ANGEL: You teach?

COLLINS: Yeah, I teach. Computer age philosophy. And this is my classroom.

ANGEL: Cool! Hey, do you think I could teach the class? Just for today?

COLLINS: Go ahead. I need a break, anyway.

ANGEL: Finally! I get to teach a WHOLE lesson all by myself! And I'm gonna teach something relevant. Something modern…the internet! (sung) The internet is really, really great…

COLLINS: For actual reality!

ANGEL: I've got a fast connection so I don't have to wait…

COLLINS: For actual reality!

ANGEL: Huh? There's always a new site…

COLLINS: For actual reality!

ANGEL: You can browse all day and night…

COLLINS: For actual reality!

ANGEL: It's like you're surfing at the speed of light…

COLLINS: For actual reality!

ANGEL: Collins! What are you doing?

COLLINS: The internet is for actual reality. The internet is for actual reality. Act up, fight AIDS! That, you see, is actual, actual reality!

ANGEL: (spoken) COLLINS!!

COLLINS: Oh, hey there Angel!
ANGEL: You're ruining my song!

COLLINS: Can I have your coat?

ANGEL: Take it.

COLLINS: Are you serious?

ANGEL: Sure, I don't care. (sung) I'm glad we have this new technology…

COLLINS: For actual reality!

ANGEL: Which gives us untold opportunity…

COLLINS: For actual…um…

ANGEL: Right from your own desktop…

COLLINS: For…

ANGEL: You can research browse and shop until you've had enough and you're ready to stop…

COLLINS: FOR ACTUAL REALITY!

ANGEL: I'm cold…

COLLINS: The internet is for actual reality…

ANGEL: Noooo…Collins!

COLLINS: The internet is for actual reality! This, Angel, is my theory of actual, actual reality!

ANGEL: (spoken) I'm cold…I want my coat back!
COLLINS: Get a sweater.

ANGEL: No really, I want my coat back. Anyway, normal people don't go around telling people to fight AIDS!

COLLINS: Oh really? You have no idea! Ready, normal people?

ROGER: Ready!

MARK: Ready!

BENNY: Ready…?

COLLINS: Lemme hear it!

COLLINS, ROGER, MARK, BENNY: The internet is for actual reality!

ROGER: Sorry Angel…

COLLINS, ROGER, MARK, BENNY: The internet is for actual reality!

ROGER: What rhymes with Angel?!
COLLINS: Please, NYU, don't expire me for actual, actual reality!

ANGEL: How did these people even get here?

COLLINS, ROGER, MARK, BENNY: Actual, actual…

ANGEL: (spoken) Wait a second! Roger, I thought you HATED Collins!

ROGER: I don't hate him, I just hate the way he thinks.

ANGEL: Mark, you don't even have AIDS!

MARK: That's what YOU think…

ANGEL: And Benny…Benny, why the hell are you here?

BENNY: I have nothing better to do with my life, okay?

COLLINS: But Angel, don't you they support actual reality ANYWAY?

ANGEL: I don't know…look, I'm STILL cold!

COLLINS, ROGER, MARK, BENNY: (sung) The internet is for actual reality!

ANGEL: Freezing my ass off here…I hate men! Give me my coat back! Oh, I hate this coat! I'm outta here!

COLLINS, ROGER, MARK, BENNY: The internet is for actual reality!

COLLINS: Say it with me, 1, 2, 3…

COLLINS, ROGER, MARK, BENNY: Actual, actual reality! Actual, actual, reality! Actual, actual…The internet is for, internet is for, internet is for actual reality!

COLLINS: Angel…?