I don't own anything.
26. Come up to him and say, "I would LOVE to be in YOUR locker.." and wink.
27. Ask him if he can do that scary Dutchmanny face DJ can do in DMC.
28. When he's sleeping, shave his head.
29. Give him diet pills, always saying he needs to look more like Jack.
30. Buy him an I-Cat.
31. Paint the Dutchman blue and add sparkles. Say it'll match nicely with the Pearl's pink glittery sails. (An: Read 25 Ways to Annoy Captain Jack Sparrow to get that)
32. Buy him a convertible.
33. For Christmas, buy him a Viking wig. Say that it'll remind him of Elizabeth when they're apart.
34. Put little Beckett images on the deck of the Dutchman.
35. Swing random booms around on the ship, trying to hit Will.
36. Buy him hideously saggy outfits, saying he has to be more gangster to run the Flying Dutchman.
38. Pretend you're Elizabeth. Walk around in hideously poofy dresses and at random moments scream "I AM THE PIRATE KING!"
39. When he's looking at you, fall on the floor in a dead faint, then wake up with a dazed expression on your face, and start doodling little heart with the words "I love Jack Sparrow" on your knee.
40. Rut masking tape everywhere. Including the bathroom, the mermaid lady at the front of the ship, and his face.
41. Insist on giving him manicures every Tuesday at 12:00 AM. If he doesn't come, go into his cabin and steal all his clothes.
42. Introduce him to the Emo style.
43. Get all teary-eyed, and pushing him against the wall yelling, "THIS IS NOT WORKING! I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL! I—I KNOW YOU DON'T—IT'S NOT YOU—IT'S ME!! NO, IT IS YOU! I CAN'T LIVE THIS WAY ANYMORE! I'M SORRY—BUT I'M IN LOVE WITH YOUR FATHER!"
44. Buy him rum. Make him drink it. Say alcoholics turn you on.
45. Randomly scream "I'M A SCAT-MAN!"
46. Bring a life size doll of Beckett. "Accidently" let him find you getting down and dirty with it.
47. Take him ice-skating. Make sure he doesn't have gloves or knee pads.
48. When you take him ice-skating, get him girl skates.
49. Smell like Oxy-Clean. ALL the time.
50. In the middle of the night, come into his room waving your arms about and saying you're Davy Jones's conscience.