Harry Malfoy and Draco Potter

Disclaimer: This is just a bit of silly fun, not at all associated with the real "Harry Potter" books/movies/multimedia empire.

Warnings: This story will (eventually) feature Harry/Draco slash. There will also be some Harry/Cho, Harry/Cedric, Draco/Oliver, in case you cannot bear to imagine them with anyone else.

Chapter 1 – Mismatched Marriages

I. Harry Malfoy

The Malfoy Prophecy Armband was a prized Dark family treasure that was kept in the secret room under the drawing room of Malfoy Manor. During the Christmas holidays of his fifth year at Hogwarts, young Lucius Malfoy took it without telling his parents. He was no good at divination and thought it would help with his homework. He tried it out on his first night back at Hogwarts.

The vision began with a red-haired Gryffindor girl, Lily Evans, one of Sirius Black's misfit friends. She appeared to be about four years older and at least twice as beautiful as she was now. She was wearing a wedding dress and veil.

So the prophecy was that Lily Evans would become gorgeous and marry someone. She was a filthy mudblood so Lucius would never want to touch her himself, but this information may be useful in the future. The vision wouldn't help much for Lucius's divination homework, but it was better than nothing.

But then the vision shifted. Evans was older and now standing over a crib. She leaned over the side and smiled at her baby, and she looked even more beautiful than before, three times as attractive as she was at age 15.

Wow. Lucius could never marry a mudblood, but maybe it would not completely taint the family name if he took her as a mistress… Maybe she would take her clothes off next.

Unfortunately the vision moved to the baby, a tiny infant only a few months old with no hair yet but very green eyes.

Lucius didn't know much about babies and he wasn't especially interested in Evans's kid. Wait, unless it was his, which it couldn't be because he would never have an illegitimate child. That would cause problems with inheritance, unless Lucius was very, very careful. Was this the message of the prophecy?

Evans was now speaking. "My son Harry will be the greatest hero in the wizarding world. He will be the most powerful wizard since Grindelwald. Lord Voldemort will be nothing compared to my son. He will determine the fate of the entire world. He will be our savior."

The baby squirmed and blinked, and Lucius decided that it was most definitely his son, definitely a Malfoy. Harry Malfoy, hero of the wizarding world. The vision faded, and Lucius knew he had work to do. The Malfoy Prophecy Armband was never wrong. Lily Evans was going to be his wife.

30 October, 1981

Tonight was the big night: Lucius Malfoy would present his son Harry to Lord Voldemort to be appointed his heir.

Lucius had not told his wife what he had planned. Lily wouldn't understand. He did love his wife, in his way, but because of her unfortunate mudblood heritage, she would never understand the true state of the wizarding world or Lord Voldemort's message of hope. She thought that Lucius was selflessly risking his life to act as a spy on the Death Eaters for her friends. She was wrong.

Lord Voldemort appreciated Lucius much more than Dumbledore and his mindless minions ever did. When Albus Dumbledore said jump, Potter, Black, Longbottom, and the rest pushed and shoved each other for the chance to be the first to jump highest. No one in the Order of the Phoenix trusted Lucius. He was never given any responsibilities or important tasks. They merely tolerated him at the meetings because they liked his wife.

Lord Voldemort respected Lucius's ideas and listened to Lucius's suggestions. Such as letting certain, exceptional mudbloods live if they were able to prove their willingness to completely abandon the Muggle world, like his beautiful wife Lily did. And Voldemort was also in favor of letting Halfbloods become Death Eaters, which would be necessary if little Harry followed in his father's footsteps.

Lucius had been so impressed with Lord Voldemort's leadership that he had told him about his son's prophecy. Just as Lucius expected, Voldemort was not upset to hear that the child would become more powerful than he was. He saw this as a great opportunity, like Lucius did.

And so Lucius held his 16 month old son in his arms when he apparated to Riddle Manor. How odd. No one else was there. The presentation of Lord Voldemort's new heir was supposed to be a big event, with all the Death Eaters being there to see Lucius's triumph. Maybe Lucius had been told an early arrival time so they could prepare for the ceremony. The house elves would have a lot of work to do to prepare the Hall for the presentation. It was now completely dark, no chairs or tables set up, no banners or food to celebrate this great day.

A tall, hooded figure walked through the empty hall and stopped in front of Lucius. Lord Voldemort, at last. Little Harry squirmed in his arms. Lucius looked down at his darling son, with his mother's green eyes and his father's white-blond hair, and knew that this would be the happiest day of his life.

Lord Voldemort said, "Is that your son, Lucius?"

"Yes, my lord, this is Harry Malfoy." Lucius held his son so his master could see the child himself. "Would you like to hold him?"

Lord Voldemort looked at Harry and then shook his head no. "Place him on the floor and step away."

"On the floor?" He looked at the wooden floor. It looked reasonably clean, at least, but he had no idea why Lord Voldemort would want him to put his child on the ground. If he wanted to cast special spells on Harry, he could do it best by holding Harry himself. Lucius had cast hundreds of protection spells on Harry since his birth. Harry liked the feel of magic.

Well, Lord Voldemort was not very good with children. In fact, he had an alarming tendency to attack orphanages and kill everyone. Lucius had always been opposed to those raids and hoped to convince Lord Voldemort to change that part of his campaign against Dumbledore. It wasn't very good propaganda for their side.

Lucius did as Voldemort said, and put Harry on the floor and stepped back reluctantly. It didn't feel natural to let strangers cast anything on his son. He trusted Lord Voldemort with his life, and he knew that Harry had nothing to fear from the Dark Lord, but he thought of those orphanages and wondered if he should have kept quiet about Harry's prophecy until he was maybe 18-years-old.

Though he would never, ever admit it, Lucius was taken completely by surprised by what happened next.

Lord Voldemort raised his wand, pointed it at Harry Malfoy, and said in a cold, low voice, "Avada Kedavra."

Before he had even fully understood what had happened, Lucius dove down to fall in front of the bright green light. He was a father and he had to protect his son. But he wasn't fast enough. The curse missed him and hit Harry and then, if he could really believe his eyes, bounced back, barely missing Lucius again, and hit Lord Voldemort.

The killing curse bounced? Lord Voldemort used the killing curse? Harry deflected it? Lucius had no idea what was going on, but he knew he had to protect Harry and get them both out of there as quickly as possible. He rolled over so he could hold his son and keep his body between Lord Voldemort and Harry. He waited for whatever curse Voldemort would try next.

But nothing happened. There were no sounds at all.

After an eternity of waiting, Lucius called out, "Are you waiting for me to step back and give you another chance to kill my son? You tried to kill Harry!"

Nothing. Lucius moved slightly so he could get out his own wand. Not a sound. He couldn't even hear whether Lord Voldemort had moved since he had cast the curse. It was dead quiet and dark. Lucius held his son and waited. And waited.

"Lord Voldemort? My lord?"

He must be contacting others to help him! Lucius jumped up and turned with his wand pointed to where Lord Voldemort had been standing, but there was no one there. He cast a powerful "Lumos" that illuminated the entire hall.

"Fuck." Where the Dark Lord had been standing was now a pile of ash. Harry Malfoy had just killed Lord Voldemort by reflecting the killing curse. Lucius had to get to Albus Dumbledore fast, and he had better think of a good story even faster.

The prophecy was right. Harry was already the most powerful wizard ever.

II. Draco Potter

James Potter thought he would get the perfect revenge on Lucius Malfoy for stealing his girlfriend by going after Lucius's former fiancée, Narcissa Black. She was so superior, so icy cold, so snobby, so Dark, so powerful, so beautiful, and so very, very angry that her engagement with the Malfoy family had been broken. The Blacks had legendary tempers, and Narcissa showed hers.

"I will go to Hogsmeade with you if you give me all of Lucius Malfoy's hair," she had declared to James when he asked her out.

James loved a challenge. He snuck into the Slytherin dorm one night. He even got Lucius Malfoy's eyelashes. Lily tried very hard to be angry with James, but they had been good friends even before they had dated and he knew she wasn't angry with him. She laughed and made him promise not to do that to her boyfriend again, unless she asked him to.

Narcissa Black accepted the box of hair like a trophy and let James buy her a cup of tea at Madam Puddifoot's. She did not let him kiss her or hold her hand. She hardly said anything to him, but she couldn't stop herself from smiling and even laughing at some of his jokes.

Getting Narcissa to laugh became a new challenge. Getting her to actually talk to him and treat him like an equal was an even bigger challenge. And getting her to marry him was his greatest victory ever. She was still cold and wicked, but she was his dark witch.

When Lily Malfoy came over to Godric's Hollow and announced that she was pregnant, Narcissa had said, "In that case, I will have a son, too."

Lily and James were both surprised by that. "You mean you're expecting, too?" Lily asked.

"I will be," she said. "Tomorrow." She looked at James, and he blushed. He came from a long line of Light wizards, and he was often taken by surprise by Dark magic that Narcissa grew up with. The next day, she most certainly was pregnant with the male heir to the Potter family.

James tried not to be bothered that his wife was so determined to out-do the Malfoys. He knew that she had not forgiven Lucius for choosing Lily over herself, but he hoped that Narcissa would give it up. Not only was she anti-Lily, she also became very anti-Voldemort and often assisted James in his auror missions.

Draco Potter was born on the last day of July to a couple who had survived three unsuccessful Death Eater attacks on their home. According to Albus Dumbledore, this meant that Draco was going to defeat Lord Voldemort. Narcissa was as close to being thrilled as James had ever seen her.

"It's too bad that we cannot tell the Malfoys the good news," she said. "They will be so happy that they can stop publicly supporting the losing side in the war."

Sirius told James that Narcissa really was happy as James's wife and that she probably really did love him. The Blacks have never been an openly affectionate family. It's just the way they were taught to behave. Anyway, if she really hated him, she would have killed him by now.

James was affectionate and loving enough for two. His wife was the most beautiful and most evil dark witch that ever lived – which was the sort of praise she liked the most – and his son was the most clever and most adorable baby ever. Narcissa worried about Draco's hair, which was even messier than his father's and required her to use even stronger charms to keep it styled. He had his father's dark hair and brown eyes, but everyone agreed that he looked just like his mother, the very fair skin, small pointy nose, and quick, wicked smile.

After the emergency Order of the Phoenix meeting on Halloween, 1981, Narcissa Potter told her husband, "Lucius is lying. He must be."

"But Malfoy and Snape's Dark Marks have faded, and Dumbledore went there and saw the pile of ash himself. Voldemort is dead."

"Nonsense," she said. "Prophecies don't lie. Only Draco can kill him."

"It looks like Harry Malfoy beat him to it. How could anyone reflect the killing curse? I didn't know the kid was so strong. No wonder Lucius is so devoted to him."

"Lucius is a terrible father. He is treating his son like a pampered little prince. Harry will be intolerable. People may celebrate Harry Malfoy all they want now, but when they find out that Voldemort isn't really dead, they will see how much more special our son is."

James knew by now when not to argue with his wife, which was most of the time.

Draco Potter didn't understand why his father said that he had to invite Harry Malfoy to his eighth birthday party. He didn't like Harry Malfoy. He didn't even know him. He wanted to invite only Mrs. Malfoy. She was friends with his dad, and she was nice and funny and pretty, even though Draco's mother called her an awful, uncultured muggle. Draco's mother wasn't very nice about anyone except Draco, and that meant that she loved him very, very much.

Harry Malfoy had saved the world when he was a baby, and he was still famous because of that. The Daily Prophet called him 'The Boy Who Lived'. Draco wanted to be famous, too, and he asked his mother if he could save the world and become just like Harry Malfoy. That was the wrong thing to ask his mother, because she didn't like Harry Malfoy and she did not want her only son wishing to be 'just like Harry Malfoy'.

"Does Harry Malfoy have to come to my party?" Draco asked his mother.

"Yes, unfortunately," his mother said. "His mother wants him to meet more children his age, and your father has agreed to risk all our lives by inviting the boy here."

"Will he try to kill us?" That sounded much more interesting than Draco's seventh birthday. No one tried to kill him then. He would definitely get into the Daily Prophet if he saved his family from a vicious attack by The Boy Who Lived.

"He won't try to kill us on purpose. He has problems controlling his magic when he's away from home. That's Lucius's fault, of course, for keeping him too much at home."

Draco's mother had a special expression whenever she mentioned Lucius Malfoy, like she was happily imagining his slow and gruesome death. Draco knew from the Daily Prophet that Mr. Malfoy was an important politician in the Ministry of Magic. The Potters always actively supported all his opponents from every party during Ministry elections.

Draco's dad said that Lucius Malfoy didn't deserve to be married to Mrs. Malfoy. Draco's mother said that he deserved to be thrown out of the Ministry, all his property taken away, and his family tossed into the grimiest streets of Muggle London. Mr. Malfoy was definitely not invited to Draco's party.

Draco's mother continued, "You must be very careful around Harry Malfoy. At some point during the party, he will have a major outburst of accidental magic that will destroy lots of valuable things, and then we have to all praise him for being freakishly powerful for his age."

"But it's my birthday. Shouldn't people say nice things about me?"

"Of course they will, dear, but you need to be prepared for Harry Malfoy. He is a family friend, and we must get used to him."

Harry Malfoy was not as impressive in person as he seemed in the Daily Prophet. He was just a boy. He wore grown-up style robes with the Malfoy family crest, and he looked very uncomfortable in them. He was supposed to be famous, but he seemed, well, shy.

"Thank you for inviting me to your party," he said very quietly and properly after their parents left them together.

"Thank you for saving the wizarding world from the evil Dark Lord," Draco said, which was what he always imagined saying when he finally met Harry Malfoy.

"That was when I was a baby. I don't even remember it."

Draco was waiting for the freakishly powerful accidental magic to blow him up, but Harry Malfoy didn't seem to be life-threatening at all. In that case, he would have to become Draco's newest best friend. He was the world-famous Boy Who Lived, after all. He could bring Draco along when he saved the world next, and then Draco would be in the Daily Prophet, too.

"Ask your dad to use a pensieve so you can see the memory of your great victory against the most feared Dark Lord since Grindelwald. My dad showed me the finals of the 1978 Quidditch World Cup with Professor Dumbledore's pensieve once. It was awesome."

Harry said, "I don't know if my dad has a pensieve."

Lucius Malfoy would probably not want to preserve the memory of all the wicked deeds he had committed in the Ministry. He must rob widows of all their money and feed orphans to werewolves. Why else would Draco's mother say that he deserved a cell in Azkaban? But Draco knew that he should not tell Harry the truth about his father.

"I bet there was tons of blood and guts everywhere. If you get one, I want to watch, too." Since Harry was Draco's newest best friend, Draco shared the super-big secret that his mother told him not to tell other people. Draco said in a lowered voice, "It's a secret, but Mother says that the Dark Lord will return and then I'll get to kill him, too."

"But Voldemort is dead," Harry said.

Draco briefly wondered whether Harry was too stupid to be his best friend. He said, "Now. But Mother says he has to come back, and then I'll kill him."

"But that's impossible. Dead people don't come back."

"My mother said so. Do you think she lied to me?" There was no mistaking the answer to that question. Everyone in the Potter family worshiped Narcissa Potter. She was the voice of reason and authority. But Harry Malfoy had not been in Godric's Hollow long enough to understand that important fact.

Harry said, "My mom said that your mom is scary and crazy."

If Draco Potter knew any painful hexes, Harry Malfoy would now be in serious pain. As an eight-year-old untrained wizard, he could only fight back with more insults. "No, she isn't. Aunt Bella and Uncle Sirius are crazy, but not Mother. She knows everything, and she says that your mom is a stupid muggle."

"You take that back!"

"She says your mom is awful and ugly, too. And she called you a freak."

Then came the inevitable Harry Malfoy accidental magic. Draco Potter was levitated to the ceiling and it took the adults at the party all afternoon to find a way to get him down. While on the ceiling, Draco decided that he did not like Harry Malfoy anymore. He was very glad when his mother brought him back to the floor.

Uncle Sirius was impressed by Harry Malfoy's strong early magic. Mrs. Malfoy laughed. Draco's dad thought Harry was hilarious, and he made certain that Harry Malfoy was invited to every one of Draco's parties after that.