Of golddiggers and blonde airheads

Spoilers : 3x11
Rating : R
Characters : Logan-centric
Disclaimer : Just so we're clear, I don't own a thing.
Summary : You know everything's gone to hell when Dick Casablancas gives you insight into your love life.
Warning : Some swearing, sexual situations – nothing too graphic.

A/N : This wasn't beta-read and is probably full of silly mistakes. If you feel like beta-reading my stuff, please drop me a line. I will be your slave.

He's thinking about Kendall. Why he would think about her now is totally lost on him. He hasn't heard about her in months and hasn't given her a thought since. It's troubling, though, how Kendall is very good at what she does – at pleasing wealthy man. Her personality morphs into whoever she's expected to be. With her husband she exuded docility and faux sweetness. With her stepsons, she excelled in the part of the archetypal bitch. With him, she was cutting, sharp as a glass. She bossed him around, reminded him of his many flaws. It's that obvious, how much he likes women to step all over him. Rip him open, make him bleed. It's a little fetish he discovered with Lilly.

He's sitting here, in this luxury suite in Aspen, bored as hell at the party he threw to celebrate his new found freedom. He's getting methodically drunk as he ponders his options. He could have any girl in the room, if he'd set his mind to it. It's easy, it's always been way too fucking easy. He's rich. He's reasonably handsome. His name is famous and his face was all over the tabloids long enough for girls to notice him immediately in a crowd. He needs to fuck away the vivid image of Veronica's teary eyes when he broke up with her, beating her to it this time. The thought makes his eyes burn, and he realises Dick might have been right about the damage she caused to his man parts. You know everything's gone to hell when Dick Casablancas gives you insight into your love life.

He meant every word he's said that day. It's probably the most open-hearted he's ever been to her. She looked genuinely surprised, that's how he realised she didn't know him at all. He had to let her go because she was about to do the same, he knew, and he couldn't handle the rejection again. She made him feel so lacking, just like Lilly. He's such a needy little boy, so desperate for affection and approval he can hardly hide it. 'Yeah', she had said. Much too little, way too late.

So, when Madison Sinclair starts monologuing some nonsense in his general direction, he doesn't ask her to shut up. When she sits too close and touches his arm insistently, he doesn't push her away. A moment later, when she lures him into her own room, he quietly follows. He thinks about Dick for a minute, wondering if he noticed him leaving with his ex. Surely, even Dick would be slightly wounded that his best friend would fuck both his step-mother and ex-girlfriend in a matter of months. Like father, like son. As soon as he thinks these words, the image of his father with Lilly pops up from the darkest corner of his mind. Lilly on top of his dad. Aaron's ecstatic face. Suddenly, he doesn't worry about hurting Dick's feeling anymore.

As he carelessly undresses Madison, his mind flies back to that day he screwed Kendall while Veronica was all over Duncan in the next room. She certainly didn't seem to mind him witnessing their petting sessions, just weeks after he confessed his love to her. Did she even wonder why he didn't get his own suite? It's not like he couldn't afford it.Watching them together sent exquisite, poisonous waves of pain coursing through his body, letting him both irate and miserable. He craved it, ached for it. The $50,000 experience, over and over again. He never let out too much, of course. If Aaron taught him anything, it's to handle pain like a man. It's been a year and he still hopes Veronica heard every moan, every scream, every shaky breath, even.

With Madison, he doesn't try too hard. He's drunk, a bit dizzy, and he could hardly care less. He's not delicate or smooth, but makes up for it with a fury she's probably mistaking for enthusiasm. He's fueled by pain and an overwhelming bitterness, just like he was with Kendall. And it helps, that Veronica really hates her. He's fucking the embodiment of everything his lost love despises, and when she comes very vocally, he only wishes Veronica Mars could hear her.