"Oh, I come from a land,
From a far away place,
Where the Airbender Nomads roam.
Where they burn you with fire,
If they don't like your face.
It's barbaric, but, hey, it's home.
When the wind's from the east,
And the sun's from the west
And the sand in the glass is right
Come on down, stop on by
Hop a carpet and fly
To another Avatarian niiiiiiiiiight!
Like Avatarian daaaaaaaaaays,
More often than not
Are hotter than hot
In a lot of good waaaaaaaaaays!
'Neath Avatarian moooooooooons
A fool off his guard
Could fall and fall hard
Out there on the duuuuuuuunes."
"Aah, hello and good evening to you, worthy friend," the cabbage man said to the audience. "Please, please, come closer!" The audience moves to where they are pressed to his face. "Oof! Too close, a little too close." The audience moves a pace or two back. "There, welcome to Ba Sing Se, city of strength, of enchantment. All cabbages on sale today! Come on down! Heh heh. Look, look at this! This cabbage right here! Early spring cabbages! Young and crisp! Also make excellent coleslaw! Will not be dirty! Will not—" a fumble on the cabbage man's half caused the head to drop in the dirt. "It's soiled," he said darkly. "Ooooh. Look at this. I have never seen such a perfect cabbage. These are beautiful, healthy cabbages. Feel it! Ah, still good! Hee heh ha ha." The audience begins to move away. "Wait, don't go! I can see you're only interested in the exceptionally rare. I think then you would be most rewarded to consider…this." He withdrew a jade teapot from within his cart. "Do not be fooled by its commonplace appearance. Like so many things, it is not what is outside, but what is inside that counts." The audience moves away again. "This is no ordinary teapot!" he shouted. The audience turns back, curiosity peaked.
"It once changed the course of a young woman's life. A girl who like this teapot was more than what she seemed. A diamond in the rough. Perhaps you would like to hear the tale?" the cabbage man smiled. "It began on a dark night. Where a dark woman waited with a dark purpose…"