Disclaimer: Inuyasha? Nope, don't own it. Sounds sexy though.
Sesshomaru was out walking around again. It was now four days since everybody in the whole of Japan went missing. He realized it was just Japan when he flew to China and saw that they still had their people. It was just Japan. Sesshomaru was weighing his options on what to do with his life. He figured that, since Japan was out of people, he should go somewhere else. Perhaps that new joint on the other side of the sea that just got discovered. He heard rumors that they didn't take too kindly to demons. It didn't matter to him, though. They couldn't take him down no matter how hard they tried anyways. It was still unnerving, just to think what may have happened to these people.
What if the Shikon Jewel was pieced back together and some demon wished that everyone would be wiped out and, for some strange reason, it had no effect on him? That didn't make sense. Sesshomaru thought that maybe the Shikon Jewel had no effect on him. There was no way he could be certain.
That's what pissed this badass demon lord off the most.
He decided that he would never be able to rest unless he finally found out what annihilated everybody. So the search began. Beneath every rock, inside every tree (except Teddy, because he already inspected him... THOROUGHLY), digging holes to find some foul substance that may have contaminated the water. Nothing came up. Sesshomaru still hadn't stumbled across the one thing potent enough to wipe out an entire nation, save one lonely demon.
Until one day.
Sesshomaru was wandering in a daze, impoverished from having no nutrients for days. He was worried that, if he sucked any "food" from the ground, it may kill him. Sesshomaru didn't rule out the possibility that some form of poison had made it's way into the ground. It was no easy task though, and Sesshomaru knew he would soon die. It was astouding, really, that this is how he would go out. He had always figured he'd either be killed in some sort of epic battle, or he would die of old age, with a motherless child sitting by his side in the year 1973 or someshit. Instead, though, he was pathetically stumbling through an empty land because he was too proud to go ahead and get to another neighboring nation. Now it was too late. He was too tired and weak, he couldn't fly, and his vision was blurred. He decided that he would risk feeding from the ground. If he got poisoned, it would better than dying from starvation. Besides, it would also mean that he found the reason that this overnight genocide happened, and he could finally rest in peace, knowing that he died finally finding the answer to the question that throbbed in his mind for so long.
It worked, Sesshomaru was still alive, and was now restored. Sesshomaru was thankful, in a way, that he would live to go on searching, or finally give up and go to another place. On the other hand, if he'd have been poisoned, it would have at least ended his search with good results. He went on searching, going back to the same old places, same trees, he even went to visit Teddy, who was rotting hecause the hand print REALLY, REALLY HURT. By evening, the sun was setting, and Sesshomaru decided he would cap the day off by going to the ocean and watching the sun reflect off of the water. It usually helped him think in situations where it required him to use his wits. He went to the edge of Japan and looked down at the water.
Why the hell were there a bunch of purple tubes sticking out of the water?
Sesshomaru stared at these tubes, bewildered, but his stunned staring quickly ceased when he realized that these tubes were making sounds. It was as if these tubes were... breathing. He decided to find out for himself by grabbing one of the tubes. He snatched the one closest to him. About three seconds later, someone came out of the water and tried to grab it from him. But he promptly jumped back into the water after making some sort of weird, scrunched-up facial expression. He kept his head over water.
"Are all these tubes in the water being held by people?" Sesshomaru asked, too stunned to be angry yet.
"Yes!" The man responded fearfully "A young girl supplied these tubes for us to breathe with so we could hide."
"Hide from WHAT, may I ask?"
Sesshomaru was pissed off. He almost lost his mind because a bunch of stupid cocks wanted to hide from something? This is bullshit!
"Answer me, you whimpering little bitch!" Sesshomaru commanded ferociously, almost as if he was going to turn into giant three-legged dog form any second.
"I-I've said too much!" The man stuttered pathetically.
Sesshomaru decided he would jump into the water and look for Jaken and Rin, since they were most likely dicking around under here also, and ask them just what was going on? Hiding? From what? And why was he the only one who doesn't have a clue what's going on? He hopped in and, when he opened his eyes, nothing was there. They had all gotten out! Sesshomaru rose back up and the first thing he heard was a loud roar of cheering. Sesshomaru's sensitive ears couldn't take all the loudness and he screamed out until they stopped. Then he got out.
"Which one of you bastard-assholes is going to explain just what the entire human population of Japan was hiding under the goddamn water for?" roared Sesshomaru.
Inuyasha came out of the crowd.
"Because, up to this point, it had been almost a full year since you got in the water and took a bath." Inuyasha told him bluntly.
"You heard me, Sesshomaru! The last time you took a bath before this was ten months ago! We were planning to do this for weeks and everyone agreed to it, even Naraku! So Kagome brought some plastic breathing tubes and we used a shard of the Jewel to multiply the tubes so that all the people could breathe when we hid under water."
"The Shikon Jewel can clone?"
"Yeah, as it turns out."
(PLOT BENDS, AND WHAT THEY CAN DO FOR YOU!)
"What about the animals and insects?" Sesshomaru asked, almost impressed by the rather elaborate plan.
"Oh, the Shikon Jewel can also make them invisible, as it turns out." Inuyasha said.
(PLOT BENDS, AND WHAT THEY CAN DO FOR YOU!)
"Inuyasha, you almost drove me to psychosis over a bath." Sesshomaru growled, drawing his sword. "Now, I'm going to make you pay."
Before Sesshomaru the Badass can open a (JAPANESE CONTAINER) of whoopass, Jaken and Rin came running out of the crowd.
"No, don't kill him! He was only trying to help!" Rin pleaded, running to the wet Lord.
"The stench was unbearable! It smelled like a pile of rotten skunks sprayed with that green water Kagome was laying in a tub of when Kikyo was reunited! It reeked like-"
"Okay, Rin, I get it."
Sesshomaru starts walking, vowing that he would someday slaughter Inuyasha for what he did. And, yet, he was also relieved that Japan wasn't stripped of it's population overnight over a disease or a war. Things were back to normal...
Except for the invisible wolf humping Sesshomaru's leg.