DISCLAIMER I do not own Bicso Hatori's Ouran High School Host Club or any of the characters. I just like writing about them and making them do my bidding…he he he.
L'Amour Se réveille
Valentines Day was a big day for the Ouran High School Host Club. Much was expected of each of the boys, in fulfilling their obligations to the beautiful girls that paid for their services. This year, however, the illustrious king of the Host Club decided on something a little bit different.
A dance was much too…shall we say…normal for the blonde king. These lovely ladies deserved the best he could offer them. That is why he had arranged for five carriages, each drawn by a beautiful white horse, to carry the girls and their chosen princes on a romantic moonlit ride beneath the cherry blossoms. Mori and Honey would share a carriage, as well as Hikaru and Kaoru, leaving one carriage each for Haruhi, Kyoya and himself.
He had taken every detail into consideration. The carriages were of the finest quality, each being white and lined with gold detailing. The horses were from his private stables, and he was lucky he happened to like white horses. There were five different routes to take, and each would be only about ten minutes, if driven at the moderate pace he had deemed appropriate. Kyoya would handle the payment amounts according to the number of girls that they'd be able to accommodate in the amount of time they had for the evening. They would of course, have to begin just as the sun was setting. Sunsets were, of course, extremely romantic. Women also seemed to look the most beautiful in the moonlight.
A sudden image of Haruhi in a pink silky dress, clinging to him as the moon shone in through the window seemed to imprint itself on his mind. Tamaki's breath stopped and he smiled, closing his eyes and letting his imagination run with it. The beautiful image of a father protecting his daughter…it was a beautiful thing. She was a beautiful thing…
"Everything's set for tomorrow," Kyoya stated as he scribbled figures in his ever present notebook. Snapped thusly out of his daydream, Tamaki praised his vice president for a job well done. He looked around the room. The last guests of February 13th were being bidden farewell by their hosts with the utmost decorum and sincerity. His eyes were slowly drawn from the retreating females, to the hosts…Hikaru, Kaoru and Haruhi to be more precise. They were badgering her again with inappropriate touches and remarks, and Tamaki felt as though a hand had taken hold of his heart and was slowly squeezing the life out of it.
He took a step forward, raising his arm in protest, about to intervene on his daughter's behalf when something he saw made him stop. She was laughing. Part of him declared that she had fallen for their trickery and deception and that he had to put a stop to it right away. But the part that had stopped him, asked why the evil doppelgangers looked at her that way. When Haruhi spoke with Hikaru, there was something in Kaoru's eyes as he looked at her, tentatively reached for her shoulder, and drew her attention back to him. There was also something in the way Hikaru's eyes became…was it sad? apprehensive?...as Haruhi turned from him to his brother.
Haruhi smiled, laughed, played with them. And something inside began to eat away at him. His eyes lost their focus on the trio and rested on his outstretched hand. Tamaki quickly drew it to his chest, covering it with his other hand as though it had been wounded somehow.
"Kyoya-san," he said, a cloud beginning to form around his head. He felt, more than saw Kyoya turn to look at him.
"What is it, Tamaki-san?" he asked coolly. Tamaki noticed the smirk on Kyoya's face as the light glinted off of his glasses.
"I think those devil twins might…and this is just a quick observation that could mean nothing," yet as he said the words, something in him knew them to be true. "Hikaru and Kaoru seem…they seem to…like…Haruhi." Kyoya's smirk turned downward at his words, and he looked to the trio himself. After a few moments, eyes still on them, he answered.
"It would seem so." He looked back at Tamaki.
"Does it also seem that…she might…like them as well?" Even as the words left his lips he regretted them. Somewhere inside, Tamaki knew that, once spoken aloud, the idea would be out there, making a situation real.
And he definitely did not want it to be real.
"She does not seem to dislike them," was Kyoya's answer. Tamaki turned to him quickly. He could feel his eyes watering and the hand on his heart squeezed even tighter, creating a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. He felt that something had been lifted from in front of his eyes to see something that had always been there…yet he didn't know how to face it.
"Have they liked her a long time?" he asked, swallowing the lump that had risen into his throat. He knew in his mind that he would normally be in hysterics right now, fighting with the twins for Haruhi's attention, yet right now, his body and mind seemed eerily calm.
"I believe they have," Kyoya said, resting a hand on Tamaki's shoulder.
"Then I should be happy, right?" he said quickly, looking to Kyoya for an answer to his suffering. "I should be happy that my daughter has found someone who loves her." Kyoya smiled that strange smile again.
"A father would want his daughter to be happy, and to be loved. A father must give his daughter up one day to be loved by a man who will take care of her."
"But her father takes care of her and loves her," Tamaki interjected. "They cannot love her as much as her father."
"A father's love has its place, Tamaki. If a father truly loves his daughter as a father should, he will give her up to the man she loves, and be happy about it. He would not be losing a daughter, but gaining a son."
Tamaki frowned, his eyebrows furrowing together. Kyoya watched him a long time as he thought things over in his head. Tamaki simply watched them, something breaking inside of him with every touch, caress, and playful gesture made upon his precious daughter. And try as he might, he could not be happy.
"I will see you tomorrow," he said softly to Kyoya as he lowered his head and walked out the door.
This could not be happening. Tamaki loved his daughter and longed only for her happiness! If one of the twins made her happy, then why did that not make him happy as well?
Because they are no good! They were just playing with her, as always. True, the thought to the voice of passion.
But you know they aren't just playing. Their eyes were sincere and intense. They love her, spoke reason. Tamaki's pace quickened. That was truth, over the voice of passion, and the knowledge of that truth was like a solid punch to the stomach. No more thinking. In a flash, Tamaki ran through the halls of Ouran, out the front gates, and met his limo as it was driving up to meet him.
Once seated inside, Tamaki concentrated on nothing but breathing. He felt like his heart was about to explode out of his chest, for more than one reason, none of which he cared to think about at the moment…or ever. His driver began to tell him of the schedule for the rest of the day. He was to dine with his father and some business associates at a high class French restaurant. Afterwards he would be driven back to the second Suoh mansion to meet with a tutor who would help him with his Kanji and Mathematics studies. His breathing slowed as he listened quietly and stared at the cloth covered ceiling of the limo. He was glad that he had a lot to do.
Yet it all came flooding back to him that night, as he lay in bed, in the darkness of his room, with nothing but his own thoughts to torment him into what he had quickly realized would be a sleepless night.
They had caressed her face, a face he knew to be marvelously soft, though he himself had only touched her once or twice in such a manner, which he had deemed quite appropriate for a father to do. When the twins touched her like that, she smiled and laughed. Why did she act confused or irritated when he touched her in the exact same manner, with the best of intentions?
Tamaki imagined himself chastely touching her cheek with his fingers. Then his hand opened to cup her cheek, his thumb slowly moving across her soft, small lips. As they parted slightly, he could almost feel her breath, hot against the skin of his thumb as it passed over again. Slowly his hand moved across her silky skin to her neck, his fingers tracing along the edge of her hairline. He imagined her soft gasp as he pulled her to him in a firm embrace. The simple scent of her hair would fill him, as her body molded against his own.
Tamaki sat up quickly in his bed, his bare chest protesting the sudden cool air that hit it. Why was he breathing so hard? Why did it seem as if his heart was on fire? This was wrong! So completely and painfully wrong! He was horrible, dirty and perverted to think such things! His love for her was pure, chaste, and fatherly! It wasn't this…this…
Tamaki saw the vision again, this time with one of the twins in his place. It didn't matter which one, but anger, pain, and a horrid sense of loss filled him so completely that he threw his blanket off of him and he stood, punching his fist into the wall beside his bed. Sweat began to bead at his hairline, though his room was slightly chilled, and his breath came in short pants.
Slowly he fell to his knees, eyes wide as he faced his wall. They would never lay their hands on her in such away, as long as he was alive. It was more than just protection, though he fought within himself on that point.
NO! His mind shouted at him. There WAS more. Slowly, it was as if a wall inside of him began to crumble.
A father would never touch his daughter that way. One section down…
A father would not WANT to touch his daughter in such a way. The wall was half gone.
"Then why do I want to?" he spoke aloud. "Why did such a thought cross my mind?" Images of Haruhi flooded his memories. Haruhi being pushed off of a cliff into the water. Haruhi cuddled against him as he carried her from the ocean. Haruhi clinging to him with all her might as the lightening and thunder crashed outside the dark room. Haruhi smiling at him, walking with him, talking with him. Haruhi calling out to him as he drove away. Haruhi reaching for him…for him…
The wall within him crumbled.
He wasn't her father. He knew that…had always known that. His love for her was pure…but it was anything but fatherly.
Sudden longing hit him harder and faster than anything had ever hit him physically. He longed to hold her, caress her, touch her, and kiss her…passionately and with complete abandon.
"Je l'aime…" he whispered out loud to himself…and as the reality of the words reached his hearing, he felt a tear slip from his eye and down his cheek. The weight of the emotion overpowered him, and he doubled over, falling to his side on the floor next to his bed. There he gave himself over to the flood that engulfed him.
When he was finally calm, Tamaki wiped the wetness from his cheeks and pulled himself up onto his bed. There was only one question haunting him now.
What happens next?
End of Chapter
L'Amour Se réveille - Love Awakens
Je l'aime - I love her
Author's Note - So! It's been a long time since I've written a fanfiction, let alone an OHSHC fanfic. Please let me know what you think!