanna read your books!
Ran hits Artemis over the head by accident: G-GOMEN NE!!!!! SHINICHIII!!!!!!!
Vibrant and Satsuki: YEAH!!!! SHE'S DEAD!!!!!!
Shinichi: Can we end this now?
Vibrant and Satsuki: Fine…
Genee: Ooooohhh…. Shinichi…. Yeyyeeaaahhh…
Vibrant: Someone… get…. Her… OUT OF HERE PLEASE!!!!!
Satsuki: JA NE!!! CYA NEXT CHAPTER!!!!!!!!
~Author's Notes (Finally…)~