Between The Sheets
Warning: This isn't a usual fluff by me. If you want that, go elsewhere. Another inspired by Sugarcult. God, I really love those boys.
"Is everything in order for tonight?" Hironobu asks me.
I watch as he sits calmly at the table, reading the morning paper. He doesn't look at me as he speaks, but I know he is still waiting to see what my reaction will be. After three years though, I've learned to keep myself composed on these occasions.
"Of course. Everyone will be arriving this evening just as you wanted. I've even gone and purchased a new outfit for the party as well. I think you will be most pleased," I keep my voice steady as I try to find the courage to ask the one thing I know he doesn't want to hear. "Sei called the other day. She is in town for the weekend. I was hoping she could attend tonights dinner as well?"
He folds his paper slowly, leveling his eyes to mine. He hates her I know. She's too rough of a woman. She's too wild. She is no lady he says. But she is my best friend. It is the only thing I ever ask of him and the one thing he wishes I would get over.
I keep my eyes locked with his, refusing to back down. It is my most unlady-like feature he says. He is not pleased but what is to be expected in a loveless marriage?
"Alright," he relents finally. "But if she does anything to embarass me in front of my co-workers I will not hesitate to ask her to leave."
The answer is enough for me. I know Sei will be well behaved if she has to be, even though she hates Hironobu as much as he hates her. Sometimes I think even I may hate him as much as her.
It's only on nights like this when I hate him though. The nights when he wants to dangle me in front of his friends and fellow workers as his prize possesion. The nice piece of meat that he has caught for looks and nothing more. Mizuno Youko, trophy wife to a millionaire and the most miserable person in the world.
I excuse myself from the table to call Sei and let her know I expect her to come see me tonight. After listening to her rant about my "worthless husband" for a bit we get off the phone and I set about preparing myself for the evening ahead. This is going to be a small party with only about ten of Hironobu's closest friends at work. Which means I will have to be sufficently social with all of them at some point.
The day passes slowly as I check on the preparations. We will start with dinner of course which will be followed by cocktails in his entertaining room. The house staff has everything in order so I go to my study to read while I wait for the long hours to pass.
Finally Hironobu knocks on my door and asks me to help him with his tie. I realize it is his way of telling me to get ready for our guests without having to say it. For a moment I feel like a normal happily married couple while I finish with his tie and he bends down to kiss me lightly on the cheek.
"Don't let your friend mess this up for me tonight," he says before walking out. Moment ruined.
I block it from my mind as I move to my bedroom to get dressed. Soon Sei will be here and this will all be okay. My life will feel as if it is my own again, at least for a short while. I smile to myself as I put on just a little bit of make-up, taking extra time not for him or his guests but for her.
When I am done I check once more on the staff to make sure that everything is still going smoothly. As expected everything is perfect, and it isn't long before guests start arriving. It is one of my duties to answer the door as Hironobu believes it is far too impersonal for a butler to be greeting close friends. Much better to use his wife for his bidding.
I greet the various men that show up and find myself growing happy to find that none of them have brought their wives. That means that after dinner I will be dismissed so that the men can talk of things not meant for a ladies ears. That means I will have time to be with Sei alone.
Finally she too arrives and much to my dismay Hironobu is with me as I greet her. We hug tightly, for precisely thirty-seven seconds too long, which Hirnobu quietly chides me for later. I hadn't been aware that there was a rule of how long to properly hug your dearest friend.
I lead Sei to the room where everyone has gathered as we wait for the rest of the guests. After quick introductions I reluctantly leave Sei's side to socialize with various men, some of whom I know quite well by now. Sei knows the drill by now as well, so she makes small talk with those around her but never do her eyes leave me. The weight of them is almost unbearable as I try to focus on my duty.
Finally everyone has arrived and we move to our formal dining room to sit for dinner. Hironobu and I sit at opposite ends of the table as always, and I'm relieved to find that he shows no sign of objection as Sei sits next to me. Though I suppose there isn't much he can say that wouldn't make him look rude in front of his friends.
The meal itself is excellent as always. Four courses done by the best kitchen staff money can buy. The actual experience however was hard to bear as I felt Sei's hand on my thigh, her fingers sliding just beneath the hem of my skirt to feel her skin against my own. My body melts at her touch as it always has but now she makes no sign of having any interest in me at all.
On the contrary she is leading the conversation as she lays on her best 'lady' skills to flirt with the men around her and pretend she has no knowledge of business life whatsoever. The men fall over themselves to tell her about what they do as she puts her charms on, none having and clue about the reason she is really here. About the secrets that we keep.
Almost agonizingly slowly dinner comes to an end and by then I am almost unable to move after having Sei tease me for so long. "Please excuse us," I say as I stand up and make a polite bow. "My friend and I shall leave you to enjoy your evening now."
Hironobu smiles at me genuinely to show that he is pleased with how well things went. His nod grants me permission to leave the men to their business and Sei stands to leave with me. Some of the guys call out to her and ask her to come back next time so they can have a fair shot with her. Whether it is to tease the men, or piss Hironobu off, I can't say but Sei decides to turn around and blow them a kiss before walking out of the dining room.
The door clicks in place behind us and she doesn't waste time as she pushes me against the wall and kisses me. "I've missed you," she breathes out between kisses. Her body presses tightly to mine and I bite my lip to keep quiet as her lips find my neck.
"Let's go to my room," I say finally, managing to push her away from me.
She lets out a whimper in protest of the sudden loss of contact but follows me none the less. We walk normally, like two ladies on a stroll about the house, even though all we want is to finally be safely alone. It is all we have ever wanted since high school.
Only it took us years after high school to finally admit it to each other. Which is why we're stuck in such a horrible situation. She is going to school in another country and I was already married by the time we discovered how we felt about each other. Now we have learned to live for these stolen moments. Only they seem to grow harder and harder as time passes.
"Are you sure we're safe here?" she asks nervously as we enter my bedroom. I lift my hand to her face and pull her into a gentle kiss in answer. Her arms wrap around my body as she pulls me close to her and I lay my head on her shoulder, giving into the rare tenderness of her touch.
The moment ends quickly once our lips meet again, this time with much more intensity. We don't speak again as we move to the bed, stripping off each others clothing with ease after having years of pactice with moments like these. "You look beautiful," she says to me before crushing her lips to mine and pushing me onto the bed.
This is her giving me everything she has.
The friction of our skin is unbearable as we make love. Our mouths never part as we slide in and out of each other. We keep them busy so we don't have to speak of what cowards we both are. I feel my nails digging into her skin as I hold onto her, trying to keep myself from crying as I think of everything that should have been between of us.
Finally she pulls her mouth from mine to look into my eyes. I can feel her breath as we continue to move in time with each other, knowing without words that this moment is sacred to her. The moment when she gets to be reminded that she is the only one who is allowed to touch me. She is the only one who can please me.
She finally collapses on top of me and we share no words as I run my fingers through her hair. Her head lays on my chest and I have no doubt that she is listening to my heart beating beneath her ear. It is the same as it always is.
We stay like this for a long time content to just be touching, stealing fleeting kisses from one another. I want to cry but I never do when she is here. I don't want to taint the few moments we have.
"I should go," she says finally, her voice faltering slightly.
I don't try to stop her, but I can't bring myself to let go of her either. I look around the room at our clothes lining the floor and grow angry at everything.
One day she is going to grow to hate me.
She stands finally and begins to piece together her clothing and I watch her dress from bed. This is what we've walked into. Fucking when no one is looking and tearing each other's hearts out as we both remain to cowardly to change anything.
I sit up as she returns to me and kisses me again. "I'll see you again soon," she says as I wrap my arms around her neck and hold her tightly.
I can feel her pulling away from me and I finally release her, watching her walk towards the door. "They won't notice me leaving, right?"
I shake my head and she gives me a sad smile.
"Sei, I..." I want to say it but the words won't come out. They seem too big to say just before losing her again.
"I know. It's why I keep coming back."
"I could leave all of this behind," I call out, desperate.
"For what? I have nothing to offer you," she says sadly, but truthfully. "I want you to never be left wanting for anything."
"But I want you constantly!" It comes out almost as a yell.
"We live in different worlds Youko. You know that I could never be more then just a visitor in yours."
You couldn't save me.
I watch her walk out and shatter once I am left alone. I cling to the sheets that moments ago bound us together as the tears fall from my eyes. It takes all my resolve to not run after her but I know that her words are true. She is a broke student in another country and I have nothing of my own. But I know I can't live this way forever.
I cannot live this way forever.