Alan watched his wife, Monica, get ready for bed. He sighed. As soon as she crawled into bed and into his arms, Alan kissed her head.
"Hmm?" Monica craned her head up to look at Alan.
"When are we going to discuss your affair?" Alan asked gently.
Monica stiffed. "What affair?"
Monica sighed. "Honestly, Alan, it was two times. I—I don't know what to say. It was Rick. It was all the old times and I don't have responsibilities with him. I don't have children, or family meals with him, I don't have to work through things. It was easier."
Alan sighed. "Do you love him?"
Monica didn't answer.
"Oh. Well, then…" Alan's mind went blank.
"Oh, for God's sakes it's not a yes or no answer, Alan." Monica snapped. "I suppose I'll always love him in a way. But at the end of day, I want to be with you. I want to have the life with you despite the fact it's hard sometimes. I love both of you but I want you in my life."
"You needed to sleep with Rick to figure this out?"
"I-"Monica laughed bitterly. "I have no excuse. Leave me. Drop roofs on me. I messed up. It was nothing you did or with us. I just really messed up."
"Oh, honey." Alan tightened his hold on Monica. "I wish you told me you were thinking about this."
"I wasn't! It just happened." Monica closed her eyes. Alan took a deep breath.
"Honey, we haven't made love since Rick's return…" Alan realized what that meant. "Oh, how could you be so stupid? Two doctors!"
"My test results come in tomorrow." Monica began to cried harder. "Alan, I said I was stuck by a needle. No one knows."
"I guess I should grateful at your age, there wasn't a chance of pregnancy. This time." Alan stared at his wife. "This is why you were freaked out about your cold last week."
"Yes." Monica's heart raced at the thought of AIDS invading her body. "I knew you would get suspicious if I ask you to use a condom."
Kissing her forehead, Alan closed his eyes. "What time tomorrow?"
"Nine." Monica whispered.
"Ok. I'll push my meeting back."
"You don't have to go." Monica felt ashamed.
"Sweetheart, you could have a potentially fatal disease. Where else would I be?" Alan asked, rubbing Monica's back. Monica opened her mouth to protest but said nothing at first. She then whispered,
"I don't know why I keep doing this to you."
"We both do it." Alan shrugged. "How did you leave it with Rick?"
"I need to break it off." Monica sighed. "Tomorrow. I'll make arrangements to see him. You can go with me."
"Go to sleep, sweetheart. The world will look better tomorrow. I still love you."
"I know. I love you, Alan. Always. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow." Monica placed her head over his heart. "Alan?"
"Should I beware of falling roofs?"
"No. We'll work through this. I'll call Gail and make an appointment. Sleep." Alan said, praying that they would get one final chance to get it right, praying for tomorrow.