"Where's Vala?" Daniel whispered to Sam. Suddenly a hoard of villagers came bustling down the street.

"Witch! Witch! Witch! We found a WITCH!"

The team walked over to where the crowd was walking to see what the fuss was about. In the middle of the crowd and being pushed forward to an authoritative looking man, was… Vala. She looked very annoyed and had a plastic nose strapped over her face.

"I'm not a witch!" Vala protested, pushing away the grips of the villagers. Daniel sighed. "They dressed me up like this!"

Cam frowned at the peasants, obviously trying hard not to laugh. "Did you dress her up?"

The villagers glanced at each other. "We gave her the nose…"

"There are ways of telling whether she is a witch," the authoritative looking man proclaimed.

"Are there? Oh well, tell us," Daniel demanded, sounding exasperated.

"Tell me. What do you do with witches?"

"Burn them," one of the peasants replied enthusiastically.

"And what do you burn, apart from witches?"

"More witches!"

"Wood," Teal'c replied.

"Good. Now, why do witches burn?"

"...Because they're made of... wood?" another peasant tried. Sam coughed.

"Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?"

Daniel looked incredulous.

"Build a bridge out of her!" the first peasant replied with gusto. Both Daniel and Sam coughed.

"But can you not also build bridges out of stone?" the man pointed out.

"Oh yeah." The peasant looked down put.

"Does wood sink in water?"

"No, no, it floats! It floats! Throw her into the pond!" the peasant exclaimed, eyes bright.

"No, no. What else floats in water?"

Suddenly a flurry of answers rose up from the crowd.



"Very small rocks!"






"Lead! Lead!"

"A duck," Cam yelled through hysterical laughter. The man looked at him admiringly.

"Exactly. So, logically…"

"I don't see what's logical about any of this," Daniel muttered.

"If she weighed the same as a duck…she's made of wood," the first peasant concluded slowly.

"So, therefore…" the man prodded.


Vala growled.

A/N: I love reviewers and live for constructive criticism!